Mandel Maven's Nest Lilith Watch:
Critical Guide to Jewish Women on TV, in the Flicks and Pop Music

Jewish Women on TV

Jewish Women in (and Missing from) the Flicks

Jewish Women in Pop Music

To find specific reviews by Nora Lee Mandel search by title, scroll TV shows as listed by season since 1999, and films in alphabetical order of English title.

Unlike everybody else, I am very careful in my analyses of films and TV shows to identify Jewish characters through actual evidence in dialogue, actions or supporting visuals (like the ubiquitous menorah-on-the-shelf prop). I look at how the character is explicitly identified, but have had to expand to implications, particularly by a Jewish-type-sounding name, though I find that no one else makes these distinctions. But now I’ve expanded to what I call “putative Jews”.
I’ve started taking into account how the audience reacts to them based on external assumptions, particularly if Jewish actresses portray them, either as identified by general knowledge or perception of physical characteristics, particularly curly hair as Samantha Shokin described (Tablet Magazine 1/30/2014). In The Writers’ Room (on Sundance Channel, Spring 2014), Julianna Margulies, sporting her hair pulled back straight in a pony tail, explained why she wears a full wig as “Alicia Florick” on The Good Wife: “I wanted her to look WASPy, but I'm a Jew with curly hair and I was a new mom. . . The network now wants me to call other actresses and tell them this is a good thing not a bad thing.”
The British find us exotic, so the interviews are more explicit as in The Guardian, 8/26/2014, “Jenny Slate’s career almost ended when she swore on Saturday Night Live. Now she’s in the year’s most talked-about film. Hadley Freeman meets the star of Obvious Child. . .I do feel that I look traditionally Jewish, and it’s something I’m proud of and it’s something I’m a little bit insecure about, because I think maybe people don’t see me as myself. You know, that’s not the main girl, that’s the friend. But you know, I’ve realised that’s my issue. I’m glad that I look like myself and I didn’t get a nose job to fit in, and now I’m starring in this movie and people seem to like it. So fuck it.” So I’m following her career and the characters she portrays.
I also note personality or other stereotypes of the actor/actress’s Jewishness, however defined by ethnicity or observance or some kind of Jewish identity so that their characters implicitly become Jewish because they have been cast. (Such as “tough Jews”, as David Mamet calls them, at least for male portrayals, particularly when non-Jewish actors play Jews, though I intend to read and comment on his essays "The Jew for Export" and related ones on the impact of Hollywood’s anti-Semitism.) I am repulsed by using octoroon/Hitlerian family tree definitions of "being Jewish" for any actor/actress, but certainly there are people who Americans think “look Jewish”, though that usually means some general European ethnic-ness, that could just as easily be Mediterranean or Eastern European, which gets even more complicated by the portrayal of Israelis.
The true diversity of how Jews really look is rarely reflected, like my redhead, freckled siblings, where my brother can “pass” in Celtic bands. I am therefore just as intrigued if actors/actresses who are perceived/identified as Jewish get to play non-Jewish roles.

Why look at how Jewish women are portrayed on TV and in the movies? Others are documenting general or different specific images of women and the impact that has and the messages conveyed about women. The Geena Davis Institute on Gender in Media, at USC Annenberg School for Communication & Journalism, does terrific research on the quantity, quality, and types of women in film and television.
Apply her analysis to how Jewish women are portrayed: Geena Davis summarized her findings about female roles in G-rated movies and children's TV programming in The Wall Street Journal, 4/11/2011, "Life Imitates Art" interview with Rebecca Blumenstein: "They found that the more hours of television a girl watches, the fewer options she believes she has in life. And the more hours a boy watches, the more sexist his views become. . .Of the female characters that existed, the majority are highly stereotyped and/or hypersexualized. . . .Negative images can powerfully affect boys and girls, but positive images have the same kind of impact. We know that if girls can see characters doing unstereotyped kinds of occupations and activities, they're much more likely as an adult to pursue unusual and outside-the-box occupations."
The significance of this approach for other minorities: GLAAD annually does a detailed Network Responsibility Index/Where We Are on TV Report for “the quantity, quality, and diversity of images of LGBT people on television” and NOW did a feminist analysis of prime time TV, that took into account racial but not ethnic minority women on TV. The first Gender Bias Without Borders was “an investigation of female characters in popular films across 11 countries”. (updated 10/10/2014)

Why LilithWatch? Much of my thinking about the contemporary, post-"Molly Goldberg" image of Jewish women in popular culture was inspired by the archetypal "Lilith" on the long-running sitcoms Cheers/Frasier (played by Jewish actress Bebe Neuwirth). I used to do popular culture reviews examining how Jewish women are faring in television, rock 'n' roll etc. for LILITH Magazine, the national independent Jewish feminist quarterly.
Since the Lilith Fair women's concert tours 1997-1999 (and returning in 2010), the name “Lilith” has gotten associated even more with feminism, viz. the "Wichita Linebacker" episode of Veronica Mars, written by John Enbom and Phil Klemmer, which identified "Lilith House" as the locus for the stereotyped, protesting "militant feminists" at the fictional Hearst College.
Starting in the 3rd season of Supernatural, their Lilith was seen like a Super Demon whose death then was the Final Seal that brought on Armageddon at the end of the fourth season.)
In True Blood, in the 5th season, Lilith is worshipped (in Aramaic) as the First Human Vampyr, with her own Bible. Series creator Alan Ball, in an “Inside the Episode” interview after “In the Beginning”, describes that he conceived of her as “a Mesopotamian goddess” when she appears in a naked, then bloody vision to vampires (including Salome, yeah, that Salome) who drank what they believed was her blood. In the season finale by Ball, “Save Yourself”, a rebel vampire declares: She’s a mad god. She’s about nothing but destruction.-- just as her self-declared “Chosen One” drinks all her blood and reincarnates into a similar scary naked vision. The 6th season, in 2013, clarified this Lilith demonology. In “The Sun”, written by Angela Robinson, she appears in beautiful human form to him on “some spiritual plane” (as the writer explained in her “Inside the Episode” interview), albeit with three naked “blood sirens”, to correct misimpressions: God made me. Some worship me as a god, but there is no God but God., as she urges her Prophet to help vampires avoid a genocidal round-up he foresees in a sun-drowning crematorium. In “Fuck the Pain Away”, also by Robinson, sets Lilith’s first contact with human/fairies to 3500 B.C. At the naked Lilith’s first sight of “Warlow”: What are you. . God spoke to me of a creature like you. . You are destined to save vampire-kind. And she rapes and vamps him in the desert. Blended with her prophet today “she” declares: I made you into our savior!, though he is able to rid himself of her after a final image of her and her two minions blood-drenched bodies. At least her appearances here are getting more women to revive herstory. (updated 9/14/2014)



My particular focus is on romantic relationships, as popular culture so rarely portrays Jews with Jews, let alone in a positive light.



Jewish Women on TV
I got tired of people always citing "Mrs. Seinfeld" to me as proof there are still Jewish women on TV, whether one considers a nagging elderly mother as a positive image or not. So I started covering leading characters who are Jewish women in Friends, Babylon 5, Buffy the Vampire Killer, Once and Again, Will and Grace (which I found too silly a show to keep monitoring even as she did end up back with her supposedly Jewish doctor husband), etc. My comments on The Nanny have been quoted in the catalog for the Jewish Museum exhibit Entertaining America: Jews, Movies, and Broadcasting, edited by J. Hoberman and Jeffrey Shandler, published by Princeton University Press, in Shandler's essay "At Home on the Small Screen: Television's New York Jews", and then in Joyce Antler's excellent academic study You Never Call! You Never Write!: A History of the Jewish Mother (Oxford University Press, 2007). No, I didn't write up Dharma and Greg where "Dharma Finkelstein" is Jewish only for the novelty of the name, like Whoopi Goldberg; Entertainment Weekly claimed that Jenna Elfman was specifically hired for the role because she didn't look Jewish.
Then with so few lead Jewish women characters, even the usual Dead Jewish Mothers, I turned to monitoring supporting roles, though I hadn't earlier covered the likes of the best friend on Mad About You, or the bat mitzvah of “Muffy” (played by Jami Gertz), where Devo performed, on Square Pegs (David Browne in The New York Times review of the DVD of the series on 7/13/2008 calls her “the proto-yuppie”). But then with so few of even those, I looked for recurring Jewish women characters. With so few of even those, I'm now looking at guest turns. While I don't watch many sitcoms, I do watch Law and Orders to catch the Jewish Mother Murdering Matriarchs, fitting in with how executive producer Dick “Wolf maintains this consistency is by making most of the victims wealthy white people, which he believes viewers are more interested in watching. He limits the number of shows containing minority victims, including blacks and Muslims, to four or five episodes a season out of 22 to 24.” (per “Law and Disorder” by Rebecca Dana, The Wall Street Journal, 7/12/2008.) (I'm watching Law and Order: U.K., on BBC America, to see if the ethnic pattern from the adaptation of the U.S. scripts has been translated across The Pond.) (updated 10/5/2014)
With so few of those, I’m watching shows with Jewish male characters to see if they comment about their Jewish mothers or even date Jewish women, though my nephew Eliav told me I’m behind on the Jewish women references on The League. Plus I watch shows set in NYC to see if they ever have Jewish women characters, or shows in work settings like hospitals or law offices where in the real world it is common for Jews to be working. Like in NBC's Kings that though it was based on the Biblical book the closest it came to a Jewish woman was an odd "Sabbath Queen" as Death in a nightmare episode. So now, I'm als o now looking at made-for-TV-movies, time permitting. With so few definitely Jewish women on TV, I’m even commenting on putative Jewish women, who I define as those with clearly Jewish-sounding names with implied Jewish-ness unless specifically denied, particularly if the audience is viewing them as Jewish, and also even characters pretending to be Jewish. (updated 10/5/2014)
I do detailed transcriptions, when I have time, of full dialogue and scene descriptions because I’m annoyed by the snarky or too casual inaccuracy in fan/entertainment publication recaps, particularly in reference to Yiddish expressions or religious rituals, that get widely disseminated as definitive, let alone are blithely prone to assumptions and acceptance of stereotyping. So I figure there should be one place on the Web that presents the facts and context about Jewish women characters, by TV season to monitor changes over time, which I mostly define by the Emmy Awards criteria, so now starts around June 1. (updated 3/28/2014)
I have not kept up 100% with sitcoms, most kids' shows, such as on Nick or Disney, “unscripted” reality shows (like ones that switched a Jewish mother to a gentile family) or the Jewish mothers on The Real Housewives of New York City/The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, Extreme Guide to Parenting, NYC Prep, Russian Dolls, Shahs of Sunset, The Bachelorette, My Antonio’s Jewish mother, "procedurals" (those fiction investigation series without continuing story or character arcs), or Family Guy, satirical guests on The Simpsons, or Kyle Broslofski's Jewish mother satired on South Park, let alone Judge Judy. (updated 9/30/2014)

2014/2015 Season - Jewish women characters were on: Finding Your Roots with Henry Louis Gates, Jr., The Good Wife, Houdini, The Knick, The League, Makers: Women Who Make America, and The Strain. Putative Jewish women characters were on: The Blacklist, Boardwalk Empire and Chasing Life.
Arrow – Felicity Smoak in the 3rd Season
Big Bang Theory - Mrs. Wolowitz in the 8th Season
Broad City – 2nd season
The Fosters – Emma in her 2nd season
Girls – Shoshanna Shapiro in the 4th Season
Glee - Rachel Berry etc. in the 6th/final season
The Goldbergs – Beverly and Erica plus
The Honourable Woman – Nessa Stein and more
Inside Amy Schumer – 2nd Season
In the Face of Crime (Im Angesicht des Verbrechens)
Manhattan – Abigail Isaacs
Married – Jess in the 1st season
Transparent – 1st season

2013/2014 Season - Jewish women characters were on: Black Box, Call the Midwife, Drop Dead Diva, Fargo, Foyle’s War, Genealogy Roadshow, Generation Cryo, The League, The Mindy Project, New Girl, and Who Do You Think You Are?. Putative Jewish woman characters were on Elementary and Parks and Recreation.
Arrow – Felicity Smoak in the 2nd Season
Big Bang Theory - Mrs. Wolowitz in the 7th Season
Broad City
Community – Annie Edison in the 5th season
The Fosters – Emma in her 1st season
Girls – Shoshanna Shapiro in the 3rd Season
Glee - Rachel Berry etc. in the 5th season
The Goldbergs – Beverly and Erica plus
Hart of Dixie – Dr. Zoe Hart in the 2nd season
House of Lies - Sarah in her 2nd season
Joan Rivers – everywhere
Magic City – Evans family, etc. in the final, 2nd season
NCIS - Ziva David in her final season
Princesses: Long Island – 1st and hopefully only Season
Prisoners of War (Hatufim) – 2nd Season
Strike Back – Rebecca Levy in her 2nd season
Transparent– Sarah, Ali, family and friends in the pilot

2012/2013 Season - Jewish women characters were on: Alphas, The Bible, The Big C, Blue Bloods, Bunheads, Children’s Hospital, Covert Affairs, Happily Divorced, a Lifetime movie, Mad Men, Major Crimes, The Mentalist, Raising Hope, Southland, Spies of Warsaw, Suits, Upstair Downstairs, and Weeds. A putative Jewish woman character was on Parks and Recreation.
American Horror Story: Asylum – “Anne Frank”
Arrow – Felicity Smoak in the 1st Season
Big Bang Theory - Mrs. Wolowitz in the 6th Season
Community – Annie Edison in the 4th Season
Girls – Shoshanna Shapiro in the 2nd Season
Glee - Rachel Berry and Sugar Motta in the 4th season
Hart of Dixie – Dr. Zoe Hart in the 2nd season
House of Lies - Sarah in her 1st season
Inside Amy Schumer - 1st Season
Joan & Melissa: Joan Knows Best? - Joan and Melissa Rivers – 3rd season
NCIS - Ziva David in her 8th season
Prisoners of War (Hatufim) – 1st Season
Ripper Street – Deborah Goren in the 1st Season
Shameless (U.K.) – Esther Blanco (plus)
Strike Back – Rebecca Levy in her 1st season
Underemployed – Raviva

2011/2012 Season - Jewish women characters were on Blue Bloods, Bored to Death, Castle, Finding Your Roots with Henry Louis Gates, Jr., Gossip Girl, Happily Divorced, Hawthorne, Mad Men, MI-5 (Spooks), Modern Family, NYC 22, Pan Am, Prime Suspect, The Secret Life of the American Teenager, Southland, TNT’s Mystery Movies, and Who Do You Think You Are. Putative Jewish women characters were on The Good Wife, How To Make It In America, In Plain Sight and Lost Girl.
Big Bang Theory - Mrs. Wolowitz in the 5th Season
Community – Annie Edison in the 3rd Season
Curb Your Enthusiasm - Susie Greene etc.
Entourage - Mrs. Ari Gold in the 8th Season
Friday Night Dinner – Jackie Goodman in the 1st Season
Girls – Shoshanna Shapiro in the 1st Season
Glee - Rachel Berry and Sugar Motta in the 3rd season
Harry’s Law - Harriet Korn in the 2nd season
Hart of Dixie – Dr. Zoe Hart in the 1st season
Joan & Melissa: Joan Knows Best? - Joan and Melissa Rivers – 2nd season
Magic City – Evans family, etc. in the 1st season
NCIS - Ziva David in her 7th season

2010/2011 Season - Jewish women characters were on 100 Questions, Being Human (U.S.), Boardwalk Empire, Brothers & Sisters, Castle, Desperate Housewives, The Good Wife, Grey's Anatomy, Hung, Law and Order: Criminal Intent, Law and Order: Special Victims Unit, Nurse Jackie, Outcasts, Private Practice, and Upstairs Downstairs. I happened to catch a Jewish actress on the "make-over" show What Not To Wear. Putative Jewish women characters were on Californication, Hawthorne, Huge, and Mad Men.
18 To Life – Bellow Mother and Daughters
Big Bang Theory - Mrs. Wolowitz in the 4th Season
Community – Annie Edison in the 2nd Season
Being Erica – Erica Strange – 3rd season
Entourage - Mrs. Ari Gold in the 7th Season
Glee - Rachel Berry in the 2nd season
House, M.D. – Lisa Cuddy in the 7th season
Joan & Melissa: Joan Knows Best? - Joan and Melissa Rivers – 1st season
NCIS - Ziva David in her 6th season
Skins (U.S.) – Tea Marvelli

2009/2010 Season - Jewish women characters were on Bored To Death, The Deep End, Fringe, The Good Wife, Leverage, Inspector Lewis, Mercy, Nip/Tuck, Private Practice, Psych, The Secret Life of the American Teenager, Three Rivers, United States of Tara, Ugly Betty, and Who Do You Think You Are. Putative Jewish women characters were on Californication, Gray's Anatomy, Heroes, House, Party Down, and White Collar.
Big Bang Theory - Mrs. Wolowitz in the 3rd Season
Being Erica – Erica Strange – 2nd season
Community – Annie Edison in the 1st Season
Curb Your Enthusiasm - Susie Greene etc.
Entourage - Mrs. Ari Gold in the 6th Season
Glee - Rachel Berry
House, M.D. – Lisa Cuddy in the 6th season
NCIS - Ziva David in her 5th season
Z Rock – Dina Malinsky, Joan Rivers and others in the 2nd season

2008/9 Season - Jewish women characters were on C.S.I., C.S.I.: NY, Diamonds mini-series, Eli Stone, Gossip Girl, Hallmark Hall of Fame, In Plain Sight, Nurse Jackie, Saving Grace, The Unit, and a Lifetime Movie of the Week. I happened to also catch a Jewish actress on the "make-over" show What Not To Wear. Putative Jewish women characters appeared in 90210, Californication, The Cleaner, Desperate Housewives, E.R., Gossip Girl, Hawthorne, Monk, and Sons of Anarchy.
Big Bang Theory - Mrs. Wolowitz in the 2nd Season
Being Erica – Erica Strange
Entourage - Mrs. Ari Gold and others in the 5th season
House, M.D. – Lisa Cuddy in the 5th season
The L Word - Jenny Schecter in the 6th, final season
NCIS - Ziva David in her 4th season
Rescue Me – Valerie in her 2nd season
The Sarah Silverman Program in her 3rd season
The Starter Wife - Molly Kagan post-mini-series
Z Rock – Dina Malinsky, Joan Rivers and others


2007/8 Season- Jewish women were on The Cleaner, Eli Stone, Law and Order: Special Victims Unit, Lipstick Jungle, and House, M.D.. Putative Jewish women characters appeared in Big Shots, Californication, Cashmere Mafia, Canterbury’s Law, Desperate Housewives, Terminal City, and Ugly Betty.
Big Bang Theory - Mrs. Wolowitz in the 1st Season
Curb Your Enthusiasm - Susie Greene etc.
The L Word - Jenny Schecter in the 5th season
Mad Men - Rachel Menken and Bobbie Barrett
Mandrake – Berta Bronstein
NCIS - Ziva David in her 3rd season
Nip/Tuck– Rachel Ben Natan
Pushing Daisies– Charlotte “Chuck” Charles
The Riches – the faux Cherien Rich in her 2nd season
The Sarah Silverman Program in her 2nd season
Weeds – Bubbe Botwin
The Wire - Rhonda Pearlman in the 5th season


2006/7 Season- Jewish women characters also appeared on C.S.I., Desperate Housewives, E.R., Grey's Anatomy, House, M.D., John from Cincinnati, Justice, Numb3rs, The Nine, Nip/Tuck, Rescue Me, Rome, Standoff, State of Mind, The State Within, Ugly Betty, The Unit and Waking the Dead.
Brothers & Sisters – Nora Holden
Entourage - Mrs. Ari Gold and daughter Sarah in Season 3B and Entourage - Mrs. Ari Gold and daughter Sarah in Season 4
Heroes – Hana Gitelman
The L Word - Jenny Schecter in the 4th season
Mad Men - Rachel Menken
NCIS - Ziva David in her 2nd season
Rescue Me – Valerie in her 1st season and Beth Feinberg
The Riches – the faux Cherien Rich
The Sarah Silverman Program
Weeds - Yael Hoffman
The Wire - Rhonda Pearlman in the 4th season

2005/6 Season - Jewish women characters also appeared on E.R., Girlfriends, Grey's Anatomy, Nip/Tuck, Sea of Souls and Veronica Mars
Beautiful People - Annabelle Banks
Curb Your Enthusiasm - Susie Greene etc.
Entourage - Mrs. Ari Gold and daughter Sarah in the 3rd Season
Everwood - Delia Brown in the 4th season
The L Word - Jenny Schecter in the 3rd Season
NCIS - Ziva David
Sopranos - Julianna Skiff

2004/5 Season Jewish women characters also appeared on Grey's Anatomy, Judging Amy, Law and Order, Nip/Tuck, Veronica Mars and Waking the Dead.
Entourage - Mrs. Ari Gold
Everwood
Joan of Arcadia
The L Word - Jenny Schecter in the 2nd Season
Numb3rs - The Late Mrs. Eppes
The O.C. - Rebecca Bloom and the Nana in the 2nd Season
Pilot Season
Queer as Folk - Melanie Marcus in the 5th Season
The Wire - Rhonda Pearlman in the 3rd season

2003/4 Season Jewish women characters also appeared on CSI, Judging Amy and Law and Order: Criminal Intent.
Curb Your Enthusiasm - Anna
Everwood
Gilmore Girls - Paris Geller
Joan of Arcadia
The L Word - Jenny Schecter
Line of Fire
Miss Match
Nip/Tuck - Mrs. Grubman
The O.C. - Anna Stern and the Nana
The Practice
Rocked With Gina Gershon
Sex and the City - Charlotte Goldenblatt
Skin
Sopranos- Fran Felstein
Street Time - Rachel Goldstein
Wonderfalls

2002/3 Season
Breaking News
Everwood
Curb Your Enthusiasm
Gilmore Girls - Paris Geller
Law and Order
Sex and the City - Charlotte York
Street Time - Rachel Goldstein
That Was Then
The Wire

2001/2 Season
7th Heaven

2000/2001 Season

1999/2000 Season



2014/2015 Season

The increased visibility of Jewish women comediennes on TV, led Jewcy to offer Sukkot decorations of ushpizot all from TV as “Ushpizienne: Class of 5775”: Lena Dunham [as the auteur of Girls], Amy Schumer [Inside Amy Schumer, Abbi Jacobson and Ilana Glazer [Broad City], Jenny Slate [Married], Sarah Silverman [guesting everywhere], and Yael Stone [though her character “Lorna Morello” in Orange Is the New Black (on Netflix) is not Jewish]: (10/12/2014)

On Finding Your Roots with Henry Louis Gates, Jr. (on PBS), Canadian-born, bi-racial actress Gloria Reuben [the transcript is not completely accurate] got confirmation that her father, who died when she was very young, was Jewish, but from Jamaica in the post-expulsion diaspora from Spain. Prof. Gates notes: On December 19th, 1831, just months before your great-grandparents’ wedding, the Jewish people in Jamaica were finally granted full rights under the law. . . Too late to have a bat mitzvah,, he joked. She laughs: So basically, I’m a Jewish girl in a black body. That was so not PC! -- and her DNA is 59% European. Basketball player Rebecca Lobo discovers that the unknown father of her grandmother, a domestic servant photographed dressed in fur, was an Ashkenazi Jew – with no further commentary.
Similarly, the American Masters Me-Generation episode “The Boomer List” only indirectly referenced Jewish women, by including Eve Ensler, who talked about feminisn not her paternal ethnic identity, and Rosie O’Donnell, who quoted the maternal Yiddish endearments -- includingshaina maidel-- of a school friend’s mother for providing her first warmth and affection. (updated 9/30/2014)

In The Blacklist (on NBC), the convoluted conspiracy spy thriller series, in the season opening “Lord Baltimore” episode, written by Jon Bokenkamp and John Eisendrath, a mysterious beautiful woman, “Samar Navabi” (played by Iranian-American Mozhan Marnò, of The Stoning of Soraya M.), rescues the master criminal/FBI informant “Red” (James Spader). She talks on the phone in something like Hebrew as he tries to figure out who she is and how she found him through a very complicated and ingenious tracking of his preferences for earth tone color clothes: Lord Baltimore? Aren’t you a surprisingly sexy minx. She smirks: Who is it exactly do you think I am? He: You’re Mossad. Please don’t tell me this is about that little dust-up in Haifa? She: That “little dust-up in Haifa” claimed the lives of two agents and a Turkish diplomat. They taunt each other – but he figures out that her falcon tattoo is a tribute to her brother killed in a terrorist attack, whose name meant “falcon” in Farsi – so I’m not sure if she’s Jewish and/or Iranian and/or Israeli. She showed up again for a nick-of-time rescue in “Monarch Douglas Bank”, written by Kristen Reidel, Amanda Kate Shuman, and Daniel Knauf, and was filmed in my neighborhood standing in for a Polish city:I’m Samar Navabi, I’m Mossad. You’re outgunned – go I’ll cover you – go! And she lets loose with a machine gun volley. The FBI is surprised: Who the hell is Samar Navabi? Both sides figure out her usefulness, because she hands over a file to the FBI, evidently to get on the team—then slyly assures “Red” “I’m in.” So she’s (at least) a double agent. (updated 10/16/2014)

On The Good Wife, the daughter of poitical consultant “Eli Gold (played by Alan Cumming) returned in the season opener “The Line”, written by series’ producers Robert & Michelle King, though now “Marissa” (played by Sharon Steele) is the usual brunette, curly-haired, wise-cracking Jewish female sidekick. She’s first idly making conversation with him: I liked your old office better. This is more like a dentist’s office. . .I thought Chicago was corrupt can’t you just steal more. . . I told you I was fired. . .From the juice bar. She does funny, sexy commentary about a pretty young intern, then he introduces her to his boss “Governor Peter Florrick” (played by Chris Noth): I voted for you – absentee ballot in Israel. “Eli”: She spent two years in the IDF. Governor: That’s impressive. She confronts the intern that her father is too nervous to ask about the rumor that she’s not wearing panties, and announces: I want to learn your job. I think I’d be good at it. “Eli”: No you don’t.(10/8/2014)

Though Makers: Women Who Make America – Women in Comedy (on PBS) featured many Jewish women comics and writers, including Bea Arthur, Roseanne Barr, Joy Behar, Susie Essman, Chelsea Handler, Laraine Newman, Gail Parent, Totie Fields, and “in loving memory” the late Joan Rivers, only the clips and interviews with and about Sarah Silverman specifically referred to her as Jewish and in a Jewish context, that somehow in their minds were linked to her sweetness and prettiness, in contrast to the earlier comics making fun of themselves.
Silverman herself did a fondly funny tribute to Rivers in her return as guest host on NBC’s Saturday Night Live, sans Jewish references. (updated 10/5/2014)

In the 5th/final season of Boardwalk Empire, set in 1932, there was finally more than a cameo appearance by a wife of one of the Jewish Prohibition-era gangsters. In the “What Jesus Said” episode, written by Cristine Chambers and Howard Korder, the widow of Arnold Rothstein has the real name of “Carolyn Rothstein” (neé Green) (played by Shae D'lyn) is shrewdly demanding back embezzled profits from inside trader stock trades, through blackmail of the central gangster’s wife, and out of bitterness about her philandering, milk-drinking husband -- I don't keep milk in the house anymore, it turns my stomach. . .And when he died? . . Do you know what I have to show for it? This tea set, that hideous chair, this ring. Oh, and humiliation. Arnold left me buckets of that. Everything else I've had to sell. . .Let’s see how you like seeing your name in the paper next to the words “notorious husband”. (10/9/2014)

In Royal Pains (on USA), episode “Oh, M. G.” written by Aubrey Karr, ill nail artist “Lauren” (played by Tracee Chimo) is told to rest. But she protests: I’ve been hired to do nails at the Mendelsohn bat mitzvah tonight, and posting cool nails on Instagram is everything to a 12 year old girl! The physician’s assistant warns her if she doesn’t rest, she’ll miss more than one bat mitzvah. (8/23/2014)

In The Knick (on Cinemax), set in 1900 at a downtown New York City hospital The Knickerbocker where medical doctors are pioneering risky surgical and experimental procedures and treatments, but have retrograde social and racial ethnic and class biases, the episode “Where’s The Dignity”, written by series creators Jack Amiel & Michael Begler, the surgeon “Dr. Bertram 'Bertie' Chickering Jr.” (played by Michael Angarano) says a few words in her language as he examines a coughing, middle-aged woman with a babushka. To his disapproving uptown doctor father, he shows off his quick diagnosis : I’m starting to pick some of it up. They said Latin and Greek are the most important languages for a physician to learn. It’s actually something called Yiddish. . .Lungs are full. Fever. Looks like pneumonia. Not likely tuberculosis. She’s a secondary emergency. and chalks her with a #2. (updated 9/10/2014)

In The League (sports sitcom on FX), Lizzy Caplan returned as the Orthodox Jew “Rebecca Ruxin”, sister of League member “Rodney”, in the episode “When Rafi Met Randy”, written by Jason Mantzoukas and Seth Rogen. In what is a fantasy flashback, she runs in to find her true love “Rafi” (played by Mantzoukas) fallen at the bottom of the stairs, and tearily revives him by putting his hand on her breast. He awakes: It’s a mitzvah. She agrees, and they are about to be married when shirtless “Dirty Randy” (Rogen) interrupts to be the best man: Now go make an honest Jew out of her. Their big kiss returns them all to reality. (Thanks to Eliav Levy for the citation).
I don’t know if an earlier appearance by her in the series was being referenced in the 6th season opener when “Jenny MacArthur” (played by Katie Aselton) in the “Sitting Shiva” episode, written by Jeff Schaffer and Jackie Marcus Schaffer, claimed at a Jewish funeral of a league member to know the difference between “shiva” and “Shiva” because I was Jewish for a brief time last year, though that has been a running joke in the series the few times I’ve watched it. (updated 10/15/2014)

In Houdini (on History), mini-series written by Nicholas Meyer (based on the out-of-print Houdini: A Mind in Chains: A Psychoanalytic Portrait by Bernard C. Meyer M.D., his mother Cecilia Weiss (played by Hungarian actress Eszter Ónodi) is a more talked-about influence than active presence. Says Houdini (played by Adrien Brody): If not for my mother, I would have gone nowhere. She always believed in me. -- and I wasn’t sure if she was speaking Yiddish or Hungarian when she did get to mostly say Erich, my hero!” when he brings home coins like magic to his poor childhood in Appleton, Wisconsin. (He’s described as “a German-speaking Hungarian Jew”.) He bring her: Welcome to Brooklyn. This is the home you’ve always deserved. She replies, in Hungarian or whatever: Now we can all be together. He: Ma deserved the best, because the best is what she inspired me to become. And I was finally given the chance to thank her for it. His wife “Bess” (played by Kristen Connolly) explains the ceremony where he places her on a throne-like chair at a reception: Queen for a Day. People thought she married beneath her, marrying a rabbi. To her, Harry is magic. He beams at his mother: Didn’t I promise you gold one day? She, per the subtitles: Erich, You are my gold.
Part 2 focused on her unusual impact on his career. After performing a new trick on stage, where he visualized her, he chortles at the family breakfast: I told everyone I saw you, Ma. You’ve been guiding me back forever. He shows off a headline: “Houdini Guided by Mother’s Voice to Safety”. She talks to him and his brother in Hungarian. He translates: She called me a liar. His brother “Dash” (played by Tom Benedict Knight) translates: She thinks I’ve been fighting with my brother. It’s just for publicity! (Meanwhile his wife makes a nasty crack about being married to a Jew and goes off to church for comfort.) When the government pushes him to tour Europe again, his mother cries at his farewell: Perhaps when you return I will not be here anymore., according to the subtitles. She gives him quite a big kiss goodbye. His wife, of course, is overly optimistic: She’ll be fine. In Europe, he gets a telegram from his brother: “Sorry to inform you of mother’s death last night in NJ. Sudden and peaceful.” He collapsesDon’t let them bury her until I’m home. He weeps into his wife’s arms. Back in Brooklyn NY 1914, during the funeral at a Jewish cemetery, his brother says her last words were “forgive”. He asks: Forgive who? For what? . . .My mother’s death was a sucker punch that I wasn’t near ready for and hit me harder than anything ever had. He weeps at her grave, and repeats her words. ’My hero.’ You always believed in me, Ma. Who’s going to believe in me now? His assistant “Jim Collins” (played by Evan Jones) assumes he can do something supernatural: Can’t you contact her? Though he flashes back to his own fake medium shows with his wife, in 1896 Kansas, where he first learned that can hurt people’s feelings, he desperately sets off to find spiritualists: If anyone could contact Ma in the hereafter it was me. When none of them can, he sets off on a campaign against them and issues a challenge, which is met by Sir Conan Doyle and his wife. He’s teary listening to her at their session and watching her supposed automatic writing. But he later realizes: Ma never would have forgot my birthday. Lady Doyle is a fraud! Your wife is a fake! Her whole life my mother never spoke one word of English! Doyle claims she translated, but Houdini continues to rant: A mother not mentioning her son’s birthday? She never missed, not once! Your wife is a fake! You hear me - Lady Doyle – you’re a fake! He attacks them in a radio rant and doubles his challenge prize: Until now I have tried in good faith to contact my beloved mother. But I now declare total war on the spiritualists. I will devote my whole life to challenge their exploitation of a gullible public. He confesses to his assistant: They didn’t get it. I wanted to be proven wrong – to reach the other side., as we see images of his mother. He goes to Boston to meet with a noted medium, asks her to contact his mother, then confronts her and her team, who put a curse on him. When he refuses to be seduced by her, she sends an attacker, which leads to his death. The closing irony is that his wife then uses a medium to try to reach him. (updated 9/3/2014)



The Strain (horror series on FX, produced by Guillermo del Toro and Chuck Hogan, based on their graphic novel), True Blood also featured flashbacks to vampires fitting right in as Nazis. “Runaways”, teleplay by Gennifer Hutchison, vampire hunter “Abraham Setrakian” (played by David Bradley) tells the CDC doctor about the threat he first knew by the Romanian term “strigoi”: When I was a little boy, my grandmother, my bubbe, told me fairy stories about the strigoi and The Master. I thought they were only stories, until I saw the devil with my own eyes. Flashback to a train and a crowded cattle car in 1944 Poland. He’s a young man (played by Jim Watson) huddled with his “bubbe” (played by Kathleen Chalfant): The train will stop soon and you’ll be able to stretch your legs, bubbe. She warns: This train I don’t wish to go any faster. Where this train is going I don’t think we will be happy to arrive at our destination. . .Abraham, remember the stories I told you. Evil lurks in this world, and I fear we are soon to meet it. They are shouted off with dogs at a concentration camp (fans say the book specified Treblinka 1943), where the commandante is the same “Thomas Eichhorst” (played by Richard Sammel) who we’ve seen in today’s Manhattan, announces: You will work here for the welfare of a new Europe. Together we will work for a better world for future generations. This is a place of honor and discipline. Do your work and you shall be treated accordingly. The grandmother is pulled away as he tries to stop the beating officer: Abraham no! Leave him alone! His friend (who some recappers assume is his brother): Let her go! “Abraham” cries: I have to protect her! She takes a last look back at him from her line of women, while he and his friend claim they’re carpenters, and smoke rises over the background. The camp is full of yellow-starred Jews who are being beaten, and at night in the barracks at night the bloodsucker attacks one by one. “Abraham” whispers to his friend: I saw a creature. It was feeding. . It was real. My bubbe told me stories as a child, stories of a monster who feed on the blood of men and was drawn by human misery. What place is more miserable than this?. . .She told me the only way to kill it was with silver. If we can get into the metal shop? Friend: Stop looking for monsters! We’re already surrounded by them. “Abraham”: We’re already surrounded by them. (He witnesses close-up his friend become another victim.) His name seems Armenian, so his Yiddishe grandmother’s stories seemed to be more Roma and his triangle badge could be the Roma’s brown, or the inverted red of political prisoners, so it’s a bit confusing, and misperceived by fans, if she is Jewish.
”For Services Rendered”, teleplay by David Weddle and Bradley Thompson, was clearer that “Abraham”s family is Jewish. He explained his weapons: Silver burns them. I learned of these creatures from my bubbe, my grandmother, when I was eight. She was the one who told me silver bullets can harm them. Flashbacks to the concentration camp in 1944 Poland. The commandante holds up a carved wooden hamsa : Inspection in the barracks made a surprise discovery - a Jewish talisman. I believe you people refer to it as “The Hand of Miriam”. It’s carved in oak that is the property of the Third Reich. Who is responsible for this fine craftsmanship? He shoots two men in the carpentry workshop until young “Abraham” confesses. The Nazi pleasantly explains: The talisman is named for the sister of Moses and Aaron and is supposed to protect from evil. After the Nazi puts him to work impressively carving a large map model, he asks “Abraham” about his roots: Where I come from everyone worked hard. We knew no other way. . .I was born in Armenia. After the Great War, my family settled in a small town in Romania. (So his family could have been Sephardic, but then he’d have called his grandmother “nona” in Ladino.) When the Nazi drunkenly recalls passing through that town in 1941, he shrugs: You take all this too personally. “Abraham”: After the murder of my family, I suppose I do. The Nazi: Ah, the nobility of the victim. Back to the present day, “Eichhorst” keeps demanding to find him again: Where is the Jew? He is here, I can smell him!
In the penultimate, “Last Rites”, teleplay by Carlton Cuse, Weddle and Thompson, the flashback is to Shkoder, Albania, 1967, “Abraham” comes home with exciting news: We’re so close this time, so close. “Miriam” (played by Adina Verson) is implied to be Jewish: Abraham, you have said these words before. He: He’s here, I know it. Victory here would validate our life’s work. And shame those who have denounced us. She takes up her crutches: Promise me, if you see signs of nesting you will get away. You should not do this alone. He: I’m never alone Miriam, you’ve been with me every step. She: Please, Abraham, do not let vengeance cloud your vision. He: I know your heart, and I now the toll my obsessions have taken on our lives and the sacrifices you have made. When we’re finished, we’ll adopt, a boy and girl, just like you’ve always wanted. She: Until sundown then. No later They kiss goodbye. But he’s delayed due to a difficult escape, so that back home, he ominously sees her crutch has been discarded, and she staggers in the door with two infected vampiric children. Praying Forgive me God for what I must do so that Miriam and all the others will not have died in vain, he not only beheads them all, but it’s her heart, pulled out of her chest, that he’s been keeping beside him all these years - Give me strength and says: Abandoning the jar, he barely escapes in time, impressing “Eichhorst”, hot on his heels, that “the Jew” abandoned all that you love. But it will not be enough. (updated 10/5/2014)

On Chasing Life (ABC Family), “Death Becomes Her” episode, written by Jeanne Leitenberg, “April” (played by Italia Ricci), the young woman just diagnosed with leukemia, shows her grandmother’s friends a photo of her out-of-town boyfriend. “Gertie” (played by Bryna Weiss): He reminds me of Willie my late husband “April”: Oh, I’m sorry. “Gertie”: Thank you bubbela. but he was old, it happens. “April”: You guys are so casual, just talking about death. “Gertie”: Oh honey, when you get to be our age you just used to it. You’ve said goodbye to so many people, it’s just part of the mishugas of life. In “What to Expect When You're Expecting Chemo” episode, written by Lisa Melamed, the grandmother “Emma” (played by Rebecca Schull) revealed that “Gertie” has a supply of marijuana for her glaucoma, that they used to bake brownies to help her granddaughter through her treatments. (I won’t know if “Gertie” references return until TWC returns to carrying episodes on demand I didn’t bother to pay $1.99 extra for it on Amazon.) (updated 8/29/2014)

Taxi Brooklyn (summer series on NBC, based on Luc Besson’s film Taxi) had TV’s favorite Jewish woman – a Jew who died in the Holocaust in the “Cherchez Les Femmes” episode, story by Franck Ollivier and Stephen Tolkin, teleplay by Ollivier, Tolkin and Gary Scott Thompson. Auschwitz survivor “Josef Wiesel” (Tom Morrissey) is beaten to death in Brooklyn. He had regularly paid women to reenact his lost love “Eva” from Hungary who died, by having them dress up in period clothes to the tune of old music, most recently with “Nadia” (Elizabeth A. Davis), who is clearly a victim of sex trafficking. His artist friend from the museum “Margarie” (Nikkie James) explained: When he told me what happened to [Eva] – such a sacrifice. . .The day Josef was going to marry Eva, the Nazis shipped all the Jews in Budapest to Auschwitz. Somehow Josef and Eva found a way to talk. They planned their escape for months. But then Eva fell and broke her leg when they tried to flee the camp. So then she acted as a decoy. She told Josef that if he really loved her he would run and live life for both of them. The last thing Josef saw when he looked back was a guard shooting Eva. The detective star of the show (Chyler Leigh) solves the mystery of the million dollars he’d finagled from the mob for a copy of Monet’s ”Camille on Her Death Bed”: Josef sacrificed his life to save his new Eva – Nadia. He sent the money to Nadia.

The Goldbergs – Beverly, Erica plus (on ABC) I feel obligated to stream each episode and transcribe it – but my forthcoming commentaries will be long rants about insufferable stereotypes of a ridiculously smothering mother, while the daughter is inconsistent. (10/8/2014)

Mrs. Wolowitz in the 8th season of Big Bang Theory (on CBS) I keep transcribing the nasty comments about her, but after trying to keep up with the transcriptions I don’t care about repeating my criticisms of the smothering stereotype, let alone all the fat jokes. But at least in the season opener, “The First Pitch Insufficiency”, teleplay by Steven Molaro, Steve Holland & Maria Ferrari, story by Chuck Lorre, Jim Reynolds, and Anthony Del Broccolo, “Stuart Bloom” (played by Kevin Sussman”, is still having a positive, if ambiguous, relationship with her, to her jealous and revolted son’s fury and disgust. But it’s just about the only times anyone has ever said anything nice about her. (updated 10/9/2014) Inside Amy Schumer – 2nd season (on Comedy Central) (10/11/2014)

Shoshanna Shapiro in the 4th season of Girls (on HBO) (10/11/2014)

Broad City – 2nd season (on Comedy Central) - in preparation, they are releasing webisodes. (10/1/2014)



Married – Jess in her 1st season (FX summer sitcom) – I made it through the whole dreadfully nasty season just to see if, per usual, Jenny Slate’s “Jess” was Jewish, what with her “old” husband “Shep” being played by Paul Reiser. (Ironically, FX’s paired sitcom You’re The Worst whose non-Jewish characters are supposed to be anti-social were actually far more appealing and amusingly worth watching than this series.) Until the finale, the only explicitly Jewish woman was in “The Old Date” episode that Slate wasn’t in, written by Daisy Gardner, the dead “Esther”. The alcoholic druggie “A.J.” (played by Brett Gelman”) gives the excuse that he’s there because: I heard Esther was a really cool lady. . .She died of titty cancer. . .I am walking for the cure this year. His friend (played by John Hodgman) points out that he was really there to see his ex-wife, because the deceased was the mother of the guy who is boning your ex-wife. I thought “A.J.” said “aunt”.
Though I didn’t transcribe her lines, or lines about her, during the season, because I wasn’t sure of even categorizing her as a putative Jewish sarcastic, coke-snorting, weed-toking, bar-flirting, working wife and mother of a toddler, when suddenly in the finale “Family Day”, teleplay by Daisy Gardner, story by Gardner and Andrew Gurland, one of her usual negative cracks against her unemployed, music manager husband at a barbecue (her father’s old friend, he told of his fantasy of death by eating brisket) had her first explicit Jewish reference: He’s just trying to eat himself out of this marriage. . .Just try not to die before the bar mitzvah. Which added Jewish resonance to first-time family references earlier in the episode, where she was the butt of remarks about her addiction to visiting people in rehab as therapy, including: Last time you came and talked for an hour complaining about how your mother makes you feel guilty because you’re not religious. Even her husband noted: She comes here because she likes the damaged men. They remind her of her father. But she closes the episode defiant to the accusatory friend: Yes, we’re trying for a second. So now when you try to make me feel bad that I’m not a good mother, you can try to make me feel twice as guilty. (updated 9/24/2014)



The Fosters – Emma in her 2nd season (on ABC Family) is being more talked about than talking for herself, particularly in “Truth Be Told”, written by Kelly Fullerton, by her ex-boyfriend “Jesus” (played by Jake T. Austin), by his sneering new girlfriend“Hayley Heinz” (played by Caitlin Carver) , and his sister “Mariana” (played by Cierra Ramirez), While the last vociferously speaks up for her, what with “Emma” relaying messages through her, not until “The Longest Day”, written by Marissa Jo Cerar, does she get to spunkily speak up for herself. Finishing up at wrestling practice, Emma (played by Amanda Leighton) gets constructive criticism from their coach: Nice, but you lost focus. “Jesus” comes over: I just want us to be cool. A seething “Emma”: I was stupid enough to think the first words out of your mouth would be I’m sorry. “Jesus”: You broke up with me! “Emma”: And you waited 5 minutes. “Jesus”: How was I supposed to know you wanted to get back together? “Emma”, strongly implying sex, but also with resonance for a Jewish teen: I’m not doing this any more! Everything’s cool. . . We both know Hayley is everything I’m not and everything I don’t want to be. I think it’s time for you to find a new tutor. He walks off with “Hayley” as “Emma” glares at them, but “Hayley” is jealous that “Emma” will be attending the team dinner too, so she manipulates “Jesus” into not going to by claiming to be really upset about her parents getting divorced. His sister later hotly lets him know she’s known about the separation for months. In the next episode, he angrily acknowledged that his sister and mother preferred “Emma” as his girlfriend. (TWC didn’t post an episode, but I didn’t bother to pay $1.99 extra for it on Amazon because Leighton wasn’t listed as appearing in it.) (updated 8/29/2014)

Transparent (on Amazon Instant Video) As the 1st season is released, there is more focus on the transgender central character than on their Jewishness. From Taffy Brodesser-Akner’s 8/29/2014 New York Times Magazine interview: “Can Jill Soloway Do Justice to the Trans Movement?” In 2011 her short “film got into Sundance. A week later, Soloway’s father called her to come out as transgender. . . Transparent is not overtly autobiographical. The show is at least an equal product of Soloway’s own creative struggle with gender identity as it is of actual family history.” be considering a Jewish father becoming a Jewish mother. (8/29/2014)

Manhattan – Abigail Isaacs (on WGN and Hulu) The first episode, “You Always Hurt the One You Love” written by Sam Shaw, set in 1942 “766 days before Hiroshima”, established that for the husband scientists working to develop the top secret atom bomb: This is Shangri-La. The highest combined IQ of any town in the country and we have more Jews than Babylon, reminding me of the anecdotes in the autobiography Surely You're Joking, Mr. Feynman, as in Richard. But where are the other Jews? None of the wives seemed Jewish at first, until it was gradually made clear that “Abigail Isaacs” (played by Rachel Brosnahan) was Jewish because we first saw her on the long dry, dusty road to New Mexico, with their young son, nagging her husband “Charlie” (played by Ashley Zukerman) to stay east and work for her well-to-do father. She gave more of an implication, in the 2nd episode “Prisoner’s Dilemma” by Shaw, while she was outside scrubbing, with her hair in rollers, and explains to her neighbor why she’s tearfully trying so hard to clean up:My grandmother tatted these curtains. They survived all the way from Russia. . . I put a pot of coffee on and the next thing I know the house is on fire. (While folks online are pointing out dialog anachronisms, I had to look up the old-fashioned word tatting.) Her husband is surprising her by getting as frisky as on their honeymoon, outside -- There’s no grass stains in the desert. -- and inside, where she’s nervous about the thin dorm walls barely separating from her neighbors, who I’m not sure yet if any of those other wives or female scientists are Jewish.
The series’ website describes her background: “Abby Isaacs grew up in a secular Jewish household in the suburban bubble of Brookline, Massachusetts. When Charlie declined his father-in-law’s offer of a sales job with the family business, he caused a rift with Abby’s family that remains unrepaired. Abby remains loyal to Charlie and takes pride in the idea that he is special. She and Charlie share almost no interests other than their son, but they have fun together. Abby is a good, if indulgent, mother to her child. Cultured and naturally social, Abby is still a newcomer, discovering by trial-and-error the very strange rules and taboos that govern life at Los Alamos.”
In “The Hive” written by Nathaniel Halpern and Lisa Melamed stuck in some awkward Jewish references, to both Isaacs’s. Sitting around with the other women admiring hunky enlisted men washing their dusty cars, “Abby” is asked if she got her work credential yet. She: Running after a 6 year old is enough work of me. . .I don’t know how to do anything. An older woman insists: Gladys is expecting a visit from the stork. You can take over her job. You seem like a very good listener. Later her husband’s reaction: I just never thought we’d be a 2 income family. She: At 40 cents an hour? It’s more like 1 income and some pocket change. If Daddy found out I was getting a job he’d keel over. He: We should call him and tell him! You’re a modern woman, I think it’s sexy! -- and slaps her on the butt. She: They haven’t hired me yet. I have to pass an exam and you know I don’t test well. [Another woman] failed it and she has a PhD. I heard that’s why she doesn’t work. He mutters that it’s not that kind of exam and it’s her husband who failed. To her: If I didn’t know better Mrs. Isaacs, I’d think you actually want this job. She: I don’t want the job, I want them to want me for the job. Turns out her job interview for a phone operator is a lie detector test. Among the questions and answers: How many alcoholic beverages do you consume in a week? A little Manishewitz at Passover. What are your assets? $900 in bank, a car. And there’s a separate trust in my name, about $200,000. The polygraph operator is more surprised at that answer than the next ones about ever having been arrested and charged with a crime or felony: Yes. I borrowed my piano teacher’s Studebaker. It was a misunderstanding. She dropped the charges. Have you ever had relations with a man outside your marriage? No. She gets to report to woman supervisor: You passed with flying colors! It’s just like Harvard -- getting in is the hardest part. . . You get to learn all your neighbors’ dirty laundry She’s all enthusiastic to her distracted husband while serving dinner: What did you do at work today? Trick question! You’re not allowed to answer!
In “Last Reasoning of Kings”, written by Scott Brown, “Abby” has gotten daring and frisky. An announcement comes over the public address system for her husband – it was her daring for what would later be called afternoon delight on her lunch hour: Charlie Isaacs report to me. She pushes him up against the wall over his protests all he needs to do She: Tell me about [Niels] Bohr and your work. She pulls down his pants, then him down into the corner. She gets all excited on top of him during sex on the floor as he talks on about electrons. Later, she’s excited to get all dolled up for the reception for Bohr, but he’s depressed from a conflict with Oppenheimer doesn’t want to go. She: Stick to physics. You have no future in comedy. . .My father wanted me to marry someone from East Egg, not East St. Louis, I told him ‘Charlie is a genius’. The truth is I didn’t think you were a genius. I didn’t know what you were until we got here and I saw the way people who everyone else calls a genius looks at you. . .We’re going to that party and we’re going to fix everything with that man who may be running everything. And a kiss of encouragement.
“A New Approach to Nuclear Cosmology”, written by Mark Lafferty and Noelle Valdivia, the Isaacs are now both turned on by their work and are having a lusty round of sex in bed in the opening scene, with her on top, as the radio plays a romantic song. In a post-coital cuddle, she teases about his secret, and he teases her about “technique”. She thinks the project is winding down; he warns It’s just getting started. She jokes she’s a switchboard girl who’s going to get a Nobel Peace Prize, to which he grins into more sex. But at work, her sneeze gives away that she’s listening in a call by a top scientist “Frank Winter” (played by John Benjamin Hickey), who sardonically tells her “Gezunheit” when they pass in the hall. Later, he tricks her with a misleading call to his father that upsets her so much she leaves work early to confront her husband: You would never steal something would you? He jokes: Just stealing you away from the most eligible Jewish bachelors in Brookline. She: You would never cheat? and she tells him “Winter” claimed he plagiarized his scientific research and he reassures her that he didn’t: I would never even cheat on my taxes. When he confronts “Winter” not to talk to him through his wife again, it turns out there was a debatable borrowing of a concept in one paragraph: My wife wouldn’t even look me in the eye last night. But after this blackmail to lie to an investigator (and his being Jewish was frequently referred to in their suspicions), they share a sleepless night.
In “Acceptable Limits”, written by producer Dustin Thomason, the couple is full of insinuations. “Charlie” is getting checked by a doctor with an alarmingly noisy Geiger counter: Thought we only got poked and prodded once a month. I see more of you than I do my wife these days. By the time he comes home after work, the electricity has gone out and, to his consternation, she’s reading by candlelight,: I lied. I told you I read your paper. I picked it up 10 times last year, but I never got past the first paragraph. I want to finish. . .This part about bending light waves – is that like a prism? We had one in school. He: Abby put it away. You’re never going to let it go? She: I just wanted to read it. He: Is this about Winter? Ever since you got that call you haven’t looked at me the same. She: That’s ridiculous. He: I’m not like your father. I don’t have a trust fund. I guess that means I cheated my way in, right? She: You’re the only person I know who thinks a decent upbringing is something to be ashamed of. He: I’m going on a trip. I don’t know when I’m coming back. You’ll have plenty of time to catch up on your reading. When she cleverly investigates that he’s traveling with a female physicist, she is curt at work to his lonely phone call from his Oak Ridge, TN hotel.
In “The New World”, written by Lilya Byock and Dustin Thomason, they are both experimenting. She reveals her jealousy to co-worker “Elodie” (played by Carole Weyers), who is earthily supportive: If your husband prefers hamburger to filet, he deserves an empty stomach. While “Abby” also confesses to overhearing her noisy sex through their thin party walls, she jokes about faking orgasms: I only get to the top of that hill climbing alone. “Abby” reluctantly agrees go to a noisy bar on the other side of town in a sexy dress and be slyly introduced as a WAC from the base. The co-worker teases her hesitation: They don’t have Negro music at the Brooklyn Country Club? She corrects to: Brookline. She at first demurs Prohibition-era 80% proof alcohol, but a soldier teases her into drinking it: Oh I thought you were an Army girl? They jitterbug and he gets very handsy. When she gets pretty drunk, he leads her off the dance floor and against the wall for a whole lot more necking than she’s ready for. “Elodie” rescues her just in time to take her home to bed– and then kisses her. And “Abby” kisses her back. They make out quite a bit on the bed. She wakes at noon naked and hung over – and, along with her maid, sees that the other side of the bed was slept in. Meanwhile, he too is getting a bit drunk and confesses to his colleague that his father is really in the state pen: Why am I telling you that? My wife doesn’t even know. He comes home from his frustrating nuclear experiment with a big I love you Abby. She hugs him right where she conducted her sexual experiment, but he has to go back to the office.
“The Second Coming”, written by Sam Shaw and David Thomason, dealt with American Jews and the Holocaust from a sensitive, creative perspective I haven’t seen on TV before. “Charlie” is surprised to catch “Abby” leaving work from the early shift. He wants her to “punch back in”, but she’s excited to be sneaking off for a day trip to Santa Fe. He insists on an important favor for her to do: You can shop tomorrow. Santa Fe can wait. She sputters: I’m not shopping. I know you won’t approve, but I’m going to go see Mother and Daddy. He’s sarcastic: Your parents live in Massachusetts. She: I got a letter. They’re going to a millinery convention in Los Angeles on the California Limited and it stops in Santa Fe. I’m going to surprise them. He’s taken back by her initiative: Jesus Abby. She’s determined: I’m going to ride one stop, 72 minutes, I’ll get off the train and I’ll take the bus back. I know it’s against the Army rules, and I know we can get in trouble. He: Fine, but before you go I need for you to arrange an out-going telephone call. She agrees, but he insists on conditions: With no one listening – not even you. But she does listen in and is a bit suspicious. On the train, she surprised her parents with a knock on their compartment, but she’s just as surprised that her mother “Miriam Rubins” (played by Jessica Hecht) weeps over her grandson. Her father “Maxwell Rubins” (played by Robin Thomas Grossman) shows her the letters from the old country that first begged for food and help, and have now stopped coming altogether. “Abby” is confused, and resentful: So this is Aunt Esther’s family? Father, with an Eastern European accent: Esther is on my side, sweetheart. The Pearlmans are your mother’s cousins, back in Minsk. She’s still confused: With the textile factory? Father: We thought they’d all made it out, but that letter arrived just before we left home -- Malka and her little girl, got left behind. Mother is very upset: The postmark was from June. Now the whole ghetto has been “liquidated”. What kind of word is that? It’s like a sale at Filene’s. “Abby”: What are they doing in the ghetto to begin with? Aren’ t they very well to do? Father: We have half of Washington trying to get information. “Abby”: You’re always warning me about jumping to conclusions. I’m sure your cousins will turn up sooner or later. Mother, bitterly: Probably in a shallow grave! “Abby” is shocked, looking at her son: Little children have big ears. Mother: I hope he’s listening! Children need to know what kind of world we’re living in that treats good Jews like poultry! Your father sheltered you too much! Father: Let it go Miriam. Mother sneers at “Abby”: You could never stand any ugliness. “Abby” retorts: Forgive me if I’m not interested in gloomy gossip about people I never even met. You haven’t seen Joey in six months and this is how you want to spend our time together? Mother: Is it our fault that we haven’t seen you? Angry silence and glares all around, and dad guzzles a drink. “Abby” tries changing the subject: Joey’s going to be in a holiday pageant. He’s playing the little lamb in the manger. Father: He’s Jewish. “Abby”: Well, so was Jesus. And I know you won’t believe it, Daddy, but Charlie has been an absolute star at work. Father: And what is his work exactly? “Abby”: You know I can’t talk about it. But a lot of very smart and important people seem to think that Charlie’s going to help end the war. Mother: Maybe Charlie can help us, he’s got such an important government job. Maybe he can find out where they’ve got Malka, arrange some kind of special visa. I don’t know what, we’ll pay whatever it costs! Father: My love, there is nothing that Charlie can do. “Abby” notes she has to get off in 18 minutes, at Albuquerque. Father protests: You’re getting off? We have a suite in Pasadena. “Abby”: If they even knew that I was here. And there’s a knock on the door from a soldier: Mrs. Isaacs would you please come with me -- now. She’s brought in for questioning by a Colonel: Mrs. Isaacs, this is a serious infraction. I would think a switchboard operator would know security regulations chapter and verse. She’s nervous: Absolutely sir. I do. He admonishes her: A day pass to Santa Fe is not a ticket to California. She: I wasn’t going to California, just to Albuquerque. He: Mrs. Isaacs, you and your husband are having a marital dispute? She thinks fast and starts crying: Sir, it’s nothing like that. There has been a terrible tragedy. I don’t know if you heard what’s happened in Minsk? I have family there, my cousin Malka, she’s really more like a sister to me.. She weeps into his proffered handkerchief: I know it was wrong to sneak off like that, but I was trying to help my family through a difficult time and I’m prepared to accept my punishment. He: There have to be consequences. She sniffles, as we see the private play with her toddler just outside the office: My poor cousin Malka. I used to send her hand-me-downs every year. I guess there’s no need for those dresses wherever the Nazis have taken her! It’s just so hard not knowing! If only we had some answers! He: All right, given the circumstantces, we can let bygones be bygones. Go home and get some rest Mrs. Isaacs. But there’s a knock on her door at home and she’s sarcastic to the private: So much for bygones - are you here to arrest me? My son is asleep and I don’t have a sitter. Instead, the private, with an Irish-sounding name, asks to come in and tells a long story about a Jewish man from his hometown who was helpful to his father: I know how important family is in the Hebrew faith. I file the intelligence reports – here’s everything we know about the situation in the area where your people are. You said not knowing was the hardest part. The Bible says the Lord rained fire on Sodom and Gomorroh. I don’t know what’s going to rain on Berlin. She opens the file, and is still sitting in shock when her husband walks in expecting dinner. She says matter of factly: My cousins are dead. . .The Pearlmans on my mother’s side. He: Were you close? She: No, I never met them. If I’d seen them on the street I would have walked right past them. He: Were they in an accident or? She tears up: No, they live in Europe. I don’t see how they could have escaped with a toddler. Did you know that in Minsk the Germans allow each Jew one and half square meters of living space, the adults I mean. The children were marched into the forest and buried alive. He: Where did you hear that? She: There’s more than a million people missing. Like they just vanished off the face of the earth. I don’t even know how to think of a number like that. He: You shouldn’t be thinking about that stuff. Her weeping turns to anger: Why? Because I’m too fragile to stomach the truth? He: No, because there’s no point getting worked up when there’s nothing you can do about it. She asks about his suspicious phone call she had listened to: You’re right, I can’t do anything about what’s happening over there – but you can. She hands him the file, and he pulls out the photographs of women and children being rounded up at the points of guns. He overcomes his paranoid nightmare of his boss mocking him as a Jew, and barges in to tell him of the problem with the bomb design. (In the meantime, “Abby” got a package of the return of her bra from her female lover.)
In “Spooky Action at a Distance”, written by Mark Lafferty, “Abby” is again being seduced by her neighbor “Elodie” (Carole Weyers), while they sunbathe. “Abby”: Was it normal? What happened between us the other night? “Elodie”: You Americans, always looking for explanations, for penance, What do you think happened? You fell asleep. “Abby”: Yes, but before I fell asleep. “Elodie” goes on about her first man she made love to – then strokes “Abby”s hand: Secrets, Cherie, without them we would just be normal. While it’s not clear where her son has gotten off to, “Abby” is getting drunk in “Elodie”s Christmas-tree-filled living room. “Elodie” leans in for a kiss: You think too much about should. -- but they’re interrupted by the husband “Tom Lansfield” (Josh Cooke), who insists “Abby” stay for dinner, and takes off his wife’s Josephine Baker record for an upbeat American pop song. They all get drunker, then while the wife goes for another bottle, he pushes “Abby” down in her chair and feels up her breast: I want to know you better. I do know you. You can keep a secret. He sticks his hand up her skirt and leers: As soon as Charlie slips up I’ll be waiting. She reports on what he said to her angry husband: What do you mean he touched you? She: You know what I mean. He groped me. He said something about he sees what you’re doing and he’s waiting for you to slip up and --. But he just walks away silently. She: You have to do something! He: Like what? She:I don’t know. He shrugs: Men will be men. The best thing you can do is stay out of his way. Taken aback, she goes off to smoke a cigarette in their bedroom.
“The Understudy”, written by Tom Spezialy, paralleled “Abby” and “Elodie”s relationship with their husbands’ work, as it opened with them lolling on a picnic blanket, oblivious to the radiation that another of the wives is increasingly paranoid about. But then “Abby” is pulling herself together after enjoying oral sex. “Elodie”: How long has it been since your husband did that?. . .You don’t have to wear so much make-up. You’re beautiful withou it. “Abby”: My mother always said a girl should never leave the house without lipstick unless it’s in a coffin. “Elodie”: Love affairs are the rewards for putting up with our husbands. “Abby”: We’re not having an affair. “Elodie”: You don’t have to feel guilty for taking pleasure in life. “Annie” demurs from her dinner invitation: Not much pleasure the last time I had dinner at your house. Your husband put his hands all over me. . .Practically assaulted me. “Elodie” tries to kiss her: I’ll kill him! I’ll poison his dinner! “Annie” lies to her: If I wanted to make a production out of it I would have told Charlie. I don’t know what he would have done. Later they meet up at a bar, smoking together. “Elodie”: This is awfully public. “Annie”: Yes that’s why I wanted to meet here, so there’s no misunderstanding my intentions. . You have been a wonderful friend at a time when I really needed one. But whatever you think is happening between us, it needs to end. I’m sorry. “Elodie”: Is this about what Tom did? “Annie”: No, this is about you and me. They’re interrupted by a drunk couple they know from work. The guy leers to “Abby”: Does your husband know you’re out on the town with this minx? The woman returns to “Elodie” her copy of Albert Camus’s L’Etranger (The Stranger) because she’s disappointed: I thought it would be racier. “Elodie” starts in: Oh, he certainly set Europe on fire. “Abby” interrupts: I thought that was Hitler.What's the book about? “Elodie” interrupts the plot description: It's about the fact that our lives are absurd. There's no God. There's no morality. And society invents rules to keep us from happiness. But every minute of every day you're free to decide who to be and how to live. “Abby”: Sounds like the author never lived in this town where you can’t leave. “Elodie”: He lives in occupied Paris. . .You’re free to walk away. . .Just because there’s a consequence doesn’t mean you have no choice. “Abby” is confused and shocked by the “bon vivant” couple’s invitation for a threesome. “Elodie” defends everyone having a secret life, especially here: Abby, you've been on the switchboard long enough to know that everybody inside these fences has a secret life. You're no exception. The difference is you’re keeping your’s secret even from yourself. . .Why shouldn’t we enjoy ourselves while we can? Life is short and it’s getting shorter all the time. . .That’s why we’re here. So our husbands can invent the end of the world. In the morning, “Abby” surprises her husband by sitting and reading the book in her pajamas: You woke up early. She retorts, after all he had been flirting with another scientist: You got home late. He: What's for breakfast? She: Nothing. He: Nothing? She: I'm not hungry. Why would I eat? He: Because that's what people do in the morning. He notices the book and tries to sound out the title, which she corrects: I took four years of high school French. He’s sarcastic: You buy gossip magazines for the photo spreads. Suddenly you're reading Baudelaire? She challenges him: You're not building a radar system, are you?. . .That's what you told me when we first got here. Is it true? He: Abby, it's complicated. She: Lying to your wife? He: I can't tell you any more. I'm not allowed. She: Of course you can. In every single moment, we have a choice. He: I'm protecting you. She: By building some machine that could wipe us all off the face of the earth? He stalks off to the kitchen: I'll make my own breakfast. She returns the book to “Elodie”: Already finished? “Abby”: Do you know why I learned French? Because it was important to my mother. Every August Charlie and I spent our vacation in Chatham, the same place that I've been summering since I was a little girl. It never occurred to me to go someplace new. “Elodie”: Well, you deserve to see the world. “Abby”: My whole life I have been exactly the person everyone expected me to be. I don't even know what I want. “Elodie: What do you want right now? “Abby” smiles seductively, leads her into the bedroom, and “Elodie” closes the door behind them. (updated 10/16/2014)

In the Face of Crime (Im Angesicht des Verbrechens) (2010 German mini-series released on DVD in the U.S. in 2014 by MHZ Networks, in their “International Mystery Series”) Looking forward to watching Dominik Graf’s noir set in the Russian-Jewish community in Germany. (9/30/2014)

The Honourable Woman – Nessa Stein and more (in U.K. on BBC2; in U.S. on Sundance Channel) The mini-series premiere first in the U.K. led to advance commentary about a character that the press is characterizing as “Anglo-Israeli”. Quoted in The New York Times, “Adding Fiction to the Fray Making Dramas About Mideast Can Be Complicated”, by Dave Itzkoff, 7/28/2014: “Sarah Barnett, the president and general manager of Sundance TV, said that her network had signed onto the series on the basis of [Hugo] Blick’s scripts, even before [Maggie]. Gyllenhaal had agreed to star. “Nessa Stein was someone we just hadn’t seen represented in a scripted drama before. She was this extraordinarily compelling character, and her life of privilege was such a double-edged sword — such a prison, in a way.” First noting that the actress’s mother is Jewish, Andrew Anthony in the U.K. The Observer, 7/5/2014, elicited this discussion: “Her one doubt about the UK is the way she says that Jewishness is treated here. ‘It was a culture shock for me. In America, we don't expect there to be any social difference [between Jews and non-Jews]. I don't seem Jewish, I don't have a Jewish name. [She since revealed on a U.S. chat show that she had recently learned the name on her birth certificate is “Margalit”.] No one would ever know. But when I came here people started talking in a different way about what it meant to be Jewish. People would talk about specific areas of London being Jewish, about Jewish ways of behaving.’ Nessa does have a Jewish name, but otherwise no one would ever know. Who she really is and what she really wants remain for the time being a mystery. Over the rest of the summer, all eyes will be on the enigmatic Gyllenhaal as the truth is slowly and no doubt perplexingly revealed.” On public radio’s Studio 360 , 8/8/2014, Blick noted the differences in British and American audiences’ perceptions.

Rachel Berry etc. in the 6th/final season of Glee (on Fox) Before the premiere, it’s worth noting the context in this interview with her idol: “Barbra Streisand: A Voice to Be Reckoned With”, by Jared Bernstein, in The New York Times, 9/14/2014: “She believes many of the journalists who have swiped her over the years are anti-Semitic or anti-female, even when (or especially when) those critics are Jewish or female — or both. Mike Wallace once did a tough interview with her for CBS. ‘He had this very powerful Jewish mother, and I thought ‘Whoa!’” she said. ‘After Yentl, Ms. Streisand continued, ‘the most vitriolic reviews I got were from women, who never discussed what I was saying in the movie in terms of a celebration of womanhood and the fact that they could have babies and be smart and study and be scholars, that they could do the whole thing. It was all about the costumes, the lighting, the lip-syncing. Things that are trivial.’ Recently, she has been using a spiral notebook to write down her thoughts on Israel, some of which may go into a memoir she’s writing. A paragraph in it began as follows: ‘The world envies success.’” (updated 9/14/2014)

Felicity Smoak in the 3rd season of Arrow (on CW) An “Olicity” date was teased to fans on FaceBook:

2013/2014 Season

I’m relieved that none of the idiot rich women employers on the satirical Devious Maids (on Lifetime) are Jewish, but the “Minding the Baby” episode, written by Gloria Calderon Kellett, stuck in a bitchy comment when two housewives bumped into each other: “Joan”: Not since the Stein bat mitzvah. Such an unfortunate looking girl. What a pretty venue. (8/12/2013)

On Maron, a semi-autobiographical comedy on IFC, comic/podcaster Marc Maron constantly whines about being Jewish. But when we’ve seen his mother “Toni” (played by Sally Kellerman), as in “The Mom Situation”, written by Luke Methany, there’s no reference nor evidence that she’s Jewish, though last season Judd Hirsch played his father “Larry”, just as he frequently on TV plays a Jewish father not married to a Jewish woman. (6/15/2014)

In Murdoch Mysteries (The Artful Detective) (Canadian series, set in 1890’s Toronto, shown a couple of years later in the U.S. on Ovation channel), “War on Terror” episode by Peter Mitchell, originally from 2012, featured a visit from the anarchist “Emma Goldman”. But while she was stressing she was against violence amidst the bombing investigation, there was not only zero reference to her ethnic background, Lisa Norton played her with a muddled accent that was closer to Irish than Yiddish. (5/12/2014)

Brookly Nine-Nine (on Fox) is yet another New York set sit com with a male Jewish character, “Detective Jake Peralta” (played by Andy Samberg), yet it took until the 17th episode for even a sort of mention of a Jewish woman, in “Full Boyle” written by Norm Hiscock and Gil Ozeri. As wing man on a double date, “Jake” is surprised by how much he has in common with “Bernice” (Amanda Lund), the woman he’s supposed to ignore in order to help his colleague with her friend: And this beautiful basketball-loving, Die Hard fan is tearing down my wall of my defenses! If we find out she is also half-Jewish, we’re doomed! All season, not even his memories of his bar mitzvah included any Jewish girls. (updated 5/1/2014)

In The League (sitcom on FX) Lizzy Caplan first appeared as the Orthodox Jew “Rebecca Ruxin” in the episodes “The 8 Defensive Points of Hanukkah” and “Baby Geoffrey Jesus”, both written by Jeff Schaffer and Jackie Marcus Schaffer, that I haven’t viewed yet. (Thanks to Eliav Levy for the citation) (10/5/2014)

On Awkward (MTV), “Karmic Relief”, written by Erin Ehrlich, the central character “Jenna Hamilton” (Ashley Rickards) is trying to convince her dad the $750 prom dress she wants will be re-worn on other occasions as well: And bar-mitzvahs. He’s quizzical. Her mother (played by Nikki Deloach) tries to be helpful: The girl kind of bar mitzvahs? Dad walks away. Later, when she can’t unzip her new dress, she claims to the guy she thinks will be inviting her to prom that she is on her way to a bar mitzvah at 10 pm: It’s at midnight. That crazy kid turns 13 and just couldn’t wait. (12/16/2013)

On Bad Teacher (quickly cancelled CBS sitcom, based on the movie I haven’t seen), “The Bottle”, written by Jamie Rhonheimer, “Meredith Davis” (played by Ari Graynor) reunites with her old Mean Girl friends for her 30th birthday. The Queen Bee is reminded that she already used the excuse of an implant rupturing to get out of going to a bat mitzvah. But watching the last two episodes weren’t enough to figure out if either the titular divorcee or her old or her country club friends were Jewish. (8/16/2014)

On The Good Wife, “A Few Words” episode, written by Leonard Dick, the quirky recurring defense attorney “Elsbeth Tascioni” (played by Carrie Preston) is upset by a costumed furry bear in Times Square who agrees to a hug but keeps repeating: Dirty stinking Jew.. She warns other pedestrians Watch out for that bear – he’s anti-Semitic! and muttering I’m not a dirty stinking Jew. We certainly have never had any hint she’s even Jewish. (3/24/2014)

Elementary, the CBS version of “Sherlock Holmes”, had a gratuitous reference to a Jewish woman on the “All in the Family” episode written by Jason Tracey. This version of “Watson”, “Dr. Joan” (played by Queens native Lucy Liu), figures out, based on zero evidence, that the victim’s nickname of “Mutt” is the Italian gangster’s reference to his mixed parentage: His mother was from Israel. In the Jewish faith, the dead are supposed to be buried as quickly as possible. “Sherlock” (played by Jonny Lee Miller) muses that the killer was an avenging angel.
In the “Hound of the Cancer Cells” episode written by Bob Goodman, “Dalit Zirin” (played by Shiri Appleby) admits she was lying to “Sherlock Holmes” queries: I’m not a travel agent. I’m Mossad. . . .The part about me and Barry [Granger, played by Jason Danieley] meeting in college was true, Columbia. Barry was pre-med. I was computer science.. “Holmes” for some reason asks: Your citizenship? She: Dual. I was raised here, but my parents are Israeli. . I’m here because I care about Barry. He was my friend and because you left me very little choice. . . Barry and I were in a relationship when I was first recruited, but I told him no, he was asking me to break multiple laws. When I heard what happened to Barry I felt terrible about turning him away. So after his death, she breaks those laws to get the information to “Holmes”, though “Watson” is suspicious. (4/15/2014)

On The Mindy Project (on NBC), in the “An Officer and a Gynecologist” episode written by Jack Burditt and Lang Fisher, who I think are the sitcom’s first Jewish women are briefly seen at a shabbos dinner looking quizzically at “Dr. Danny Castellano” (played by Chris Messina) awkwardly pretending to be the Jewish “Dr. Schulman”. The rebbitzen “Dora Adler” (played by Suzanne Ford), flanked by her adult daughters, asks Is there a Mrs. Shulman?. “Peter Prentice” (played by Adam Pally) distracts her by pretending to be more observant than his secular upbringing by pouring on compliments about her cooking and good looks. She kvells: What a charmer! They are all shocked when the lies are exposed, but the father “Rabbi David Adler” (played by Peter MacNichol with a beard so fake that, as “Mindy” says makes him look like a Civil War general) later shrugs: My family will be telling the story for years of the goy and the Jew with the baggy shmekel. (5/18/2014)

On Black Box (on ABC), the “Jerusalem” episode, written by Oanh Ly and series creator Amy Holden-Jones, seemed to reflect the attitudes towards Jews of co-producer Ilene Chaiken from her other works. A rich Jewish board member of the psychiatric facility “Jacob Myers” (played by Michael Kostroff) is brought in from his penthouse for evaluation by his wife “Tracey” (played by Susan Pourfar), complaining he’s been spouting Biblical verses: This morning he gave away millions and our house. . .He’s bonkers! We’ve always been bad Jews. I can count on one hand the number of times we’ve been to temple. All of a sudden. . . .Ever since we came back from vacation. Her husband interrupts: It was not a vacation.! It was aliyah to Israel. She continues: We went shopping in Tel Aviv, swam in the Dead Sea, spa treatment. It was wonderful. Then we went to the Wailing Wall. . .he was on his knees. . It was very scary actually. He smiles beatifically: The closest to heaven I ever felt. The diagnoses “Jerusalem Syndrome”, but the wife is unconvinced: Something is wrong. It makes no sense. Jacob always rebelled against his parents’ religion. Doctor: Are his parents Orthodox? Wife: Oh yes, hard core. The doctor claims there’s a specific gene for religiosity. Maybe your trip to Jerusalem triggered something in him that was already there. The wife: I always knew his parents wld ruin our marriage. She challenges the diagnosis that everyting is fine and gets really angry as he keeps davenning: That’s awful! There’s nthing you can fix? Look at him! Is that man sane? I have nowhere to go! He gave away our house! This is not what I signed up for! You were supposed to take care of me! Not me you! I gave up my career because of you! I can’t even get groceries! How is that sane! Jacob, if you ever loved me, stop! Stop! Stop! The doctor finally recognizes his condition as correctable epileptic psychosis, and the wife tearfully convinces him to take the medication, though it means he will no longer hear God. Later in his hospital room, she kisses his head as he’s busy texting and fighting a hostile take-over. The happy wife: Hear that? I have my baby back! As it turns out, we still have a home. Our lawyer says if you’re psychotic and you give away everything you own, it doesn’t count!. . .We’re thinking what this place needs is a donor wall. . . “For more details see your local priest or rabbi.” The doctor promotes that he should go forth and make money for charity: If you wander the world with a begging bowl, who would that benefit? The wife blows a kiss to the hunky doctor with a grin: Nobody! (6/23/2014)

Call the Midwife (on PBS, out on DVD) had the familiar Masterpiece Theatre Jewish women as Holocaust survivors in 1950’s London, in Season 3, Episode 4, written by Gabbie Asher and Heidi Thomas. While the Jewish characters are not recalled in the memoirs by Jennifer Worth, subtitled A True Story of the East End in the 1950s, that are the primary basis for the series, the producers have also drawn on interviews with other midwives from that period.
Pregnant ”Leah Moss” (played by Orion Ben) comes in for a check-up with a midwives, but leaves quickly to return to care for her mother despite symptoms that portend a difficult birth. Her mother “Mrs. Sarahla Rubin” (played by Beverley Klein) is down on the floor: I’m sorry I was so long. I was waiting and waiting. Not again! We’ll wait until it passes. Her husband “Charlie” (played by Ilan Goodman) comes home with: herring and schmaltz and cream cheese I know you’ve been craving these. And news about the deli manager: is moving to Israel and the deli has an apartment and a garden for the little one. It’s our chance to get out of the East End. “Leah”: What about my mother? “Charlie”: Take her to a doctor, Leah! She: I won’t even discuss it, Charlie! He: It’s 12 years since she left this flat! “Leah”: You think I don’t feel as trapped as she is? Do you think I want to be stuck here? Imprisoned in this house of ghosts? He: Talk to her Leah, talk to her. The midwife and nun come to check up on “Leah”: Sorry, I had to come home. My mother doesn’t like being left alone for too long. Mother: That’s my fault. I make work for her. “Leah” She has attacks. . .Dizzy spells. Mama assures she won’t fall: It’s gornishe, nothing. . .I don’t go outside, so that will not happen. . . The attacks they come and they go. . . As mother and daughter hold hands, “Leah”: There’s no need for doctor. She just needs peace and quiet. Mother: Peace and quiet I get at home.. She sets the the Shabbat dinner table and assures the midwife: Don’t worry Sister, I do all the housework today. Not only is it our Shabbos soon, it is also the Festival of Shavuot. . . .The day I make cheesecake! . . A recipe from. . . (I couldn’t catch the reference.) As the nun prattles on about the Book of Ruth, the mother has an attack and falls to the floor. “Leah” warns against calling a doctor, but the nun insists: I’m going to call the doctor, for your mother’s sake and for your baby’s. The doctor asks for descriptions of her physical symptoms, but “Leah” finally describes her other history: She hasn’t set foot outside this flat for 12 years. . . .Please don’t take her away. I know she’s lost her mind, but I know I can look after her. . . During the war, Mother and I were in a Nazi ghetto. A miracle happened, and we escaped. We lived in a cellar until it was safe. When we returned home, our families and friends were gone. Soon after we moved to London and these attacks start. You see now? But the doctor takes an unusual approach to a survivor: I’m not going to take your mother anywhere. You’ve lost enough. She’s lost enough. But we need to get to the bottom of what ails her. “Leah”: I told you it’s her mind that ails her. Doctor: Not necessarily. It’s possible that we may be looking at a form of vertigo, something called Ménière's Disease. It’s a problem with the inner ear. . . And there are medications we can try. A fear of leaving home is common with Ménière's sufferers. It may be that everyting’s related. “Leah”: So if you treat her ear she’ll be able to go outside? Doctor: There’s every reason for optimism. “Leah”: After 12 years I can hardly believe it. Her mother, too, is quite surprised: A problem with my ear? And it can be mended? “Leah”: The doctor believes so. It means you can leave the house, Mama. It means you don’t need to be scared anymore. As they sit down to Shabbat dinner, the couple tells mama the news about the shop. “Leah”: We’ve been talking of leaving for the north west London. . .There’s a shop in Golders Green. “Charlie”: And there’s a flat, with room for all of us! Nervous mother: I see, so much news you give me, and all in one evening. Today is Shabbos. On Sunday we start packing. The women cover their heads and “Leah” lights the Shabbat candles. Mama lies awake at night, as the couple happily discuss their plans for the future. The next day the nun comes to help get Mama out of the house, with a long-winded farm story. Mama: You think I’m an altacatcher. You think I don’t know what you’re doing? Coming into my house and calling me a horse! The nun changes tactics: How about this story? It’s about heroine called Sarahla Rubin who fought and beat the most evil humans in human history and who saved her daughter’s life. Mother: Who left her family and friends behind? Some heroine! Nun: Listen to me - you are a warrior, Mrs. Rubin! You can fight this! Take my arm! Take it! They get to the door but the mother panics and staggers back. But “Leah” goes into her difficult labor, and mother and nun have to manage on their own to birth a baby girl. “Leah” coos: Hello, I’m your mummy! Her mother: She looks like you! They all bond, and the mother later proudly tells the nun: They named her yesterday at the synsagouge – Elizabeth. She touches an old family photo, opens the door, touches the mezuzah, goes out on the balcony, calls down to “Leah”: What you want to bring the baby out in that thin shmatta? She’ll catch pneumonia. She goes down the stairs and out into the street, with “Leah” in tears at seeing her outside. Her mother grins and looks all around, first at the baby and Leah, breathes deeply, and goes up to the midwife whose boyfriend just died: Just the person I was coming to see. I heard about your loss. We wish you long life. . . You know, this bit of London doesn’t smell so good. In Golders Green I think it will be better. “Leah: We’re moving next week, all of us. Mama: You will think I’m mishgunnah, but I have a thing about goodbyes. I didn’t have a chance with so many of my own, but now I like to make sure it’s done proper. So I say goodbye. The mourning midwife weeps: I didn’t get the chance to say goodbye. “Leah”: You’ve said enough. Run along and leave her in peace. The Grandmother has an unusual perspective: What peace can she know now? You will feel better than this, bubbelah. Maybe not yet, but you will. . .Yes, you just keep living until you are alive again. (updated 6/23/2014)

In Fargo, the prequel to the Coen brothers’ movie (on FX) that is a pitch-perfect very dark comedy with way off-kilter characters, a Jewish woman first appears in “The Rooster King”, written by Noah Hawley. Parked in front of the apartment building of Duluth deputy “Gus Grimly” (played by Colin Hanks) is an RV of “Chabad Lubavitch of Minnesota – Mitzvah Tank – Your Resource for Anything Jewish – Sharing Faith”, decorated with a portrait of some Rebbe, Shabbat candles, a torah and a menorah. (I’m amused that recappers don’t realize there really are several such chapters, including Chabad Lubavitch of Northern Minnesota, and I have cousins working in such distant outreach.) Across the courtyard, he is teased by an Orthodox woman (“Rachel Ziskind” played by Leah Cairns) who tantalizingly undresses by the open window, starting by taking off her wig, and opens her dress to brazenly show him lacy lingerie before joining her kippah-wearing husband and daughter at their dining room table. In “The Six Ungraspables”, written by Hawley, the husband “Ari” (played by Byron Noble) is awake in the middle of the night and comes over to tell the equally insomniac “Grimly” he can’t sleep because My wife thinks out loud. (an impart a very Coen-esque parable.) (updated 5/16/2014)

The Fosters – Emma in her 1st season (on ABC Family) is a multi-ethnic, multi-problem, multi-orientation large (California, I think) family of choice and complications. The girl on “Jesus”s (played by Jake T. Austin) wrestling team, “Emma” (played by Amanda Leighton) and potential romantic interest, was suddenly and surprisingly, revealed to be Jewish in “Padre”, story by Tamara P. Creator and teleplay by series co-ceator Peter Paige. She appears at the door post-funeral: I know this is kind of. . I told my mother about your grandfather and she told me to bring food. We’re Jews, that’s what we do. It’s noodle kugel. It’s totally delicious and vegetarian so totally organic and diet free. “Jesus”: You didn’t have to do this. “Emma”: Try telling my mother that. His sister and video chat friend are quite surprised at seeing her; the sister calls her: So you’re the crazy girl! Crazy only because you’re the only girl on with all those boys on the wrestling team. “Emma” cheerfully responds: People think that to be a wrestler you need to be built like a Mack truck or something! As she leaves: “Jesus”: Thanks for the ku--- or whatever. “Emma”: Kugel! And you didn’t even try it. “Jesus”: I promise when I go back in side I’m going to try it. “Emma”: It was nice meeting all your family. . .Thanks for letting me crash. [I’ll catch up with “Emma”, but there weren’t other explicitly Jewish references in the season.] (updated 4/15/2014)

In House of Lies - Sarah’s 2nd season (on Showtime) began in the 2nd episode “Power(less)”, written by Matthew Carnahan, when “Sarah” (Jenny Slate) showed up for lunch with her husband “Doug Guggenheim” (played by Josh Lawson). She prattles on as they walk back to his office: A lot of people do the same things in self defense: Kick him in the crotch! Kick him in the crotch! But I said to the teacher, “Why don’t you grab for both? The thingy and the stuff!”. . . I’m just blabbing and blabbing because I’m nervous. I don’t know how to say it. . .I pulled the goalie! He: What does that mean? She: You know how in sports there’s the goalie, like in hockey and soccer, there’s the goalie? And when the goalie is not on the field?. . . He: And there’s no one to stop the players shooting at the goal? She: Or maybe to shoot 60 million shots into the goal? He: Wait, you stopped using birth control? She: I did! He: Why? Why? Why would you do that? She: Because I want us to have a baby? He: That’s great! She: Doug, if you’re not sure about this you need to say something to me right now. He: Hold on a second. You didn’t even tell me! I mean. Which is fine. How long, I mean, have you been, have we done it since? Doesn’t matter, that’s fine. hey, it’s great! I have no problem with it. What’s not to love about fucking babies? I love them. She: Then why are you acting so weird: You are. Just say if you don’t want to do it, say no. Say yes or no. He: I think it’s more complicated than that. I think, if I’m being honest, that if you’re projecting this on to me that I don’t want to have a baby which is ridiculous. I’m clearly thrilled about it. You need to have a look at your own feelings. I mean really look at them, Sarah. Because if you’re feeling fear or insecurity around this, then that’s a problem. She: Forget it. We’ll talk about this later. She storms off. He complains to his uninterested colleagues: She’s already trying! God, I love her. But a baby? That is just so absolute! What do I do?. . .If you put Plan B in a smoothie or something?
In “Soldiers”, written by Jessika Borsiczky, “Sarah” is on top (in full bra and panties) for sex keeping up a stream of fast fertility talk: I'm ready now. Yeah, yeah. Put your baby juice in me. I can feel a life starting with every thrust. Do it! Can you see our adorable child? Uh yeah He's being made right now, babe. And he has your eyes. And he's got a cute little penis, Oh, God, just like his father. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. That was felt so good. Mmm. Honey? Mm-hmm? Did you come? What? Because it totally didn't seem like you did. Husband: What are you talking about? No, I made the noise and everything. Of course I came. But he immediately confesses to his uninterested co-workers: I didn't come. I've been withholding orgasm since she decided, we decided to, uh, get pregnant. . .Because I want to want a baby. Just it's odd, and it's all happening so fast. But in the next episode “Middlegame”, written by Wesley S. Nickerson III, he’s able to fantasize during sex enough to declare: I think I just put a baby in you!
In “Pushback”, by Taii K. Austin, the big guy in the hip hop style mogul’s entourage “Foxx” (played by Antonio D. Charity) [I think it was him, not “Vernon played by Aflamu Johnson] sneers at management consultant“Clyde Obherholt” (played by Ben Schwartz): Man, you brought this Ivy League Ashkenazi all the way over here, and that's the best financial advice he got? Man, the Jews is fallin' off. But “Lucas Frye” (played byT. I. Harris) explains the source of his “inappropriate” remarks: Rachel Cohen broke his heart in middle school, and he’s still bitter. Don’t take hat Jewish shit personal. But back to the “Rachel”/”Doug” baby drama in “Brinksmanship”, written by Theo Travers, as he has to go to Chicago on a business trip, and looks forward to quality time with a new junior analyst “Caitlin Hobart” (played by Genevieve Angelson). But at lunch, “Rachel” is all about her gyn-OB: There was a line! Ugh! It's, like, don't make more appointments than you have time for. If you can only see five vaginas in an hour, don't schedule ten vaginas!. . . Dr. Caplan saw a surge in my L-H levels, and I'm at peak fertility for the next two days. “Doug” tries all kinds of excuses, but she persists: Well, that's really interesting, Dr. Guggenheim. I booked myself a ticket to Chicago. . .Please don't worry. I'm not gonna get in the way of your work. I'm gonna be quiet as a church mouse. You know, I'm just there for the nookie. He tries another tack: So how 'bout this? How about you and me slip into the bathroom and have a quickie right now? She: Oh, horrible offer. I don't want to conceive my baby in a restaurant bathroom! Are you crazy? He: I just think it'd make a funny story. . .I've got Purell on me. I'll wipe you down. I just I think that we could take care of business before I leave. He goes on to argue for a refund on her plane ticket. She: Oh, my God, Doug! You are such a cheap bastard! That's what this is about? My God, our baby isn't even worth $1,200 to you? . . . I'm coming to Chicago. End of story. He exaggerates with a “ch”: L’chaim. In Chicago, she first says she’s too tired to come with “Caitlin” to an art exhibit, then jealously joins them – but proves she is intellectual and the two women bond: I just don't find it all that fascinating. . . A friend and I saw these really cool interactive proto-pop collages at MOCA a few weeks ago. . .They were very physical, and -- “Caitlin” agrees with her enthusiasm, to “Doug”s discomfort. At the airport, the couple argues in front of their colleagues. He: Sarah, there is nothing going on between me and Caitlin. She: Yeah, like you could even get her. Senior colleague “Jeannie Van Der Hooven” (played by Kristin Bell): I'm sorry to interject. But you think Caitlin's too good for Doug, and you thought I had a thing for Doug? “Sarah”: No offense, Jeannie, but you do like to pass it around. . . I came here, Oh, God, to make a baby with you and to connect, and you just treated me like shit. Actually, Doug, I don't want to whisper because I'm fucking angry with you! “Doug”: I don't care that you don't understand abstract postmodernism. “Sarah”: Oh, my God. You know what? This isn't about last night. This has been going on for weeks. . .You're acting weird. . .You're pulling away. . .And you know what? I know that you're not coming every time that we have sex. Like I don't know what a hot load feels like? He makes excuses to “Caitlin”: That’s just Sarah stuff. That’ll blow over. But when “Caitlin” thoughtfully switches seats so “Sarah” can move into business class to sit next to him in business class, “Sarah” tears up: Do you not want to be with me?. . .If you're not happy, then, um, let's just end this. “Doug”: It-It's just a lot of new all at once, right? The speedy marriage, the trying to have a baby, the things at work. It's -- it's confusing. “Sarah”: Either you're in it or you're not. Which is it? “Doug”: It's only two options? “Sarah”: One of us needs to make a decision. And until you can get your shit together. And she quickly goes back to coach.
In the penultimate episode of the season “Together”, written by David Walpert, “Sarah” took him back on her distinctive terms. She greets him at her front door: Hey, asshole. He: And we're right back into it with the witty banter. . .Please. I'm sorry. . . I don't know what I can say to make things right or what I can do. I just know that I need you in my life. . . .Look, I'm not the kind of guy women ever went for. I wish I was, but I'm-I'm not. Hell, I took a cousin to my prom. And not even a pretty cousin, either. . . .But anyway, you came along, and you were so beautiful and so cool, and-and you made the insane choice of actually wanting me. And not just wanting me, going so far as to trick me into marriage. She: I would have tricked a lot of men into marriage, actually, so don't flatter yourself. He: I'm trying to say that I didn't appreciate how fucking amazing you are. She: Well, not as amazing as Caitleen, right? He, correcting her mispronunciation: I held Caitlin up as this ideal. But then I realized- She: That she's a boring little bitch? He: I was gonna say that I realized that she's not you. She: And that she's a boring little bitch. He: Okay. But compared to you, compared to anyone. She: I kind of need you to say it. He: Um yeah, she's a boring little bitch. I know, right? She: Yeah. That's what I've been trying to tell you. You can come in now. . . Lot of memories on that couch. It's where I first gave you a blow job. . .We were watching “Chicago Fire”, and you said, ‘This show is so stupid.’ Do you remember what I said? ‘Do you want a blow job?’ - You were just like, ‘Yes, please’ He: Because I did. I did want. She: You hurt me, Doug. He: Jesus! I'm sorry, Sarah. I'm so sorry. I'm such an idiot. If I could go back and if I could take it all back Hey, look at me I love you so much. She, as they start passionately making out and exchanging verbal and oral endearments: I wouldn't have tricked anybody else into marrying me. I was just lashing out. Oh, come here. . . I think this is great. I just wish that we had figured that out last week. Also, I had an abortion last Friday. . .I don't know, there was a baby, and then there wasn't one. He: You had an abortion? Are you serious? Hey. Why didn't you tell me? I mean, I know we'd broken up, but it was mine, too. Was that a shrug? Did you just shrug? That's a shrug. Yeah, that's a weird shrug. She: You know what, Doug? I wasn't completely sure that it was yours, okay? I went on a bit of a spree. He: But you used protection. She: You know how I feel about condoms, Doug. He:Oh, my God! She: Well I'm gonna go get some Fresca. Do you want a Fresca? (updated 9/20/2014)

Transparent (a half-hour dramedy pilot on Amazon Instant Video), written and directed by Jill Soloway, features a Jewish Los Angeles family, with Jeffrey Tambor as the father. His three adult children include two sisters. The first clue they are Jewish is about half-way through, when on the way to a family dinner Dad initiated, the siblings joke about all the “Marcy’s” he’s dated since their parents’ divorce when the youngest, the son, was 15, by riffing on their very Jewish last names, with many fictional ones, including: Kaplan, Goldberg, Rubinstein,. . . or Kristallnacht, Belsenburger. When the brother “Josh” (played by Jay Duplass) jokes: You guys never did teach us how to eat, you realize that?, Dad rejoins: Because we come from shtetl people. Your grandma Rose actually ate lettuce with her bare hands. The eldest is “Sarah” (played by Amy Landecker), a suburban wife and mother of two girls. At what is apparently a similar Jewish school to the one featured in Soloway’s Afternoon Delight, she bumps into an old friend (played by blonde Gillian Vigman) dropping her daughter off, after finishing an assignment in Bahrain, who is serving on the fundraising committee: If you don’t raise $5,000 for Tu B’Shevat, then Dana Goodman just implodes. Her younger sister “Ali” (played by Gaby Hoffman) later reacts at the mention of her: Tammy mother-fuckin’ Cashman! Does Len know your kids go to the same school? “Sarah”: Why would Len care? “Ali”: The woman who you spent your entire college years lezzing it up together? “Sarah”: Who doesn’t experiment in college “Ali”: Experiment? You two were talking about adopting a kid together. That’s not experimenting. “Sarah”: That did not happen. “Ali”: OMG I distinctly remember you calling up and saying you were going to adopt two Mexican boys. “Sarah”: Salvadoran. While she doesn’t tell her husband “Len” (played by Rob Huebel) that her father has offered her his house, as his big announcement at the dinner, she does refer to wanting to plan a play date for the kids-- with that lesbian I went to Madison with (“Len”: I like lesbians.), who she then has an amorous play date with herself, and explains she hasn’t told husband that dad offered her the house, with apparent references to Jewish neighborhoods in L.A.: Len hates living on the east side. He calls it the g-hetto. I don’t know if I’m ready to live on the west side., and makes jokes about goint to the Farmer’s Market. “Sarah” treats her dad exactly like her apparently Jewish, gray-haired mother (played by Judith Light) treats her apparently stroke-recovering husband “Ed” (played by Laurence Pressman), as she rails against her condo association board members, and to “Ali” mocks her ex for dating younger women, so wants nothing to do with him: I wouldn’t believe a word your father says, ninka, neyn, necht! “Ali” is apparently on a losing streak as a writer, even as she’s talks to a friend about a new satirical-sounding project, but Dad writes her a check: What happened to the Price Is Right money? “Ali”: It’s gone. That was like 6 yrs ago. . . Dad: I’m always happy to help you out when you’re in trouble. “Ali”: I’m not in trouble, I’m just. . Dad: You more than all of all my kids, you’re the one who can see me most clearly. Probably because we share the depressive gene. “Ali” I’m not depressed! Dad: It is so hard when someone sees something you do not want them to see. At home, “Ali” examines herself naked in the mirror, then meets with a hunky black personal trainer “Derek” (played by Henry Simmons): I hate my body. . I hate it. I want to change it. . . I want those sculpted arms. . .sinewy instead of this, nice tailored waist, rounded ass. I want to feel rooted. Like a fucking tree trunk, just planted, so not like I’m gonna fall over. He asks what she eats, and she babbles about food, and they concur against deprivation. He: I believe in discipline. She: I could use some discipline. He pushes her through push ups until she can’t do any more -- and motivates her to do more with an ass slap she quite likes.
Amazon announced it was picked up for a season just in time for me to miss to miss the cheaper price for Amazon Prime to watch it – or will it come out on DVD or some other cheaper option? And maybe we’ll learn their last name? Soloway stated: “It’s honestly a dream come true to make nine more episodes of Transparent, I feel so lucky to be working in this moment when innovation in distribution allows for the most free flow of creativity I’ve ever experienced professionally. These characters are bursting in my mind waiting for the palette of the set and the flesh and blood and voices and comedy of the actors. More to come....” Carrie Brownstein has been added to the cast as “Ali” (Gaby Hoffman)'s best friend “Syd”. Will the Portlandia star/creator play a Jewish woman? (updated 7/3/2014)

In the New Girl (on Fox) “The Box” episode, by Rob Rosell, “Schmidt” the womanizer (played by Max Greenfield) is lying on the couch as if at a shrink’s: So yes, I was dating two girls at the same time. After he lists his physical complaints from the break-ups, an exasperated voice, recognizable as Jon Lovitz, says: Were the girls Jewish? Schmidt: One Indian, one regular. Do you want to see a picture? The camera turns to Lovitz: I don’t even know why you’re here. You said do you have a minute. . . Schmidt: I’m sorry, Rabbi. It’s simple, how can I be a better person? After “Schmidt” spends the episode throwing around that he’s selfishly trying to do mitzvahs and tsedakah, he interrupts the rabbi’s male-only bar mitzvah class seeking more sympathy: Did you ever date two women at the same time? The rabbi can’t help but brag, again to the detriment of Jewish females: : I went to camp. They used to call me the octopus.
But in the next episode “Keaton”, as written by Dave Finkel and Brett Baer, directed by David Katzenberg, his very stereotyped Jewish mother appears in a flashback narrated by his friend/roommate since college “Nick Miller” (played by Jake Johnson) to explain his behavior: When Schmidt was 7, daddy divorced mommy. He didn’t take it well. . . .Endless cycle of chocolate and stars. . .Desperate, Mrs Schmidt looked to the stars. Movie stars. Mrs. Schmidt wrote that little fat loser a letter of support from the star of his favorite movie Batman. But not the confusing new one, the good one with Michael Keaton. . . His life changed forever. . . Schmidt wrote back and kept writing back. . .For every letter he sent, Michel Keaton sent one back. . .Schmidt went off to college and Mrs. Schmidt unloaded her secret onto his only friend, and that friend was me. Chubby “Mrs. Schmidt” (played by Barbara Kerford, repeating her role I missed in the 2011 “Naked” episode) is portrayed with dark, curly hair from behind at the typewriter turning out letters from Keaton. When “Nick” finally confesses the truth, “Schmidt” is appalled at the realization: My mom? You're going to tell me that my mom helped me with my public erections? I drew pictures!
In “Birthday”, written by Kim Rosenstock, “Schmidt” is trying to comfort his model ex-girlfriend over her employment prospects: A lot of people never graduated high school. Einstein, Bill Gates, Anne Frank. OK, I’m going to take back that last one.
I think the “Sister” episode, written by Matt Fusfeld and Alex Cuthbertson, was intended to sarcastically answer criticism of “Schmidt” not being seen dating Jewish women. He asks “Nick” to be his wing man at a party: Jewish girl – sensible nose – high level target. . .Imagine me next door with a nice Jewish girl? Turns out he meant a bar mitzvah and immediately sticks on a yarmulke: The target is Rachel. She’s a Hebrew school teacher. “Nick”: And . . crashing some random kid’s bar mitzvah is the best way to get to her? “Schmidt”: Get her on a dance floor - “A little bit softer now. A little bit louder now.” Sweep her off her feet. Get married. Have a son, tell him the story of how I met his mom at this bar mitzvah. Not a dry eye in the house. Jewish continuity, etc. etc. Get a piece of hamentashen. The problem is her dad is my rabbi and he hates me. So I just need to charm Rachel before he tells her horrible/true things about me. “Nick”: I distract the rabbi while you hit on his daughter. “Schmidt”: Action! Go! He puts on an Israeli accent to her: Rochel baruch ata what a nice dress! “Rachel” (played by Allyn Rachel): Shabbat a hello. He: Not as good as mine. How’s Hebrew school? “Rachel”, guzzling wine: Not bad. The only place that would hire me when I got out of rehab. Rabbi interrupts: No no no! Rachel, you will not speak to this man! This man is a nut ball! “Schmidt”: A nutball! How dare you – I’m a goofball! Rabbi: Sammy Davis Jr. was a goofball and you, sir, are no Sammy Davis Jr! As her father pulls her away “Rachel” yells: I want sex! He wants to have sex with me! Let him! I love sex! Sex! Later, “Nick” gets punched out for kissing a flattered old Jewish lady, and the Rabbi is impressed: Nice shot Dr. Nussbaum! Would you like to date my daughter? She’s available! “Rachel”: Oh great, tell the whole room I’m available! Rabbi: I’m not telling the whole room, I’m telling Dr. Nussbaum – a doctor! “Rachel” mumbles: Oh I got that. (updated 2/28/2014)

Ray Donovan (on Showtime) opened up with a dead, putative Jewish woman, in “The Bag or the Bat”, by series creator Ann Biderman. “Ezra Goodman” (played by Elliot Gould) is so distratught at his wife “Ruthie”s funeral, that he kicks out his gentile mistress “Debra” (Denise Crosby), who is surprised he’s hurling Yiddish words at her. After sitting shiva for her, in “Twerk” by Ron Nyswaner, he plans a groundbreaking for “The Ruth Goldman Ovarian Cancer Center” with a symbolic shovel: It should be golden, it’s what she deserved. . .She was a wonderful woman. . I often said that she was an angel. The drunken mistress, who mocked his “shrine”, starts muttering at the fundraising kick-off, then gets disruptively louder: Ruth the saint. . Ruth. . .was no angel, believe me. . .She was sleeping with her shrink for years! He speechifies: There was nothing she wouldn’t do for anyone. . .I see this center as my legacy. Ruthie wanted that, a legacy is important, especially when you’ve done terrible things not to be spoken of. There’s a price to be paid. Separately, both the haunted husband and the yelling mistress have to be pulled away from the scene. In “The Golem”, written by Sean Conway, he is suffering from a brain tumor, but laments Ruth was my one true love. The only one I ever really loved, much to the consternation of his mistress entering the room behind him. On the verge of brain surgery, he regrets that while he’s given “Ruth” a foundation and hospital, he hasn’t given anything to “Debra”, so considers getting her a dog – which two episodes later, in “New Birthday” written by David Hollander, she laughs he named “Ruth”, but This Ruth has a big dick! In “Road Trip”, by Brett Johnson, “Ezra” sadly sacrifices “Ruth”s legacy by draining the Foundation’s account to help “Ray” pay off a hit man.
“Ray”s tough, burly henchman “Ari” (played by Steven Bauer with an accent that I’d been wondering was Russian or Israeli) reveals he has a Jewish mother. He’s on the phone outside Las Vegas while transporting an old Irish-American hit man cross-country: Did you take your medicine?. . .So send Joey to the CVS. Yes, today, the blood thinner. Me too. Bye bye. Hit man: Your mother? “Ari” shrugs: I’m usually there on Fridays. Shabbat. Hit man: How old? “Ari”: 85. She’s starting to lose it. She sideswiped two cars last week. I had to take her keys away. The hit man’s moll snorts about how FBI’s Most Wanted (clearly modeled on Whitey Bolger) is even more devoted to his mother.
In “Bucky Fucking Dent”, written by Ron Nyswaner, ”Ari” revealed more while protecting the family while “Ray” is involved in various violent problems. He explains to the wife’s queries about his social life that he’s busy with his mother on weekends: From Friday to Saturday she can’t do anything, like turn o nthe lights or cook. . .Shabbat. The son is curious: Why? . . .What? The mother translates: The Sabbath. The son: Like Black Sabbath? The daughter snorts: That’s a band, stupid! “Avi” continues: My mother is Orthodox. She keeps kosher. She can’t do anything on the Sabbath. It’s a holy day, a day of rest. The son is intrigued: Why don’t we do that? Mom: We’re not Jewish. Daughter: We’re not anything. He’s later biographical with the son while they play violent video games that “Ari” excels at, explaining why he was formerly in the Mossad: I’d do anything to get off the kibbutz. My parents split up and I went with my father. I hated it. You had to ask permission to kiss a girl. . . Not really. For added irony, “Ray” buries the priest he killed in the concrete foundation of “The Ruth Goldman Ovarian Cancer Center”.
These Jewish women were ironically referred to in the season finale “Same Exactly” written by Ann Biderman. “Ezra” announces he’s asked “Deb” to marry him (it’s complicated, but there’s a client’s baby involved): Ruth would want me to be happy. You know they met once - -but Ruth didn’t know she was my mistress. “Ari” accompanies “Ray” to confrontation with the old hit man, who conversationally asks: How’s your mother? Just as “Ari” is (literally) disarmingly answering Fine, the hit man shoots him point black in the chest, though not dead by the end. (updated 9/29/2013)

As part of the BBC’s 50th anniversary of Dr. Who, the docu-drama An Adventure in Time and Space, written by Mark Gatiss, briefly acknowledged in passing that the founding producer of the franchise Verity Lambert (played by Jessica Raine) was Jewish. After the head of the BBC Drama Department Sydney Newman (played by Brian Cox) notes that: This place needs a person with piss and vinegar in their veins in promoting her to a new job as the first female producer there, she asserts herself to sexist older staffers, aggressively orders drinks from a bartender, then toasts: To the pushy Jewish broad. Her colleague Waris Hussein (played by Sacha Dhawan) responds: L’chaim! The postscript scroll, accompanied by her photograph, identifies that she went on to be “a legend in British broadcasting”. I was left wanting to know more about her! (11/23/2013)

Foyle’s War continued the British Masterpiece Theater (on PBS) tradition of Jewish women characters as Holocaust victims, in “The Cage” episode, written by David Kane. (Commentary forthcoming - it took me long enough to figure out that the Auschwitz survivor “Mrs. Ross” was listed in the credits as “Katrin” played by Katherine Kanter.) (9/23/2013)

On Drop Dead Diva (on Lifetime: Television for Women summer Sundays), the “The Real Jane” episode, by Josh Berman, had a Jewish woman murder victim for a plot reason new to me. The lawyer, too, is surprised: Tracey Rivlin was buried in the shirt she was wearing when she was killed? Another lawyer is helpfully informative: Yes, remember, Tracey is Jewish, and under Jewish law the victim of a murder is buried in their clothing, over which. . And the relevant Maimonondes citation is provided about internment procedures, that I was found supported in details about Taharah ritual requirements: “This is intended to waken G-d’s anger; to ‘prompt’ Him to exact vengeance for the terrible crime.” This excerpt from Dignity Beyond Death: The Jewish Preparation for Burial by Rochel U. Berman clarifies: “The Code of Jewish Law states, ‘One who was assassinated by a non-Jew, although he did not bleed at all, should, nevertheless, be buried in the clothes which he wore at the time as a demonstration of wrath.’” [Thanks to David Zucker for the references.] Later, “Mrs. Rivlin” (played by Frances Mitchell) storms in: Four years ago you convinced me to dig up my daughter’s body. Then you didn’t show up at the cemetery. . .I almost did it, because of you, and now you ask me to come to your office just before the execution? She slaps the lawyer. My baby is dead and you can go to hell! While the mother is convinced her daughter’s classmate is guilty because he was convicted, the lawyers are sure the shirt will have the DNA of the real killer in a bite mark: What would your daughter want to do here? Mother: You really think he’s innocent? Lawyer: I really think it’s worth finding out. The mother tearfully agrees, and the client is exonerated, in her presence in court. (7/9/2013)

On Who Do You Think You Are (in the 1st season onTLC, after the NBC version of the Brit series) Chelsea Handler tearfully declared: I’m proud to be a Jewish-American! after she traced her German grandfather’s history with the Nazis. On the “Austin” episode of the similar Genealogy Roadshow (on PBS), a Tejano woman, who can trace her family’s Texas roots to the early 19th century, brought to TV a history rarely mentioned when she got DNA confirmation of her family’s Sephardic crypto-Jewish heritage in presumed flight from the Spanish Inquisition. (episodes commentaries coming) (updated 10/20/2013)

Generation Cryo (on MTV) is a twist on the Docu-Series seeking your roots genealogy series, with young people seeking half-siblings from the same sperm donor. Episode 1 – “Who’s Your Daddy” led 17-year-old Breeanna from Reno, NV to a 17-year-old half-brother and half-sister raised in the Jacobsons’ Jewish home in Atlanta, GA. Over home movies of the dad Eric playing with his kids growing up, the mother Terri frankly explains: “We’ve been married 22 years. It took us five years to conceive Hillit and Jonah. My husband was sterile, not a single sperm in sight, and I wanted to be pregnant. So we went the donor sperm route and five years later conceived these amazing kids.” Jonah: “Being Jewish is a big part of our life.” They warmly introduce their half-sibling to making Shabbat in their nice suburban house, explain the ritual, the Hebrew, and traditional Friday night dinner. (Bree confides to the camera that the mother she lives with was curious for reports on “How those Jews do.” She later confides to the camera “That was my first Hebrew, or Jewish dinner.”) The gay Bree is nervous to do the girly thing of getting a manicure together, and, she later confides, her first ever pedicure. Bree tells her camera diary: “She seems like a sweet girl who has her shit together. Hopefully she’ll open up.” Hillit, like her brother, has no interest in meeting their sperm donor, just to see a photo, “because of the way my mom and dad raised me. . . I have no connection to him at all.” But Terri turns out to be very curious to know a lot of details about the donor, and reveals that the couple argued for years about whether to tell the kids. Her husband emotionally explains how difficult the process was for him to accept his sterility and be secure. Bree is quite taken aback that a family dinner can result in an intense conversation and later confides to her camera diary: “I’ve never been around people who talk so openly. . I saw a new concern for family.” The next morning, Terri follows up with her husband: “In the past you’ve been freaked out about the donor, about the donor showing up and our kids’ involvement with the donor. . . That is a possibility . . .I just want to know who he is because he’s provided half of our kids’ DNA. I love meeting these siblings because it helps me understand Hillit and Jonah a little bit better.” But he’s even more upset “about my definition of what my family is. . .an attack on me”, weeping: “You’ve never understood that.” But he agrees to sign the consent form out of sympathy for Jonah compassionately offering to help Bree “on her journey”. Hugs all around as she sets out to meet a dozen other half-siblings, helped by Jonah’s DNA sample, and starts scrapbooking their photos.
In the 2nd episode “Come To Grips”, I paid attention to her looking through the sperm donor’s profile questionnaire where he marked “Jewish”. So more of the sibling families, and half-sisters, turned out to be Jewish. Later, another clue to finding the sperm donor is that he listed Hillel membership on another questionnaire for another family, though “Bree” is ignorant what that means. While my additional commentary on the rest of the series is forthcoming, references to many of the half-sibs and their families being Jewish seemed to be edited out of the later episodes. (updated 1/15/2014)

Joan Rivers - everywhere has become a media icon of Jewish women, along with her daughter Melissa, so I followed her TV appearances more regularly, whether their own Jewish ethnic identity is referenced or not, but particularly if they reference Jewish women. I haven’t yet caught up with the dozens of episodes of her web/podcast series In Bed with Joan Rivers.

”Still Life” photograph by Benjamin Bouchet, described to Christopher Ross in The Wall Street Journal Magazine, 2/7/2014 (fair use excerpt): “"Only when you love dogs very much do you let them sit on $300-per-yard French fabric. Samantha is the little black-haired one and Teegan is my newest rescue. I've never been one of those Fifth Avenue ladies that have to have dogs that match. I am the Angelina Jolie of barkers. The Al Hirschfeld drawing is beyond meaningful to me: It's from when I was doing the show Broadway Bound. This was right after I was fired from Fox and my husband committed suicide. I went into the show, got amazing reviews, and it re-kick-started my career. So I look at that and it says to me, life goes on. In the photo of my daughter, Melissa, and my grandson, Cooper, you are looking at a very cold Jewess at a Jets game on Thanksgiving. It was a great game, but I was thinking, Could the cheerleaders here do a Sondheim number? The monkey figurine Cooper made when he was about 6 or 7. I hate when you go in a house and you have to comment, Oh, look what your stupid child did, but in this case it happens to be a work of art! He's a very precocious talent. The other photo of Melissa and me is in a Fabergé frame that my husband and I bought in England—our first piece of Fabergé."
In their participation in the June edition of Celebrity Wife Swap (on ABC), which was really “Celebrity Mother Swap”, with Sarah Palin’s daughters Bristol and Willow, their interactions continued a recent pattern for the image of Jewish women on TV as ambitious. Both Rivers are shocked that the sisters are not interested in following up on the “lean in”, as it were, career opportunities they offer each young woman in what I considered as typically helpful Jewish mothers. (More detailed commentary forthcoming.)
Natalie Portman’s dress was awarded Best Dressed by Joan Rivers' Fashion Police (on E!) for the Oscars where she was awarded the Academy Award for Best Actress to the delight of her “Joan Rangers”. Portman linked the on and off screen issues of Jews and fashion: From Racked: "As the face of Miss Dior Cherie [perfume, she] was widely expected to wear a Dior Couture gown on the red carpet at the Oscars Sunday night. Portman chose, instead, to wear Rodarte—designed by the Mulleavy sisters who made several of the actress's costumes in Black Swan. Today [3/1/2011], Portman issued a strong statement officially condemning [chief designer] John Galliano for the pro-Hitler statements he [was seen making in]. . .'I am deeply shocked and disgusted by the video of John Galliano’s comments that surfaced today. In light of this video, and as an individual who is proud to be Jewish, I will not be associated with Mr. Galliano in any way. I hope at the very least, these terrible comments remind us to reflect and act upon combating these still-existing prejudices that are the opposite of all that is beautiful.'"
Rivers has also made pointed comments about gay designers and stylists (a significant share of her audience) being clueless about women’s bodies they dress and set beauty standards. On the SAG Awards 2013 show (I only watched the special editions), she wryly explained to the confused stylist George Kotsiopoulos the pencil measurement technique for how a girl is fitted for her first bra.
On the Emmy Special (I tried not to feel guilty about watching while Joan was still disputing with the Writers’ Guild - ironically, the show’s striking writers used her catch phrases to press for union representation), Giuliana Rancic flamboyantly introduced Mayim Bialik’s dress as by designer Oliver Tolentino (Mayim described her selection on her blog), and Joan made a point of unusually commenting on Mayim, who was nominated for Big Bang Theory: I know her very well, And just so you all understand why she’s wearing this dress – she’s a vegan, she’s a spokesperson for the Holistic Women’s Network [sic], and she’s a devout Orthodox Jew – so everybody take a good look at this dress becaue this is about as pretty as it’s ever going to get. The “Joan Ranger” audience guffawed, then stylist George Kotsiopoulos: I understand for religious reasons she has to be covered up. I understand that. But this is really not cute. It’s wrinkled and the fabric looks cheep this is one of my Worst-Dressed Nominees. But the women on the panel challenge him. Kelly Osbourne: I agree that it’s not the best dress in the world, but it is a vast improvement to what’s she’s worn before. I think it’s pretty for her. I’m happy that she didn’t wear what she used to wear. A triptych of her past appearances is put up on the screen, like Mayim herself put up on her blog. Giuliana: I’m with Miss Kelly. I think this is the best she’s ever looked. I think this dress fits perfectly. I think she looks fantastic. What do you want her to wear? George makes a sour face. Joan, putting on a Yiddish accent: I think she’s a terrific comedienne. So for those who don’t know, Mayim is a Hebrew word for “So here’s what’s happened to Blossom, Not that I care, but here’s what happened.” Later, they all criticized Zosia Mamet of the Emmy-nominated Girls, for her dress such that she wins “Worst Dressed”, but without any Jewish references to her or the character she plays.
4th season of Joan & Melissa: Joan Knows Best? (onWEtv – commentary forthcoming) She was even welcomed back on The Tonight Show, to promote the series, now that it has a new host, Jimmy Fallon, with no ties to past feuds. Jordan Zakarin, in The Wrap, 3/28/2014, cited: “There were jokes about the Holocaust — within 20 seconds of appearing! — as well as plenty of cracks about her vagina… all of which made a laughing Fallon a bit uncomfortable.” While it will be awhile until I catch up on the series, I happened to hear one exchange in 2nd episode “Extreme Make Under”: Melissa: Aren’t you concerned about your reputation? Joan: The only thing that would hurt my reputation in this town would be having Mel Gibson at my Passover dinner. In the preview to the season’s penultimate episode “Blue Balls”, she’s unpacking family mementoes, including her grandmother’s matzoh ball soup recipe, all laden with Jewish references. (More commentary forthcoming.)
Her defense of Israel on TMZ during the summer war in Gaza went viral as “a rant”, with her proclamation “I’ve been there!” I’m overwhelmed with all the tributes and memorials to her, including ones emphasizing her Jewishness; at some point I’ll try to link to “best of”s, as the entertainment world, from L.A. to NYC, did a rousing version of sitting shiva. For example, ABC’s 20/20 – Joan Rivers: A Comedy Legend, whose host called her “the ultimate Jewish mother”, replayed an old, really frank, interview with Barbara Walters, back when Rivers was still the guest host for NBC’s The Tonight Show with Johnny Carson, where she, ironically, was asked if she’ll ever be considered as the permanent host: “No– I’m a woman. I’m acerbic. I’m a New Yorker. I’m Jewish. . .A certain roughness, a certain edge to a New Yorker. Anyone who has a creative zap to them turns people off. I say ‘I’m just trying to make you laugh. It’s all a joke, folks.’” Which resonanted particularly when she was shown walking off a summer 2014 book promotion on CNN by a host who just didn’t get how her Red Carpet barbs were more a Jewish take on the style biz as the updated shmata trade than personal nastiness: “You are not the one to interview about humor.” (updated 9/14/2014)

Princesses: Long Island (on Bravo) (I erratically saved this 1st and hopefully one-season “reality” series on my DVR, had to download and copy the summer episodes to make room for better shows, butI just may yet watch whatever ones, if the copy works, out of perverse curiosity, because some of the episode titles veered to curiously offensive: such as “You Had Me at Shalom”, “Shabbocalypse Now”, “Intermenschion”, “Sunrise, Sunset”) (10/25/2013)

On Parks and Recreation (on NBC), “Mona Lisa Sapirstein” (played broadly but yet sweetly by Jenny Slate) was back, now with her doting, rich, doctor father played by Henry Winkler, in the season opener “London” written by Michael Schur. (commentary forthcoming on this episode). “The Sapirsteins” returned in the season finale “Moving Up, Part 2” written by by Alan Yang and Aisha Muharrar, where the father has become the nemesis of “Tom Haverford” (played by Aziz Ansari), whose latest entrepreneurial effort is a restaurant. He brings in the siblings as party planners for the opening. She misunderstands the planning meeting to get all excited that she thinks it’s “a four-way”, starts undressing, and sulks when told it’s not. As she promised, she brings in a V.I.P.: My daddy is the V I P-est I know. I love you Daddy! Dad responds: I love you too, Angel. She: Money please! He hands it over to her delighted Thank you! (updated 5/24/2014)

Annie Edison in the 5th Season of Community (on NBC) Perhaps because the original showrunner Dan Harmon is back there was surprisingly revealing moments about her family, in the “Maintenance and Educational Publishing” episode by Don Diego, that fans of the show had no interest in. Her visiting brother “Anthony” (played by Spencer Crittenden, a regular on Harmon’s podcast) is huge, hulking, hirsute and monosyllabic – the opposite of her. “Annie” (played by Alison Brie) bubbles on So nice to have the Edison kids under one roof again! Remember when we used to cut carrots for mom? She enthusiastically hugs him for fixing the refrigerator door, and proposes him as a new roommate: He has money and he’s handy. . .He’s a good guy! But “Abed” (played by Danny Pudi) calls him “a Viking. . .who does’n know whether to poop or keep cutting carrots. She: When we were kids, Anthony and I would play time machine. We would go “Oh no! We’re in barbarian times! Quick let’s go back to the time machine! Then we would run back to the time machine. . .I bet that's why Abed is like a brother to me. You guys are so alike! “Abed” (played by Danny Pudi): I can't accept that based on one time machine story. It turns out “Anthony” doesn’t want to be her roommate to share her rent: I think we have some unresolved issues here. She takes him seriously: Yeah, I’m so hurt about mom turning her back on me when I went into rehab. And I guess part of me was mad at you for siding with her, so I thought you moving in here was some kind of moral victory? But he was actually talking about the absence of “Abed”: And screw you! I was 13! and he storms out. (4/16/2014)

Felicity Smoak in the 2nd season of Arrow (on CW, out on DVD) She’s a bit blonder this season as she and “Oliver Queen” (played by Stephen Amell) seemed to grow closer (a.k.a. to “shippers” as “Olicity”). Halfway through the season the CW posted a promotional photo on FaceBook of the actress Emily Bett Rickards, sans “Felicity”s glasses, with the caption: “Brains and beauty ... what more could one want?”
She finally remembered her Jewish identity (as usual in TV series) in the December “Three Ghosts” episode (get the Dickens reference?), story by Greg Berlanti and Andrew Kreisberg, teleplay by Geoff Johns. The geeky “Barry Allen” (played by Grant Gustin) tries to flirtatiously distract her from “Ollie”s billionaire by day and saves the city at night derring-do with: So any plans for Christmas?, she shuts him down with: Lighting my menorah. “Barry”, however, leaves “Queen” a Christmas present – his signature mask.
While I’m behind posting how her character has developed over the season, “Heir to the Demon”, written by Jake Coburn, had insights. “Oliver”s mother “Moira Queen” (played by Susanna Thompson) confronted her about what her computer research uncovered: If you won’t keep my secret for Oliver’s sake, you should keep it for your own. I see the way you look at him. . .You tell him this and you will rip his world apart. A part of him will always blame you. Oh, he’ll hate me for sure, but a part of him will hate you always. We all have to keep secrets, Ms. Smoak. But she tells him anyway, in tears, as he insists on the truth: You notice that I talk a lot. “Oliver”: It has not escaped my attention. She: You may have noticed I don’t talk a lot about my family. My mother is my mother. I don’t really know what my father is becuase he abandoned us. I barely remember him, but I do remember how much hurt when he left. So I don’t want that hurt again. “Oliver”: You’re not going to lose me. Is this about your family? “Felicity”: It’s about yours. She wins and loses: while he breaks off with his mother, he passionately falls into the arms of his ex-lover at the end.
In “Suicide Squad”, written by Keto Shimizu and Bryan Q. Miller, we learned just a bit more about her. She brings a cup of cocoa out to “John Diggle” (played by David Ramsey) who has assigned himself as her security: So I get you outside my house just like a lacrosse player my freshman year of college. . .Yeah, I had a life before you and Oliver. [Thanks to “King_Lemur” for clarification.]
In “City of Blood”, written by Holly Harold, we learned some surprising more about her. First she’s upset after the sacrificial suicide of “Oliver”s mother: I don't even know why I'm crying. I didn't even like Moira. Terrible thing to say about someone after they've just died. In my defense, she was not nice. She was diabolical. Not a word you often hear at someone's funeral. “Diggle”: You’re not crying for her, Felicity, you’re crying for Oliver. She begs “Oliver” not to give himself up to his nemesis, and tearfully reveals more about herself: I don't accept that. You shouldn't either. You can't just accept things, Oliver. If I had accepted my life, I would be a cocktail waitress in Vegas like my mother, and I never would have gone to college, and I never would have moved a thousand miles away to work at Queen Consolidated, and I never would have believed some crazy guy in a hood when he told me I could be more than just some IT girl. Please don’t do this. . . There has to be another way. “Oliver”: There isn’t. But she helps find another way, using her skills over a kidnapped bad guy: Oh, look at this. You have a bank account in the Cayman Islands. Wow. $2 million, quite the little nest egg. But... looks like you just approved a wire transfer of $1 million to a charity here in Starling City. Very generous. What should I do with the rest? . . .[ Greenpeace] Great cause! And they really appreciate your support. Bad guy snarls: You bitch! Triumphant “Felicity”: A bitch with Wi-Fi! “Oliver” recognizes her important role, along with “Diggle”, before the key battle: This started with the three of us. It's time we got back to that. I will comment more on the season finale “Unthinkable”, story by Greg Berlanti, teleplay by Andrew Kreisberg and Marc Guggenheim, where they “pretend” to be a couple to fool their enemy: She: It was really smart the way you outsmarted him. But unthinkable, you and me I mean. When you told me you loved me, you had me fooled that you might have meant it, what you said. . You really sold it. He smiles: We both did. She: Let’s go home. The conclusion was promoted to fans on FaceBook: (updated 10/1/2014)

Broad City As Stephanie Butnick noted in Tablet Magazine 1/23/2014, “On Comedy Central’s Broad City, Two Jewesses Just Want To Have Fun”, with comedians Abbi Jacobson and Ilana Glazer playing versions of themselves, We’re just two Jewesses trying to make a buck, “Glazer writes in a Craigslist ad, with the hopes of securing the funds they need ($200) for the Weezy show.” in H. Allen Scott’s Thought Catalog interview with the two, 3/26/2014: “IG: [O]n a positive note, Girls is such a successful, beautiful, well-made show. And the people who actually watch the show see that our show is very different. Women are always put against each other. . . I do think it is reductive and because we’re women and perceived as Jewish white girls from New York City in their early 20’s. As much as I’m like, ‘Sorry, I don’t produce that show,’ we know what TV is about, it’s not like it’s the most well rounded medium.” [My commentary on the series forthcoming, hopefully before the 2nd season.] (updated 3/27/2014)

Dr. Zoe Hart in the 3rd Season of Hart of Dixie (the CW, streams free a week later on Hulu) It took until the November “Family Tradition” episode, written by Dan Steele, for her very New Yorker writer boyfriend, bespectacled “Joel Stephens” (played by Josh Cooke) to be explicitly identified as also Jewish. I’m behind on commenting on the “Miracles” episode, written by series creator Leila Gerstein, that featured his “Grandma Sylvie” (played by Patty McCormack) visiting for a Hanukkah party.
In “Act Naturally”, written by Dan Steele, “Candice Hart” (played by JoBeth Williams) re-appeared. Despite “Zoe”s positive opening position: My mother and I just managed to put the past behind us, to build a relationship out of trust and honesty. But she turned into a stereotyped controlling Jewish mother than she was before: I waited for an invitation to Christmas, Hanukkah, and it never came, so I thought I’d come for my only daughter’s birthday. . . I promise small, no fuss, no candles that don’t blow out. She complains when they’re out to dinner: The house, Joel, forgotten holiday invites, you’re setting down roots here, building a future here, and I can’t believe there isn’t a place for me. You’reshutting me out. “Joel” tries to keep her happy –and away from her birthday party with her biological father’s family- but he complains to “Zoe”: If judgment had a face, it would be your mother’s.-- and that was before she really gave it to him using code words: I’m disappointed in what’s going on here, and I can’t belive you allowed it to happen.. . .You allowed her to move to Bluebelle, to buy a house, to set down roots a thousand miles from me! I had a very happy summer in NY with my daughter. Even happier when she found a New York boyfriend. Yet somehow we’re back here. I blame you. “Zoe” joins her mother for breakfast on her last day in Bluebelle. Mother: Did you have a secret first breakfast with your other family? “Zoe”: I deserved that, I’m sorry that I didn’t tell you. I was worried you would feel hurt. But now that it’s all out in the open I realize there was nothing to worry about to begin with. I’m so glad that you came and met them. Mom: You’re right. The Wilkes are terrific, loyal caring, a great family. “Zoe”: It’s great to have them here. Mom: And that’s why I cant let them win. . . You Zoe. If Bluebelle is where you’re going to have you life, a house, a family, eventually grandbabies, well if this is where it’s going to be, then this is where I’m going to be. In Bluebelle.
But the “Here You Come Again” episode, written by producer Sheila Lawrence, escalated further into a freshly annoying level of TV’s image of the materialistic, pushy, controlling Jewish mother, even without a single explicit Jewish reference. It turns out that her mother is a hard-charging celebrity publicist, and she takes “Zoe” on as a client to get back her medical practice, before condoning her adoption by Bluebelle. [Commentary and transcription forthcoming.]
The season finale, “Second Chance”, written by Leila Gerstein, closed with something of a Jewish-style wedding, as “Joel’s Grandma Sylvie” (Patty McCormack) married “Zoe”s cousin “Vernon 'Brando' Wilkes” (played by Lawrence Pressman). There’s two officiants, the one in a white robe an implied rabbi, but the widow and widower exchange their own personal vows. The groom steps on a glass to conclude the ceremony, the guests shout Mazel Tov!, klezmer-style music plays at the party, and Grandma pulls “Zoe” in to join her to dance to a simple clarinet version of “Hava Nagilah”. (updated 6/13/2014)

The Goldbergs – Beverly, Erica plus (on ABC) How did this dreadful, more Jewish re-take of The Wonder Years, let alone repeating almost every negataive Jewish female stereotype from early Philip Roth, get on the broadcast schedule? Blonde “Beverly” (played by Wendi McLendon-Covey) is a monstrously smothering mother, and the older sister “Erica” (played by Hayley Orrantia) is pretty much a bitch. Oy, it got renewed for a second season. [Commentary on transcriptions forthcoming.] (updated 6/6/2014)

Rachel Berry etc. in the 5th season of Glee (on Fox) (More detailed commentary forthcoming as “Rachel” is cast in a Broadway revival of Funny Girl.)
In “The Quarterback” the tearful tribute to the death of Cory Monteith, who played “Rachel”s boyfriend “Finn Hudson (and Lea Michele’s real-life on/off again boyfriend according to the tabloids), written by Ryan Murphy, Brad Falchuk and Ian Brennan, she confides to the glee club teacher with both her characteristic Jewish reference and selfish touch: I was going to make it big on Broadway, maybe do a Woody Allen movie, then when we were ready I would come back, and he’d be teaching here. I would just walk through those doors and I would just say I’m home and we would live happily ever after. . .He was my person. . .I didn’t know if I would be able to sing again, and now I know I can. I got much more choked up at the acoustic cover of Springsteen’s “No Retreat, No Surrender” by the other Jewish character “Noah 'Puck' Puckerman” (sung by Mark Salling) than I did by her cover of Bob Dylan's "To Make You Feel My Love."
A brief preliminary note on the fraught episode “Frenemies” written by Ned Martel, that features bitter and revealing arguments between now NYC roommates “Rachel” and “Santana” when the latter successfully auditions to be her understudy in Funny Girl, by singing her signature “Don’t Rain on My Parade” no less: Fumes “Rachel”: That song is Miss Streisand’s as long as she’s on this planet. But let me tell you something. When she goes, it’s going to be my responsibility to sing it! “Kurt”: Do you know how insane you sound? “Rachel”: It was completely inappropriate for her to audition without telling me. . .Fanny Brice is a New York Jew. You playing her is like me being the Grand Marshal of the Puerto Rican Day Parade! . . .I’m arguing on principle. This is not personal!
A brief preliminary note on the fraught episode “Trio” written by Rivka Sophia Rossi, that opens with: Here’s what you missed on ‘Glee’: Santana landed the job as Rachel’s understudy in ‘Funny Girl’ even though Santana is Latin and Fanny Brice is clearly Jewish. Amidst an episode where “Rachel” is obnoxious and condescending to her replacement gay roommate “Elliott ‘Starchild’ Gilbert” (I’m so ignorant of American Idol that I didn’t realize he’s played by Adam Lambert, though I have been impressed that he’s getting “Rachel” to rock out ), “Santana” continues to rail against “Rachel” with Jewish references, and warns him: It’s all a part of my master plan so I can psych out Berry and get to play Fanny Brice. First comes big hair, then comes incredibly sexy rehearsal clothes that she could never pull off. Then I’m going to sneak into the theater and tack up yearbook photos of her from sophomore year when she was a chunky little butter ball. Just a reminder, once a fatty, always a fatty. As God is my witness, I will bring her down. . . Life is very high school, just with bigger stakes. And if you knew Berry the way that all of us did you would be applauding me. In the beginning it’s all sunshine and giggles and stickers and then the second that you want the same thing as her a dark cloud comes over her whiskery little chin and she will chew you up and spit you out, like a Jewish Hilary Clinton.
A brief preliminary note on the episode “100” that has “Rachel” being obnoxiously competitive, written by Ryan Murphy, Brad Falchuk and Ian Brennan, this time it’s the African-American “Mercedes” (played by Amber Riley) putting her putdowns of “Rachel” in a Jewish context, as she ruminates: So what, she got cast in a play as an annoying Jewish girl. What a surprise. And sweetly sarcastic: Hello Rachel, I am so happy to hear about all your success. . . .If you’ll excuse me, I’ll make my way to the back of the bus. . . It all comes down to how cool you are. Rachel Berry represents Broadway, the past. I represent the future. . .and songs you actually hear on the radio.
”New Directions”, written and directed by Brad Falchuk, found a new way to be stereotypical in its depiction of Jewish women in the guise of being satirical, when “Tina Cohen-Chang” suddenly discovers her Jewish identity for the first time in five seasons, with some reference to the actress Jenna Ushiwitz’s bio as having been adopted from Korea, as she narrates: I got rejected by my back-up school, Ohio State, and Brown still hasn’t told me if I got in yet, so at this point, I’m taking desperate measures. I get it, I was adopted and have never been to temple, but all of my friends are going to be in New York and Mitzvah Unvieristy is the only school that’s still accepting for the fall semester. So I wrote an essay about the reason I am applying so late is because I was on a kibbutz, whatever that is. So here we go, fingers crossed. I just got to get to New York someway. She fills in the application with her name just as “Tina Cohen”. She walks into Glee Club very upset: I’m going to spend my lifetime in Lima because I’m not Jewish enough. We see the unctuous admissions director, with an Israeli flag on his desk, talking his letter: ”Mitzvah University was delighted to receive your application, albeit it was five weeks late. However, we know the truth-- your name is not Tina Cohen, you are Tina Cohen-Chang. You are a big fat liar.” So not getting into Mitzvah U, I’m the ony one not going to college. . I just feel like a loser. Without any explanation, this reinforced clannish definitions and was a sadly missed opportunity to show the inclusiveness and diversity of the American Jewish community. Instead she announces she got into Brown. Before “Santana” eventually apologizes and drops out of the show after reuniting with her lesbian girlfriend, she sticks in a last dig to “Rachel”: You’ve been dreaming about this role since you were in gay utero, and you’ve been working your tiny butt off to get it. . . I don’t want to be a Broadway star.
In a switch, a Jewish reference was in a complimentary context, in “New New York” by Murphy. Showing she’s contrite after quite a bout of diva-ness after her producer lends her a limo that she insists is only a town car, “Rachel” offers to help wheel-chair bound “Artie Abrans” (played by Kevin McHale) on the subway after his mugging experience: Trust me, I took krav maga as a child at the JCC and I can protect you.. After she squawks ferociously for a taxi, the episode concludes with her rehearsal singing of “People”, smiling at all her friends, and walking on a crowded sidewalk with all the real New Yorkers.
While the nastiness about her ambitions, even after achieving her Broadway success, continued through the end of the season, at least in the season finale, “The Untitled Rachel Berry Project” written by Matthew Hodgson, there were no Jewish insinuations and had a veiled reference that she’s moving on from her Jewish roots, even as she convinced TV writer “Mary Halloran” (played hilariously by comedienne Kristen Schaal) to base a new series on her, somehow revealed by her singing Pink’s “Glitter in the Air”: I always thought that Fanny Brice was the role I was born to play, but when I read this, this is it. This is my dream role! . . They like my script! I’m going to L.A.! OMG! OMG!
Yet series creator Ryan Murphy, who was honored this year with the Louis XIII Genius Award at the Critics’ Choice Television Awards, seems oblivious to how this nastiness to “Rachel” comes across. In a Vulture interview with Denise Martin, Ryan Murphy on Glee’s Final Season: New Location and Smaller Cast”, 4/15/2014, “Maybe because it’s been a tough year, but I feel like the word we keep talking about is kindness,’ Murphy said. Since the show’s move to New York, no villain, antagonist, or bully has turned up. That may not last — both Santana and Sue will be back sooner rather than later — but ‘the heart, humor and warmth [of this stretch of episodes] feels like the Glee I remember loving in seasons one and two. . . and that I think is because we’re really concentrating on the characters.’” The tabloids had a field day believing that the on-screen tensions between “Santana” and “Rachel” were reflected in the off-screen between Naya Rivera and Lea Michele. (updated 6/12/2014)

Mrs. Wolowitz in the 7th season of Big Bang Theory (on CBS, out on DVD) (As heard and referred) Until I get around to posting my transcriptions, that I can vouch for, of all the nasty comments by and about “Mrs. Wolowitz”, fan episode transcripts are eventually posted.
Though her character “Amy Farrah Fowler” isn’t Jewish, the actress Mayim Bialik is probably the most prominent observant Jewish actress working in TV, so I follow how she’s treated by the media each year. In her 2/17/2014 blog post she reviewed her participation on HBO’s Real Time with Bill Maher as “the only nighttime talk show that has booked me in the [sic] phase of my acting career, save for my appearance on the Craig Ferguson show last year. I don’t know why it’s so hard for me to get booked on shows, but I loved being on Bill Maher’s show as an author, a scientist, and a woman with a brain.” [She has been on several daytime talk shows, and she was las season on TBS’s Conan, but she may have meant in the context of promoting her books, including the new Mayim's Vegan Table: More than 100 Great-Tasting and Healthy Recipes from My Family to Yours.] As to the host quizzing her on “Jews. Defending religion is hard in 30 seconds. Defending my choices as a person who both lives in the secular and scientific world and appreciates the ancient and mystical world is not easy to do off camera, much less on camera. I tried to be honest. I tried to demonstrate that I am not perfect nor am I a representative of ‘The Jews’. I don’t know if all of humanity should turn to atheism. I don’t know that the true sign of cultural evolution is to do away with religion. And I don’t think the Torah is wicked, as Bill Maher insinuated. I honestly didn’t know how to respond to that! The Torah is not wicked; it’s people who can be wicked, and it’s people who can pervert Truth. That’s hard to address in 30 seconds.”
I’ve been logging all the Jewish-themed nasty comments about “Mrs. Wolowitz” to post eventually. “The Mommy Observation”, teleplay by Steven Molaro, Eric Kaplan & Anthony Del Broccolo, story by Jim Reynolds, Steve Holland & Maria Ferrari, started with the usual sarcastic cracks in an episode dealing with mothers’ sexuality. “Sheldon” (Jim Parsons): Do you have any idea what it’s like to see your mother ravaging someone? “Howard” (Simon Helberg): Does a brisket count? “Sheldon”: We’ve all seen your mother naked. That woman needs to learn how to tie a robe. But then “Howard” turned surprisingly sympathetic: I’m talking about when my mom started seeing someone a couple of years after my dad left. . .She was dating this guy and I was kind of a jerk to her about it. . .Let’s just say it was the most vicious bar mitzvah speech in the history of Temple Beth El. Anyway, she broke up with him and she’s basically been alone ever since. She never said but I always felt I was the reason why. “Sheldon”: Sorry, but based on your story, you absolutely were the reason why. “Howard”: All I’m saying is you might not want to get in the way of your mother’s happiness.
Noting a surprise, even shocking, conclusion to the season finale that piles on her image as a nightmare, “The Status Quo Combustion”, teleplay by Steven Molaro, Steve Holland & Tara Hernandez, story by Eric Kaplan, Jim Reynolds & Jeremy Howe, morose, hapless, destitute, literally burned-out comic book store owner “Stuart Bloom” (played by Kevin Sussman) jumps at the job of home health aide to the bedridden “Mrs. Wolowitz”, after it was described by her son as: I know a place you can stay and earn some money. It’ll involve degradation, humiliation and verbal abuse. At her house, “Stuart” is wearing medical scrubs when he cheerfully joins “Howard” and his wife “Bernadette” (Melissa Rauch) in the living room, who were at their wits’ ends caring for her after several aides, including “Penny”, rapidly quit: Hey what are you guys still doing here? I got this. Go – go home. “Howard”: You sure? “Stuart”: Sure, she’s fed, she took her pills, she’s all tucked in, and she’s watching TV. “Bernadette”: So she’s not too much for you? “Stuart”: You kidding? I love her – she’s great! “Mrs. Wolowiz” calls out sweetly: Stuey! You going to watch “Wheel of Fortune” with me? “Stuart”: Coming Debbie! “Howard”: You call her Debbie? “Stuart”: She insisted. So hey, thank you guys. This job is a dream come true! And he skips off to her room. “Howard”: Is that weird? “Bernadette”: I don’t know why, but something about it feels unnatural. “Howard”: So let’s go? “Bernadette” chortles Yeah! and they leave fast. updated 9/9/2014)

Shoshanna Shapiro in the 3rd season of Girls (on HBO) was used to promote the upcoming 2014 episodes in a very Jewish context on FaceBook in September 2013 with the heading
“To the Girls celebrating, may your #RoshHashanah New Year be as sweet as Shosh”:
Fans followed up with unofficial “Shoshana”-related sukkah decorations: one set of seven characters to represent the seven ushpizin (guests) and an Aussie-made pun “Happy Shoshanna Rabba” meme for the end of Sukkoth:
.
I haven’t even watched the 3rd season yet, but there’s talk online that blonde Jemima Kirke, the actress who plays the British cousin “Jessa Johannsson” is Jewish, as in “granddaughter of Jewish-British-Iraqi real estate developer Jack Dellal”, per Jewcy, 3/14/2014, where Elissa Goldstein gushes: “Ah, Jemima Kirke and Michael Mosberg! Glam-Jewy-indie couple extraordinaire!” Kvelled over are photos of her 2009 “Orthodox” (i.e. she was apparently Jewish enough for the bearded rabbi) wedding on the fashion/lifestyle Refinery 29, that she self-describes as “non-traditional”, and her day in the life in New York Magazine, 3/10/2014, that included a Shabbat dinner. (updated 5/18/2014)

”Rebecca Levy” on Strike Back in her 2nd season (on British Sky and U.S. Cinemax) surprised “Sgt. Damien Scott” and the audience by showing up in Colombia on the opening episode of the 4th season, written by Simon Burke, director Michael J. Bassett, and Tim Vaugham, as the arm candy “Celine”, with the distractingly curvaceous derrière, of Lebanese narcoterrorist “Leo Kamali” who just killed a Section 20 agent: What the fuck do you think I’m doing here? “Damien”: You said no more Mossad! No more killing! I gave you that out! She: Did you really believe it was going to be that easy?. . .This is what we do! Kamali is mine! Do you have any idea what I had to do to get close to this guy? He snickers: Yeah, I got a pretty fair idea. She: Do you even know who he is? Do you know why I’m here? He: So Mossad can disappear him? Fuck that! He killed one of ours. He’s mine! She: Do not fuck this up! I am thisclose to getting something. “Damien”s British partner charges in: Is this a fucking family reunion? “Damien” orders the bikini-clad “Rebecca” to get dressed, but he rolls his eyes as she puts on a sexy dress, so she retorts: You think I brought my fatigues? “Damian” snorts: Unless you have a bunch of Mossads disguised as tree frogs, he’s ours. The trussed up “Kamali” is listening to all these revelations with considerable surprise, and “Damian” grins at him: Yeah, she’s an Israeli agent. She drags him out into the jungle, to a hijacked river boat amidst constant gunfire, and it’s blown up. As it sinks, “Damian” looks alive – but her? Oh no – is this why the actress isn’t listed in the opening credits?
Yeah, that was why, per the 2nd episode with the same writers. “Damian” just barely manages to rescue her – with the surprising assistance of “Kamali”. On land, “Damian” frantically does CPR: Come on! After a suspenseful delay, she chokes up a lot of water – but her first thought is: Where’s Kamali? They look around and he’s gone. Back in Bogota, they are having a passionately naked reunion in bed, with her mostly on top. In a post-coital cuddle, he tells her about “Kamali”: Y’know that fucking asshole came back to the boat to get you out? If he hadn’t, you wouldn’t be here. Who fucking does that? For a Mossad agent? If it was me. . . She: You’d have let me die. Yeah, me too. He chuckles: See, that’s why we’re made for each other. She’s up and out of bed: I have to go. He: Fuck, really? How long ‘til they get here? That Mossad team you’ve been waiting for? That’s why you’ve been here with me. She: Maybe I want to be here with you. . This is a Mossad mission. You crashed my party, remember. He: When do they get here? She: 24 hours. She advises on a vault with key information. He grins: We’ll get to rob a bank! When they kidnap the brother of the dealer she’d been undercover with, he recognizes her: You lying, fucking whore! She remember the dealer liked the name “Esther” and it works for a password. The partner is sarcastic: What – you two were together long enough to pick baby names? There’s a huge shoot-out after they rob the dealer’s box and she takes a hit! “Damian” shouts: No! and holds her in his arms as the shooting continues. She begs him for water –and does something that really surprised me: she recited the Sh’ma into Viddui, her dying prayer. [Thanks to David Zucker for the reference.] And she does die! Couldn’t they have left it more ambiguous so that she could be brought back later in the season? He closes her eyes, and his partner offers to bring her with them. But he kisses her farewell and proceeds with a carjacking escape. In the getaway ride he keeps flashing back to her smiling at him in bed. But “Kamali” and his cohorts capture, taunt, and torture them: If you stay here you die for nothing, like Rebecca. He then reveals he’s really an undercover CIA agent!: I’m the only hope you have. I wish she hadn’t died. But she knew the risks – we all do! Just when it seems he’s lied again, he helps them escape, again. RIP Rebecca!
While “Damian” doesn’t mention her again while he’s screwing other women who have ulterior motives, this interchange in “Episode 25” written by John Simpson, about the roots of the Middle East’s problems was intriguing. “Lt. Philip Locke” (played by an unsually gritty Robson Greene) is interrogating one tough extremeist IRA broad “Mairead McKenna” (played by Catherine Walker): What were you doing in Beirut? Meeting up with like-minded jihadists? You were going to bring Sharia law to the nine counties and turn the North into some kind of Muslim caliphate? She snarls: Better the Muslims than the British. . .I get to see the look on your face when every fuck you ever trod on for the past thousand years has clubbed together and is coming back to get you.? (updated 9/15/2013)

Magic City – Evans family, etc. in the 2nd, last season (on Starz, available on DVD) By the final episode “The Sins of the Fathers”, by Mitch Glazer, the Jewish females are almost forgotten amidst the violent fall of Jewish gangsters. Only when “Ike” sympathizes with the prosecutor because they both have daughters, and he wouldn’t have wanted his daughter drugged and raped at his hotel as happened to the lawyer’s: I’m truly sorry.(More commentary forthcoming.) (updated 5/19/2014)

Prisoners of War (Hatufim) – Wives, Daughter, Sister, Intelligent Agent, and more women in the 2nd season (Israeli 2012 series streaming in the U.S. as of June 2013 on Hulu, week by week, whole season bingeable on Hulu Plus, available in US-format DVD)

Ziva David on NCIS in her 9th season (The 11th season on CBS, streaming full episodes) was announced as her final season on 7/10/2013 in “NCIS Scoop: Cote de Pablo to Exit This Fall, Producers Promise 'Appropriate Closure' for Ziva”, quoting her statement after her contract expired: “I look forward to finishing Ziva’s story.” Which led USA cable channel, which reruns episodes to great ratings success, to feature “Ziva Appreciation Day” September 7, 2013, in a marathon of “Ziva”-centered episodes, with tweets from her fans. While my commentary on her last episodes is forthcoming, it was suprising that the only Jewish thing about “Ziva” in the last few seasons as she became more Americanized– her Jewish star – came to represent her. (updated 10/6/2013)



2012/2013 Season

Pioneers of Television (PBS) season finale “The Mini-Series” left out the 1978 Holocaust, which was egregious to not even be mentioned alongside the discussion of Roots, Rich Man, Poor Man, and The Thorn Birds. The significant series had a tremendous influence in the U.S. and abroad to generate many subsequent documentaries and features, particularly about women. (3/31/2013)

Family Tree (on HBO), a satirical mockumentary of genealogy research programs, written by Christopher Guest and Jim Piddock, managed to stick in Jews into the roots of“Tom Chadwick” (played by the Irish Chris O’Dowd) when he followed clues to California. In “Indian”, he discovered that the “Rebecca” he’d been searching for from a horseback riding photograph as a presumed member of the Mojave tribe was in fact a different MOT – a Jew from the Barstow “Schmelffs”. In the finale “Cowboy”, it was a bit nasty that the only Jewish women “Schmelff” descendants were off recuperating from cosmetic surgery when he went to visit. (7/23/2013)

MTV’s Awkward is usually a refreshing comedy about parents and teens, but the Season 3, 2nd episode “Responsibly Irresponsible”, written by series creator Lauren Iungerich, was kind of nasty. Joking about standing around while sitting shiva for unpopular “Ricky Schwartz” with silent female relatives, the narrating “Jenna Hamilton” (played by Ashley Rickards) wryly notes his paintings of women spilling out of their dresses: Ricky’s obsession with breasts was evidently home-grown., as she looks over at his big-bosomed, grieving, mother. Her boyfriend “Matty McKibben” (played by Beau Mirchoff): Want to hear something creepy? Ricky’s grandma just told me Ricky was breastfed until he was eight. Their friend “Jake Rosati” (played by Brett Davern) chokes on his drink: It’s insane how much we didn’t know about that kid. (updated 6/1/2013)

Esther Blanco (plus) on Shameless (U.K.) (final seasons streaming this year on Hulu) In the last couple of seasons of this raucously, raunchy take on working class life in a government housing project in Manchester, England, the scam artists, drunks, and petty criminals and their children had more contact with middle class folk, usually on the way down in the recession, so there was now interaction with Jews. In Season 9, the 3rd episode, written by Ed McCardie, had its first Jewish woman character – well, a dead one, from when two scamming old ladies crashed “Irene”s funeral for the refreshments. Pretending to have known the deceased, “Patty Croker” (played deliciously obnoxious by Valerie Lilley) in the ‘60’s, even at Woodstock, starts blathering niceties about her being church-going, before realizing the attendees are wearing yarmulkes, and she has to switch stories:Jewish, of course. That is still a religion, even as it comes out this Jewish mother deserted her 2-year-old son and went off to Australia. She elaborates on their fictional friendship to reassure the now adult “Alan” (played by Marcus Garvey) – and in order to benefit from him spending his inheritance. But he gets creepily obsessed with her as a substitute mother: I should be very fucked up for all that she done to me. I need to know why she left. To get rid of him, she spins a tale of his mother’s true non-Jewish identity, unhappy marriage, and lesbian affair. And then she recognizes her in an old photograph.
In the last, 11th season, the series’ distinctive, and hilariously complicated, “sex degrees of separation” brought in the Palestinian “Kassi Blanco” (played by Jalaal Hartley) married to the Jewish “Esther Blanco” (played by Isy Suttie), and their three kids, including daughter “Talya” (frequently incorrectly spelled as “Thalia”, as played by Jade Kidruff). Interestingly, fans seem to have completely misunderstood that she represents a hippie, less materialistic, anti-establishment middle-class ethos that has similarities, yet counters, to how these working class rogues work the system. (commentary forthcoming) (updated 7/17/2013)

Royal Pains in “Off-Season Greetings”, written by Constance M. Burge and Michael Rauch, finally with this special winter wedding episode of the 4th season of the summer series, at least dealt a bit with the “Lawson” family’s Jewish heritage – but only at the provocation of the new blonde bride, with zero reference to any Jewish woman like a big blank in their lives, implying that tradition doesn’t go on without one. The bride, “Paige Collins” (played by Brooke D’Orsay), excitedly gathers the father and two adult sons together: It’s almost time! The groom “Evan” (played by Paulo Costanzo): Time for what? She: Hello? Sundown? We do it by a window? Stop messing with the shiksa! I know you know it’s the first night of Hanukkah. The guys all act surprised. She: You didn’t know it was the first night of Hanukkah? The father “Eddie” (played by Henry Winkler): I had a feeling that this night was different from other nights. The doctor, “Hank” (played by Mark Feuerstein): Yeah, Hanukkah’s not like Christmas, it’s hard to keep track of, it’s 8 nights, gelt. . The groom: How did you know it’s the first night? Bride: Because tradition matters to me, and I want to respect your tradition the way you respect mine. So I’ve been studying up on Judaism. I wanted to surprise you. Groom: Sorry, but I completely forgot. Bride: OK, where’s your menorah? The guys hesitate. She: you don’t have a menorah? Doctor: We moved a while ago, and I don’t think I brought. . . Bride: Guys, this is a great holiday, your great holiday. These things are important. They have meaning. They should matter. Doctor: They do matter. He takes his phone calls as his dad ribs him: Seriously, Hank, on Hanukkah? Doctor: Excuse me Rabbi Lawson, Happy Hanukkah. Dad: We can make a menorah—all we need is an egg carton and some tin foil! The bride is perturbed: No! No! No! It also pokes at TV’s tendency to falsely make the December holidays equal, which the shiksa doesn’t understand. (12/21/2012)

Happy Endings managed to have an entire episode set at bar mitzvah parties, “Boys II Menorah” by Dan Rubin & Lon Zimmet, without any Jewish females. Instead, one of the shicksas among the clueless friends seemed to be as irresistible as crack cocaine, as she said, to the Jewish 13-year-old boys, though her girlfriend speculates it’s because: You’re a goy with vaguely Semitic looks who looks like she knows her way around a Handrew Jackson. (11/14/2012)

The season premiere, part 2, of Law & Order: Special Victims Unit, “Above Suspicion” written by Warren Leight and Julie Martin, was so confusing and convulted that a casual comment could have been misunderstood by many viewers. With Peter Jacobson as the obnoxiously Jewish pimp “Bart Ganzel”, who tosses off Yiddish insults of his African-American lawyer and intends to flee to Israel as “our homeland”, one of the women detectives explains that the threatening “Sergeant Ted Koundak” (I’m not sure this is his accurate name as only one fan site cited this identification and I couldn’t ID the actor) was for another female cop, “Alana Gonzales”, “her rabbi” who she was sleeping with -- and I think there’s viewers who took her literally. Oddly, the slang phrase got repeated the following week, in “Twenty-Five Acts”. teleplay by John Paul Roche, when “Det. Benson”s interim captain hands her his business card before he moves up to another position: If you ever need a rabbi. . . (10/12/2012)

On Hawaii Five-0 (CBS) in the “Ohuna” episode by Mike Schaub, the detective’s sister’s elderly patient “Morty” (played by Shelley Berman), visiting Honolulu for his bucket list, advises her: I need you to go see your mother. . .You get a second chance. Not everybody does. I’d give everything I’d own for one. I’d give anything to see Zoe Ann Sapirstein. . . My only daughter. . .We got into a fight, over this boy she was seeing. Her mother and I disapproved. She left college and took off for San Francisco, with the guy, we didn’t speak for years. One day the phone rang, it was the highway patrol. A carpet salesman from Oakland had too much to drink and hit my daughter’s car, killed her instantly. Not a day goes by I don’t wish I’d picked up the phone and called her. I missed the privilege to know her because I was a stubborn SOB. Go see your mother. You only have one family.
In contrast, “Kapu”, written by David Wolkove, threw in an even more gratuitous comic relief comment about a Jewish female. When the homicide detective seeks his hacker helper, known as “Toast” (played by Martin Starr) who I cannot recall ever revealed any Jewish identity, his roommate “Bullwinkle” says he went home, home to Baltimore, for his sister’s bat mitzvah. I know it’s crazy, right? Twelve years old and already a woman by the Laws of Moses. A little young, no? Mazel tov. Which is an excuse for him to light up his pineapple bong, and offer it to the cop. (updated 1/17/2013)

On New Girl, the “Katie” episode by series creator Elizabeth Meriwether, the roommate “Schmidt” (played by Max Greenfield) goes on one of his bragging jags about his past sexual escapades. This time he reminisces about when he was at his most irresistible to the opposite sex: For me, it was the 3rd night of Hanukkah, or as I call it, ‘The Night of the Shoshanas’. (10/9/2012)

On Parks and Recreation (on NBC), fans assumed that when “Mona Lisa” (played by Jenny Slate) was introduced this season as the hilariously obnoxious, irresponsible, and sex-obsessed sister of “Jean-Ralphio” (played by Ben Schwartz) she was Jewish, which I didn’t presume at first because I hadn’t realize they shared the last name “Saperstein”. While these two funny actors usually play Jewish characters, I didn’t pick up a single explicitly Jewish reference in the three episodes she guested on. Per TV Line, 2/23/2013, by Michael “Ausiello: Her character, Mona Lisa Saperstein, is being brought on primarily to terrorize Ben. ‘One of my favorite things to do in the world is take awful people — like Jean Ralphio or Mona Lisa — and just put Adam Scott in scenes with them,’ says exec producer Mike Schur with a laugh. ‘I have them act so horrifying and then have Adam just basically be the conscience of the show, and be absolutely blown away by how horrifying they are.’” (6/25/2013)

The sixth season of Mad Men, set in 1968, has been notable for showing Madison Avenue’s increasing hiring of Jewish men, as Rachel Shukert noted in “Mad Mensches”, 4/12/2013 in The Tablet. But until “The Flood”, written by series creator Matthew Weiner and Tom Smuts, with its Biblical references, there hadn’t been a Jewish woman character in awhile, until here when Michael Ginsberg (played by Ben Feldman) was set up by his father for a date with a presumably Jewish school teacher “Beverly Farber” (played by Nicole Hayden). (Commentary forthcoming)
In the penultimate episode of the season, “In Care Of”, written by Carly Wray and Matthew Weiner, “Peggy Olson” (played by Elisabeth Moss) goes over budget with a Rosemary’s Baby-satire TV ad for St. Joseph’s Aspirin by using too many actors – including a Jewish mother-type character who is surprised to recommend it over chicken soup – as amusingly enacted with a Yiddish accent in a run-through for the client by the very goyish red-haired “Joan Harris” (played by Christina Hendricks), and described in this interchange with Alan Sepinwall, posted on 6/5/2013, “Mad Men creator Matthew Weiner on Don's confession, Bob Benson's origin and more from season 6”: Q “And Christina Hendricks' old Jewish neighbor lady? I don't know how long you've been sitting on that, but that was gold. Matthew Weiner: ‘That was a shock to me. We had written it, but I didn't know it would be that good. Christina is so funny. These people are really funny. There is a lot of stuff in the show that we want people to laugh at. That was a huge welcome surprise; I was not there the day they shot that, and I just saw it in the dailies and am still laughing about it.’” (updated 6/25/2013)

Spies of Warsaw, an internationally produced mini-series shown on BBC America’s DramaVille, based on the Alan Furst novel I haven’t read (yet) that he co-adapted with Dick Clement and Ian LaFrenais, is set on the eve of World War II, and at least the Jewish woman was a different victim than usual. The least attractive and blandest woman in the series, “Malka Rosen” (played by Linda Bassett), is a middle-aged Bolshevik who, with her husband, agrees to tell Russian secrets to the French embassy liaison in exchange for asylum, though that doesn’t provide safety from assassination attempts, even hiding on a luxurious estate outside Paris. When war breaks out, it appears that the couple give up into suicide. (4/11/2013)

On Southland, the “Babel” episode by Aaron Rahsaan Thomas about how the diversity of languages leads to violent miscommunications on the streets of Los Angeles, the cops come upon a little old lady (Bunny Levine) yelling at a group of African-American skateboarders who complain she assaulted them: I defended myself! I’d do it again if I had to!. . .These young men! They play in the street! They hit me, so I hit him! The young black guy, who explains how he accidentally bumped into her: Tell him what you called me! She: What – a schvartze? Bleep. I didn’t survive Hitler to be run over by a skateboarder. . .I’ve lived I nthis neighborhood for 60 years! My father built the baker, my husband ran the deli! The young man challenges where she’s pointing: That’s BS! That buiding’s been abandoned! She: At the end of the day, that’s all we had. One cop mutters something like: Gentrification’s a bitch. The Latino “Officer Hank Lucero” (played by Anthony Ruivivar) teases the teens: So how did Grandma hit you – with a haymaker or an uppercut?, then smiles a Yiddish phrase to the old lady as he leaves. [In trying to find anyone else who might have understood what he said, on the IMDb Forum “AxemanLOTRDT, 4/13/13: I watched it with a friend who speaks Yiddish and he said that it sounded like (translated literally), ‘pretty clothes’ or (more loosely), ‘nice dress.’ We both agreed that it still didn't make a whole lot of sense.” (updated 4/15/2013)

In The Bible (History Channel), you would barely know there were Jewish women in the Old Testament (what with Jesus’s 33 years getting a lot more hours of air time than millennia of Jewish history). In Part 1, “The Beginnings”, the few seen are querulous nags – Lot’s Wife gets seen (sparing viewers the sexual conspiracy of her daughters), but not the matriarchs Rebecca, Rachel, and Leah. Curiously, Sarah is even deprived the authority of naming her son, instead that is attributed to the male angel. She survives discovering her son was nearly sacrificed, unlike the more meaningful midrash that explained her immediate funeral in Genesis as from dropping dead at the news Isaac brings her about The Akeda. In Part 2, “Homeland”, Aaron’s wife is seen, but no Miriam. While I appreciate the racial diversity shown among the ancient Israelites, Samson’s dark-skinned mother gets more attention than the briefly seen Michal, Saul’s daughter/David’s first wife, or even the glimpses of the adulterous Bathsheba. In “Part 3 – Hope”, evidently the only Jewish woman in over 500 years from Judea to Babylon and back to Jerusalem is Mary, who was flirting with a young, virile Joseph in synagogue before she got virginally pregnant with “The King of the Jews”. I stopped watching once Jesus met John doing baptisms. (updated 3/29/2013)

Joan & Melissa: Joan Knows Best? - Joan and Melissa Rivers – 3rd season (on WE) I kept meaning to watch the rest of the 2nd season and all the 3rd season of their “reality series” but I downloaded them to make room on my DVR, so I just may yet watch them eventually, if the copy works.
Joan also appeared on the TV Land sitcom Hot In Cleveland as “Anka” in the episode “Bye George, I Think He's Got It!”, written by Rachel Sweet, but I neglected to watch it, either originally or rerun in memorial tribute, to see if she played an explicit Jewish character. (updated 10/5/2014)

On Raising Hope (on Fox), I still have to catch satirical episode “Burt Mitzvah: The Musical”, written by Paul A. Kaplan and Mark Torgove, to comment on this family of scammers taking advantage of matriarch guest star Shirley Jones claiming to have Jewish roots, including the musical number "Rock the Torah” set in a deli. (1/2/2014)

On Children’s Hospital (Cartoon Channel’s Adult Swim), the deliciously hilarious satire of Grey's Anatomy and other such hospital soaps, in the “Wisedocs” episode, written by series creator Rob Corddry, David Krumholtz, who pretty much always plays a smart Jewish character, is here “Dookie”, a Mafioso’s dim-witten son who is flirting with “Dr. Cat Black” (played by Lake Bell): My dad says I should ask you out. She fends him off with a revelation near end of the 4th season that contradicts her declaring herself not Jewish in another episode as a reason she was breaking up with the Jewish doctor, but then her character has also died and had amnesia a couple of times: Really? You’re sure your family wouldn’t mind if we dated? Because I’m Jewish and I’m terrible at keeping a secret. He: Why would they care about that? They kiss in the corridor. He: Wow, I can’t wait to tell my dad I’m in love with a blabbermouth Jewish broad who kisses like a black chick! She defends him as he’s arrested by the deaf cop that he’s not like the rest of his family, but he admits he is: Goodbye human Kat. Or in your people’s language - ‘Meow’. (updated 3/1/2013)

I mostly watch a Lifetime movie for seasonal December dilemma promotion of interfaith relationships, so I didn’t expect to see one for Black History Month, let alone just a week after one celebrating Coretta Scott King and Betty Shabazz’s friendship: Twist of Faith, teleplay by Joyce Gittlin, Janet Fattal & Stephen Tolkin, story by Gittlin and Fattal. An Orthodox cantor in Brooklyn “Yaakov Fischer” (played by David Julian Hirsh) is happily and lovingly married to “Ruth” (played by Kyra Zagorsky), with 3 kids, including 2 daughters, “Miriam” and “Sarah”. (While he teaches a male class at a yeshiva, he teaches his daughter a secular song on the piano – “Itsy Bitsy Spider”.) He spends Shabbat with his mother (played by Paula Shaw) and sister “Naomi” (played by Gina Leon). His wife complains that he has to work on furniture because he isn’t paid full-time as a synagogue cantor – see, he’s a Jewish carpenter. He walks his family to the bus stop on a Sunday, when he’s going to stay home to watch sports, but one of the daughters is quickly accosted by a punk teen, the wife calls over the busdriver, but the volatile (white) kid pulls out a gun, and shoots dead first the driver, then the family. (Gosh, that’s quite a mass killing in a quiet Brooklyn neighborhood.) At the shiva, the sister expects him to be already getting over it all, so no wonder he escapes in shock and roams the countryside anonymously – until he ends up at a gospel church choir in Alabama with singer Toni Braxton’s single mom “Nina”. His worried female relatives contact the police, and he finally sends them a card just to let them know he’s alive. Starting to fall for “Nina”, he kisses her, but flees home, explaining his behavior to his mother: I couldn’t breathe without them. Mom: Baruch hashem, you’re back. He weeps over his wife’s headstone (dated 1979-2012), so presumably this is 11 months after her murder. Mom can tell he’s depressed: Where did you go Yaakov? Did you leave your heart there? You can tell me. Evidently he told her the whole story, and who he’s now in love with doesn’t bother him, but rather the timing: With Ruth barely cold!. . I shouldn’t have let it happen. . .Too soon. . .Not fair to Ruth or the children. Mom is surprisingly encouraging: It is not right for a man to have his heart in two places. He argues he has his work in Brooklyn.: It’s over. Mom quotes a rabbi who would doubtless object to know his words from A Narrow Bridge, a tribute to Chedva of Shemiras Ha-lashon, were being used to justify an interfaith relationship: Always be happy. He objects: There’s other ways to happiness than running away. Mom: Maybe that’s what you were doing when you came home. Just when the African-American family is about to leave to find him in Brooklyn, as they have just figured out he’s Jewish from some Hebrew scrawls he left behind, he shows up at their front door for a big hug and kiss finale in front of the church that fills the screen. (2/10/2013)

On Upstairs Downstairs (shown in the U.S. on PBS), the “The Love That Pays the Price” episode by series 2 creator Heidi Thomas, continued the story line of the German-Jewish refugee girl “Lotte” into Autumn 1938, who is now under the guardianship of the upstairs family, building up to the organization of the first Kindertransport (more commentary forthcoming). (10/17/2012)

In the 2nd season of Episodes (on Showtime), in “Episode Three” written by series creators David Crane and Jeffrey Klarik, the first explicitly Jewish woman was at least glimpsed around slimey studio executive “Merc Lapidus” (played by John Pankow) – his weeping mother at his father’s Jewish funeral. (9/8/2012)

In Amy Sherman-Palladino’s new small town California dance studio show Bunheads (ABC Family), writer/director Daniel Palladino stuck in a Jewish woman wisecrack in the “Blank up, It’s Time” episode. Amidst an Astaire/Rogers tribute rehearsal, short “Carl Cramer” (played by Casey J. Adler) in tuxedo asks his much taller blonde dance partner: Tonight you should come over to my house and watch “This Entertainment”. I’d loan it to you but it’s my mom’s and she’s not in to loaning. I’ll whip us up a lasagna for dinner. . . .From scratch. . .My grandmother taught me. How a lifelong Jew learned to make a killer lasagna I don’t know, but she taught me and it’s the best. But her BFFs make her reluctantly turn down the tempting request with a lame diet excuse.
In the episode “Channing Tatum is A Fine Actor”, written by Daniel Palladino, “Carl” insists that the girlfriend “Boo Jordan” (played by Kaitlyn Jenkins) meet his parents. But she gets unfortunate advice from her dance teacher, who obviously has never met a Jewish mother: Be whoever the parents want you to be, and say whatever you think they want you to say. “Boo” thought she was going to say “be yourself” but is hopeful: Good, because I don’t exactly know who I am. The ensuing dialogue at the “Hunan Garden” restaurant would be an offensive portrayal of an annoying Jewish mother if, well, “”Mrs. Cramer” didn’t sound more natural than a caricature, as played by Gilmore Girls aluma Alex Borstein. As his parents argue about ordering too little vs. having left-overs and the mother insists on more string beans, “Carl” whispers to “Boo”: It’s a Cramer family tradition. We never order enough food. . . Then we order too much. Mom addresses “Boo”: You’ll eat more food, right?. . Please call me Sweetie, everyone calls me Sweetie. . . Do you like pork? “Boo”: Yes! Mom, quickly: Ugh, because I do not. “Boo” just as quickly: Neither do I. Mom zings: So which is it-- you like pork or you don’t? The girl goes into a tortured cover-up explanation. “Carl” interrupts: Just order the pork, Mom. Dad speaks up: This is why the whole world hates us. Mom: Nobody hates us., and keeps ordering and arguing with her husband. Mom turns to the girl and motions around her own face: So what’s going on here? Are you Jewish? Girl stalls carefully: I could be. “Carl” interrupts quickly: She isn’t Jewish, Mom. Mom pursues: So what is this? I’m seeing a lot of Eastern Europe. Poland, maybe Hungary. The girl parries: Do you like eastern Europe? Mom muses: Depends on the era. (Or did she say area?) Carl tries to change the subject with an anecdote, but Mom interrupts: I do not need to hear this story again, and neither does your little girlfriend. Now I am here to get to know her, not you. So, Boo, does your famiy ski? To “Carl”s surprise she says yes. Mom: God I hate skiers. “Boo” quickly: I mean no. Mom even quicker: Really, because I was going to say that I hate them because they get to ski. I would love to ski but I never learned how. . . Maybe you could teach me. Mom and Dad get distracted over the string beans order. Mom: But Boo wanted those string beans, didn’t you Boo? “Carl” again tries to change the topic, to Boo’s dancing. Mom: Carl raves about your dancing. The girl is modest. But Mom sees a topic of conversation: Who’s your favorite ballerina? Carl tries to help with a list,but Mom waves him away: Is your name Boo? So, who do you like? Gelsey Kirkland? “Boo” quickly affirms. “Mom” stage whispers: Terrible cocaine problem. The girl switches to No. Mom hones in: No? She didn’t have a terrible cocaine problem? . . .She wrote a book, a whole book about snorting cocaine, about quitting cocaine. . .You’re a ballerina, surely you have a favorite? Who’s your favorite? But the girl had followed the teacher’s advice to set an alarm for relief at 90 minutes and jumps up saying she has to go to the bathroom. Mom is confused: You set an alarm to remind you to go to the bathroom? As the girl walks away, she listens in on the family’s continued conversation. Mom: What kind of person sets an alarm to tell her to go to the bathroom. “Carl”: Mom, will you back off? You’re making her nervous! Mom: Please, she showed up nervous. Carl, this girl -- she’s like a loaf of unbaked bread. “Carl”: Mom don’t do this! Mom: This one has no opinions. She’s skiis, she doesn’t. “Carl”: Stop! Mom: She’s from Poland, she’s not from Poland. “Carl”: She never said she was from Poland. And you don’t know her. But you better get to know her because she’s the one that I like. I could marry this girl. Mom: You talk about marrying this girl – you’re in high school! All of which panics “Boo” even more, and she later confronts “Carl” with an hysterical plan for their young married future, but “Carl” tamps her down: I didn’t mean it literally. My mother, I love her, but she yaps, and she doesn’t listen. The only way I can get her to shut up is to be ridiculously dramatic. “Boo”: So I’m not just a loaf of unbaked bread? “Carl”: No, you’re fully baked. And they kiss. So, Ladies and Gentlemen, we have a new perspective on The Eternal Appeal of the Shiksa: Compared to Mom, she’s not only blonde, she’s bland. (updated 1/16/2013)

In the premiere of the 8th, and final, season of Weeds (on Showtime), “Messy”, series creator Jenji Kohan finally dealt with a subject she’s avoided about “Nancy Botwin” (Mary Louise Parker). As she lies in a coma from a gunshot, her family gathers in the hospital waiting room. Her older son “Silas” (Hunter Parrish): Will we bury her next to Dad? His Jewish uncle “Andy” (Justin Kirk): Can’t. He’s buried in a Jewish cemetery. “Nancy”s sister “Jill” (Jennifer Jason-Leigh): She took conversion classes before “Silas” was born. “Andy”: She never actually finished them, didn’t she? “Jill”: I don’t know. She took the classes. “Silas”: Mom eats cheeseburgers and shrimp. We’ve had Christmas trees every year. “Andy”: Like most Jews. Maybe she did convert. . .I can pull the plug for her. She did that for Bubbe. But she seemed to have forgotten what she learned in the episode “Threshold”, by Brendan Kelly, when she offered her new rabbi (younger) lover a lunch of ham and cheese. But he anyway invited her to Shabbos dinner with his “old, close friends”, two couples, both with presumably Jewish women, with one married to an African-American. One of the curly-haired, brunette wives, played by Meredith Scott Lynn, a bit coarsely feels out this new girlfriend on the benefits of pomegranate juice, then makes a joke about a new sushi place: Torah Sushi -- where half the selections are for people with faith, so chef’s choice, and half are for those who don’t have faith – with directions to the nearest McDonald’s. That drives “Nancy” into the kitchen, where she sees a photo on the fridge of the rabbi with his late wife. The jokester follows her in and apologizes: Did we come on too strong?. . .We just want to see Dave happy, and he seems happy lately. . That was taken at the seder two years ago. It’s only been 15 months. She listens in avidly from the dining room as “Nancy” still in the kitchen confesses her pot dealing to the rabbi and breaks up with him. “Nancy”s description of the break-up leads her brother-in-law to Google photos of his rabbinical school lover Yael Hoffman, from an earlier season, and repeating her first name over and over. In “God Willing and the Creek Don’t Rise” episode by Stephen Falk, he’s back in California ruminating about her: Yael of rabbinical school. Yael of sharp tongue and eyebrows like throwing blades at the Mossad. His nephew is disgusted: You came to bone her? His uncle: Back to her. But when he goes to the college she doesn’t recognize him, though she’s barely recognizable with long dyed blonde hair and bangs. The series finale “It’s Time – Part 1”, by Jenji Kohan, was set several years hence, when “Nancy” had married “Rabbi Bloom” and been widowed, again. He had adopted her son “Stevie” by the drug kingpin, so that as her extended family gathers for his bar mitzvah, he is described as “half-Mexican, half-Jewish”, but, in Part 1, there was no indication that she had converted, let alone there were no other Jewish girls or women around.
”Part 2”, by Kohan, finally fills in clarifications. “Stevie”, having just found out about his biological father, makes announcements in his bar mitzvah speech: David Bloom adopted me and I love him very much. . . My mother is Methodist. She converted for Dave, but seriously, once a Methodist, always a Methodist. The man I called ‘Dad” all my life was Jewish. I’m not Jewish. My brothers are half-Jewish. I’m not chosen. I don’t choose to be. . .I call bullshit on this whole show for family and friends to feel good about. I don’t know who I am. He declares that he rejects all religion, and an Asian girl sitting next to him on the bimah named “China” (played by Catherine Chan) speaks up that she, too, is adopted and therefore she’s not Jewish. Her lesbian mothers in the congregation call out: You are Jewish and we love you! “Nancy” explains to “Stevie” why she’s going ahead with the party: Technically, you are Jewish. You had a bris, you entered into the covenant. Andy insisted on it. If anyone is your real father, it’s him. Son: Just what I need is more fathers. . .Your history is very confusing to me. At least the family joins in for one last toke in the snow at the end. (updated 11/25/2012)

On The Mentalist (CBS), the “Devil’s Charry” episode by Daniel Cerone, had a murdered diamond cutter, so, of course, he was Jewish. His tearful daughter “Madeline Mendelssohn” (played by Charlene Amoia), who lived with him but was at her remote cabin in Big Sur for solitude on the night of his death, describes him: He was raised not to trust security services. His father was a German Jew. He survived the Holocaust. Banks stole the family money. So she’s just a freighted set-up to explain why he had the big diamond with him. (10/8/2012)

Happily Divorced (on TV Land) managed a second season for Fran Drescher’s sitcom à clef, but I didn’t want to spend the time watching what last year seemed like a dreadfully unfunny comedy no matter that here character “Fran Lovett”, along with family and friends, were explicitly identified as Jewish. (10/5/2014)

In The L.A. Complex (Canadian series showing/streaming in the U.S. as a summer show on The CW), the penultimate episode of the 2nd season, “Xs and Os”, written by Brendan Gall, the struggling comic “Nick” (played by Joe Dinicol) had a gig at a network executive’s party. But it turned out to be the bat mitzvah of the guy’s daughter, and he had to dress as a rabbit. As his hyper girlfriend jealously commented in a call: Great, there must be dozens of celebrity parents there, the party planner scolded him for talking on the phone in costume and trying to take the head off, and resorted to cliché: No, no no, Chuck never breaks character! Do you see that girl right there? Today is the most important day of her life. Today she leaves childhood behind and becomes a woman. . . You take the head off, you don’t get paid., when the comic protested (I didn’t take down his whole rant): If she’s a woman she knows there’s a man inside sweating. A magician advised him: See that clown? He’s on the way out. We’re the future – mitzvah wise. When the comic quickly cleaned up his act to perform next to a huge pink-framed photo of the bat mitzvah girl, the 12 year old girls cheered at his Justin Bieber and vampire references that substituted for his usual sex talk, and they called him back for a standing ovation encore. He was happily surprised to make $500, but was not happy to be invited into “the mitzvah circuit” as a “bunny comedian”. (9/30/2012)

American Horror Story: Asylum (on FX, out on DVD) found a new excuse for the sadism on excruciating display all this season in “I Am Anne Frank”, Part 1 episode written by Jessica Sharzer. Set in 1964, a woman, played by Franka Potente, who was unfortunately underused in the first season of Copper, explains why she’s been sent there in an involuntary psychiatric hold after her violent response to an anti-Semitic incident at a bar. She heard a guy say: ’Don’t let them Jew you down.’ I stabbed him with a beer bottle. They’ll live, but they will never forget. The crazy nun who runs the place (played by Jessica Lange) is unusually sympathetic, for her: I’m not unmoved to the atrocities your people suffered in the war. Did you lose people in the war? The patient just whistles (which could be a reference to the killer’s signature tune in Fritz Lang’s M but neither me nor my husband thought it sounds like "In the Hall of the Mountain King" from the Peer Gynt suite by Edvard Grieg). She’s next seen writing to “Kitty”, as in the diary: The walls are closing in. I can hardly breathe. It’s Amsterdam all over again. But there are eyes everywhere. The eyes of madness and disease. These people here are resigned to die here. We were never resigned. We always hung onto a shred of hope. She freaks out at seeing the sadistic “Dr. Arthur Arden” (played by James Cromwell) and identifies herself: You were there! Auschwitz! Nazi! Nazi swine! Don’t you remember me Doctor? I’m Anne. Anne Frank! The nun wryly confronts her: What a relief it will be to school children to know you survived. “Anne”: You think I’m crazy. Nun: Anne Frank died in Bergen Belsen in 1945, just weeks before the camp was liberated. Anne: There were so many bodies when the Allies arrived, thousands buried in mass graves. But I wasn’t one of them. I was too sick to tell anyone my name, even if someone asked my name and no one asked. The Brits nursed us back to some semblance of health. Afterwards, I kept to the streets in Germany, a pickpocket, a thief. And then I met a soldier, Pvt. William Snow of Rutherford, NJ. He saved me. He brought me to America. . .I’m a widow. He was called back to service in Korea. He was killed there in 1952, the same year my diary was published in America. And I realized then that my father had survived the war. Nun: And you made no attempt to contact your father? “Anne”: I wanted to at first. But he had a new family, a new life. But because of the diary, people finally started to pay attention to us, what they had done to us. All because of a martyred 15-year-old. She had to stay 15 and a martyr. I could do more good dead than alive. Nun: Your story is indecent. “Anne”, whose monologue is illustrated with black-and-white flashbacks to the Auschwitz barracks: No, you’re indecent! You have a Nazi war criminal working here. . .He was Hans Gruber then. I saw him the night we arrived in Auschwitz. He seemed kind, gentle. He said he couldn't treat us all, so he'd flip a coin to decide who to take. I remember thinking they were lucky. But no one was lucky in Auschwitz. . . He would visit us regularly in the women’s barracks, bringing chocolates and sweets. When they came back, if they came back, they were changed. She shows the skeptical nun her number tattoo. (I’ve seen one poster claim the number is inaccurate.) After the cop who brought “Anne” to the asylum questions the doctor, the doctor attacks her: You don’t know you who are! Anne Frank – she died! Or didn’t you bother to read the book? Your lies have caused me a great deal of embarrassment. He insists he’s from Scottsdale, Az. But she pulls out a gun she had lifted from the cop and demands he confess: Are you going to do to me what you did to those girls at Auschwitz? Confess! She shoots him in one leg and threatens the other, until she gets the key to his locked door – behind which she finds the woman he’s been subjecting to hideous surgery.
I’m surprised that other commenters have found this episode offensive, though this is an endlessly over-the-top series anyway. Maybe non-Jews have turned Anne Frank into more of a sacrosanct icon than Jews with relatives who died in the Holocaust (I’m named for a great-uncle who died at Auschwitz) who can already personalize the six million. I had no interest in joining the l-o-n-g lines visiting her hiding place; I instead stood outside the apartment in Amsterdam where my friend’s mother and grandmother were successfully hidden, and the store of her uncle who was taken -- and did not live to return. At least AfterEllen’s Jeff Jensen added some useful references for the episode. Joan Rivers, in the version of her one-woman act shown on Showtime this year as Don’t Start With Me, even included an Anne Frank joke: I flew on Lufthansa Airlines. I opened the overhead and Anne Frank fell out: “I’m an orphan!” She wrote one book! There was no ending! When audience members reacted with discomfort, Rivers retorted, as she did throughout the show: Grow up! She continued on with Auschwitz jokes, particularly about the gift shop. However, Rivers was castigated by the Anti-Defamation League for making a comparable joke on the 2013 Oscars Special Edition of Fashion Police. Checking out what German-American supermodel Heidi Klum was wearing: “The last time a German looked this hot was when they were pushing Jews into the ovens.” But it’s not the first time the ADL has been shocked, shocked by how she pokes at the sacrosanct. Wilfred, a few months later in June (3rd season on FX in the U.S. adaptation of the Australian comedy), in the “Uncertainty” episode by Reed Agnew and Eli Jorné, continued mordantly making Anne Frank jokes, as the obnoxious dog (played by Jason Gann in both versions) claimed he was not a hallucination of his mentally ill neighbor, but a magic dog, a mythical being: I’m remembering certain things from my past. Yes, it’s 1945. There was a little girl, Anne, Anne Frank. . .Anne and her rules. No walks, no trips to the groomers. In the end, I just snapped. I just screamed at her – ‘Anne! I’m dying here! How come we never leave the house!’ Thank God those well-dressed German men heard my barking and broke into the attic. Those brave heroes rescued me. (updated 9/17/2013)

At the opening of “Part 2”, by Brad Falchuk, “Anne Frank” is holding a gun on the doctor: This man is a monster! You should see what he has in his office! . . .I’ve waited so many years for this! I can wait a few more minutes. But she’s grabbed, and is next seen in a straightjacket on a bed, still protesting about the doctor: He would have killed me! Gruber – I told you! I hope he dies! A man comes in identifying her as his wife “Charlotte Brown” – but her maiden name was “Cohen” (though her real Jewish identity is never referred to again in the episode as adding to her identification with Frank). He explains that she was always “high-strung”, that after they saw the play in Boston when she was pregnant, she read the book, went to the library, and read up about Auschwitz, but it got worse after their baby was born: She went on about babies who were gassed and tortured. There’s flashbacks to her room full of clippings and research, where she ignores her crying son “David”: He’s not the one who needs me! The shrink stops by, who we find out later in the episode is a serial killer, and immediately diagnoses “post partum psychosis”. Her husband notes: She’s a very emotional person. In the asylum, she rejects him and goes on about Gruber, but she has a visceral reaction to a family photo with him and the baby, and agrees to return home. But next she’s being dragged back screaming as the perplexed husband pleads: Charlotte’s not normal. She’s worse. You have to take her. I can’t handle her. She’s locked in a padded room and into the treatment of the evil doctor who gets her husband to agree to a lobotomy. (PBS’s American Experience episode on ”The Lobotomist” sadly shows this was a realistic element in this episode.) She’s next seen as a perfect Stepford wife and mother: I have never been happier., while her husband throws out her Holocaust research, and the camera closes in on a photograph of a Nazi who looks like a younger version of the doctor.
The Nazi doctor had a gruesome memory of a Jewish woman inmate to taunt the demonically possessed nun in the “Unholy Night” episode by James Wong, oddly playing on the legends of Jews hiding jewels in the camps rather than the truth of stolen gold fillings. He presents “Sister Mary Eunice” (played by Lily Rabe) with a Christmas present of improbably big ruby chandelier style earrings and explains their awful provenance as she admires them and preens in a mirror: They belonged to a Jewess in the camp. She was always reminding people that she was a woman of considerable means and that her husband was an influential and wealthy doctor in Berlin. She was always complaining to me about her stomach problems and as a doctor I thought I should do something about it. I followed her one day, thinking I might dignose her condition and take a stool sample. She was on her hands and knees picking through her own feces to retrieve those earrings. She confessed to me that she swallowed them every day, day after day, carrying them around inside her as if she might return to her former grandeur. Ridiculous woman. She died from internal bleeding. The earrings were very hard on her intestines. Obviously, I retrieved them. I knew that some day I would meet someone who was worthy of their exceptional beauty. The smiling nun: You were very clever to retrieve them. Look how beautiful they are on me. They bring out the rose in my cheeks!. The doctor: I so dearly hoped you’d throw them back in my face, that you couldn’t stand to touch those shit-stained earrings. I was hoping there’d be a glimmer of horror. (updated 12/15/2012)

In Covert Affairs (on USA, available on DVD) “This Is Not America” episode by Julia Ruchman, the secret agent went to Israel – but she only encountered a faux Jewish woman, an Iranian agent with long curly, dark hair going by the name “Ilana Ben Ashkol” (played by Sarah Podemski), who convinced American scientist “Isaac Reiss” he “found love” and he even wants to learn how to say sweetheart in Hebrew for her: We met at a farmers’ market, buying organic pomegranates. She’s a scientist, too. She’s the first person I’ve been with who understands what I do. Meanwhile, the returning Mossad agent “Eyal Lavine” (played by Oded Fehr), returning in the 3rd season watches from afar his son, to whom he years ago gave up custody to his ex-wife.
”Eyal” saved “Agent Annie Walker” from a Russian prison in the “Rock 'n' Roll Suicide”, setting up their relationship in the next “Wishful Beginnings” episode, also by Julia Ruchman. He walks into CIA Headquarters at Langley with a character rarely seen on TV – a mature female Mossad boss, “Rivka Singer”, played by Tovah Feldshuh, in her full Golda’s Balcony mode (the William Gibson play she toured extensively). She’s a tough negotiator with her female CIA counterpart over sharing intelligence about a compromised informant against the Saudis, is sarcastic about their following laws - American rules – so baffling!-- and thinks “Agent Annie Walker” is reckless, though her subordinate “Eyal” defends her. (Nice touch to have the two Mossad agents speak Hebrew together when they’re alone.) “Rivka” teases if he's sleeping with her. He says no, but she smirks: Why not? It might speed things along. After he protectively sets up “Annie” in his own D.C. apartment, he joins “Rivka” in her car to hand over the intel “Annie” gave him against her boss’s instructions: So, you are the right man for this job., and gets him to agree to the next steps in her plan, but he lies to her about where “Annie” is staying.
”Rivka” was back in “Scary Monsters (and Super Creeps)”, by Tamara Becher, admitting that the CIA had proven intel she had passed on to them was faked: I’m afraid I owe you an apology on behalf of me and my agency. . . .We were not the only ones who were duped. She confesses that the agency has a “black eye” – that “Eyal” has gone rogue, which he admits to “Annie” and tells her about a woman in Amsterdam he turned into an asset (and fell for) who was discovered and killed. But at the end of the episode, he reports back to “Rivka”, who slips in and out of Hebrew with him: You had a role to play here, for Mossad and Eretz Israel. But he’s distraught at losing “Annie”s trust. “Rivka” promises him a desk job in Tel Aviv, but he quits. “Rivka”: What is happening here is much larger than you know. We’ve all had to play our parts. We’ve all had to pay the price. “Eyal” is bitter: What you lost in this grandiose scheme? “Rivka”: You. He walks out. (updated 11/12/2012)

In the 2nd U.S. season of Strike Back (on Cinemax, out on DVD), in Episodes 15 and 16 written by Richard Zajdlic, a very sexy assassin turns out to be a Mossad agent ”Rebecca Levy”. (While she makes no explicitly Jewish reference, she does comment about being Israeli, so I figure she’s not a putative Jewish woman.) The 2006 source book by Chris Ryan was set in Lebanon rather than the “prequel” storyline in Iraq. “Rebecca” (played by tall, dark, and beautiful Belgian actress Lyn Renée) is first seen as a flight attendant at the Cape Town Airport trailing a retired nuclear scientist. She flirts her way past Section 20 agent “Sgt. Damien Scott” (Aussie Sullivan Stapleton playing an American working for the Brits) into the closed circuit security TV center with a sly I’m going to see my boyfriend., murders the security guard, and gives efficient directions to her team. She’s next seen in a package delivery disguise, point blank shoots another old nuclear scientist living on a fancy estate, and strides past the dead body of his security guard. She does look thoughtfully pensive as a colleague drives their getaway car. Meanwhile, the British intelligence service has identified an explosive used against Section 20 in the chase as an Israeli weapon previously deployed against an Iranian nuclear scientist. It’s explained that Israel helped South Africa develop their nuclear program in the 1980’s, and have since “made sure they do nothing against them”. “Rebecca” next appears chatting up “Scott” at a bar as if he had been a passenger on her plane. Next they’re having brutal sex, with she on top strangling him and he squeezing her breasts hard. He protests the condom broke (with his regular couplings even in the most dangerous situations around the world, I don’t recall he ever stopped for a condom before, and maybe this will come back to haunt him later in the series), and she purrs: I want you to come in me. As she dresses, he turns coy: Was that even sex? I’ve had easier cage fights than that. She mocks: Men never admit about physical fighting with each other – how intimate it is. He: You know, you fuck like I used to. She: How’s that? He: Like you stopped believing. Later at the safe house, the scientist notes that that the Israelis had insisted everything be destroyed, but then the house immediately comes under attack. Next we see “Rebecca” shooting a machine gun at “Scott”s car. They point guns at each other and he mutters: Fuckin’ bitch. She doesn’t shoot him - - because she had placed a tracker on him. He finally figures that out and jumps into a water tank to disable it. At the cliff hanger, they’re again pointing guns at each other. At the next episode, she backs off: You’re not my target. He turns uncharacteristically insightful: I know what you’re doing. I was trained to do the same thing. You depersonalize at all times, that they’re not real people. But he’s here to save his family, not threaten Israel., in reference to the scientist. She: What do you know? He: I know you don’t have to kill him, just rescue some hostages. She: No. He: It might help you sleep better at night. She: I sleep fine. But she next appears at his apartment door at night. He: Trouble sleeping? She talks about the case. He: So what are you doing here? They make love, with missionary position counting as more romantic than his usual rigorous doggy style quickies in this premium cable display of female nudity and male behinds. He even kisses her afterwards, and, whoa, they spoon. She: You still think I’m only using you? He: I don’t care if you are. . . They discuss the case and who she’ll be assigned to target. She: Maybe they will. There’s always one more person to kill. He: You could just walk away, disappear. They can’t hand you the next file if they can’t find you. She: Did you ever put your gun in your own mouth? He: That’s the day you should quit. She: It’s our mess. We helped build those weapons. He: Walk away. She: To where? He: Promise you’ll try. Shocker – they cuddle! Back at headquarters, his female boss shows surveillance photos of the two together. He: You missed the ones of us fucking. Boss explicitly warns: She’s Mossad. She’s an assassin. He: Yeah, and she wants to quit. Just as the Section 20 agents secure the scientist and his family, she shoots him, and “Scott” instinctively shoots at her. He reaches out to her bloody body: What the fuck did you do that for? She: This is my way out. I needed you to kill me. He: You’re not going to die from these wounds. You’ve got your out. Promise me. Hold on tight. You’re going to get out. She: I promise. (Very operatic.) Later, his boss reports not finding her: She’s a ghost. In the following episode, by John Simposon, the blonde CIA agent he’s been banging is jealous :I heard about the Mossad agent – Rebecca Levy. . .Is it true you couldn’t kill her? He: Not I couldn’t, I wouldn’t. She sneers: Redemption in a bullet? He: She was looking for a way out. (updated 8/7/2013)

In Major Crimes (on TNT, available on DVD), the re-boot continuation of The Closer, which never had any Jewish women in its Los Angeles, “The Ecstasy and the Agony” episode, by Adam Belanoff, had an exaggerated Beverly Hills-type Israeli mob wife. “Roma Strauss” (played by Necar Zadegan) wore a Jewish star as she shrieked about her Israeli-born, American-naturalized husband being gunned down at her front door, who was about to go into witness protection for ratting out his close cousin/business partner in importing ecstasy and laundering money through B-movie productions: They wanted to send us to Oklahoma. To Tulsa! As if anyone would believe we are the McDougalls! FBI agent: Ma’am, that was just one option. In her interrogations, she answers every question with a resentful question, such as: You think you have to know everything? She yells at the cousin: Don’t threaten me! I know things! Why would I murder Elon when you were going to do it for me?. . .Want to know what we were planning? Divorce! She nags her 14-year-old son “Avi”: So it would kill you to have a glass of water?. . .That’s enough water!. . .Don’t worry, I’m going to get you a better dad. It turns out she told everything to her life coach, who turned it into a movie treatment: He gave me a reason to get up in the morning. He’s helping me find myself. Neither of us wants to be in Tulsa. She’s more upset that her “intuitive life strategist” was sleeping with the other Israeli mob wives too: Some of them were fairly attractive, and they were paying me. (The delicious irony was intended that he was played by Michael Weatherly, whose law enforcement character on NCIS has considerable “shipper” tension with an Israeli agent.) When her son confesses to the murder because he, too, didn’t want to move to Tulsa, the cops offer her a plea deal for her information so he’ll be treated as a juvenile: He was protecting his mother. You can’t blame a son for doing that, can you? (9/5/2012)

In the 2nd season Alphas (on SyFy) “Gaslight” episode, written by Terri Hughes Burton and Ron Milbauer, “Anna Levy” (played by Liane Balaban), the autistic, or whatever, leader of last season’s Red Flag rebellion of People With Special Abilities, came back as an apparition, after a surprisingly specific Jewish headstone unveiling at her grave. Though I don’t recall her having a Jewish identity, the year-later memorial was a convenient story-line. Her somewhat more talkative autistic, government agent boyfriend “Gary” interrupts the rabbi to talk about her: She’s not with us. She doesn’t live on – that’s the problem! Why does he get to talk? He’s lying! Anna wasn’t peaceful – she was a rebel! Now she’s a dead rebel. . . I didn’t get any catharsis. . .Where do I put my stone? When she appears to him, through another Alpha’s electromagnetic Special Ability, they can now talk to each other: You’re not real, but I like seeing you. The doctor gets him to give her up to save another’s life, and she kisses him goodbye. But he found another way to honor Anna, as he Tweets The revolt is coming. “@Annalives”, which SyFy is using for their social media promotions of the series. (8/25/2012)

In the second season opener of the New York-set Suits (on USA, summers), “She Knows”, written by series creator Aaron Korsh, the whole law firm turns out for the Jewish funeral of “Alicia Hardman” the wife, dead of breast cancer, of senior partner “Daniel” (David Costabile). When his competitor in the firm had found out he was taking money from client escrow accounts, he had taken time off over the last five years ostensibly to care for her, though later in the season an affair is revealed. He’s pleased that he also used the time get to know better his daughter “Sarah” (played by Natalie Krill). He’s proud she just graduated high school and is on her way to Harvard. The competing partner’s ally pays a shiva call, not that it’s called that but he does bring food) and finds “Sarah” grief-stricken. He threatens her father with exposure to his daughter in order not to get him to return to the firm. But he’s outfoxed when the father not only confesses to the staff about the funds he “borrowed” but tells the negotiator I told my daughter everything. In the “Asterisk” episode, written by Justin Peacock, “Louis Litt” (played by Rick Hoffman) says he’ll first tell his rabbi about his promotion in the law firm, then he’s skyping with his kvetchy parents. Mom: Partner? Senior partner? It all sounds the same to me. . . .Louie, I don’t want to die before I see my grandchildren. He protests that his sister “Esther” has children, but his father challenges that they’re not “Litts”. Mom perks up at an interruption: Is that Harvey Spector? It’s about time I met your best friend. . . and “Louis” quickly closes his lap top to cover up his lie about this relationship to her. (updated 9/15/2012)

Inside Amy Schumer Comedy Central promoted her new sketch series in advance with Amy Schumer: Mostly Sex Stuff, a filmed, bleeped version of her stand-up routine. The comedienne makes one comment to establish her ethnic identity when she runs through a bit about how long it takes women to get ready for a night out compared to men as she holds out her straight blonde hair: This Jew-denial took like 50 minutes. In the first episode, “Bad Decisions”, she does man-on-the-street interviews, in what looks like NYC, and asks a black man his ethnicity. She’s a bit surprised when he answers: West African. and even more when he rejoins: What’s yours? She: I’m kind of a Jew. He: I’m Muslim. She: As-salam alaykum. It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia’s September 2013 satire of her act, in “The Gang Broke Dee”, written by Charlie Day, Glenn Hoverton & Rob McElhenery, made only scatological references, not Jewish. (Further commentary on the rest of the season forthcoming. The co-executive producer and head writer is comedienne Jessi Klein.)
Interviewer Julie Seabaugh in “Variety’s 2014 Breakthrough in Comedy Winner: Amy Schumer”, posted 1/6/2014, just barely avoids saying she “doesn’t look Jewish” much less frankly than Schumer does in her act: “Bookers and producers quickly took notice of her long, blonde hair and all-American look. Schumer is forthright about the circumstances of her early breaks. ‘I was funny enough,’ she says in hindsight. ‘But I was probably marketable, and I was given opportunities that forced me to get stronger (as a comic).’”
Promotinoally playing “Not My Job” on NPR’s Wait Wait Don’t Tell Me, on 4/5/2014, she made an incorrect presumption when told the quiz questions would be about the baseball team House of Team: “I’m half-Jewish, so I’m half-confident.” (updated 4/15/2014)

Annie Edison in the 4th Season of Community (on NBC) The new showrunner for the last season, who took over from the series’ creator, conveniently remembered she’s Jewish in the 4th episode “Alternative Version of the German Invasion”, written by Ben Wexler. The study group is in the midst of a historically pun-filled conflict for space with the German students (who lost their foosball scholarship), and have captured the study room. Another nemesis, senior citizen “Leonard” (played by Richard Erdman accuses them: You’re like those guys on “Hogan’s Heroes” - Nazis! “Annie” challenges: You take that back! Then looks around and whispers: I’m Jewish. “Shirley Bennett” (played by African-American actress Yvette Nicole Brown): Don’t call us that! He cites: You’re wearing SS T-shirts! They are shocked that their promotional T-shirts for her business “Shirley’s Subs” with “SS” on the sleeves supports his contention. Later they figure the whole situation was really a lesson their new history teacher (played by Malcolm McDowell) set them up to learn (which it wasn’t). But they decide to give reparations by cleaning up the study room. (Further commentary on the rest of the season forthcoming.) (3/23/2013)

Deborah Gorn in the 1st season of Ripper Street (seen in the U.S. on BBC America) was introduced in the 2nd episode, “In My Protection”, by Richard Warlow. In 1889 London, an escaped, “Fagin”-led urchin falsely convicted of murder is identified as a “Christ-killer” who was “cut”, so “Det. Insp. Edmund Reid” (played by Matthew Macfadyen) tracks him down to “The Jewish Orphanage” run by “Deborah Goren” (played by Lucy Cohu, with flowing, brunette locks). Under the decorations of a large Jewish star and menorah, she’s not only caring and maternal to her charges, particularly the fugitive, but is feisty – she saves the Detective’s life when the killer is strangling him with a well-placed and timed blow to his head. She’s contrasted to the Detective’s cold wife who has retreated into strict Christianity and her church after the death of their daughter.
She re-appeared a couple of episodes later in “For The Good of This City”, written by Julie Rutterford & Richard Warlow, pleased to see the detective return: We are friends now. But he’s there for business – bringing her 2 children of a traumatized witness to a murder: It’s men who are the ruin of this family. She, ruefully: This family – and many like them. He: My wife would say the same. She’s regretful he brings up his wife, as she lingers over his handshake. Later that night, she’s attacked and the children stolen. He’s apologetic: All I bring you is violence and stress., but her concern is only for the kids. She’s also a bit disappointed to hand the recovered kids over to his wife at the Christian charity she runs.
In “Tournament of Shadows”, by Toby Finlay, she and Russian Jews in London are unusually portrayed not as helpless victims of pogroms, but as intellectuals and political refugees. “Deborah” comes to the Inspector to claim the body of the brother of the man she fled Kiev with, who the London police believe was an anarchist fomenting labor strife during a strike: The man I know was no bombmaker. . .I’ve seen enough of Russian soldiers to last me a lifetime. . .Why do you imagine so many have fled Russia?, and she fervently tells the Inspector about her belief in the dignity of the working man. When the police repress the strikers in a complicated scheme, she lets him know which side she is on: If this is civilization, count me curious to witness barbarism.. She strongly defends the dead man and challenges the inspector: He was unafraid to pursue the truth! When the police drive us from our homes, when they tortured with impunity, Joshua saved me! We come here because we thought we would be safe! Get out! Out! She pushes him against the wall, but that reveals scars on his neck, and he pours out the truth about the ship accident that sank his daughter, with his secret belief that somehow she’s still alive –and he kisses “Deborah” big time, and she responds, too. But they are interrupted by his shocked Sergeant with one of her orphans. He guiltily goes home to his wife to plead for her attention from her Christian activities: I need you! Before your shelter and your church! But not only does the wife walk out, she’s no longer wearing mourning weeds and is determined to clean out their daughter’s room.
In the season finale, “What Use Our Work” written by Richard Warlow, the Inspector turns to her for consolation after the death of a young police officer on his case. Incongruously, naked in bed together she speaks fervently of moral principles. With the scars from his ship accident visible as she holds him, she admonishes him about his thoughts that his daughter is still alive: The secret dream you have now that takes life. It’s not for you to share with me. Your daughter had a mother. I can not be the sounding board for your guilt. You seek forgiveness. I hope that your life will return to what it once was. I cannot provide these things to you. Please, you should go home. Even more incongruously, at the conclusion, he brings for her care the rescued orphan he’d hoped was his daughter – accompanied by his wife. updated 3/10/2013)

Felicity Smoak in the 1st season of Arrow (on CW, out on DVD) , in “Year’s End” episode, story by Greg Berlanti & Marc Guggenheim and teleplay by Andrew Kreisberg & Guggenheim, “Oliver Queen”s indispensable, shy, socially awkward, bespectacled IT employee/crack web searcher “Felicity Smoak” (played by attractive Emily Bett Rickards) surprisingly reacts I’m Jewish. when he wishes her “Merry Christmas”, so he quickly responds with “Happy Hanukkah”. The original DC Comic character, from the “Firestorm” series, is a businesswoman who manages a computer software company, but I don’t see any fan documentation that she’s Jewish.
In “Trust but Verify”, written by Gabrielle Stanton, he induces her help to break a computer code with a fake story of a scavenger hunt for bottles of rare Lafite-Rothschild wine. When she uncovers the real robbery plans, she ruefully realizes: So no wine, then.
Too bad there was no sense of her Jewish identity as she got a bigger role. In “The Odyssey”, story by Greg Berlanti & Andrew Kreisberg and teleplay by Kreisberg and Marc Guggenheim, “Oliver Queen” trust her enough to collapse on her door, letting her in on his secret identity so she can save his life. She admits she was suspicious about the research he had asked her to do, like checking out a bullet-ridden laptop: I may be blonde, but I’m not that blonde. She figures out how to fix the defibrillator paddles: I’ve been building computers since I was seven. Wires are wires. “Oliver”: Does that mean you’re in?. . .You’re practically an honorary member of the team. . . .Then why did you update my system? “Felicity” who had helped him further by hacking his blood sample out of the crime lab’s computers, noted Your system was from the ‘80’s, and not the good part of the ‘80’s, like Madonna and legwarmers. . .I’ll help you rescue [your stepfather]. He was nice to me. Then I’ll go back to my boring work as an IT Girl. And is there a bathroom because I’ve had to pee since I got here. (Further commentary on the rest of the season forthcoming.) (updated 9/17/2013)

Shoshanna Shapiro in the 2nd season of Girls (on HBO, out on DVD) In David Rensin’s interview with Lena Dunham, 3/14/2013, in Playboy: “One of the louder criticisms of Girls is that it takes place in a narrow world of young, urban, middle-class white women and is thus not suitably diverse and representative of your generation. Dunham: I think that’s a valid criticism, but we can’t let that erase someone’s ability to tell a personal story. While being racist and promoting inequality are crimes that should be punished, the sin of writing two Jewish girl characters and two Waspy characters feels less egregious to me. I’ve tried to be elegant about it and receive the criticism, and I understand what’s hard about it. At the same time I’m like, Really?”
In a pre-season interview on Charlie Rose, 1/11/2013, creator Lena Dunham corrects his description of the main characters as “two WASPs and two Jews”: “Well, I play a half-Jew. I’m a half-Jew in real life so I decided that on the show I would represent the bi-religious. But ‘Shoshanna Shapiro’ is full Jew. She was initially supposed to be the kind of character who bopped in to illuminate the difference between the Sex and the City New York and our New York, and then popped off to drink another Cosmo. She was not supposed to be a recurring character, but Zosia played her so beautifully that she became one. She’s a bit younger than the other girls, she’s a bit more innocent, she’s more outwardly ambitious. She’s fun to write because she talks so fast.”
”In Praise of the Sane TV Heroine” by Erin Coulehan, 3/14/2013 in Slate: “Shoshanna entered this season freshly de-virginized but was neither clingy or blasé about the experience. Throughout the season, she’s been the girl with the most guts and the most wit: It’s not easy to live with an over-30 and under-employed boyfriend while also putting up a friend in need, going to classes, and figuring out those funky hairstyles. But her character is equal parts compassionate and assertive, and that’s not crazy at all.
In anticipation of the 2nd season, a profile of “Zosia Mamet Is Still Getting Used to Being Your New Best Friend” by Taffy Brodesser-Akner in The New York Times, posted 1/2/2013, mentioned the actress’s sense of identity, but not her character’s (though comparisons were the theme of the article): In “Los Angeles, where she went to an Episcopal school — just because it was a good school, not for religious reasons; neither of her parents is Episcopalian, and she identifies as Jewish, like her father. ‘The only WASPy part of me is that I like gin. . .Oh, and I ride horses.’”
So while the first episode of the season, “It’s About Time”, by Dunham and Jennj Konner, doesn’t specifically give “Shoshanna” a Jewish reference, the positives about her characteristics as a Jewish woman outweigh the negatives, unlike most shows that are more grudging. She is first seen performing a spiritual cleansing ritual in her room, including the incantation: I thank the higher powers for all of the gifts that I have already received, like a keen mathematical mind and relatively fast-growing hair. She holds her head up high (with an adorably old-fashioned hat) when she comes to a party where she’s nervous that “Ray” will also be attending: I may be deflowered, but I am not devalued., though her then quoting Helen Reddy’s “I Am Woman” song from 1971 seemed age inappropriate. “Ray” corners her as she’s searching for her purse, rueful that: My computer tells me you’ve unfriended me on FaceBook. She: I didn’t feel like seeing you in my feed every morning. He: When I’m not around you, when you just send me a text of emojis, it’s so easy to dismiss you. She’s indignantly defensive: What’s wrong with emojis? He: A panda next to a gun next to a wrapped gift? It makes no sense! She, very fast: You weren’t very nice. You hurt me. OK, you hurt my feelings. But I can deal with it because I have my girl pants on. . . You don’t want to date me? That’s fine, because I don’t want to date you either, because I only want to date people who want to date me because that is called self-respect. But I do not have to like you, OK? You were never my friend, you were only my lover, and that is now over.. . .You rejected me and you are now insulting me so you do not get to have me like you now. He: Let me finish. When I’m around you, I remember, OK. I remember your charm, your innocence, your strength, this beautiful, fresh, vibrant sincerity. I wish Rachel on Glee will talk back like this at her age: I’m really tired of being insulted, even when it comes before a compliment, so I’m going to leave. And he grabs her for a big, romantic kiss.
In “It’s A Shame About Ray”, written by Dunham, “Shoshanna” starts out as flustered and embarrassed when she and “Ray” arrive late to “Hannah”s dinner party, until he, more than a bit smugly, announces: We're all adults, you can tell them we had sex. That's why we're late, because we had sex. She’s perturbed when the discussion turns to butt plugs, and she insecurely asks him: Do you want that? But she shifts from naïve to a growing realization about their relationship when living arrangements are discussed: He stays with me a lot – Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, and the weekend – Oh My God! Do you live with me? Where do you live when you’re not living in my house seven days a week?. . .If I had been informed of this fact. . . I could have bought some new sheets, or called my aunt!. . . I’m not okay, but we can talk about it when we get back to our shared home. She is still fuming about proprieties as they wait for the subway: You're older than me, you should have your own place. You can’t pay for anything. “Ray” is embarrassed at being called out by her, with the loveliest declaration to a young Jewish woman on TV (though fan sites have only posted the deprecating comments about himself): Just say it. I'm a huge fucking loser. You don't think I wasn’t counting down the days until you figured it out? Maybe I wasn’t that excited to tell my beautiful, smart, 21-year-old girlfriend that I’m a 35-year-old homeless guy whose one valuable possession . . .I’m a fucking loser in a lot of ways. What makes me worth dating? What makes me worth fucking anything? She: That I’m falling in love with you. He: It’s way too early to say something like that. As the subway rumbles into the station, she: I’m sorry. He: I love you so fucking much. Dunham’s commentary after the episode was quite revealing: “Shoshanna in many ways to me is the voice of wisdom in the show. She has a real moral content with real ability to be sort of intuitive about other people’s feelings that the other girls totally lack. That’s one of the reasons she can fall in love with “Ray”, whose kind of a complicated person. He’s a real curmudgeon, but she’s really coming to care about him.” Talking about the two characters telling each other they love each other for the first time, she admired what the actors brought to the subway scene: “It could have been really cartoony but you could really feel that these two people had a magnetic pull and it was really lovely to watch. . .We spent a lot of time waiting for the subway, but it was worth it. I was crying as much as The English Patient.”
”Boys”, written by Murray Miller (and directed by early feminist filmmaker Claudia Weill), illustrated the current image of pushy Jewish women on TV, as being more ambitious for their non-Jewish boyfriends than they are, in addition to more complicated, braided hair-do’s. “Shoshanna” wants “Ray” to take an entrepreneurship semimar at the Learning Annex that includes a lecture by Donald Trump: The $139 fee seems like a lot, but its totally a bargain consider they teach you how to be a millionaire. . .Yeah, obviously there’s a lot of bad stuff there, like he totally shouldn’t have hired his daughter Ivanka as a judge on “The Apprentice”. . . It says here that it gives people the tolls they need to be happy every single day of their lives! “Ray” rolls his eyes while he mops the floor of Grumpy’s: Why would I want that? She: Don’t you want to own your own coffee shop one day? He: No. But he does want to get back a present from his godmother (I thought he said grandmother, and I’ve seen recaps that think he said his aunt), a personally annotated copy of Little Women: How exactly does she think Little Women relates to your shit? Like does she think you're a Marmie or an Amy?, and vigorously nods at “Hannah”s acerbic comment that he’s more like the flu-killed off father. So she’s firm that he should get his book back from “Adam”: It’s like really your duty as a man to go. In contrast, she’s impressed by “Hannah”s e-book deal: It’s so adult and intriguing! She’s also impressed that “Marnie” is dressing up for a party she’s hosting with her boss (who she is now sleeping with): OMyG You're like Bella Swan from Twilight, and I'm like her weird friend who doesn't understand how fabulous her life is because her boyfriend won't spend, like, $4 on tacos. Who goes to get tacos on a date?. . There should be like a mood for dating. It’s a huge deal. He must totally like you. Can I come? “Shoshanna” is also a subject of discussion between “Ray” and “Adam” as they venture together into the real world of Staten Island. “Ray” appreciates “Adam”s laugh at a guy joke, though the conversation takes a surprising turn: If I made a joke that to Shoshanna, she would just stare at me and give me that slow blink. . . [It’s going] good. Considering that she knows I haven’t done more with my life, considering my age. But how do you tell someone so young that things don’t always turn out the way you think they will? Maybe it’s weird I’m dating someone so young. “Adam” is supportive, and they discuss sex with young vs. older women, until “Ray” points out: Shoshanna is the longest relationship I’ve ever had. “Adam”: You guys have been together like a week -how is that possible? Aren’t you like 40! “Ray”, very defensively: I’m 33, and that’s hurtful. And we’ve been together 4 weeks, 7 weeks since the first time we made love. I took her virginity. It’s a big deal. I kind of feel like her fucking father now. “Adam” later really unloads on “Ray” after he criticizes “Hannah”: You don’t know shit about love! . . .What are you doing with Shoshanna is not real! She’s just some kid you feel safe with because you know it won’t work out! You’re just babies holding hands! She clearly doesn’t like you! Combined with a verbal lashing from a trash-talking local (who misattributes him as “a kike” – does anyone even use that slur anymore, even on Staten Island?), “Ray” ends up weeping. (more commentary on the season coming) (updated 8/7/2013)

Sarah’s 1st season on House of Lies (on Showtime) About halfway through the 2nd season, in “Sincerity Is an Easy Disguise in This Business”, written by Karen Gist, the very WASPy blond, socially inept numbers guy “Doug Guggenheim” (played by Josh Lawson) tried out a client’s San Diego online dating service: Sarah and I have kind of really hit if off and she was glimpsed lying naked on his hotel room bed after noisy sex. His co-worker “Jeannie” (played by Kristen Bell) is quite surprised: That’s your match? My match sucked balls. “Doug” knowingly: Yeah, so did mine. But it wasn’t until three episodes later, in “Wonders of the World”, written by David Walpert, that he revealed she was Jewish as he plans to buy her a gag gift for their one-month anniversary – a Jesus light switch plate: She’s Jewish, but so she’d open it and be like what? In addition to the surprise that guest star Lisa Edelstein did not play a Jewish character earlier in the season, it was that much more ironic when “Doug”s very Jewish co-worker “Clyde Oberholt” (played by Ben Schwartz) annoyingly came on to “Sarah” (played by Jenny Slate) pool side at a corporate retreat, in “Family Values”, written by Wesley S. Nickerson III. (more commentary on the rest of the season coming) (updated 5/31/2013)

Dr. Zoe Hart in the 2nd Season of Hart of Dixie (the CW, streams free a week later on Hulu; out on DVD). She (played by Rachel Bilson) and the series seemed to forget she was Jewish until December, in the “Sparks Fly” episode by Jamie Gorenberg. Her hunky Southern good ole boy lover “Wade Kinsella” (played by Wilson Bethel) lists just about everyone in Bluebell she’ll probably ask before going on a real date with him, and adds: I know you want to consult the Pope or whatever. She protests: Jews don’t really have a pope. This seems mostly a set-up to emphasize why their date gets uncomfortable, which she forlornly analyzes at the end with implicit reference to her background as she complains she wants everyone to stay the same: Maybe some people can overcome differences, but Wade and I? We shouldn’t have [dated]. Why does everybody have to change? I changed my whole life to come here. Isn’t that enough?
The “Blue Christmas” episode, written by series creator Leila Gerstein, continued the identity contrast theme with more Jewish references than were in the series the whole season, let alone in a negative context. The African-American mayor tries to cheer “Zoe” up after her break up: It’s hard being alone on the holidays. . .Your mother arrives today. “Zoe”, with little irony: Why did I agree to this visit? This is going to be the worst Christmas ever! Mayor: Come on, the holidays are a time for joy and. . . She: In my family they are a time of judgment and fear. My mother once spent an entire Rosh ha Shanah dinner criticizing my eyebrows. Which will she go after first-- that I’m still in Alabama or that I’m not a practicing surgeon? Carolers sing about “five golden rings” in the background. Let alone that I don’t have a golden ring. She suggests help for the cookie contest: My mother the born judger will fill in for you. The she warns hunky “Wade” her mother is coming: Just so you know how difficult she is. The last thing I need is for her to know that you and I were. . . Her mother “Candice Hart” (again played by JoBeth Williams) keeps resisting her plans to keep busy, then confronts her about her excuses: I have come all this way to be with my baby girl and I’m not going to let her out of my sight. I want to hear all about your life in Bluebell, but let’s stop by a drug store and buy you a tweezer first. . . .Let’s go get a manicure and discuss that hair cut. . .The lies aren’t even well-executed. . .You didn’t even bother to make the lies good. “Zoe”: I didn’t want you to judge me like you always do. Mother: If you had spent any time with me, you might have noticed I haven’t judged you at all. Well, not on any important things. Significantly, “Zoe”s heart-to-heart with her mother takes place in front of a large menorah in her living room, in contrast to every other scene in the rest of the town that’s been smothered in Christmas decorations, and she starts with a joke before getting serious: You didn’t judge me, I did. I made some big mistakes and I didn’t want to see them through your eyes. . . Being a GP suits me. . .I like my life here. I’m even getting a taste for catfish. It’s my romantic life that’s been a disaster. . . I got scared so I pushed him away. Mother: I don’t really see you two having a future, but I don’t want to judge you anymore. Besides, what do I know? The only real risk I ever took was having an affair with a small town GP on a Greek cruise years ago and that got me you. You’ve made some decisions in your life that I absolutely question. Beginning with your choice to live so far away from me. But don’t let my irrational fears or worse your irrational fears stop you from being happy. So “Zoe” apologizes to hunky “Wade”, since she had gotten insights into his family during the episode: You really put yourself out there. I was so scared it wouldn’t work because we have nothing in common so I kind of sabotaged it. But the thing that I realized was that I like you Wade Kinsella. It turns out I like you, Wade, I really like you. Who knows maybe there’s a chance you and I could be happy together. But we’ll never know unless we try. “Wade”: What are you saying? She makes the usual case for an interfaith romance, complete with Jewish woman stereotypes, seem quite victoriously adorable and sexy: Would you maybe consider being my for real out in public everyone knows about actual boyfriend? It’s OK. You can think about it. I know I’m a handful, I’m neurotic, I know I’m too bossy, and sometimes I do. . . And he grabs her for a big kiss and carries her inside: It’s Christmas Eve. Crazier things have happened between a doctor and a bartender. and chases away the carolers: I’m kind of busy in here.
In “Take Me Home Country Roads”, written by Carter Covington, on the plus refers to her professional work helping the whole town through a flu epidemic in the previous “Lovesick Blues”, at the cost of her personal life, before a surprising synthesis for a Jewish woman on TV (minus any reminders she’s Jewish, of course). She walks home to “Wade” all muddy after falling down a hill: I was looking for cell service and it wasn’t zany like in the movies., i.e. like in a rom com. He teases her: Face it Doc, the whole town’s been treating you like Princess Leia at a Star Wars convention. And you love it. She: Oh, so what if I do. He: I’m just trying to spend some quality time with you and you’re so desperate for your fans’ attention. . . She: There’s nothing wrong with enjoying it when people appreciate your work. He: It’s a fine line between enjoying it and being addicted to it. She: It’s called career satisfaction and you’d understand that if you. . . . .That came out wrong., as he walks out. Yet he grudgingly gives her a ride and she apologizes again: I’ll just check [on a patient] then I’ll meet you back at your place? He stiffly: Take your time. She walks in on her patients gathered at the other doctor’s office: I can’t believe you people! I worked my butt off getting you people through the flu. I stayed up three nights in a row making house calls. I even neglected my own relationship. Why? Because I felt needed. I felt appreciated. Then you tossed me aside like last season’s sweater. Shame on you Bluebell! Shame on you! But shame on her, because it turns out they were all gathered for the other doctor’s surprise birthday party. She sits outside alone. His doctor son, in from out-of-town, comes out and tells her about the local blogger: He’s always mentioning this mythical Zoe Hart. . .All I’ve heard since you arrived is how amazing you are, how much you’ve done for this town. You can relax, you’re beloved. . . Maybe I should come back. It’s rewarding. She : We have more than enough doctors. She returns to “Wade”: I come in peace. . .You were right. I have been putting work before our relationship. So she booked a weekend away for them: Have you ever done it on a 4-poster bed?. . .I feel really bad about what I said. But she had inspired him to think about making plans for his bar. He: I came back to give you another shot. They kiss! She announces she’s turned off her phone and they kiss again. But there’s a knock on the door from the unlucky-in-love Mayor seeking commiseration. She and “Wade” hold hands behind his back. (Further commentary on the rest of the season forthcoming.) (updated 10/8/2013)

Raviva on Underemployed (on MTV, full episodes streaming free on MTV.com, though usually only for a week at a time) In Chicago, when the lapsed boyfriend “Lou” (played by Jared Kusnitz) complained: You’re hard to read sometimes., the very pregnant “Raviva” retorted English is not my second language., I wondered about her ethnicity, as her blondish mother had no accent. (I’ll keep checking who plays the mother.) I even thought she might be Russian because her mother complained about her behavior at home: She is like a set of Russian dolls right now, and every one of them is a total bitch. “Raviva” had returned from Los Angeles 9 months after their break-up sex just before college graduation and announced at the ex’s door: Who turned out to be pro-life?. . .I kept thinking I wasn’t going to have it, and then I ended up keeping it.. She tells her girl friends: I didn’t want to disapoint you guys. I said I was going to get a record deal and conquer the world. Instead, I got pregnant and worked at a club. When her friend reassures: You can still conquer the world., she’s rueful: I know. But now I have to do it with a baby strapped to me. She reports on telling her mother, who then, surprisingly, affectionately welcomed “Lou”: She cried a lot and said she raised me wrong. I had to make her feel better. But, when after giving birth to her daughter “Rosemary”, she closed the pilot episode, written by series creator Craig Wright, with Next year in Jerusalem! (which “Lou” ripostes with Next year in Chicago!), I discovered the character is played by the lovely Israeli actress Inbar Lavi, in her first lead role. I asked on her FaceBook page if “Raviva” is also Israeli: She only responded: "yeah she is : ) )) )) ) ) )", and just joked about the actress playing her mother isn’t.
In the 3rd episode “The Roommate”, written by Emily Whitesell, one of the friends is worried about their just out lesbian friend spending so much time with her new lover and asks “Raviva”: Can’t you get the Israelis to copter in on a zip line and grab her? She jokes back: I’ll put a call into my people. Though her mother is unseen in this episode, she’s evidently taken a break from yoga for some babysitting: She turned my old room in some kind of baby brain learning lab. It’s kind of cool.
While the show is a ratings-failure with episodes appearing erratically on the network, there has been zero reference to her background since the early ones. But the 9th, “The Confession” by Emily Whitesell, wallowed in one of TV’s most blatantly familiar stereotypes of a young Jewish woman -- as a bully broad. Her Asian friend “Sophia Swanson” has been writing a roman a clef on her computer. “Raviva” spills breast milk on it, so takes the computer to a repair shop, worrying the author, who explains why to their friend “Daphne”: When Raviva sees what I was writing when she broke it, she’ll kill me. . . A passage about her. . . sort of, a version of her, I called her Ravina. . .I thought it was poetic. . .It just has a character describe her as being sure of herself, and opinionated and pushy and ultimately kinda oblivious to how her way of being affects other people. “Daphne”: Wow, accurate. “Sophia”: Yeah, affectionately accurate though. “Raviva” picks up the computer and tartly comments to “Sophia” about “her imagination” to write about what’s not right in front of her: People who are just so annoying and unbearable.. . I’m just saying, I’m impressed. She’s sarcastic in describing their college days apartment-sharing experience: But I just take up so much space with my attitude. You’re such a good observer of people. . . Sure you are Soph, you just sit at your computer all day long drawing conclusions about everyone! . . .Course I read what you wrote! “Sophia”: Raviva, it wasn’t about you. “Raviva”: Really? Who was it about? Ravina? Ravina! “Sophia”: Yes. “Raviva”: Who is named Ravina? “Sophia”: Someone I made up. “Raviva”: Really, who just happens to have a baby and happens to write songs and just happens to be a royal pain in the ass. Give me a break. Is there anything about me that you like? Anything that you admire at all? “Sophia”: Yes of course! “Raviva”: Then why did you only choose to write about all the stuff about me that sucks! “Sophia”: Those parts of you don’t suck. Those parts of you are flaws, yeah, but flaws that make you interesting. “Raviva”: You are really interesting. You are really, really interesting. “Sophia” slams the door into her bedroom. “Lou” comes along after putting the baby to sleep and blames her: What did you do now? “Raviva”: Me? Nothing! She pissed me off. . . She wrote a story about me, or some crazy weird version of me named Ravina, and all she talks about is how she’s this pushy opinionated bitch. “Lou” smiles. She: What you agree with her? “Lou”: You do have opinions. “Raviva”: Everyone has opinions. You have opinions. “Lou”, referencing interactions with him, their friends and dates seen in the opening scenes: But yours are strong and you just come out with them. She: You asked me for my opinion. You just want me to lie. . .You and she just want me to lie all the time. “Lou”: Sometimes people just want to talk, not asking for your opinion, but trying to figure things out. Then she finds out that “Lou” had sex with a co-worker and kicks him out. “Lou”: Fine I’ll go! . . You’re obviously the one in charge!. . .She makes me feel good, OK. She likes me and she doesn’t judge me. “Raviva”: Maybe you ought be judged. From the minute I showed up pregnant you came up with this brilliant idea. . .to come up with this huge sacrifice that nobody asked you to do. . Going to work doesn’t make you a hero. . .Going after your dreams makes you a hero. He: I can’t live with someone who’s so perfect and right all the time. It’s driving me crazy. She: Then maybe you should go. . . We’ll have to figure out something about Rosemary. Amidst the crying baby, “Sophia”: I’m sorry that what I wrote hurt your feelings. “Raviva”: I apologize for being a bitch. “Sophia”: I don’t think you’re a bitch. I think you’re doing all you can under pressure. It’s hard. “Raviva”: I didn’t mean for being a bitch my entire life, I meant being a bitch last night. . . .Keep writing, we’re fine. Don’t get a job! That story is great, for what it’s worth. “Sophia”: I’m an idiot for pretending Ravina wasn’t you. “Raviva”: Do me a favor, call her Raviva. Ravina sounds like a European soda., and “Sophia” agrees. When “Raviva” compromises by following-up an offer of a bartending job where she had hoped to gig, the boss warns, as he happens to be playing her “not bad” demo CD, but still won’t let her perform: I’m kind of a pain in the ass. She smiles: Yeah, apparently I am also. He: Then you’re hired. At least in the series finale, the comopromises she made in her personal and professional lives were on her terms. (updated 1/25/2013)

Mrs. Wolowitz in the 6th season of Big Bang Theory (on CBS and out on DVD) (As heard and referred) Until I get around to posting my transcriptions, that I can vouch for, of all the nasty comments by and about “Mrs. Wolowitz”, fan episode transcripts are eventually posted. The top-rated comedy was the cover story by Lynette Rice, in Entertainment Weekly 9/28/2012: “Burning Question: Will we ever meet Mrs. Wolowitz in the flesh: ‘Technically, we saw her in the season 5 finale. When the satellite shot of Bernadette’s rooftop wedding to Howard was pulled wide, there was a speck in the corner. That was supposed to be Howard’s mom,’ explains [Steven] Molaro [the showrunner]. Otherwise there are no plans to have Carol Ann Susi – who voices the role of Howard’s mom—step in front of the camera’.” The writing staff is described as including “Eric Kaplan, a yarmulke-wearing Harvard grad who’s considered the smartest guy in the room.” Executive Producer Chuck Lorre is admired for managing three CBS sitcoms “without sounding as crazy as Howard Wolowitz’s mom.”
Executive producer Steve Molaro mostly reiterated these comments on “Mrs. Wolowitz” in The Vulture interview with Kimberly Potts, 6/7/2013: “Q: Will we finally get to see Howard Wolowitz's mom? A: Are you aware that there was a glimpse of her this season? More than a glimpse of her; we had a little fun having her cross back and forth in the background, almost like Bigfoot or a yeti. Does that not count as seeing her? Or do you mean seeing her on camera, speaking? We kind of got a little bit of a glimpse of her, this season in the kitchen. And she was on the roof at Howard's wedding. But there are no immediate plans to have her actually speaking on camera. It's more fun to keep the mystery alive.”
Posting about I Went to Work on Sukkot on her blog on 10/17/2012, Mayim Bialik gave a Jewish perspective to being on this series: “One day, I hope to be in a position to set my taping schedule around the 8,000 Jewish holidays that I want to observe according to halacha, but for now, I remain a Jew in exile, a soul yearning for its way home, and a happily employed actress on The Big Bang Theory.” (And on 3/4/2013 wrestling with Orthodox dressing strictures.) Maybe next she’ll comment about the portrayal of the Jewish mother. But she did, on 3/8/2013, comment about her casting: “I understand the appeal of ‘beautiful,’ but in terms of what I want to be like and aim for, I like to stick with the complicated and unusual, rather than the mainstream, I guess. (When you’re labeled a “character actress” from the age of 11 because of your “ethnic” nose and chin, it’s a good thing to embrace it!)” (Further commentary on the rest of the season forthcoming.)

Ziva David on NCIS in her 8th season (The 10th season on CBS, streaming full episodes):
In the season premiere “Extreme Prejudice”, written by Gary Glasberg, “Ziva” and “Tony” are stuck in an elevator for hours after a bombing of their headquarters – and her father calls: My father says it’s all over the news in Israel. Tony nags her to ask “the Great Eli David” to help find the terrorist, and she assures him he has already offered. (Translation of Cote de Pablo’s Hebrew conversation with “Ziva”s father – with the show’s popularity, this fan-produced support material is easier to find on the web these days.) She responds in English to his continuing chatter: No Abba, Tony’s never going to change. “Tony” is both sarcastic and admiring: That’s sweet your dad called.
In “Recovery”, written by Scott Williams, there’s, surprisingly, two references to “Ziva”s unique identity within the squad. First, as ex-Mossad. “Dr. Wolf”, a crisis counselor, identifies her as The spirited warrior would be Agent David, from the bullet points he was given for their mandatory psych evaluations. She pronounces on her own evaluation: I’m perfect! Then, as Jewish. A suspect rants sex discrimination for not being hired by the murder victim, and calls “Ziva” a “Femi-Nazi” for supporting her decision, making “Tony” unusually uncomfortable: You may not have noticed, but that’s not a swastika hanging around my partner’s neck.
After weeks of no references to “Ziva”s background, could the “Shell Shock Part 1” episode, written by Nicole Mirante-Matthews, have a resonance to the People of the Book? “Tony” is opening up to her about his late mother and the last movie she took him to The Little Prince. “Ziva” says a line, surprising film fanatic “Tony”: Ziva David, did you just quote a movie? She, very gently: No, I quoted a book, that was made into a movie. In the follow-up episode “Shell Shock – Part 2”, written by Gina Lucita Monreal, “Ziva” is on the phone insisting that she has to have tickets for the opera on Saturday night. “Tony” overhears and teases if he’s someone special she's going to the opera with, because it’s one of the big 3 dates: #1 - Beach. #2 - Picnic with impromptu dancing in the rain. #3. Opera. She: He’s no one. Tony: You serious about this guy? Later on a stakeout, he keeps teasing her, until she gets exasperated: You are only being nice to me until I tell you what you want to know. . .You wonder why I cannot talk to you. Why do you care? I thought we were past caring about such things. He: I thought we were telling each other about things, you know, the things that matter. She: There is no one, only Tali. He: Your sister. She: I think about her every day, but this week is the most difficult. He, evidently oblivious that would be marked by a yahrzheit: Is this when you lost her? She: Her birthday actually. Tali used to sing Puccini. Even my father’s eyes would get filled with tears. Her dream was to be on stage. So every year on her birthday, I go to the opera in honor of her. This year, this year. . . He: It was sold out. She: I know it’s silly, but I feel like I’m letting her down. The love of a sibling is. . .I’m lucky to have known it. (She didn’t feel that about her brother.) At the end, Tony puts on an opera CD for her: Maybe you’re at the opera and it’s like Tali’s there with you. She thanks him, and sits and listens to Dame Kiri Te Kanawa sing "O mio babbino caro" from Puccini's Gianni Schicchi while the rest go off to Thanksgiving Day dinner.
“Gone” episode, written by Reed Steiner and Scott Williams, included inaccurate references to “Ziva”s Israeli heritage amidst a ludicrous plot of a white suburban adolescent girl sex trafficking to order, that she compares to her life: At her age, I was about to go into the military. “Ziva” first explained a happy telephone conversation: A very good friend called from Israel. He forgot the time difference. . .Yes, Tony. I have male friends. . .’Shmeel’ has layover on the way to a conference in Seattle. She claims it’s a common name in Israel, but Tony mocks it. She protests: He’s a very wise and influential man, and I happen to share things with him that I wouldn’t dream of sharing with other people. . Do not try to compete with my Shmeel. He jokes: There is no getting in the way of Ziva and her Shmeel. “Tony” asks an outside consultant: Ever know anybody name Shmeel? What kind of name is it? The British agent, played by Alex Kingston, passed on incorrect information, oblivious to the story of Hagar’s son as the progenitor of the Arab people who no Israeli Jew would be named for: It’s a respected Hebrew name, actually derived from the Biblical Ishmael, meaning his name is God. He’s impressed: She did say he was influential. “Ziva” comes in: Who is influential? Yes he is, and I love him dearly for it. She dresses up to go out with ‘Shmeel’ (played by the elderly Jack Axelrod): He’s just a man. Shmeel Pincus, poet, philosopher, Middle Eastern historian., who jokes that she’s kvelling about him: I’ve known my Ziva since she was 3 yrs old. Trust me, we’ll be talking ‘til dawn. “Tony” drily: Let’s party! In “You Better Watch Out” episode, written by George Schenck and Frank Cardea, she continues to assimilate but still has vestiges of her Jewish identity: Even though I do not celebrate Christmas, I love the holiday season.
A multi-episode arc dealt again with “Ziva”s feelings towards her father, which is heavily symbolic about her identity as an Israeli and Jew. “Shabbat Shalom”, written by Christopher J. Waild, first had the team joking as they go through items from old cases. They find her undercover disguises –a green evening gown, sexy lingerie, and a “Bun in the Oven” T-shirt, for when she infiltrated a pregnancy group with a belly prosthesis. While “Tony” comments how happy she looked in a photo faking pregnancy, she’s practical about keeping the shirt for exercise: I make time outside of work. What I learned from my time in the Mossad – never sweat where you eat. Her father surprises her after her work-out: You are the director of the Mossad, Abba, nothing is impossible. He: My daughter has made no effort to visit me in the last 2 years. . . .I didn’t want to be refused. . . .My intentions are honorable. No one will know I am here. After she corrects his mis-use of an American idiom (Not my first radio to rodeo) to show how Americanized she’s become, he says something in Hebrew (not even identified on fan sites) and she gives him a hug. But she tattles to, her in effect American father, “Gibbs” why he says he’s in town: To spend time with me, or so he says. I know it sounds silly when I say it out loud. “Gibbs” being paternal: Not silly. . .Spend time with your father. . .And keep me updated. She: Of course. Until we find out what he's up to. Catching up with Dad again, he’s surprised she’s seen “Schmiel”, who is not a fan of his. Seeing the photo when she was posing as a pregnant woman: Now this is what retirement should look like! He talks about the world changing, though my sins might be too great for them to get past. She: I think you might be confusing retiring with repenting. Only the latter makes any difference to me. He: Then let this visit be a first step to my redemption. . . Was it a boy or a girl? She: It was not real. He: I know. But what did you tell people when they asked you? She looks more vulnerable than usual: I said it was a girl. He smiles. Later, as she leaves work she has to explain because “Tony” notes she has changed clothes: I have a dinner date. He exaggerates the Hebrew pronunciation: Shabbat dinner? She: It is Friday night. But I have no idea what or who you’re talking about. He: Tell him Meatball says hello. She chuckles: He would not mock you if he didn’t like you. She meets up with Dad, who’d explained he was in D.C. to secretly discuss peace feelers, with an Iranian intelligence agent who, in a bit of confusing geography, were cross-border orchard neighbors as children. But she challenges him about “the truth” as it relates to their murder investigation: Did you lie about when you arrived in the country? He: Ziva, the truth has many faces. . .I wanted to put an end to your perpetual suspicion. . .I want you to look at me like you did when you were a child. With pride. I saw that earlier today. . .I came to show you the good. I needed to protect that. She: An innocent man is dead. And you disposed of his body. He: Yes, I did. But why is that the only part of this that you can see? Why can’t you see the good? She cries: Because you were right. Your sins are too great. Dad: So be it. But will you please sit across from me at the dinner table one last time? Sitting down to dinner at the African-American NCIS director’s house, Dad compliments the wife: You have gone out of your way welcoming me. The candles and the meal, you have gone all out. Truly a Shabbat feast. Wife, sardonically: The magic of internet research. Dad: Even the challah. Wife: Store-bought, last minute. He stops the awkward-feeling director -- It's hard to keep it all straight.-- from drinking the wine by asking for the blessing first: Ziva used to say the same thing when she was young. But the purpose of these traditions is to always remind us of what God has given. Life, freedom, and family. That’s too much for “Ziva” to take. She stalks out, followed outside by her father and hosts, and calls “Gibbs” to tell him that her (Israeli) father is the murderer. Then the house is strafed by gunshots! Gun drawn and shooting, she chases down the assassin, who is surprised she’s followed him: I did not expect you to come after me. I thought you’d care for your father first. He dies by suicide, and she kicks his body, restrained by “Gibbs”. She goes back to the murder scene, screams Abba, weeps, and holds him in her arms while mumbling Hebrew.
The impact of his death, and the presentation of Israelis, if not Jews in general, as tribal, continued in the next, high-rated, episode “Shiva”, teleplay by Scott Williams, story by Christopher J. Waild and Gary Glasberg, opening with “Ziva”s childhood memory of lighting the Shabbat candles and saying the prayer, and young “Hollywood Kid” Gabi Coccio did the blessing quite nicely. That morphs into her now with her eyes covered, praying in a synagogue, as movies and TV usually misrepresent Jews using synagogues like Christians praying alone in churches, while she would have, instead, sought out a morning or evening minyan, discomfited at having to sit and whisper kaddish because his death has to be kept secret. But, instead, she speaks out to God: Why? Why should I not be angry? With all that has been taken? Why should I have faith in you? Show me a sign! Shown me a sign that I should not lose hope? She hears someone behind her and grabs her gun – but it’s “Tony”, who tracked down her GPS: What do you want? He: I want whatever you want, whatever you need. A friend to talk to, a shoulder to cry on. She: I'm done crying. He: Ziva. I am sorry. She: I appreciate that. But sympathy's the last thing I want right now. He: OK, then. Tell me. What can I do? What do you need? She: Revenge. Meeting with “Gibbs”, the Iranian insists he only approached the dad to discuss peace and is innocent of the murders. Eli had to many enemies. And they brought us together. The usual stereotype is needlessly thrown in for comic relief when “McGee” video calls their sexy Mossad contact in Israel “Gavriela Adel” (played by Georgia Hatzis) to find out they’ve heard rumors where the father went. But “Tony” is more focused on the flirtation: So help me, McBlivious, if you don't pounce on that hot Israeli action, I will never forgive you. “McGee”: Gabby's a spy, Tony. Flirting's just another weapon in her arsenal. “Tony” leers: And what an arsenal, huh? That wasn't just flirting, Tim, that was ‘flirting’. But for whatever reason, she's caught the McFever and you're the only cure. Down in the morgue, the forensic pathologist compares the assassin who killed himself with a cyanide pill to Goebbels, Goering, and other Nazi murderers who committed suicide. “Ziva” discusses with the pathologist her arrangements to bury her dad in Israel ASAP. “Tony” insists she stay at his place for her safety, and even brings back the oddly-named, elderly “Shmeal” from NYC to comfort her. At night, “Ziva” is crying out as she tosses and turns, so “Tony” wakes her up to let her know she’s having bad dreams, but she’s still upset and awake: Leave me alone, Tony. I’m fine. Really. An angry Deputy Director of Mossad “Elon Bodnar” (played by Oded Fehr) shows up because he’s heard the rumor that the father is in town to visit his daughter, and he gets the run-around to not find her. But he cannot be shunted aside in the investigation, even as he tends to talk in stereotyped phrases while he’s being very rude and insulting to the NCIS staff (thus alienating fans), especially compared to the more sophisticated Mossad agent the handsome, talented actor gets to play on Covert Affairs: Eli David was my dear friend, my leader, my mentor. . .Surely, Palestinians or Iranians were involved. . . You do what you must, but we’ll do what we have to do. Eli David may have died on U.S. soil, but the blood in his veins pumped through a heart that belonged to Israel. I make no promises. Back at “Tony”s, “Ziva” is emailing on his computer, to his chagrin as warns he’s protecting her: Who are you emailing? She: Old friends. They do not know. But that’s how she’s found out the Deputy is in D.C.: Apparently, my father’s protégé is in Washington, looking for me. Does he know what happened? Tony: He does now. She: And you did not think to tell me? He, with a double entendre: I think a lot of stuff all the time. I’ve been thinking of how to keep you away from all of this, but clearly that’s not working. She, sounding like her old warrior self: Why must I be kept away? I have known Elon since we were children. He always fancied himself, a part of our family, a son to Eli, which he is not. I am blood. And I’m not allowed the same access? “Tony”: He’s Mossad. She: I was Mossad. He: And now you’re the daughter of a dead man. Why don’t you let yourself act like one? Back at the office, “Elon” is furious about some ridiculous pipe dream of peace, insults the NCIS guys some more, and Skypes her: How did you find me? He: We both learned things from your father. We are both Mossad. She: Speak for yourself. He, with a surprising lack of irony: I need to see you, to mourn the loss of a great man. I loved him like a father. Mine was always too busy to spend time, but not yours. Never Eli. “Ziva” wryly: He was always fond of you. “Elon: And of you. So proud – always boasting about his American daughter. We should meet, talk face to face. She: There are rules, I can’t. He: Your father is dead, you shouldn’t be alone. You know I can find you and I will. As the team tracks down a clue to who was behind the killings, “Ziva” translates the code word they’ve found: “virtue” in Hebrew, “tohar”, is “Elon”’s middle name. She: He’s on his way here! The team is convinced he’s coming to kill her, but he’s disappeared. Back at headquarters, the Iranian eulogizes: One can only hope that Eli David will be remembered for dying in the name of peace., and “Gibbs” adds his praise: That was brave, what you and Eli tried to do. The Iranian: Our worlds are different, Gibbs. Our goals the same., and then his car blows up while he’s talking to his wife on his phone. At the airport, “Shmeal” joins “Ziva” with her father’s body, with a little joke. “Tony” assures that they’re all looking for “Elon” the killer: Shmeal’s got your back. You can do this. She: I’m going to a funeral. I’m delivering his eulogy. “Tony”: How’s this for an opening line – He did it his way. She: My father was not an easy man to understand. He: Complicated runs in the family. She gives him and big hug and he whispers in her ear (here’s the phonetic Hebrew and translation): Aht lo leh-vahd (You are not alone). She whispers back: I know. In Israel, we see her in an amber glow, praying at the Western Wall (on the women’s side, with a head covering) and sticking a written prayer in a crack. (Not that she’s joining the egalitarian protests of Women of the Wall). Outside, somewhere, she plants a tree (well, it looks more like a bush) and determinedly pulls out what looks like a machete!
But in the next episode, “Hit and Run” by Gary Glasberg, there’s only brief recognition of what she’s been through. “McGee”: She told me her stay in Israel was therapeutic. “Tony”: In a good way or a bad way? “McGee”: You think she’s OK? Which is left unanswered. (Further commentary on the rest of the season forthcoming.) (updated 2/1/2013)

Rachel Berry and Sugar Motta in the 4th season of Glee (on Fox, out on DVD) In the season premiere, “The New Rachel” by series creator Ryan Murphy, she is now a freshman at NYADA (the New York Academy for the Dramatic Arts). Her bully of a dance teacher “Cassandra July” (played by Kate Hudson) sneeringly nicknames her “Little Miss David Schwimmer”, shortened to to “Miss Schwimmer”, presumably an odd Jewish reference, even as she wears a name necklace. When “Rachel” is finally provoked to stand up to her, the teacher compliments: You’re mouthy and you’ve got guts. That will make it more fun for me when I make your every working hour hell on earth. Back at high school, “Kurt” has graduated, but can’t help still making a snide comment about her: Even when Rachel was her most controlling, she still made sure everyone felt included. But when she is teary and homesick, he ends up joining her as her new roommate in NYC , who she welcomes with a big hug.
While continuing to be conflicted about the bossy stereotype of Jewish women, “Britney 2.0”, written by Brad Falchuk, faced the not-sexy shibboleth. The mean dance teacher rejects “Rachel”s request to learn the tango: You don’t have enough sex appeal to pull off a credible tango. You’re awkward and tentative in your body, and you move like you’re ashamed of it. “Rachel” sets out to prove her wrong and shows up at class, in a black, skirted, low-cut teddy, to the teacher’s sneer that she was dressed like a Walgreen’s underwear model. “Rachel” pulls herself up: The reason I’m dressed all Bob Fosse chic is to show you that I have what it takes to be sexy, a la Roxy in “Sweet Charity”, and proceeds to have the whole dance class back her up for Britney Spears’ “Oops! I Did It Again”, where she mostly got carried around on tables and manhandled on her arms and thighs. The teacher is not impressed: You can memorize a routine, so what. . .She was OK. . .You want the truth, fine – Maria Von Trapp, Willie Loman, Shrek – those are the roles that are appropriate for your level of sex appeal. “Rachel” explodes: You’re just jealous of me, of all of us, because we have our futures ahead of us. We’re the future and you’re just some YouTube joke. The teacher kicks her out of class, but when “Rachel” comes back later to apologize, the teacher notes that school rules require that she can only be on probation, and warns her: All it took for you to snap was a little feedback, in dance class, and you expect to make it on Broadway? The upperclassman “Brody”, who’s been flirting and dancing with her, brings flowers to her work-in-progress Brooklyn apartment and declares: I think you’re very sexy. . .Whatever we’re doing I’m thinking of kissing you. While she’s thinking of her boyfriend in the Army, “Brody” watches her dance the tango in class.
While I’m behind transcribing a kind of pitiful episode about “Rachel” changing her Jewish image in NYC, “The Break-Up”, written by Ryan Murphy, had implied, related Jewish resonances, as she pours her heart out to “Finn” back from the Army, both visiting high school: This place is kind of like our Jerusalem. All roads seem to just lead us back here. . . Don't you get it? No matter how rich, or famous, or successful I become, when it comes to you, I'm always going to be that moon-eyed girl who freaked you out at a first Glee rehearsal. You are the first boy who made me feel loved, and sexy, and visible. You are my first love. And I want more than anything for you to be my last. But I can't do this any more. At least not now. We're done.
“Glease”, by Roberto Aguirre Sacasa, continued the series’ odd treatment of “Rachel”, doling out compliments then grinding her down by a Mean Girl that lasts longer as an impression. At school in NYC, the hunky upperclassman “Brody” reacts to her news that she’ll be auditioning for a role in Tennessee Williams’ The Glass Menagerie: You’re too hot to play Laura. She lets her nasty teacher know about it, who revenges on “Rachel” by picking up “Brody”s phone and claiming they’ve been together: You blew off your play date with the hottest piece of ass in NYADA to go to your loser ex-boyfriend. Said hot ass was lonely, distraught, didn’t know what to do with himself. I was more than happy to have him help choreograph a new routine, then another, next thing you know, he’s at my place. “Rachel” listens teary-eyed and jealous: You and Brody? Why? “Cassandra July” (played by Kate Hudson) continues her venom, with Jewish insinuations: Why don’t we consider this one of those little nasty life lessons. Auditioning for an off-Broadway play, throwing yourself at an upperclassman and telling me that I need to get back in the game? I need to get back in the game? I think you were overreaching and needed a little bit of a reminder: I am the game, Schwimmer. You are what you’ve always been – a privileged, self-indulgent, dime-a-. . “Rachel” hangs up in tears, and “Finn” catches up with her in the high school hallway after his directing debut of Grease. She: I shouldn’t have come here – it’s just too weird. I came for “Kurt” and for you. I just have a couple of notes, and they’re little ones. “Finn” jokes a bit: The whole time I was directing I was basically just thinking what would Rachel do? You’re kind of my moose. She corrects his pronounciation of “muse”. “Finn”: Were you crying about me? “Rachel”: I wasn't crying about you. “Finn”: Oh. I know you and I know you have four different kinds of crying. You’ve got the fake crying when you want something, which always involves a tissue. You’ve got the sing crying which this can’t be. The disappointed crying, which involves sobbing. And the crying over a guy which I know very well, because it used to be reserved for me. . . Now we have no contact, not even in song. “Rachel”: You know, I don't really know what's going to happen between us, but I know that you used to be the guy that would make me feel like the most special girl in the whole world, and it doesn't feel that way anymore. Now it just feels sad and confusing. And the worst part is that it doesn't even feel that bad any more. “Finn”: For two years, I was the guy you came to with every little problem. Are we just gonna pretend we're not even friends any more? . . .And what happened with this Brody guy made you cry, and this doesn’t? “Rachel”: I just - I shouldn't have come here. It's just too weird. She joins “Kurt”: I just want to go home. “Kurt” about their hometown high school: I thought this was home. Her reply: Not any more.
The portrayal of “Sugar Motta” (played by Vanessa Lengies, a Canadian who reportedly comes from a half-Egyptian, half-German background) is getting very close to being a new face for an anti-Semitic stereotype, unleavened by the grudging admiration “Rachel” gets for her talent. In the “Dynamic Duets” episode, written by Ian Brennan, the chorus members are taking the roll in their new “Super Heroes Club”, introducing their alternative persona and super-power. Costumed in rhinestones and gold, she grins: Sweet and Spicy, here. My super power is money. Oy, a line could have at least been added about, say, philanthropy.
“Swan Song”, the first episode written by Stacy Traub, was perceived by fans as a triumph for “Rachel”, but I thought it was still an uneasy mix. It opened with praise for her in comparison to a current member, as if a high schooler would know about a line from the 1988 VP debate: “Tina: This is all Marley's fault. New Rachel, my butt. I knew Rachel Berry. I was friends with Rachel Berry. And you, Marley, are not Rachel Berry. Back at NYADA, “Rachel” gets one of the ten prestigious “Golden Ticket” invitation from “Carmen Tibideaux” (played by Whoopi Goldberg) to perform in the “Winter Showcase”. But dance teacher “Cassandra” (Kate Hudson) keeps calling her as Schwirmer as she gives her instructions and mocks her when she asks to stop for water: Of course, yeah, everybody stop, because that’s what t happens when you’re thirsty on Broadway . They stop the show so mommy can hand you a sippie cup. “Rachel” protests: I’m not being a diva, I’m just dehydrated. I’ve been working my butt off in this class and I have gotten better. “Cassie” is relentless: Three months in you still have no stamina and no precision. . .You won’t even be able to keep up. “Rachel” continues to talk back to her: I’ve kept up with you. I’ve been able to keep up with everything you’ve thrown at me.. “Cassie” pulls rank: I don’t throw things, I teach. Nothing I do here is random or unintentional. You don’t understand my methods. “Rachel” sounds a bit whiney: It’s not my fault that you don’t see how good I’ve become. “Cassie”: OK show me I’m not wasting my time. Anybody else can join in, but this is between me and the platypus. They proceed to have a dance-off with the opening song from Chicago, “All That Jazz”. “Cassie”: Now do you see what I’m saying Schwirmer? You’re not good enough yet. “Rachel”: Maybe you’re right, I’m not as good a dancer as you are. “Cassie”: Oh, you’re finally learning something in here! “Rachel”: But I’m just as good as a singer. Maybe even better. “Cassie”: Do you think anyone in here believes that? Because there’s a big difference between self-confidence and delusion. “Rachel”: No one else has to believe it, no but me. But thank you, you actually did teach me something. If I’m going to win this showcase, the only way I’m going to do it is with my voice. Beyond the support of hunky “Brody” (played by Dean Geyer, who in the previous episode had admitted to sleeping with “Cassie”) --Remember what I said when we first met. You're here because you're the best of the best.--“Rachel” has gained inner strength, in a speech widely cited by fans online: I know I may not be a typical beauty, and no one's ever gonna pay me to walk the runway on Fashion Week, or I'm not gonna cure cancer, or write the great American novel, but if you give me a stage to sing on, I know in my gut, that no one can beat me. . .I know who I am and I know what I’m gonna do. I’m just going to go out there and sing my heart out like I’m never going to sing again. She impulsively kisses him: I’m just going to start doing things like I’m never going to get another chance. Wearing a sexy white gown on stage: Hi, I’m Rachel Berry and I’m just going to sing for you., she channels her idol Barbra Streisand with “Being Good Isn’t Good Enough” (an old track from the show Hallelujah Baby, newly heard on Release Me). Great, a standing ovation, a “Superb” from “Tibideaux” and she is pronounced one of the first freshman winners in many years. But then she announces her encore number as My favorite holiday song. Would it be about Hanukkah or about lights at solstice? Nondenominational about the winter season? No -- she picks an ultra-religious hymn “O Holy Night”, with its explicit references to the Savior. OK, so it’s from the Season 2′s Christmas album, but what a blown opportunity to put her victory over slurs in the context of her identity. Yet, in the next episode, “Glee Actually”, written by Matthew Hodgson, half-brothers by a Jewish father “Jake” and “Noah ‘Puck’ Puckerman” bond by singing "Hanukkah, Oh Hanukkah" together. They bring together “Jake”s African-American mother and “Puck”s Jewish mother (played on a recurring basis by Gina Hecht) to meet for the first time. Reacting to her husband’s former mistress with the nasty insults “Puck” has frequently commented on as characteristic of his mother, he gets them to commiserate over what an ass the father was. (Further commentary on the rest of the season forthcoming.) (updated 9/30/2013)

Prisoners of War (Hatufim) -- Wives, Daughter, Sister, Intelligent Agent, and more women in 1st season (Israeli 2009 series streaming in the U.S. as of Summer 2012 on Hulu; available on Region 1 DVD). While it is the basis for Homeland, there are more women featured in addition to the spy in the American adaptation – a sister, a girlfriend, a wife, and a daughter. In Tim Molloy’s interview with the series’ originator: “Gideon Raff on Creating Homeland, His Hopes for Peace and 'No Nuclear Iran'”, posted 9/28/2012, on The Wrap discussed his Israeli series, whose 2nd season debuts about the same time as Homeland’s: “It's almost a taboo. The lives of prisoners of war after they are returned is almost never discussed, never explored. That's part of why I wanted to make this show. I realized there is a world of drama no one's tapped into. And we are so obsessed in Israeli society with bringing back the boys. We go out to the streets for it. We campaign for it. We demand our leaders pay a high price for it. We pay a high price for it. But once they're back, that's the happy ending we need, and we don't want to hear about their post-traumatic stress disorder. We don't want to hear about what they have to face. For some of them, it's just the beginning of the journey and harder than captivity itself. I wanted to make a show about coming back and having to deal with all that… But the heart of the Israeli show is the re-integration into Israeli society. Meeting the family. Meeting the wife that has been waiting for so long. And have you dated anybody?” As to the role of the female spy, he noted: “In the Israeli version, the investigation is from the Israeli [counterpart of] the CIA. We kind of exposed how the system did the surveillance and followed these prisoners of war after they came back and spied on them and that became a very controversial topic in Israel. People just didn't know about it.” (My commentary on the Jewish women forthcoming.) (updated 7/9/2014)

2011/2012 Season

In series creator Richard Price’s failed NYC 22 cop show, that CBS burned off in summer Saturday night broadcasts, Jewish reporter turned cop Ray 'Lazarus' Harper (played by Adam Goldberg) finally mentioned a female in his life in a Jewish context in “Jumpers”, written by Ken Sanzel. Upset by vandalism of a synagogue, he rants against hate crimes even as he admits that he hasn’t been to temple since my daughter’s bat mitzvah. The brick thrower turns out to be the rabbi’s son who includes his mother in his angry justification for his behavior: We did -- me and mom and Richie – we let go and surrendered to God and God killed him., referring to his brother who died of leukemia. In a subsequent episodes, his daughter “Ruby” was played by Lizzy DeClement, looking straight out of Gossip Girl, because her step-father the endocrinologicst is paying tuition at private school. (updated 8/9/2012)

In the first episode of The L.A. Complex (a Canadian series shown on the CW), “Down in L.A.” written by Martin Gero, Mary Lynn Rajskub cameo’s as a version of herself at an improv comedy club. She excoriates a new guy for confusing her with Sarah Silverman because she’s Jewish. The joke is on him as he stutters surprise that she is Jewish – which she’s not. Another Canadian series had an odd reference, in Endgame (streaming in the U.S. on Hulu) episode “Turkish Hold Em”, by series creator Avrum Jacobson, Russian chess master “Arkady Balagan”(played by Shawn Doyle) is interviewing a robbed, stereotyped movie producer who throws around some Yiddish and talks of old Hollywood. He mispronounces “Balagan”, but praises him: You must be Jewish. He responds: I’m one-quarter, my mother’s mother. The rich guy approves: Ah, the right quarter. ((updated 6/14/2012))

In MTV’s hipster Brooklyn-set I Just Want My Pants Back, the lead guy “Jason Strider” (played by Peter Vack) announced in the first episode he’s Jewish, but in the second, “Baby Monkeys”, written by series creator David J. Rosen, he put dating Jewish women in a negative context, if he doesn’t find the “Jane” who took his pants after a one-night stand: At least then I can start Plan B: becoming religious and finding a nice girl via an arranged marriage. But his blonde best friend “Tina” is even more so: I don’t know. Religious girls aren’t really into personal grooming. I had gym with Tikla Rubinstein – huge bush. While her comment is taken directly from his book, it was surrounded by a more positive context, where “Jason” is Jewish, and he did sleep with the sexually aggressive Orthodox girl her comment referenced, who he met at a synagogue class in marriage officiating because he is presiding over the wedding of his law student friend “Stacey”, who is also not Jewish on MTV. (updated 5/23/2012)

In “Time Machines”, the first episode of Michael Feinstein’s American Songbook, which I hadn’t realized is in its 2nd season on PBS’s Great Performances, his mother is interviewed, and her son puts her in a Jewish context. While she kvells he was always “special” (just because he was interested in older popular culture or because he was gay?) so that she treated him differently than his older brothers; he brags that he convinced her to let him avoid being bar mitzvah. (I seem to be more and more commenting on real Jewish women seen on TV.) (2/7/2012)

In Homeland about terrorists at home and abroad in relation to fighting in the Middle East, there’s no reference to Israel, or the Mossad, though this is based on the Israeli TV series Prisoners of War (Hatufim), and only one odd, passing mention of Jews at all. In the 4th episode, Semper I”, written by Howard Gordon and Alex Gansa, when the returned POW’s best friend explains his divorce and what happened to his ex-wife Victoria: She married a Jewish orthodontist in Fort Lauderdale, and she and the kids converted last year. (1/22/2012)

While almost all the episodes of The Sarah Silverman Program are still on my DVR because of my procrastination to transcribe and comment on them, I try to catch shows she guest stars on because she usually plays a Jewish character. But, oddly, in the “Thanksiving” episode of The League, a raunchy FX sitcom I haven’t yet been monitoring, she inexplicably was the sexually know-it-all sibling of one of the gentile guys – maybe so she could end up being happily boinked in the rear by the one Jewish father “Ruxin” (played by Jeff Goldblum). (12/9/2011)

On Lost Girl, on the episode “Dead Lucky”, written by Emily Andras (broadcast in Canada in 2010, but shown on SyFy in the U.S. in February 2012), the supernatural bookie, a “Dark Fae”, named “Mayer” (played with thick Yiddishisms by Aron Trager) has a nephew named “Seymour”, so presumably his teenage niece “Cassie” the Oracle (played by Vanessa Matsui), is also Jewish, but there’s more reference to the mythological Cassandra than to her being Jewish. (2/18/2012)

In the 4th season finale of In Plain Sight (on USA), there was finally definitive confirmation that the marshall’s sister’s rich fiancé “Peter Alpert” (played by Joshua Malina), who had met her at AA, was Jewish, as he was wearing a yarmulke and waiting by the rabbi under the chuppah for her at their planned wedding. His mother “Dora” (played by Randee Heller) was only portrayed in 3 episodes as snooty, nothing particularly Jewish, but that was enough to make her potential daughter-in-law a nervous wreck. (8/11/2011)

In HBO’s How To Make It In America (out on DVD), Jewish men are specifically identified as such in the financing and manufacturing end of today’s garment district, so a viewer can only infer that the influential, aggressive and verbally pointed fashion talent agent representative “Nancy Frankenburg” (played by the ever sexy Gina Gershon) is Jewish. Though she sends her kids to a St. Maximilian's middle school, she’s married to an Israeli and beds her client “Ben Epstein” (Bryan Greenberg). (3/22/2012)

In the “An Emo and A Mensch” episode of Mulher de Fases, the 2010-2011 Brazilian comedy series (executive produced by Nora Goulart, but I couldn’t figure out the specific writer) carried this year on HBO Latino (and On Demand), the protean central character “Graça” (played by Elisa Volpatto), a real estate agent, becomes fascinated by her Orthodox Jewish client “Moises” (played by Sergio Wilkin), as she does by every man she meets, and tries on conversion, in her fashion. She dresses modestly, avoids pork, buys books, reads up on Judaism to try an follow mitzvot, throws some Yiddish words into conversations, and tries out adopting a Hebrew name. But when she pursues him to synagogue on Rosh ha Shanah, he accuses her of trying to seduce him, and he walks away from her, despite that most online synopses say they dated. (6/8/2012)

In the 3rd episode of Pan Am (on ABC, available on DVD), “Ich Bin Ein Berliner” by Yahlin Chang, the French stewardess “Colette Valois” (played by French-Canadian Karine Vanasse) revealed bad childhood memories of the German occupation of Paris. Given how little American audiences know about this history, many viewers assumed she was Jewish. In Berlin during President Kennedy’s visit on June 26, 1963, she bristles at an East German courier’s memories of delivering bread from her parents’ bakery to the then Luftwaffe headquarters, has frightened flashbacks at hearing German, emotionally sings the first stanza of "Deutschland über alles" as she remembers being forced to learn it (a bit awkward at a cocktail reception for its Third Reich resonance), and tells her co-workers how her parents left her with neighbors, promising to return for her, and they never did. It could be just as probable that her parents were Socialists, Communists, union organizers, or other anti-Nazi activists, as she explains: I came to Germany to forgive, but I still hate them, and I don’t want to stop. In the “1964” episode, the season, possibly series finale by Nick Thiel, “Colette” is being investigated by the aides of the Middle Eastern Prince “Omar” who is courting her (yeah, it became that kind of soap), and she explains that her parents were in the French Resistance, so that’s why they were killed by the Nazis and she was raised in an orphange. But the prince’s people do more investigating to discover that her last name doesn’t match her parents’: The nuns changed your name to protect you and themselves. They changed your name from Halevi. (Or maybe he said Levy?) She: My parents were Jewish? My parents were not in the Resistance? How did they die? Prince: That’s not important. She repeats her question. He: Dachau. I stayed up all night wondering how I would tell you. She: My whole life I’ve only known lies. Even my own name. He: It doesn’t change who you are now. She: No, but it changes us now. He shows her a photograph: It was taken by the friends who brought you to the orphanage. It’s of her and her parents -- with a baby boy. The Prince explains they found out he was adopted a few days later. (Highly unlikely as circumcised boys were riskier to pass off for a gentile adoption.): As far as we know he survived. While she’s shocked at all the news, which derails the courtship, she smiles that she has a brother. Later at the New Year’s Eve party, another stewardess reacts: You lost a prince, but gained a brother. She tells the handsome, cheating pilot she had earlier broken up with: Tomorrow I start looking for him. But he wants her back and begs to help her look. (updated 1/29/2013)

I watch secret agent shows for the appearance of the inevitably stereotyped, usually sexy Mossad agent. In Covert Affairs (on USA), “Eyal Lavine” (played by Oded Fehr) returned in the second season to reference Jewish women in absentia in different TV stereotypes, on the kibbutz and in the Holocaust, in “A Girl Like You”, by Normal Morrill. He explained the 2002 incident that drove him to quit medical school and drives him to revenge on a specific terrorist: He assassinated an IDF guard and six kibbutzniks. He was hoping to poison the peace talks. One of the civilians was my sister. I love my country and I would do anything for it, but it was the reason I became a Mossad agent. 9 years, 2 months, 8 days ago. Her name was Sarah, after our grandmother who died in Treblinka. The perky blonde American CIA star argues: Don’t do it! It’s not what your sister would want. But he chuckles in response: You didn’t know my sister. It’s exactly what she’d want. (11/25/2011)

In the New Girl (on Fox) “Kryptonite” episode, by series creator Elizabeth Meriwether, “Schmidt” the womanizer (played by Max Greenfield) helpfully delves into his “Lost and Found” from the women he’s slept with at the apartment. When an unraveled wig is pulled out, he sighs: Ah, Rosh ha Shanah ’06. Nothing Orthodox about what we did that night. None of the many fansites I checked got the joke. (The Jewish references could be courtesy of a co-producer from Queens I’ve known since she was in primary school with my sons.) Later in the season, he commented about his bar mitzvah, which his best friend mocks as having been too expensive. In the episode “Fancyman-Part 2”, written by Berkley Johnson & Kim Rosenstock, he warns the super-model he’s sleeping with who is trying to distract him from work by putting on various outfits: If you want to seduce me, don’t dress like my Aunt Frieda at seder. It seems that every sit com with a Jewish man has such negative mentions of Jewish women in their family. (updated 4/8/2012)

Two genealogical discovery Docu-Series featured women with Jewish ancestors.
On Who Do You Think You Are (the NBC version of the Brit series),
Helen Hunt confirmed that her father’s grandmother, who he knew with the last name of “Roberts” in Pasadena, was born into the NYC “Rothenberg” family, which led to a historical discussion, with photos and political cartoons, of anti-Semitism and assimilation. All Hunt had known about this ancestor was that she was wealthy enough to live in a residential hotel; a Jewish woman genealogist shows her they are related through Bavarian Jewish immigrant brothers who made it big selling clothes amidst the California Gold Rush to become financial partners of Levi Strauss, in what became Wells Fargo Bank.
Rashida Jones, who expresses her sense of Jewish identity firmly, participated in the project to learn more about her matrilineal line through her mother, the actress Peggy Lipton. They are surprised to discover that when her grandmother Rita Rosenberg, a NYC taxi dancer, changed her name to Benson she was adopting her family’s patronymic traced back to 18th century Lithuania when Jews were required to adopt surnames, and that only her emigrant branch survived the Holocaust. (detailed commentary forthcoming) (updated 8/11/2012)
On PBS’s Finding Your Roots with Henry Louis Gates, Jr. (available on DVD), Barbara Walters learned that her Polish Jewish immigrant ancestors also changed their name (from the Anglicized “Warmwater”) when they went to San Francisco (after stopping in London, as I’ve learned my father’s family also did). But with Gates’s emphasis on tracking the Y chromosome, there’s no mention of her Jewish female relatives (she recalls her mother lighting Friday night candles as her only religious observance), even though an enterprising researcher finds her grandparents’ NJ graves with informative headstones. Worse, when her DNA reveals 8.1 % European make-up, in comparison to the rest what the geneticists identify as Middle-Eastern, Gates chuckles about “creepin’ and crawlin’ at night” in her family tree, instead of considering conversion, intermarriage, or raping pogroms, even though he specifically shows historical illustrations of Jews “fleeing violent anti-Semitism in Eastern Europe”. He continued to be insensitive, creeping into offensive, when dealing with Kyra Sedgwick. Because her father’s family is so eminent in American history from colonial days on, he expected her to be oblivious to her mother Patricia Rosenwald, who he describes as being from “prosperous Jewish immigrants . . . from another kind of royalty, a princess, a Jewish American Princess from New York City”. While it’s only mentioned in passing that her parents divorced when she was young so that she was apparently raised by her mother, Kyra repeatedly emphasizes to him: “I do describe myself as Jewish. I embrace my Jewish side. . .I want to be half-Jewish. I’m proud of my Jewish heritage.” So why is Gates so surprised when her genetic test confirms that she is 50% Ashkenazi? He did a bit of a mea culpa with Maggie Gyllenhaal - commentary forthcoming.
The episode on celebrities with Latino roots included the discovery that conservative Catholic commentator Linda Chavez’s ancestor who first came to the New World from Spain returned with his wife in 1567, because she had been charged by the Inquisition as a converso, an expediently converted Jew. Chavez’s genetic test of 20+ percent “Middle Eastern” markers indicated a continuing pattern of marriage among the “crypto-Jews” of New Mexico in her ancestry. (updated 7/17/2012)

Castle is yet another crime series (filmed in L.A.) set in a NYC with few Jews. So maybe writer David Grae intended the Jewish woman in “Til Death Do Us Part” to be tongue in cheek. A witness reports seeing a woman flee the scene of the crime wearing a Star of David: I’m pretty sure that’s a symbol of El Al. The cops track down El Al flight attendant “Collette Roth” (played by Parisa Fakhri) and accuse her of being a member of Mossad because the victim was poisoned. With a heavy accent and rolled rrrr’s that series fans didn’t realize was typical of Hebrew-speakers, she insists she’s not a spy: We were soul mates., even as she describes staking out his apartment to find clues as to his claimed enemies: I was looking out for him. . . There were r-r-r-ruffians in ski masks! I fought with all my strength but it was in vain. She’s sure they killed him, but it turns out his pick-up artists friends staged it to get rid of “the crazy stalker chick”. (1/22/2012)

In Prime Suspect, “A Gorgeous Mosaic” by Kevin J. Hynes, showed the Typical Jewish Woman in Crime Shows Filmed in NYC: the wife of a Hasid Who Works in the Diamond District. Though only her scarf somewhat identified her as dressed as a modest Orthodox woman, “Mrs. Simon Kesh” (played by Sara Mornell) weeps for her dead husband and his envy of the rich rappers who wore the bling he made for them (presumably inspired by Jacob Arabo). But her own prejudices are detailed by an African-American suspect: That woman asked me what my African name was. It’s like medieval times up in that house. (12/19/2011)

In The Secret Life of the American Teenager (on ABC Family), Jewish women characters were introduced in the mid-4th season episode “Smokin' Like A Virgin”, by series creator Brenda Hampton. “Dylan Green” (played by Ana Lucasey) follows up a party at the lake by calling “Ben” a lot and describes herself on the phone as: My mom’s Jewish. My Dad’s Catholic. Her mother “Natalie” (played by Mindy Cohn) asks her about him and is excited when she declares that he may be her first real boyfriend. But even as she describes her parents as nosey and overprotective, Mom listens in on her only daughter’s conversations with her girlfriends about his past, complicated relationships. They lo jack her, track her down to “Ben”s house, and discover they’ve been sitting around smoking pot. (3/29/2012)

In the “Leap of Faith” episode of Blue Bloods (on CBS), written by David Black, it seemed oddly gratuitous that the mentally unstable daughter “Sandy Huffman” (played by Aubrey Dollar), who is insisting to the Catholic cops that God told her that her step-father killed her wealthy, MS-stricken mother “Caroline” in their Park Avenue apartment, declares I’m Jewish, but it’s the same God. The stepfather “Charles Bynes” (Timothy Busfield) points out she has been hospitalized for mental problems in the past, including attacking an economics professor because she said God told her to, but she’d benefit financially: She may be crazy, Detective, but she’s not stupid. She credits God’s help for the crucial information on the murder and the key clue: I’m sure he has a plan for me. While the detectives joke about the Bible, her references just don’t sound Jewish, par for the course in one of those shows set in a NYC with few Jews. (3/1/2012)

MI-5 (Spooks) (First shown in the U.K. as Episode 9.5 on 10/18/2010, but shown in February 2012 on U.S. PBS stations) “Anna Cohen” (played by Maya Lubinsky) is an ex-Army ex-Palestinian kidnap victim who has serious, revengeful issues with her diplomat father “Levi Cohen” (played by Paul Freeman). (Commentary forthcoming) (2/18/2012)

In The Good Wife “Affairs of State” episode by Corinne Brinkerhoff, the politically ambitious ex-wife of "Eli Gold" (Alan Cumming) is finally seen --“Vanessa” (played by Parker Posey). Despite implications in earlier seasons, not only is there zero reference to anything possibly Jewish about her, even when they argue about their marriage, she is revealed to have committed adultery with a Bin Laden, while doing PR in Dubai for an oil company. She returned in “Live From Damascus”, teleplay by creators Robert King and Michelle King and Leonard Dick, story by Ted Humphrey, to spar about her State Senate campaign. (She: Do me a favor – either stop caring or officially get on board.) But despite her admiration for his aggressive advice how to handle her affair PR-wise, as a challenge to anti-Muslim prejudice, she gives him a peck on a cheek: I miss arguing with you. Win or lose this will be nice., there is still zero reference if she, too, is Jewish. There is certainly more chemistry between them than with his competitor who he slept with, played by Amy Sedaris. (updated 3/2/2012)

I could barely stand watching the first two episodes of Happily Divorced (on TV Land) to see if Fran Drescher’s based-on-her-own-life character “Fran Lovett” would be explicitly identified as Jewish. Evidently she, as well as her mother “Dori” (played by Rita Moreno), and probably her friend played by Renee Taylor, were later in the season, but in order to review I’ll have to make myself watch more episodes sometime when I have absolutely nothing else to do.
Moreno commented in an interview: “We were rehearsing one of the kitchen scenes between Fran and her mother and father, and Fran stopped in the middle of the scene, and she said ‘Have you ever played a Jewish woman before?’ And when I said ‘no,’ she couldn’t believe it. But I’ve always loved doing accents and I’m pretty good at them too. [Fran] said, ‘It’s unbelievable. You are the quintessential New York Jewish woman.’” (10/1/2011)

I only bothered to watch the first of TNT’s Mystery Movies because it was Scott Turow’s Innocent, as adapted by director Mike Robe, and I’ve been meaning to read more of his books. So I was surprised that the victim “Barbara Sabich” (played by Marcia Gay Hayden) was Jewish seemingly for the only reason to portray her as over-protective (when she wasn’t being crazily manic-depressive). Her husband characterizes her as The Jewish Pillsbury when she fussily insists her adult son wear fluorescent gloves while biking. Her murder (or suicide) is caused by her meds ingested with pickled herring and salami, albeit Italian salami. (12/2/2011)

I haven’t gotten around yet to commenting on the 2nd season of Bored to Death (on HBO, out on DVD), when the Jewish girlfriend quickly left, but the opening episode of the 3rd season (out on DVD), “The Blonde in the Woods” by creator Jonathan Ames, came the closest to having the lead character’s mother “Florence Ames” (played by Allyce Beasley) be identified specifically as Jewish. (Could it be because a young woman from Queens I’ve known since she was in primary school with my sons is now a co-producer?) She expalins that he was conceived via a donor from a sperm bank: It was in Fairlawn, near the kosher nosh restaurant. You know, the place with the wonderful kugel.. She notes reassuringly All we know is that he was Jewish and very bright, which is what we requested. He was a member of Menscha. His father “Ira” (played by Richard Masur) corrects her: He was a member of Mensa. Fan sites haven’t gotten her quotes fully correct with their Jewish resonances. In “Gumball”, by Ames and Martin Gero, she defends her son to the cops who want to arrest him for killing a Jockey: He says he’s innocent. He went to Princeton – he wouldn’t lie! (He was framed.) (12/2/2011)

Modern Family (on ABC) used a Jewish woman for a punch line of a joke in the “Door to Door” episode by Bill Wrubel. When the older father takes his Latino son out for a lesson in suburban door-to-door salesmanship for a school fundraising effort, their spiel for Christmas wrapping paper gets several negative responses, including one woman who says apologetically: Actually, I’m Jewish. Even the dad winces when the kid brightly responds: Then you must appreciate a good value! (10/20/2011)

The CW mocked its own Gossip Girl’s reputation for having no Jews on its version of the Upper East Side of Manhattan by running an ad as “Gossip Goy” to promote the episode “The Fasting and The Furious”, written by Peter Elkoff. That was probably to deflect the borderline offensiveness of the episode where everyone was eating and working before the “Waldorf”s” trendy Yom Kippur break fast. In the morning, resident rich bad boy “Chuck Bass” meets a beautiful EurAsian woman with a randy dog in the park, finds out she’s psychologist “Dr. Eliza Barnes” (played by K.K. Moggie), shows up at her office to flirt, but is brushed off when she says she has to get to services. (Then what was she doing at work?) He expresses surprise she’s Jewish, and she, annoyed, explains she converted last year. He, cynically: Good move in your line of work. He pursues her from services that night and brags he gave a huge bribe to find out what temple she attended. She proceeds to give him a zinger of a detailed diagnosis on what he needs to lead a happy and a normal life. He’s shook up and calls her: I don’t need another notch on my belt - -I need help. I’m serious-- if you’ll help me. She has a busy night after break fast, because “Prince Louis” also calls for her help. At least in the next episode, her religion isn’t mentioned when her unethical actions on his behalf are revealed. (updated 11/12/2011)

Hawthorne (on TNT, out on DVD) is set in one of those TV hospitals that has no Jewish doctors (they probably think the Richmond, VA setting is an excuse), but the "Let Freedom Sing" episode by Sibyl Gardner, featured an Orthodox Jewish couple, in a story line that would have made a lot more sense if they were Conservative Jews. As the wife “Sarah Colton” (played by Rachel DiPillo with long brown curls) coos at the doctor’s photos of his kids, the yarmulke-wearing husband (played by Andrew Rothenberg) explains: You can see why she wants to be the youth director at our temple. [sic – Orthodox guy would have said synagogue.] But the doctor has bad news – the cancer has spread to her other vocal chord. She insists: Keep my voice box right where God put it. I stutter except when I sing. . .God’s given me something that that that not only takes away my embarrassment, but I can use to share Him with others. I can’t lose that. Later, she falls to her knees, and sings with her eyes closed, explaining with mordant humor to the interfering teen operating room administrative assistant: I was just praying, but it’s like talking to a wall. [sic – An Orthodox woman would be singing in Hebrew, standing, and swaying in davenning.] The insufferable teen lectures her about what she’s learned about life and God. “Sarah” earnestly justifies her attitude – which would make a lot more sense if she were a cantor in a non-Orthodox environment: I believe my life and my voice are a gift from God. I hope to be a youth director in a few years. Her husband interprets: We walk by faith. But later she cries alone: I asked him to run an errand. I don’t want him to see me like this. . . I’m hurt and really confused and angry! Why do I have to choose between my life and my voice when all I want to do is sing about my faith? (So why would she just want to be a youth director and not a cantor?) The teen suggests she postpone the surgery, as the wife is torn: I can’t just go by my feelings. . . .I have to trust God. . . I have to believe that I won’t [lose my voice]. She hums on the gurney to the O.R. and explains the Psalms: The words have been preserved, but we don’t know the melodies, so I come up with my own. The unqualified teen tells her post-surgery that the doctor tried to save her vocal chords, but the tumor had grown. The wife cries, gets up from her recovery bed to again inaccurately pray on her knees, as the soundtrack plays the Psalm she can never sing again. All of which inspires the annoying teen to get informally baptized by the O.R. doctor. (7/24/2011)

Southland- “Community” episode (description forthcoming) (2/8/2012)

Shoshanna Shapiro in the 1st season of Girls (on HBO, out on DVD) The first three episodes didn’t explicitly say that any of the characters were Jewish. So this reference by creator Lena Dunham in her post-episode commentary on the main females was a bit jarring, and may have been referring to executive producer Judd Apatow: They have “that kind of interesting mix of complete self-confidence and no self-worth that is the trademark of most 24-year-old girls and Jewish comedians.” But in an interview on NPR’s Fresh Air on 5/7/2012 she described the characters: "I wrote the first season primarily by myself, and I co-wrote a few episodes. But I am a half-Jew, half-WASP, and I wrote two Jews and two WASPs.”
In “Hannah’s Diary”, written by Dunham, the youngest of the four, NYU student “Shoshanna Shapiro” (played by Zosia Mamet), the cousin of the sexy blonde, globe-trotting British rose “Jessa Johansson” (played by Jemima Kirke), is stopped on the street by “Matt Kornstein” (played by Skylar Astin), who recognizes her from Camp Ramah (of all the Jewish camps that could have been referenced, this religious one was the oddest choice in this context, either out of ignorance or shock value): You led the most intense kitchen raid in my time time as a junior counselor. . . It was the most intense. She beams: We planned it for like weeks. They stare at each other as he concurs: It was really awesome. She murmurs: I knew. and they go from sit and talk on a stoop, to reveal more of her neuroses that led to her leaving camp early. He: I heard a rumor that you tried to kill yourself by sucking all the air out of a raft. She: No, I’m anxious, not depressed. I did that on a dare. She has a much more positive memory of him saving a girl on a kayak. He asks her to hang out that night, and they watch a movie together, and she nervously rattles off more to watch. But he’s wearing a knee brace and claims he needs to stretch his leg. She offers: U can put it on me, if that would help or whatever. He: You can touch it, if you want. She: I don’t want to touch it if we haven’t kissed. So he kisses her and then he’s quickly undressing her in her bedroom. He’s going on complimenting her body, including City girls are so much hotter than Long Island girls., when his face is quickly down between her legs: I like to eat pussy. It seems weird but I freakin’ love it. She squirms uncomfortably and hesitantly asks: Do you want to have sex instead? If you want to. He thinks that’s cool, but she goes on to confess she’s never had sex before, and he stops. He: Virgins. Not my thing. Virgins get attached and bleed. She pleads on and on that she wouldn’t be like that, repeating his terms with negatives, and begs. He: Not going to happen. In Dunham’s commentary: “When you’re in your 20’s, sex is the battleground where a lot of stuff gets played out. . .She’s getting so close but sex didn’t happen. Zosia was such a champ. I’ve shot a lot of awkward sex scenes, but that was especially painful because the character didn’t know how it worked.” Though she isn’t credited as directing this episode.
In “Welcome to Bushwick aka The Crackcident”, written by Dunham and Jenni Konner, “Shoshanna”, who “Jenna” introduces as “my maternal cousin”, has an experience inspired by a friend of Dunham’s of accidentally ingesting crack at a “warehouse party”. She motormouths about being very high and details having smoked “a glass cigarette”. When “Jenna” realizes what she’s smoked, “Shoshanna”s first reaction is: Oh, no, don’t tell my mom! Don’t tell me! “Jenna” volunteers to be her crack spirit guide to get her through it, but quickly abandons her to her best friend’s ex’s bandmate “Ray” (played by indie darling Alex Karpovsky), who has a nasty, stereotyped response: I’m not a fucking JAP day care! But when she runs off, he follows her down a deserted street, even when she bellows for him to stop chasing her and she attacks him with a move to the balls she learned to do in a kickboxing self-defense class (or some such) that she had only practiced on a mattress. She contritely offers a groin massage in a non-sexual way she learned in a sports therapy class. He ends up complimenting her technique. There’s another odd reference, when “Hannah” (played by Dunham) tries to empathize with an unusually-named woman that Sometimes people pronounce my name ‘Chana’ like it’s Israeli, which is completely disorienting. I’m beginning to think she’s so obviously not a New Yorker that she doesn’t get that her Jewish associations are a bit tone deaf.
HBO Interview: Q: “Ray tells ‘Jessa’ in this episode that he isn't running ‘a J.A.P. day care’. Do you worry about her coming across as a type? Zosia Mamet: I tried really hard to not make her too much of a caricature. I know Lena Dunham and Jenni Konner are always on the lookout for that. She's most definitely a character; she's not a subtle role to play. I'm sure some people think of her like that, but I hope that the majority of people don't. She might seem initially ridiculous, but she has a complicated inner life.”
In the season’s penultimate episode “Leave Me Alone”, written by Dunham and Bruce Eric Kaplan, the other “Girls” are jealous and sarcastic about the success of their college classmate publishing the titular, angsty memoir. But “Shoshanna” enviously thinks the vaguely Jewish-sounding-named author “Tally Schifrin” (Jenny Slate, who has played Jewish characters before) is “so beautiful”, whose experiences get her thinking. She monologued this really fast so I tried to catch the most significant sentences: I don’t know how much time I have left, so, like, I have to start living. I did something kind of crazy. I made an internet dating profile. My nutrition teacher who is like so cool met her boyfriend on match.com. . .I joined [?] one with the most expensive subscription. . . I got this message from a great sounding guy named ‘Bryce’ which is like a good name. He works in product development, which is good for me because I love products. And he’s Jewish. (Her cousin “Jenna” is particularly surprised by that, and repeats “He’s Jewish.”) He likes movies and food. . . .We’re starting in a public place because I know you’re supposed to do that in case they want to rape you. . .So we’re meeting at the café at the Old Navy flagship store. . .I’m going on a JDate!
In the season finale “She Did” (which applies to each Girl), by Dunham, “Shosh” starts the day in a bad mood: I hate today so much that I might not even go to class. “Marnie” protests: But it is so gorgeous a day. “Shosh”: Yeah, I know. It gives me such an uneasy feeling, like a spring itch. I saw 3 people touching tongues yesterday outside my final. “Marnie”: Three couples? “Shosh”: No, three people. “Jemma” invites the Girls to a mystery party (“Shosh” says she threatened to gut me like a fish if I didn’t come), and they are all shocked to discover it’s for her wedding. “Shosh” focuses only on her own inadvertent violation of social rules: I wore white. Because nobody told me. When “Jemma” throws a garter, instead of a bouquet, directly at her, she walks away with great annoyance, and tells “Ray” she’s too upset to dance with him: Everyone’s a dumb whore! “Ray” persists: You’re the strangest person! You’re so raw and open. You vibrate on a very strange frequency. She’s startled: Are you punking me? He: It’s very confusing to me, too. I want to go with you tonight. She: Fine. Just stay out of my emotional life. They sneak out of the party, and they’re next seen in bed, she looking very nervous. She: It doesn’t hurt. He: Because I haven’t done anything yet. He sits up and she panics, repeating such phrases as: You hate virgins! You totally don’t like me! You totally lied! You totally lied about liking me! He: You’ve never done it before. Thus, I’m teaching you how it’s done. It’s a lot of power that I don’t know I deserve. She: My aunt said it’s like scratching a sunburn. He: But I probably do. In Dunham’s post-episode discussion, she explains that “Shosh” is offended at not being involved in planning the wedding, when she’s read up what to do in brides’ magazines. While she describes “Ray” as being attracted to “Shosh”s “sweetness”, she says the cast discussed how “Shosh” would handle losing her virginity, including keeping her bra on, putting on a cheesey girly song (being identified), and lying very still.
To Vulture’s Katie Van Syckle, 6/21/2012, Girls’ Alex Karpovsky Calls Shoshanna an ‘Anti-Hipster’-- “As for what he thinks ‘Ray’ sees in ‘Shosh’: ‘A lot of things. Most strikingly her sincerity, her courage to be who she is, her belief in her own convictions even if they are not totally formed, her innocence. She hasn’t been warped by New York and its hipster bullshit. She is either an anti-hipster or a pre-hipster, one of the two. Either way, she is not a hipster, and that is a good thing for ‘Ray’.’ Not to mention, Brooklyn.”
As the show gained in popularity, there was online grumps that “Shoshanna” wasn’t in each episode, but she did qualify to be included for New York Magazine Vulture’s Kyle Hilton to create a series of Girls “Paper Dolls” to print out, with items representing her memorable appearances: “Listen Ladies book, abortion snacks, stuffed animals, ‘Just Smoked Crack’ face, ice-cream, missing skirt, and crack-fueled fighting stance!” (updated 12/7/2012)

Magic City – Evans family, etc. in the 1st season (on Starz, out on DVD) – The premiere episode, “The Year of the Fin”, by series creator Mitch Glazer, is set just at the dawning of January 1, 1959 in Miami Beach – but that’s no excuse for the plethora of Jewish women television stereotypes: the dead first wife (who we find out in the second episode was named “Molly” as if she was her mother, but then I can’t figure out why her sister looks like such a shicksa), the spoiled little rich girl protesting her upcoming bat mitzvah, and “the necklace of bubbes” on the beach, as one of the adult sons says his late mother described them. The patriarch “Ike Evans” (played by Jeffrey Dean Morgan) criticizes his daughter “Lauren” (played by Taylor Blackwell) as she prepares for the New Year’s Eve performance of Frank Sinatra at his ersatz Fountainbleu Hotel: If you’re going to wear your skirt this short, you better start shaving your legs. More commentary coming, hopefully before the second season, as the stereotypes got worse and worse. (More commentary forthcoming.) (updated 10/1/2012)

Joan and Melissa Rivers in Joan & Melissa: Joan Knows Best? – 2nd season (on WE). Will the 2nd season of their “reality show” have Jewish references, as inevitably came up in this promotional interview “A Joan Rivers Moment” with Ralph Gardner Jr. in the 1/23/2012 Wall Street Journal?: “In private, Joan's obsessions sound little different than those of a thousand other Upper East Side mothers. Getting into the right schools—first for Melissa and now for Melissa's 11-year-old son, Cooper. Who knew that Melissa, in her early 40s, attended Park Avenue Christian, a tony preschool, before the family moved to Los Angeles? Joan admitted that she wouldn't reveal the school's full name to her Jewish relatives. ‘I said, 'It's called Park Avenue.'"
While the 1st episode of the season, “Skintervention” had no Jewish references as Melissa tried to convince Joan not to have additional plastic surgery, her mother made a frank, poignant declaration that she’s competing against the likes of Jane Fonda and Betty White as show business age peers, so she has to keep looking the best possible. As presented in the 2nd episode, “High Times”, the only Jewish reference when they are hosting Melissa’s boyfriend’s out-of-town parents, the Zimmermans, is when Joan is, in effect, performing for them, as they expect her to do, while she guides them around Hollywood. In a tour of Madame Toussaud’s Wax Museum, she poses next to a replica to mock: Mel Gibson with a Jew! (commentary coming on each episode -- updated 3/22/2012)

Annie Edison in the 3rd Season of Community (on NBC): I only discovered halfway through this season that one of the ditzy characters, the ultra-competitive one played by Alison Brie, was Jewish. (I’m catching up on earlier seasons in repeats beginning 2013.) In the “Advanced Gay” episode by Matt Murray, the farcically extremely prejudiced father of the oldest student in the Greendale (CO) Community College study class pointed her out as “a Jewess”. Then in “Foosball and Nocturnal Vigilantism”, by Chris Kula, she nervously embroidered a cover-up tale after she broke a Batman: Dark Knight special edition DVD: Some of my jewelry is missing. A necklace. It was gold. White gold with emeralds. With my name engraved in Hebrew. It was a bat mitzvah gift. From my nana. She was a Rockette. She married a count. Who was blind. He loved her for her mind. “Abed” dresses as Batman to put together the clues in the theft: Hebrew-themed jewelry. She helpfully adds: My nana gave it to me. But what I especially like is the expectation of “Troy Barnes” (played by Donald Glover) that she would come up with something complicated: I know you think you can think yourself out of this with your thinkingness, but don’t think too much. You just have to confess. And she finally does. But I’m going to use that phrase as a funny take on smart Jews.
”Studies in Modern Movement”, written by Adam Countee, generated a #Annie’s Move T-shirt for sale at the NBC Store after “Troy” and “Abed”s twitter hashtag for a real time account of her move into their apartment, during the original broadcast:
In the annual Christmas episode, “Regional Holiday Music” by Steve Basilone & Annie Mebane, the zealously Christian African-American describes her plans: I will be spending Christmas giving gifts to the more persuadable of our Jewish friends. “Annie” begs to differ: I wouldn’t call an unannounced visit from your pastor a gift. And don’t bother this year. I’ll be at the movies with my bubbie. Another classmate is confused: You’re not taking both of them? “Annie” tries to explain: Well, one’s dead. The rest was a hilarious satire of Glee. “Annie” enthusiastically gets into the spirit of the season as a sexy Santa’s Helper: This is one of the many costume changes I’ll be doing during the show. I guess we’re a shoo-in for regionals, right? When the cute guy “Jeff Winger” she has a crush on protests her participation in the choir and Christmas: Annie, you’re an intelligent woman – and you’re Jewish!, she purrs: Guess I have a lot to learn about holiday traditions. and deliciously sings a la Betty Boop/Marilyn Monroe or Eartha Kitt’s “Santa Baby” in Teach Me How to Understand Christmas. When she lands on his knee, he grinches: At some point you reach a point of diminishing returns on the sexiness., and she pouts that she doesn’t understand.
Song lyric co-writer Megan Ganz explained (to Josh Kurp in Uproxx, 3/15/2012) about “Annie”s role in this episode, with zero reference to the irony of “Annie” being Jewish: “Alison was so funny. . .Every character in that episode is being lured into the glee club by another character, and they use that person’s weakness. . . For Jeff, what Annie is appealing to is his attraction to her infantile sort of nature. But that’s the same thing that sort of repulses him in a way, her youth. But obviously we’re sort of satirizing TV shows that do use women singing and dancing in provocative ways to lure attention, so that’s a very basic story point. There are songs like ‘Santa Baby’that show that men are interested in this sort of infantilized woman that’s kind of baby doll and dumb. And in the song, she’s getting dumber and dumber and crawling on the ground and trying to eat mistletoe because she doesn’t understand what it is, so it’s just a parody of those types of songs and also playing at the dynamic between Jeff and Annie.”
“Contemporary Impressionists” had a funny batch of putative Jewish women at a bar mitzvah fawning excitedly over a strutting “Jeff Winger” (played by Joel McHale) as a fake Ryan Reynolds, but the joke was on his egotism. In the satirical “Pillows and Blankets”, Season 3, Episode 14 first shown April 5, 2012, written by Andy Bobrow, as a funny mockumentary of Ken Burns’s The Civil War, the ponderous narrator identifies “Annie” as A health care administration student who turned a storage room into a sactuary for soldiers with broken glasses and lightly grazed testicles. . .A proud humanitarian providing relief to both sides. In the concluding parody of PBS fundraising DVDs, Greendale TV hosts offer: “From Labs to Riches: The Annie’s Boobs Story.”
In “Course Listing Unavailable”, written by Tim Saccardo, a classmate at the community college dies in a meth lab explosion and Annie implores the study group to discuss his death seriously. The tycoon “Pierce Hawthorne” (played by Chevy Chase) retorts: Why is it always about the Holocaust with you people? (updated 10/14/2014)

Harriet Korn in the 2nd Season of Harry’s Law (on NBC) In the 5th episode, the central, middle-aged bully broad attorney, played by Kathy Bates, suddenly proclaimed she was Jewish, in “Bad to Worse”, written by series creator David E. Kelley. That was news to me after watching the first season, and seemed typical of Kelley just throwing that in to stir the pot in an episode that started out about her defending a teacher of evolution to a creationist pastor.
In “The Rematch”, by Kelley, Amanda Johns and Susan Dickes, “Gloria and Abe Gold” (played by Katherine Helmond and Fyvush Finkel) are a lawyer’s first and oldest clients. The wife proposes the unethical and illegal process of divorce so that her Alzheimer’s husband can afford to be in an appropriate residential facility while she can keep the house. The story line is a bit of an opportunity to rail against how the health care system treats the elderly while Medicare is going broke due to such fraud, but the only reason for the couple being Jewish, with no connection to “Harry”, seems to be so that the ill husband can be a former stand up comic and Kelley can be the self-righteous defender of Jewish stand-up comics’ wives. Far beyond the Henny Youngman/Don Rickles mode, the old comic randomly spouts old routines that raunchily insult his wife (I didn’t get every word to transcribe). When the lawyer offers to pay for 24-hour care, she still tearfully insists on divorce-- turns out there’s a widower she wants to marry. For 60 years I had to hear to those jokes, always at my expense, in the privacy of my own home, at dinner parties. Now it’s all I listen to. How often do I have to listen to my genitalia be referred to as a ‘black lagoon’? I can’t take it anymore, not for a month, not for a day. I want that man gone. . . Chances are he’ll never know. “Harry”s lawyer is disgusted that she not only wanted to lie to the government, but to her lawyer as well. The wife returns to explain: I know how disappointed you must be in me. I’ve spent 60 years loving that man. I’ve been his nurse-- and more his brunt. I’ve never had a life, Tommy, outside of this. I have a chance of one now, however short, with a person I very much love. Is it so wrong for me to know a little bit of that life before I go? The lawyers talk about her case at the end of the day at a bar and sympathize. His lawyer tries to get “Abe” to stop telling jokes so she can explain the divorce, but he slides in and out of patter. I get the house. She can keep the mirrors so she can see what I had to look at all these years. . .We always said we’d wait ‘til the kids are dead. What am I going to do without her?. . .We were happy for so long--and then we met. When I make love to her, I like to think of something nice, like not making love to her. Oh, I have a recurring nightmare about my wife's funeral, like it would never happen. Ha ha hahaha. The lawyers try to explain to him that they’ll make sure he’s taken care of.
In “American Girl”, by Kelley and Lawrence Broch, “Harry” blasts a cop for stopping her driving her rented Mercedes Benz to a quail hunting weekend: I’m rich, white and Republican. She explains herself in a monologue that was a convoluted link to the Jewish American experience: Principles are important. . .My father and I used to go hunting. We’d go hunting once or twice a year. Then one day, on my 12th birthday, he decided he was gong to take me to a private club. We wre both so excited. We got all dressed up in proper hunting clothes, planned to have lunch. When we get to the club, they turned us away because we were Jewish. We were excluded. On the drive home, my father’s hands were shaking. “This isn’t what America is uposed to be.” We’re becoming less inclusive every day. It’s not what America is supposed to be.
In the series finale, “Onward and Upward”, written by Kelley, she gets stuck with the body of her deceased first husband who she hadn’t seen in decades, but whose last name she kept. She snaps that he’s Jewish so has to be buried as soon as possible or he’ll go to Jewish hell. But her mostly negative reminiscences of him have zero Jewish connection as she rants that while he encouraged her to move on from his legal secretary to go to law school, the best that she can say about him was that he was a “party”. But she does pull out their youthful wedding photo, and later recalls happy scenes from their wedding. At night, she visits his grave where she had engraved on the stone “Husband. Scoundrel,” where she admits to her colleagues that she loved him. (updated 5/27/2012)

Dr. Zoe Hart in the 1st Season of Hart of Dixie (the CW, out on DVD) On the 5th episode “Faith & Infidelilty”, written by Deb Fordham, the titular, displaced New Yorker “Dr. Zoe Hart” (played by Rachel Bilson, whose father is Jewish) concluded the episode dealing with the minister and his wife by admitting she was “half-Jewish” to her African-American landlord the mayor, who assured her she’d be welcome at church anyway. Though by Judaism’s criteria that means she’s Jewish, when her mother “Candice” (played by JoBeth Williams) showed up in town in “The Undead & the Unsaid”, by Donald Todd, to reconcile about lying about who her biological father was, there was zero reference to her background. Instead, there was a vague explanation by hunky “George Tucker” (Scott Porter) to his blonde fiancée that “Zoe” just reminded him of things he missed from his New York sojourn. In the episode “Homecoming & Coming Home”, by Rina Mimoun, her best friend from NYC brings her a care package of bagels from Zabar’s. In “The Pirate & The Practice” episode, by Debra Fordham, she fit herself into the town’s unique celebration of “Planksgiving” by publicly declaring herself a “Jewish pirate – Achoy!” with an exaggerated “ch” sound. But, oddly, the December episode “Hairdos & Holidays”, written by David Babcock, had zilch such references at all, even when the hunky lawyer shared reminisces of the season in New York, particularly of the Rockefeller Center tree, which only made her joke about the weather difference, not even when she coached a pageant contestant in Christmas carols.
In the “Hell’s Belles” episode, written by Donald Todd, the doctor is seeking out her father’s heritage by joining the Bluebell Belles, but there’s a vague reference to her mother’s side. In completing the initiation process of being a servant for the members, one comments on her tardiness: I thought you’d gotten caught up in the rapture. Oh, do your people go to heaven? The doctor finesses: With my family, it’s Ft. Lauderdale. Eschewing Southern tradition, she professionally diagnoses the group’s fertility problems as psychological. Very oddly, the “Mistresses & Misunderstandings” episode, written by Beth Schwartz, emphasized how the town folk, especially the ladies, don’t like her, don’t want to be seen with her, let alone be friends with her – but with zero reference to her being Jewish as a possible reason, trying to avoid a frisson of anti-Semitism in this sunny, bucolic Southern town.
In the “Aliens & Aliases” episode, written by Debra Fordham, even her temporary assistant “Tom” is aware of her background when he announces: I brought snacks in honor of our Zoe’s cultural heritage: bagels. Zoe: Or biscuits with the middle cut out. But in “Tributes & Triangle”, written by Michelle Paradise, she is thinking of changing her name from her adoptive father’s, without even consider using her mother’s maiden name before she decides on her biological father’s. This is directly followed up in “Heart to Hart”, written by Rina Mimoun, where her nemesis cooks up a thank you dinner for her adoptive father the heart surgeon coming to operate on her fiancée’s father – of potatoe pancakes, though she calls them something in French that neither I nor any fan site caught so may or may not be accurate, when she added: I thought your father would appreciate a kosher meal. “Zoe” tartly corrects her assumption: My mother’s Jewish, My father isn’t. The Southern belle sweetly, um, as butter, responds: How about you sit next to me and I can learn more about your ethnic origins? By the end, “Zoe” reconciles with her adoptive father and he asks her not to change her last name. (updated 10/1/2012)

Mrs. Wolowitz in the 5th season of Big Bang Theory (on CBS, 5th season out on DVD) (As heard and referred) continued blasting the voice and snarky descriptions of a monster of an emasculating Jewish mother, who I am only now catching up on, let alone that devoted fans find her hysterically funny. Until I get around to posting my transcriptions, that I can vouch for, of all the nasty comments by and about “Mrs. Wolowitz”, fan episode transcripts are eventually posted. In “The Pulled Groin Extrapolation” episode, teleplay by Bill Prady, Steven Molaro, and Dave Goetsch, and story by Chuck Lorre, Eric Kaplan, and Jim Reynolds, “Howard Wolowitz” (played by Simon Helberg) genially tells his unconvinced, blonde, very gentile fiancée that they’ll be living with his mother: Why would she move out? It’s her house. . .It’s a great house. Plenty of room. If we have kids Mom’s there to help. You know, when she tells the “3 Little Pigs” story she really has hair on her chinny-chin-chin. “Bernadette Rostenkowski” (played by Melissa Rauch): I'm not going to live with your mother. Not now. Not ever. “Howard”: Somebody, obviously, has some mommy issues. He proposes: Before we make any kind of decision where we live how about a trial run? Stay here for a weekend. See what it would be like. His mother’s reaction, as usual, shouted through the door (voiced by Carol Ann Susi): If she’s willing to give the milk away for free, who am I to object. . . After all your sleep-overs with the little brown boy, a girl is a relief., a reference to his South Asian Indian friend “Raj” (whose portrayal is as stereotyped as the Jewish mother, and yet more indications that she’s oddly brought in from the wrong generation gap). Among the stream of clichés about what his mother does for him, his fiancée asks: Does your mother always cut your meat for you? “Howard” assures: Only when it’s fatty. Don’t worry, you’ll do it when we’re married. Among even more insults by the mother and about her: Let me know when you’re done canoodling; mama needs a foot rub. The very crude yelling mother announces details of her business from the bathroom, even as “Howard” emphasizes their Jewishness by proclaiming, though this was first shown in October: It’s Latke Night. In what inexplicably to me is the most popular quote on the fansites about this triangle, when “Bernadette” greets him the next morning with Good Morning, handsome!, he assumes it’s his mother. But having prepared his pancakes breakfast-in-bed with her in the kitchen, the sweet, mild-mannered, low-talking “Bernadette” has learned to yell back at her in the same tone, and starts talking to him with a Yiddish inflection, as she heads back to the kitchen for some butter.
In “The Russian Rocket Reaction”, teleplay by Chuck Lorre, Eric Kaplan, and Maria Ferrari, story by Bill Prady, Steven Molaro, and Jim Reynolds, “Bernadette” sneaks out of his bedroom after he announces his unilateral decision accept an offer to be a payload specialist for equipment he, as an engineer, designed for a mission to the International Space Station. His mother is then heard, shouting offscreen as usual: Over my dead body my son goes into outer space! He complains to his friends: She went behind my back and turned my own mother against me! His best friend “Raj” from India, with similar parental issues, commiserates: She’s going to have to convince your mother to let you go into space. Talking to her girlfriends, it slowly dawns on “Bernadette” that she made a mistake: I took our love and threw it under his bus-sized mother! When she goes to his house to apologize, his mother objects to his pretending not to be there, with an oddly adjectival use of a Yiddish noun: What kind of a schmuck play is that? When she overhears them kissing, her warning is again pointedly given a Jewish touch: Make up all you want – your tuchas is not leaving this planet!
”The Good Guy Fluctuation”, story by David Goetsch, Chuck Lorre and Maria Ferrari, teleplay by Bill Prady, Steven Molaro and Steve Holland, put an aural costume on “Bernadette” in a Halloween prank-themed episode. When the usual barking roar of Who’s at the door? emanates from the “Wolowitz” house, “Howard” gleefully welcomes “Sheldon”: That’s not my mom – it’s Bernadette! Even the socially inept, borderline Asperger’s, “Sheldon” reacts to this continuing transformation: Really – that’s very unsettling. (very behind on more -- updated 9/11/2012)
The Big Bang Theory Star Melissa Rauch On Nerds, New Jersey And Real Housewives’ in Huffington Post , 10/11/2011, Nicki Gostn: “Q: Do you get fan mail from nerds? [Rauch] I do. I also get fan mail from girl scientists and Jewish dudes excited that [co-star Simon] Helberg was dating a girl like Bernadette.”

In the middle of Rachel Berry and Sugar Motta in the 3rd season of Glee (on Fox, out on DVD), the cast appeared on Bravo’s Inside the Actor’s Studio, and Lea Michelle very specifically explained that while her father’s family was Sephardic Jews, she was raised in her mother’s Roman Catholic faith, with her father accompanying them to church. She noted that she didn’t look like anyone else in her school – but that was because the rest of the girls had plastic surgery. She related that “Rachel” was like her at age 8 or 9, because that’s when she was on Broadway: “It was my oxygen.”
”Rachel” continued to be pilloried with nasty put-downs in a Jewish context that were supposedly balanced by grudging recognition of her singing talent. In the opener “The Purple Piano Project”, by Brad Falchuk, “Kurt” reports on short “Rachel” and tall Finn”s climax from last season’ nationals: 'The Kiss That Missed' already has 20,000 views on YouTube and the comments section is just full of pithy banter, like ‘Why's that T-Rex eating the Jew?’, even as she had the ego crush of facing a roomful of competing college auditioners as talented as she: I've never been so humiliated in my life. . . We have to move to another town, erase our identities and resign to a sad life of community theatre. But she wasn’t the only Jewish girl made a butt of unredeemed jokes. Played by Vanessa Lengies, she introduces herself: I'm Sugar Motta and I have self-diagnosed Asperger's, so I can pretty much say whatever I want. I’m like a diplomat’s daughter. . . I want to be a big, big star. . . When I saw you guys singing and dancing in the auditorium, I thought: I'm so much better than you.. She’s beyond unaware of how spectacularly bad her audition of “Big Spender” was: I worked that song like a hooker pole. African-American “Mercedes” recognizes her advantage: Her daddy is the rich Jew who donated the purple pianos. Dozens of fan sites have not picked up this pejorative quote correctly.
In the following “I Am Unicorn”, by series creator Ryan Murphy, her indulgent father ”Al Motta” (played by Rick Pasqualone) of “Motta’s Pianos” that had repossessed the pianos from foreclosed homes, funds a competing show choir: My daughter is a supernova! At the same time, “Rachel” is waiting to be anointed the role of “Maria” in the West Side Story production: which means I’m going to be even more self-centered than usual. The coach votes for her: She’s Jewish but that helps with the whole Puerto Rican thing.
But in “Asian F” by Ian Brennen, ”Mercedes” does not interpret that “Rachel” gets the lead role based on her talent -- Why is everybody around here always trying not to hurt her feelings?. Out of spite she joins the rival group.
”Pot ‘o’ Gold”, by Ali Adler, continued showing the Jewish girls in a nasty light, without any complimentary balance. “Kurt” jibes about a photo of “Rachel”: Did you airbrush out your jowls? She’s even more egomaniac than usual abut the West Side Story plans: You can’t cancel my musical! I was considering changing my name to Maria! When “Santana” joins the alternative, female glee club, she intimidates “Sugar Motta” as a “Richy Bitch”, who instantly capitulates: I just wanted to be on the winning team for once.
The snide remarks about “Rachel” continued in “Mash-Off” by Michael Hitchcock. Even as she tries to apologize to “Kurt” for running against him for class president, her retorts: You should have thought of me before you walked all over me in your borderline sociopathic climb to the top. He bends a bit when she turns “a riveting twist” to pull out of the race, when she declares, in a bit of a demeaning way: Consider me your campaign slut. “Santana” cuttingly references her in mocking her boyfriend: Finn’s blubber would last for 8 nights of Hanukkah.
In “I Kissed A Girl”, by Matthew Hodgson, even this seeming altruistic concern for “Kurt”s election is revealed to be selfish, leading her to act unethically and get punished: I haven’t been this worried about a vote since [American Idol]. Kurt needs this election to get into NYADA. More importantly, he’s clearly the superior candidate. . .I mean, come on. . .I had to take a stand. . .They’re all so lost in their own worlds they can’t see how important this is to me! Elections have consequences! And the consequence of Brittany winning this election is that I’ll have to move to New York without my best gay. What if I need an emergency make-over, or a last minute soufflé? (updated 8/6/2012, more commentary forthcoming))

Ziva David on NCIS in her 7th season (The 9th season on CBS, out on DVD) In the season opener, “Nature of the Beast” by Gary Glasberg, “Gibbs” announces that her probation is over and she’s now a “journeyman” Special Agent. So let’s see how Israeli, let alone Jewish her character stays. Her past was also forgotten in Slate’s Secret Agent Woman: “Why are there so many female spies on television?” by June Thomas, posted on 11/17/2011. A New York Times piece on 2/7/2012 about the show’s robust ratings to achieve 200 episodes didn’t mention her at all.
In “The Penelope Papers”, by Nicole Mirante-Matthews, she makes one brief mention of her past with only a vague reference to her family connections to the Mossad: My father attended every birthday party, but his mind was always elsewhere.
In “Safe Harbor”, by Reed Steiner and Christopher J. Waild, there is a passing reference to “Ziva”’s heritage in an episode about Lebanese refugees who may or may be terrorists. She and the mother, played by noted Iranian actress Shohreh Aghdashloo, find common ground in family ties. “Ziva” concedes: I had a sister and a brother. I also had a mother. They were killed. The mother sympathizes: We come from troubled lands you and I. At the end, “Ziva”, as usual, turns this train of thought into her daddy issue when she confides in her boss: My mother never told me what kind of man my father was. Perhaps she thought I was not strong enough to handle it. “Gibbs” advises: No, she was just being a mom. She: How do you know? He: Perspective.
One of the closest mentions this season to even her Israeli roots was a, um, veiled reference to her Middle Eastern expertise in “Engaged, Part 1”, written by Gina Lucita Monreal. When she translates Pashtun, “Tony” is unusually admiring: It’s her #9 language. Our very own ‘Beauty of Berlitz’. She retorts: Actually it’s #7. “Part 2”, written by Gary Glasberg, had an even odder reference, as she asserts her confidence when they go on a rescue mission in Afghanistan: I grew up in this region. . .I can hold my own. Only because no one knew she was an ex-Mossad agent. Maybe her colleagues have forgotten too. Let alone that in the Christmas Eve- episode “Newborn King”, written by Christopher J. Waild, she made a Christmas reference to “no room at the inn”, but nothing Jewish.
”Housekeeping”, by Scott Williams, dealt further with “Ziva”s romance, opening with her frustratation that “Agent Ray Cruz” hasn’t returned seven phone messages to confirm their New Year’s Eve date. “Tony” teases her about going Some place quiet with someone she can count on, hopefully. But she’s been reduced to the petty lovelorn: That’s the word, is it not-- hopefully. Even if you think you can count on someone, you often cannot. “Tony”: Agent Cruz seems to be having communication issues.. The “Ziva” who used to seem like one of the guys, now talks like a chick flick: I’m losing my patience. “Tony” commiserates, for all those “shipper” fans, other than me, who want them to get together: We have a lot in common in that respect. “Ziva”: I am grateful to have someone in my life just as romantically dysfunctional as I am. “Tony”: Agent David, do you really consider me to be in your life? And her phone rings: What should I say? He advises: Say hello. When a blonde female agent thanks “Ziva” for retrieving an email from her mother, she asks if “Ziva” has plans for family, outside NCIS. “Ziva” : Family? Some day. But that day seems increasingly distant at the moment.
In “A Desperate Man”, written by Nicole Mirante-Matthews, “Ziva” is even more mired in romantic conventions tied up with her daddy issues. She comes in the office asking if the many phone calls from “C-I-Ray” (as “Tony” refers to him) can be blocked to her home and office phone. “Tony” pleads “Ray”s case, having taken his calls: The guy’s desperate. “Ziva”s mad: You’re supposed to be on my side! . . . Stay out of it! . . . He does not appreciate me. “Tony protests” how many women have said that to him and his endless number of dates, as “McGee” ripostes. “Tony” justifies: What about Ziva? She's like a bad Israeli romance novel. She's not exactly the picture of emotional stability. “Ziva” retorts : That is rich, coming from you. “Tony”: You're saying I'm emotionally unstable, Ziva? and “McGee” interjects again. Later, “Ziva” confides to “Tony” more about her relationship – and even tears up over a petty issue: While he was overseas you know we stayed connected as best we could, trying to make whatever we had work. And now he was finally back. We planned this, this lovely dinner but he never showed, Tony. I waited in that restaurant alone for 3 hrs, no text, no call, nothing. When I saw him next, it was just the following morning and he then, he just said he got caught up with work. (more commentary forthcoming; incompletely updated 8/22/2012)

Entourage - Mrs. Ari Gold in the 8th season (on HBO). Creator Doug Ellin referenced her just briefly in discussing the final season on Charlie Rose, 7/22/2011, when he was asked the difference between how the character “Ari Gold” he created started out “as a low life” vs. how actor Jeremy Piven portrayed him: “And now he’s one of the great family men we’ve seen on TV. . .In the first episode he was talking about having sex with supermodels, and 8 years later we know he’s never cheated on his wife, he’s home every night, and she controls the family.” Though he wasn’t asked if she gets a name by the finale!
So I was quite annoyed when I got around to watching the final season that the first thing Ellin did in “Home Sweet Home” was break them up! Even as “Ari” pleads how he misses her and wants to come home, she sounds like some Beverly Hills Housewife cliché: I’m still discovering things about myself. . . I’m not ready. . .I’ve been seeing someone. Next, in “Out With A Bang”, by Ally Musika, she explains why she is with celebrity restauranteur Bobby Flay, who “Ari” sneers is just “a cook”: I need exposure to other things. . .He’s a chef. He’s a businessman. He’s kind, and respectful and generous. She’s furious at her husband’s anger and revenge tactics when he declares war on the restaurant, but by the next episode he’s first dating a younger woman and then sleeping with an old girlfriend his “Mrs” was always jealous of. Her name is finally casually revealed in the last couple of episodes: “Melissa”. And even their daughter “Sarah” gets to show off her smarts. There’s more arguments, that I’ll eventually detail, before they reunite by declaring their love for each other in the series finale,. (incomplete but updated 3/29/2012)

Jackie Goodman in the 1st Season of Friday Night Dinner (on BBC America, originally shown on U.K.’s Channel 4) – seems to be an old-fashioned sitcom “Mum” (played by Tamsin Greig, who gets to do a lot more on Showtime’s much funnier Episodes). From the first episode, we pretty much only know they’re Jewish because of the titular get-together of the grown sons with their parents, and the usual symbolism of the menorah on the dining room cabinet. At least the Jewish mother is a red-head for a change. (8/8/2011)

Curb Your Enthusiasm - Susie Greene etc. (HBO, out on DVD) (Commentary forthcoming) (6/6/2012)



2010/2011 Season

Mrs. Wolowitz in the 4th season of Big Bang Theory (on CBS) (As heard and referred) Until I get around to posting my transcriptions, that I can vouch for, of all the nasty comments by and about “Mrs. Wolowitz”, fan episode transcripts are eventually posted. I by chance caught a rerun of the 4th season’s“The Cohabitation Formulation” episode of Big Bang Theory, a year and a half after it’s initial CBS February 17, 2011 broadcast, and was surprised to discover that since the inaugural season Fall 2007 a repeatedly heard but not seen character who seems to reinforce every negative, infantalizing image of Jewish mothers on TV in the ranting telephone calls and shouts of “Mrs. Wolowitz” (voiced by Carol Ann Susi) as she henpecks her live-in engineer son “Howard” (played by Simon Helberg). I wonder which of the six credited writers is so obsessed with Philip Roth’s Portnoy’s Complaint to author her stereotyped lines in the teleplay by Bill Prady, Steven Molaro, and Jim Reynolds, and the story by Chuck Lorre (series creator), Lee Aronsohn, and Dave Goetsch. On AMC's Mad Men, the audience may have perceived as Jewish the elderly secretary "Ida – 'Queen of Perversions' – Blankenship", who is revealed as the senior partner's ex-lover. Though there were never any specific references, the actress Randee Heller, who memorably laid down her surprising zingers, seemed to think so, per this AMC interview: "Q: Is Miss Blankenship's accent your own? Where does it come from? A: It's really a potpourri. I grew up with grandparents that were from Russia and they spoke Yiddish, so there's a little bit of that. And then my mom and my aunt and my father's family all were raised in Brooklyn. They were first-generation Americans, so we got a little Brooklyn thing going. And then I moved to Long Island, so I have that. It's a mixture of many accents." (10/10/2010)

Even in the fourth season of Showtime's Californication (available on DVD) I'm still only classifying “Marcy Runkle” (played by Pamela Adlon, née Segall) as a putative Jewish woman, though in the 4th episode "Monkey Business", by Gabe Roth and Matt Patterson, she uttered a distinctive Jewish reference in the midst of this typical foul-mouthed rant (what a couple of episodes later her new lover affectionately terms "obscene verbal diarrhea") to her best friend after her "golden showers" on a pregnancy test turned it positive: I can either vaccum this nightmare out of my twat or I can settle in for a burden of a lifetime. How did this happen? Why does Hashem hate me? Her friend asks whose it is, and she explains it can't be her husband's: That's kid's all ripped to shreds. The friend suggests Rick Springfield. Uh uh. He was all about the ass. Plus he never came. I came nine times and he was about a puff of smoke. . .There were a couple of CraigsList casual encounters here or there. But I never let them raw dog me. Shit, it could be an immaculate conception. . . Fuck, I'm not good enough to get knocked-up by God? Some friend you are! . . Do you think I'd make a good mother?. . .That little mutant would be fucking lucky to have me. And she weeps. As a concierge "waxologist", she dropped a Yiddish word in "Lawyers, Guns, and Money", written by Vanessa Reisen, when she showed up at a Hollywood mogul's house to do the whole Kardashian. . .but you don't have to go through the full body "meshugas". The character made zero Jewish references in the following two seasons. (updated 7/1/2013)

Two putative Jewish women appeared in summer season finales. In the "No Exit" episode of Hawthorne (on TNT, out on DVD), story by Adam Fierro and Glen Mazzara and teleplay by Mazzara, bickering elderly couple "Mr. and Mrs. Rickles" (Bill Macy and Debra Mooney) seem to be named in honor of the nasty comedian. His talk is full of Yiddishisms and references to having just having eaten corned beef at a deli; her sarcastic ripostes may have a Yiddish lilt: Threats! Be a man already!. . .If you were made of money instead of hot air, maybe I'd know what luxury was! Married 48 years, they smile at a quarreling doctor and nurse who have been dating, and in reaction they cuddle indulgently. They reunite with a kiss at the end of the episode's crisis. In Huge (ABC Family), the two part "Parents' Weekend" (Part 1 by Gayle Abrams, Part 2 by series creator Savannah Dooley), we meet the parents of "Ian Schonfeld" (Ari Stidham), who had been prominently wearing a Star of David necklace all season at the camp for overweight teens. The parents (played by Phil Abrams and Nealla Gordon) have no particular Jewish identity. They upset their son by first being overly solicitious to each other, which is evidently unusual behavior because their son says they usually argue, even in group therapy, then to announce to him that they will be getting a divorce. (I haven't yet read the book by Sasha Paley that the series is based on to know if there are Jewish characters in the original.) (8/7/2010)

Warehouse 13 (on SyFy) showed in the "Secret Santa" episode by Robert Goodman that even in science fiction shows Jewish mothers are in absentia. The family history of the boss "Artie Nielsen" (played by Saul Rubinek) was revealed when the youngest staffer of his Top Secret Government Agency schemed to have him reunited with his estranged father "Isadore 'Izzy' Weisfelt" (played by Judd Hirsch with a heavy Yiddish accent), who throws out a couple of Yiddish words. They bond over teasing memories about female relatives "Sylvia" and "Trudy", but their old grudges surface. "Dad": You spit on us! Your mother and me, we worked two jobs to send you to Juilliard. And you threw it all away to work for those fascists! "Artie": The U.S. government I work for! They're not fascists! "Izzy": Oh no! You never heard of McCarthy? "Artie": Oh, please! Dad: I couldn't work for years because – what? I had family in Russia? "Artie" ominously: I know all about the family in Russia, Dad. Dad: Is that right? They turn on the young staffer, but "Artie"s Yiddishkeit re-bonds them. "Artie": She nudged her way into existence! Dad: That's very good. Nudged!. . .Arthur, you [say?] your work was necessary and I believe you. . .Enough already, you get an A. You want to work yourself down to a B? It was when you walked away from music that was hard. "Artie" brings out his musical composition and they sit together at the piano, even as the dad continues to good-naturedly keep complaining about how he plays the "beautiful" piece. The dad calls the young staffer "the annoying gentile", but she leads them in grace in Hebrew before Christmas dinner, even as the dad jokingly complains about her doing it wrong. (12/13/2010)

So many crime series set in Florida, yet so few Jewish women! At least in the first season of The Glades, in "Mucked Up", by Lois Johnson, we heard about the bat mitzvah of "Esther Feldman", only because the Latino forensic medical examiner was pleased to be invited so he could network with her father the judge, even though he had to leave early for the case. (updated 10/20/2010)

Similarly, so many crime series set in NYC, yet so few Jewish women. Castle gratuitously stuck one in for humor, in "Anatomy of a Murder", written by Terence Paul Winter. Opening at the funeral of the Orthodox "Ephraim Mankowsky", his coffin falls and along with his body is a pretty, dead blonde. An older woman mourner, identified in the credits as "Tova", played by Cynthia Frost, calmly asks with a Yiddish inflection: Who's the shicksa?, and snorts that the father of 10 drank himself to death. Law and Order: Special Victims Unit also finally had a Jewish woman, in "Penetration" by Christina M. Torres and Dawn DeNoon -- albeit as a rape and murder victim, "Jennifer Briggs", only briefly seen in a photo. She was a 27-year-old accountant with a jewelry firm in the Diamond District who lived in SoHo. After a bad break-up, she joined "Project Mitzvah" which sets up correspondents with Jewish prisoners. But violent rapist "Seth Coleman" (played by Jeremy Davidson, who, ironically, wrote and directed the Holocaust survivors' drama Tickling Leo) faked his way into the program to get a Jewish pen pal. . .I've always had a thing for Jewish girls. They're freaks in bed.
On HBO's Boardwalk Empire, there are plenty of Jewish gangsters, notably the real Arnold Rothstein and Meyer Lansky. But even though there was a bar mitzvah scene late in the 1st season, and the other ethnic thugs have families, the only Jewish woman seen, even briefly, was a shocked mother who was called on to translate a mug's profanely scabrous Yiddish taunt of his torturer, even as she tries to protect her young son from what she's seeing and hearing. (updated 12/18/2010)

In the British science fiction import Outcasts (on BBC America, following one 8-episode season on BBC), about Earth refugees colonizing the planet Carpathia in 2040, “Dr. Stella Isen” (played by blonde Hermione Norris) was suddenly confronted in the 3rd episode, written by series creator Ben Richards and Simon Block, by a guy with an envious hang-up on Jewish scientists: You are Jewish? She reluctantly clarified: My family were. My husband is. What does it matter? This plot point may be related to the religious fervor sweeping the colony, even as the president insists it is secular. Her resentful daughter “Lily Isen” (played by Jeanne Kietzmann), who her frantic mom specifies while searching for her that she looks like her father, arrived on the last shuttle from endangered Earth. They reconcile after their years apart: They must have really needed you. Even as “Dr. Isen” asks “Lily” to move into her quarters, she warns: I take my work pretty seriously. I won’t be around much.
Her Jewish identity is not part of her official character bio: “Stella is Head of Protection and Security (PAS), the group that aims to maintain order on the new planet. She has sacrificed everything to save humanity, and desperately misses those she left behind on earth.” (7/8/2011)

In The Good Wife, Alan Cumming is not only surprisingly convincing as the fairly observantly Jewish political campaign manager "Eli Gold", but in "Silver Bullet", teleplay by Robert King and Michelle King, story by Steve Lichtman, he was shown to be straight and a father to a daughter "Melissa" (played by Sarah Steele). He opens the episode with: No. Let me try that again, No. She rejoins: You're so cute when you're being emphatic! Your brow gets all-- He: And the key word here is emphatic. She: Mom said yes. He: Because Mom likes to make me the mean divorced dad. I say no. She: Why? He: Why do I say no? Because I do not want some Palestinian version of yourself blowing you up. She: Dad it's a kibbutz. Unless one of the tractors blows up, I'm going to be fine. Do you know how hypocritical this is? You're the one who always pushed me towards religion. [Note: She conflates Judaism and Israel.] He: Of course I know how hypocritical it is. I'm a parent! It's my perogative. . .Are we having dinner Thursday night? She: Unless you back out. You look happy – are you seeing someone?. . .She smiles flirtatiously as the young pollster enters and introduces himself. She: I'm the daughter. Her father warns him: She's 18 years old! When she calls to cancel dinner plans, he invites a young Latino woman he's been spying on. But the daughter shows up at the restaurant: Hello there. Dad: I thought you couldn't make it, Melissa. She: Change of plans Dad. . . .So you're the reason my dad's so happy. . . And how old are you?. . .I'm so going to Israel.. . .I'll let you two eat in peace. Love you, Dad. Don't forget protection.. When the young woman catches him in his lies, his explanation references his daughter: Because I'm a hypocrite.
That Jewish girls and women so rarely pop up on this Chicago-based/New York-filmed series is noteworthy as the co-creator Michelle King is Jewish (as identified in "The Good Wife and Its Women" by Jan Hoffman, The New York Times, 4/29/2011.) (updated 5/3/2011)

I don't usually watch "reality shows", but I was curious to see the Jewish references in the second time TLC's What Not to Wear made-over a Jewish former TV child star, this time Facts of Lifes star Mindy Cohn. While she was adamant about selecting clothes for comfort, her Jewishness was identified with her past and her "before" image. While her friends refered to "her shlumpy style", including Rachel, a childhood friend, she refers to herself as "the chubby little girl" on the show who now wears "a $300 shmata". She recalls auditioning for her first episode: I just turned 13 – freshly bat mitzvahed. She insists "I like my body. I'm 44. . . I like living Southern California beachy". She argues with the fashionistas as they pretty much throw out all her clothes: "This is hard for me you guys. I live in these clothes . . .I have to let my style reflect the work I've done on the inside." (Therapy?) The fashionistas insist her clothes should let her confidence in her body shine. There's tussles over her saying their rules but violating them – partly because she hates wasting money. But she comes around: "I didn't have to compromise on comfort.. . I can look fun and like a girl and still be comfortable. . . I will take the time, honor myself, and make sure my clothes fit. . .To marry my public and private Mindy image.. . I felt very affirming. . . I hadn't realized that when I wasn't working I had let myself go." (12/18/2010)

Grey's Anatomy executive producer Shonda Rimes' proudly touts her refutation of African-American stereotypes in her several, female-centric shows: To The Wall Street Journal's Amy Chozick, on 5/13/2011, she declared about her production company Shondaland: "I get to have a land, that land is called Shonda. In that land, we're not going to have a black, drug-dealing single mother selling crack. Not on one of my shows." Willa Paskin in The New York Times 5/12/2013 lauded: “Rhimes’s shows have been the most diverse on TV. Oprah Winfrey recently praised her in the Time 100, writing, “She gets us — all of us! . . . Everybody gets a seat at Shonda’s table.” But that table only has occasional yet stereotyped Jewish women characters. (The scabrous satire Children’s Hospital, on Cartoon Network’s Adult Swim, pokes fun by having a male Jewish doctor with a yarmulke, but I haven’t seen a Jewish woman on the staff in its current, 3rd season that I’ve seen so far.) "Almost Grown", written by Brian Tanen, played on one of the excruciatingly oldest clichés about Jews seen in TV, about what the bar mitzvah means (let alone of emasculating, overbearing Jewish mothers). A son, "Seth", yells at his mother "Mindy Gruberman" (played by Susan Slome): You promised me after my bar mitzvah I'd be a man so therefore he can have surgery to have his man-breasts removed. She gets upset about him You just can't cut off the parts of your body that you don't like.. . .Your father has the exact same chest as you and nobody calls him a woman. (We do not actually see the father, who probably is a lot heavier than the very skinny son.) When the older surgeons get frustrated because they had already spent considerable time talking the mother into going along with the surgery, they instruct a young hunky resident to get her to change back her mind. The son confides to him about how he gets teased and wants them removed before he goes to high school. When the mother insists on consulting again with the senior doctors, the smug resident "Dr. Alex Karev" (played by Justin Chambers) then really chews her out in front of them, including a condescending female surgeon, repeating the gratuitous and inaccurate reference: He's a dude with breasts and he's headed for high school and there's no reason that he should be subjected to the psychological damage that comes from school yard crap. You want your kid to be man? Let him make his own decisions! The senior doctors approve and sneeringly turn to her: Any other questions?. After the surgery (which did have doctor-caused complications), mom weeps and the senior doctor claims to know what she's feeling and interprets for the son: She was scared and now she's just happy you're OK. The son turns admiringly to the arrogant resident: You're the man. "Dr. Karev": No, you're the man. (updated 5/12/2013)
Private Practice had a somewhat less offensive, at least warmer, portrayal of a Jewish mother later in the season (commentary to come). (5/12/2011)

Brothers & Sisters finally killed off vestiges of a Jewish connection from the first season, like any long-running show. In "Never Say Never" by Veronica Becker and Sarah Kucserka, when "Ida Holden" (seen in young photos of Marion Ross) dies off screen. As the family members recall her only negatively, they awkwardly, and inaccurately, prepare for her Jewish funeral, including her daughter shopping for a headstone and her grandsons arguing about wearing a kippah at the funeral, which is officiated by a rabbi: We weren't religious. . . But she was, so we have to wear them. Granddaughter "Sarah" (played by Rachel Griffiths): You think a big send off is going to change how any of us feel about Ida? Her daughter "Nora" (played by Sally Field) researches online how to write a eulogy, but ends up just weeping: It’s the things she wasn't that breaks my heart. Her son Saul (played by Ron Rifkin), who throws out a Yiddish word early in the episode to establish his Jewish cred, has harbored guilt and resentment for never telling her he was gay because he was sure she'd disapprove, but it turns out she left him a sweet letter implying that she always knew: Nothing she wanted for me happened. I spent all my life alone. I thought I was able to hide my loneliness from her. He toasts her and introduces her posthumously to the love of his life (played by Richard Chamberlain). (4/14/2011)

Upstairs Downstairs (commentary on the German Jewish woman refugee character and her daughter forthcoming) (5/12/2011)

In SyFy's U.S., Boston-set, adaptation of the British Being Human (out on DVD), the Jewish werewolf "George Sands" has become "Josh" (played by Sam Huntington) and he gained a lesbian sister "Emily" (played by Alison Louder), in the first two episodes "There Goes the Neighborhood" parts 1 and 2, by series adapters Jeremy Carver and Anna Fricke. She's is surprised at seeing him at the hospital where he works, and she describes her feelings in a Jewish family context. She: Where did you go? He: You found me. Here we are. She: I wasn't looking for you. Jackie broke her arm. He: She's your new. . . She: Girlfriend, yes. He: And her arm's OK? She. I miss you. He: I miss you too. How is everybody? She: Your family. We've been freaking out for the past two years wondering if you were dead or alive. Whatever's happened how can you not say anything to the people who love you? He: I told you not to worry about me. She: Josh, did you ever think that the one thing not to say to Jewish parents is 'Don't worry'? Please, just tell me what's going on with you. He: You wouldn't understand. She: Try it. He: It's complicated. She: Josh, I'm your sister. I'm genetically inclined to love you unconditionally. But I thought we were also friends. He: I really missed you. But I kinda need you not to tell anyone that you saw me here. She: What would I tell them anyway? This has been the least satisfying reunion ever. He kisses her and leaves, but she hangs around, and after work follows him into his new basement transformation room: He: What are you doing here? She: What are you doing here? Two years of nothing! And you can't even talk to me! He's in a panic: I'll come see you, I promise. I just need to be alone right now. She: I know why you ran away. . .You think I'm an idiot? Everything was ahead of you. Cookie cutter life, just like mom and dad. You panicked, I get it. You're not nearly as mysterious as you think you are. . . Why punish me? You were my best friend. Why shut me out? He doubles over in pain: It's complicated. She: Are you sick? He: You have to go! She slams the door and breaks off the knob. He desperately telephones his vampire friend, who is preoccupied with vampire stuff, and even begs his ghost roomie to help, who can't leave the house: I will kill her! Sister: Let me help you! He: You stay away from me!, and knocks her across the room as he starts to transform.
In Part 2, when his vampire roommate saves her from being locked up with him just before he finishes transforming in painful agony, she confides: I can't believe my sweet brother went mad. Our mother did, too, you know. I bet he didn't tell you that. You wouldn't know it now she's back on the tennis court and book club circuit. The 'incident' has been neatly filed away. Just our little family curse. . .Jackie's waiting for me upstairs. God, what if he never gets to meet Jackie? I really wanted to rub it in his face that I ended up with the shiksa goddess. Telling his roomie I'm really glad I didn't kill my sister, the next day he tries to warn her of the danger, but she persists: Your friend said you had a condition. Hey, are you mad at me? I told you something I hadn't told anyone. Next thing I knew, you were gone. . .It's me, Josh, what is such a secret that you can't tell me? I saw it yesterday, didn't I?. . .We're here, we're talking. What did you say to [his ex-fiancée]? Because if you didn't want to marry her and you didn't want to go to medical school. . . Look, Jackie and I are going home tomorrow. I'm not letting you leave us again. . .Let me help you Josh, please, come with us! They hug, but he demurs: My life's different now. I'm different. I don't want you to know me. You can't help me. Just leave me alone. She shows up in the next episode pressing him to visit his family. (updated 11/18/2011)

On Desperate Housewives, the provocative web site mogul, the maternal and entrepreneurial landlady "Maxine Rosen" (played by Lainie Kazan), is presumably Jewish, what with dropping Yiddish in the "Truly Content" episode, by Matt Berry, when she "kvelled" at the success of the cleaning-in-sexy-lingerie housewife, and the following week's "The Thing That Counts Is What's Inside", by Jason Ganzel, when she exclaimed at the hunky husband: Look at that punim!, and earthily rued that she'd "ride" him if she were younger. (updated 10/17/2010)

The season started off with the usual sexy Jewish women on TV – Israelis. Hung (on HBO, out on DVD), in the second season premiere "Just the Tip", by series creators Colette Burson and Dmitry Lipkin, the specially endowed teacher and part-time male prostitute "Ray" has just finished having recreational sex with his naked neighbor "Yael Koontz" (Alanna Ubach) in his broken house, but she has complaints different from his clients: Ray, I'm too old for this. Ray: We should probably stop. She shakes her head: Stop what? You mean sex? There's no problem with good healthy sex. It makes for a fun vibe in the neighborhood. . .I'm not in the army any more. I'm too old to have sex on the floor. He: You were in the army? She: Yeah, the Israeli army. You've heard of it?. . Get a bed and some carpet. Your floor is giving me scabs. And you call that a skylight? Ever hear of hiring a professional? I don't remember that she even had a name in the first season or was definitely identified as Israeli, so maybe that's why he, too, was surprised. In the next episode, she buys him a new mattress as a gift. Later in the season in "The Middle East is Complicated", by Brett C. Leonard and Kyle Peck, a beautiful Arab client "Samara" is annoyed when he mentions his Israeli neighbor's "Middle Eastern" food, and she goes off about Israel not being middle-eastern and their humus as an example of all they took from us. The Israeli storms into his house complaining about her husband's use of prostitutes (He has this at home, why would he do it?) and gets angry at finding the Arab's humus in his refrigerator: Arabs can't make humus for shit. You want humus? I'll make it for you. . .I can't believe I fucked such an idiot. . .I'm sick and tired of Arabs laying claim to what the fuck isn't theirs. If you're naive and uneducated enough to listen then I have no time for you! Fuck you! And fuck your Arab humus! Fuck! The Arab client keeps asking him about the married Israeli neighbor: What else does she bring?. . .You can't fuck me and then fuck her and play neutral. . .Then choose a side. . .You fucked me. . .Now you've got to take a stand. Whose side are you on? Whose humus is better? Whose humus do you like the most? Interestingly, at no point in these discussions is there a reference to Jews.
So it was that much more perplexing that "The Key To It All" episode of NBC's Undercover, by Phil Klemmer, was set in Tel Aviv yet featured not a single female Mossad agent, let alone a Jewish woman tourist in the hotel that was taken over by Russian threats. (updated 1/4/2011)

The last season of the NY-set Law and Order: Criminal Intent (on USA, then NBC) had a slight twist on the sexy Mossad agent stereotype in "Boots on the Ground", story by Marlane Gomard Meyer and Paul Sackstein, teleplay by Meyer. The male victim is first seen buying sexy lingerie, and answers "both" to the clerk's query if the recipient is "sexy" or "classic". The detectives find that a follow-up call was made to send one to "Rebecca Landon" (played by Iranian-born actress Tala Ashe). The detective identifies her as a sabra (so I'll presume here that she's more than putative Jewish, though that's never cited), who served with an "elite unit" in the army, which I didn't quite catch, but I presume was Sayeret Matkal, not known for its female membership, and that linked her to the chalk left behind at the apartment balcony crime scene, which pointed to an expert in urban in parkour: You could scale a city wall. She also teaches classes in Krav Maga, the self-defense system of the Israeli army. With a shared congee tattoo and hacking friendship with the victim, she had passed negative information on mercenary military contractors that they collected on to Wikileaks in their joint effort to stop "the war mongering bastards". His mother the ex-member of the People's Liberation Brigade would have been thrilled if [her son] was in love with someone like Rebecca. "Rebecca", who was not his intended recipient of the lingerie as it comes out that she's married, admits that the reason she killed him was blackmail: I got a call. . .They told me my 12-year-old cousin had died in a hit and run. Next time [he] called, I did what he asked. She describes the fatal fight: It was him or my family. The detective sympathizes: He put you in a position that no one should have to be in. and turns to the jealous planner: You had an innocent 12 year old girl killed in order to force Rebecca to kill. (5/18/2011)

In the unfunny NBC sitcom 100 Questions episode "Have You Ever Had a One Night Stand", by co-series creator Michelle Nader, "Wayne" (David Walton) walks into his favorite NYC bar during Fashion Week and espies blonde "French-Israeli" (i.e. presumably Jewish) super-model "Arielle Goodman" (played by Beatrice Rosen, known as Béatrice Rosenblatt in her earlier French work) from his rich past: I saw her in Monte Carlo. Prince was doing jello shots off her stomach. I've wanted her ever since. She remembers meeting him there, but warns him: I'm going to make you work for it. . .I want you to woo me, Wayne. The good, old-fashioned way. When he proffers plane tickets for a romantic getaway, she demurs: You still think money is the way to a woman's heart? I wanted something from your heart. . .Figure it out because you have one more shot. His friend "Mike" (Christopher Moynihan) recommends he write a poem – in her native language, which stumps him. I once heard her talk in a wacky language. The friend gets a negative response to his query: Was it pretty? . . .OK, that was Hebrew. They write a love poem together, and do an online translation into some kind of gibberish. "Mike" is at dinner at the bar with "Arielle": I can't believe you are making me do all this because I don't have any money. She clarifies: I'm doing this to get back at you because you hurt me. . .We had plans in Monte Carlo and you didn't show up. I waited nearly 10 minutes. She's impressed he wrote a poem in her "native tongue": Wayne, that's exactly what I wanted to hear! Let's go to my hotel and get in the tub and maybe you can read it to me. But when he takes pity instead on the drunk female friend he had bet about getting a one-night stand that night, "Arielle" is left alone at the bar, where "Mike" finds her: He told me had to take a rain check. He rejected me for a second time. So he tries out the Hebrew poem on her and she grabs him for a passionate kiss. No surprise - "Mike" is played by the series co-creator. This show was so dumb, no wonder I don't watch many network sitcoms even for the sake of monitoring how Jewish women are portrayed. (7/8/2010)

Annie Edison in the 2nd Season of Community (on NBC and re-run on Hulu Plus) As I belatedly catch up with reruns of this season on Comedy Central and in syndication on a local station (where the episodes may be cut to fit more ads), I happened to distractedly watch “Abed’s Uncontrollable Christmas”, written by Dino Stamatopoulos and Dan Harmon, where “Annie Edison” (played by Alison Brie) explained her December Dilemma “minefield” because her mother was Jewish and her father was Episcopalian (not that any of the many fan sites were interested in her full quote). Within the hilarious varieties of animation that the characters are portrayed, “ Britta” (played by Gillian Jacobs) muses that “Abed” imagines her as a wind up ballerina in Winter Wonderland animation: Because you’re fragile and tightly wound., on sale at the NBC Store as the BallerAnnie figurine:
In the finale song, she sings the line: Christmas can even be a Hanukkah thing. That’s what Christmas is for.
Early in the season, in “Messianic Myths and Ancient Peoples”, written by Andrew Guest, “Shirley” is furious that “Abed”, in Messianic mode: Did you just scripture me, Muslim? “Annie” gently reminds her: Jesus was Jewish. “Shirley” retorts: Are you ever going to let that go?
In a satire of “a bottle episode”, “Cooperative Calligraphy” writer Megan Ganz explained (to Adam Frucci in Splitsider, 3/28/2011) how she built it around “Annie”: “As much as I can't really believe that an entire study group would stay in a room to look for a pen, I can believe that if Annie freaked out enough they, because they care about her, would have to deal with that situation before they moved on.” (I doubt that the writer is of the branch of the Ganz family related to me.)
Amidst the religion and fundraising satire, ”The Psychology of Letting Go”, written by Hilary Winston early in the season, the very Christian African-American “Shirley Bennett” (played by comedienne Yvette Nicole Brown): Everybody has some sort of service for the departed -- Eskimos, witch doctors, Jewish people. “Annie” retorts: Oh, cool. We made the list.
In the election satire “Introduction to Political Science”, written by Adam Countee, “Troy” (played by Donald Glover) and “Abed”s (played by Danny Pudi) candidate analysis identifies her ethnicity as “hot”.
“Mixology Certification”, written by Andy Bobrow (first shown 12/2/2010), is quite insightful about “Annie” – though the fan sites mostly ignore this. She’s adjusting to having a fake I.D. to join the study group in a bar to celebrate “Troy”s 21st birthday: I don’t think this girl looks very much like me. “Britta”: Come on, she’s a white brunette. “Annie”: So is Anne Hathaway. . .What's your friend doing with a stack of other people's I.D.s? . . So she's a drifter. A floater. An urchin. Caroline Decker from Corpus Christi, Texas. Texas? Do I need an accent? “Howdy, y'all. I'm Caroline Decker.” I should research Corpus Christi. “Britta”: Annie, relax. “Annie”: I'm not a relaxed person, Britta. I think ahead. I prepare. I don't improvise my life like Caroline Decker, who probably has really bad credit And an unfinished mermaid tattoo. . .If my I. D. says Texas, they'll be suspicious. “Britta”: They're not gonna question your I. D. Because you're a hot girl. “Annie” role plays: Oh, where's that accent from? Corpus Christi, Texas. What are you doin' here in town? Not much, I reckon, just driftin', floatin', spittin' in the wind, general waywardness. All righty. “Britta”: Annie, you're in the bar. You don't have to be from Texas anymore. “Annie”: I don't know how it works. I'm not a barfly, Britta. But she continues her act with the bartender: Actually, I'll have a root beer instead of that water. Y'all are so nice in this town. I'm Caroline. From Corpus Christi. Grew up on a trout farm. Deedly-do. I'm not exactly known for my sound judgment. Back in Corpus Christi, they call me Capricious Caroline. Bartender: What's capricious mean? “Annie”: Probably means I'm too busy livin' life to be learnin' $5 words! . . .I followed that band Phish- spells it with "ph". I just lived in parking lots wherever they played. I don't even like their music. Just did it to see if I could do it. And guess what. I could! Bartender: So what now? “Annie”: I dunno! Even if I planned it, plans just fall off me like chicken crap off an armadilla. Annie's the one that plans things, not me. Annie's my friend. She goes to school here. Thinks she's got it all figured out. She wants to major in healthcare management. What does that even mean? . . I'll tell you what it means. It means a master's degree followed by an internship. She's got the next 15 years of her life all mapped out. All I do now is just follow it or screw it up. Bartender: Another soda? “Annie”: Actually, gimme a screwdriver. I got no place to be. What am I -- Annie? Later, she gets reflective when “Troy” takes her back to her apartment: I pretended to be a different person tonight. . .But I did it because I didn't wanna be me. I did it because I'm not sure who I am. Admit it-we went to school together for four years, and you didn't even know me. “Troy”: Yeah, but I know you now. You're Annie. You like puzzles and little monsters on your pencils and some guy named Mark Ruffalo. You're a fierce competitor and a sore loser. And you expect everybody to be better than who they are. And you expect yourself to be better than everyone. Which is cool. “Annie” grins and hugs him good night.
But amidst the role-playing of “Advanced Dungeons & Dragons”, written by Andrew Guest, “Jeff” still sneers at her as “Annie The Recovering Head Case.” He continues in the same vein in “Competitive Wine Tasting”, written by Emily Cutler. She tries to be supportive of their older classmate: Maybe Pierce finally found his soul mate. “Jeff”: How can you say those things without any trace of irony? She: That's why they call me Irony-Free Annie. He: Mm, trust me, that's not what they call you. The closing joke is a scene from the student production of Fiddlah, Please!, which has male and female black students dancing in a circle to the rap: It’s hard to be Jewish in Russia. . .with an Old Testment beat. (updated 10/18/2014)

Joan and Melissa Rivers in Joan & Melissa: Joan Knows Best? are in effect following-up on Joan's year-in-the-life bio-doc Joan Rivers: A Piece of Work, where she was edited as mentioning being Jewish just once in passing. In the first two episodes of this very staged reality show, such that it borders on fiction, the family ties were the closest inference, and then the show was edited to emphasize their identity more, so they are probably the most prominent Jewish mother/daughter team on TV, and their ratings led WEtv cable channel to renew them for 2012.
In the first episode, Joan confides in her best friend how she never confided in her mother at all, but she expects her daughter to tell her everything. So she was hurt not to know that the boyfriend Jason had moved in. While Joan touchingly says she's moved from NYC/CT to L.A. to make memories with her grandson Cooper, Melissa is not just annoyed that grandma indulged by buying him a surfboard he was supposed to earn with good behavior, but that grandma had also told him to keep it a secret from mommy – which he didn't. Joan neatly tied in promotion with doing a favor to impress him, first getting him a tour of the set of Are You Smarter Than a 5th Grader? that turned into her being a nervous contestant.
Their Jewish identity came out more in "Kiss My Ash", the third episode. It was a bit uncomfortable first when a staff member sitting in on the weekly "family" dinner butted into a discussion of the family "curse" of women who can't cook, with a mention of that old joke about how do Jewish women make dinner, that the Rivers' kind of icily provide the punch line for: "They make reservations." Melissa similarly played on stereotypes when she attempted to bond with her big, muscle-bound, tattooed concierge cooking teacher -- I went to Penn, you're from South Philly.. He commiserates that his 80-year-old mother lives with him and still treats him like a child. She clucks: The Jews and the Italians. Joan spends the episode both seriously and amusingly disposing of the ashes of a long-time family friend, but gets particularly choked up at the end. She explains to the camera that Jewish custom is to light candles on the anniversary of a person's death, but because she misses her friend so much, she wants to be comforted by lighting a memorial candle for him now. She cries while providing an emotional teaching moment to her family: You have to mourn as you want. Don't listen to other people. Melissa sensitively suggests she say good night to her grandson: New life always cheers you up. (More commentary on subsequent episodes coming.) (updated 3/2/2011)
Joan also guested on the “Joan” episode of Louis (on FX) (commentary forthcoming). She later gave him advice: “I can't stress this enough, always be good to older Jewish comediennes who were nice to you when you were starting out and had your head so far up your own ass that you had to clean out your ears just to see. You're welcome. Now, who do I see about my check?”

In MTV's American version of Skins, the British gay boy "Maxxie Oliver" has become the ethnic gay girl Tea Marvelli (played by Sofia Black-D'Elia). In the second, eponymous, episode, written by the father and son series creator team of Bryan Elsley and Jamie Brittain, she's not yet out to her large, very complicated family. Every room in her house is equally decorated with her mother's symbols of Jews/Israel, and her father's of Catholics/Italians. Though most commenters and fan sites only see her uni-dimensionally in terms of her orientation, in a webisode extra, as is done throughout the episode, she conflates her ethnicity, gender, and sexuality by explaining directly to the camera: I know this girl, she's smart, beautiful, kind, respectful. She loves her family more than anything in the world, and they love her back. She falls in love with someone she's not supposed to, someone she knows her parents would never approve of. And it scares her, because she's afraid to disappoint her family. But sometimes you have to follow what your heart tells you, right, because it's the only unbiased voice in all of us. Happiness in love can't be quantified. And it's not what you make out of it, it's what it makes out of you. Who she loves doesn't change who she is. She's still the same kind, respectful person you know, the person I want to be. It's you mom. You were 16 and you fell in love with dad. We're not that different, are we?
In her self-titled episode, "Tea" invites "Betty" (Blaine Morris), who is still in the closet at school, out dancing at a lesbian club, and they have passionate, Ecstasy pills-fueled sex in her room, waking up entwined. Downstairs together, "Betty" is surprised at the crowded, busy house: How many people live here? "Tea" grins: Just my folks. . .Want to meet 'em? She lays on the double entendres as her father enters: Betty came over. . .She likes to chew things over. Dad is vaguely aware they're on the way to school: Can't be screwing around that late – school matters. Gotta pay attention to that. Amidst the chaos, her senile grandmother (actress not yet ID'd), has a heavy Yiddish accent that implies she's a Holocaust survivor (if she were, say, 16 –like Tea is now--in 1944, that would reasonably make her 80+ today) and is mumbling about past presidents: Nixon didn't know how to. . .No one could take their eyes off Kennedy's smile. . .Tricky Dicky. . on their backs. . . Mom (played by Lori Alter), wearing a chai necklace, recognizes "Betty" and is also pleased that the girls are supposedly studying together: The last time I saw you was at [a] christening! . . .She needs a lot of work because she's very lazy. While Dad first criticizes her brother for his profane phone conversation: Don't use the 'B' word in front of your grandmother!, Mom objects in a whisper to something else he says: You have got to talk to him Marco! We do not use that word here . . .the L word. It upsets Grandma – you know that. And the camera focuses on a bunch of lavender in a vase, a visual reminder that will be repeated. Outside, Dad brags about his daughter to another of her friends, who the family thinks is a lesbian: I got a great kid. She loves her family. She's very open-minded. On the bus to school, "Tea" tells her friends that she's fine with helping out her family by dating a boy, in a way that double plays on both positive and negative ethnic stereotypes of Jews and Italians : No biggie – my dad's friends are kinda important. They're into family and sometimes it's good for my dad if I date someone who knows someone.
After school, "Tea" seems to be trying to speak up to come out at a very noisy family dinner: Mom, if I could say just one thing- for Chrissakes!, but her blonde sister "Maria" (actress not yet ID'd) captures their parents' attention by going into early labor with her third kid. (Dad later shrugs about having to support her kids too: The guy ran out.) Oblivious Grandma just keeps mumbling about past presidents: Clinton could get out of trouble like you could get a pageant queen out of her underwear. . . What's the difference, in Arkansas it's a skill --mazel tov! And she toasts him. Later, "Tea" masturbates in her bedroom to a poster of Audrey Hepburn (who also suffered under the Nazis as a teen during WWII). Her addled grandma walks into her room mistakenly, watches her, gets into her bed, and confuses her with her mother: I don't want you marrying that man. . .Italians! All they want to do is get laid. He'll never leave you alone. . . "Tea" confides about her angst that most commenters seem to only interpret about her sexual orientation, but I think is also related to her ethnic identity: Something's wrong with me, Nana. I want the sex. The girls I sleep with bore me. They're catty, clingy, I don't know. It never feels enough. Is it too much to ask for someone to be interesting? I just want to feel equal. Too much? But Nana is snoring away.
"Tea" justifies her dad setting her up on a date to the guy "Tony" (whose girlfriend is their mutual friend): He has family stuff he has to take care of every once in awhile. . . My dad threw his life away to be with my mom. He didn't care that his family wanted to disown him. Maybe he never wanted that world. He loves her. I can't imagine feeling that way about anyone. Maybe I have a screw missing. Which "Tony" (and most commenters) interpret as a sexual challenge: Maybe it just needs tightening . . You're mysterious. Nobody gets in. . .You think you have it all don't you. But I can match you. You met your match.. I took this as also about her broader frustration growing up within a confused identity and yearning for other kinds of equality. Significantly, she takes him dancing to Marlena Shaw's "Let's Wade in the Water" (available on several compilations of British "Northern Soul" music), which updates a gospel song to conflate Biblical Jewish liberation with sexy, "rescue me" funk. "Tony" thinks that means she wants to screw, but she just ends up laughing at his efforts. The young actor who plays him (James Newman) explained in a 1/25/2011 MTV News interview: "They're kind of brought together by this attraction, and I don't think it's necessarily a sexual attraction. . .I think it's a situation where you have these two people who are very bored, with no one in their lives that really gets them, and on that level, it's like a perfect attraction. . .But on another level, it's a disaster because Tea's a lesbian. It's not a situation where it's like she's a lesbian and then she finds a guy and is like, 'I'm not a lesbian anymore.' She really is a lesbian, and so for her it doesn't work, and for Tony, that in and of itself tortures him."
Coming home, she's confronted by a vengeful drug dealer looking for their friend who owes him money. He responds to her sneers: You're a funny little dyke., but her Dad sees them, and he skulks way. She goes into her grandmother's room (filled with Christian and Jewish decorations) and asks to sleep with her. Grandma asks if she's scared, and that gets her free associating about history again, but specifically within a Jewish context. Unlike most other commenters, I interpret her references as, first, linking Nazi persecution of both Jews and homosexuals, then, with how the Allies, under General Dwight D. Eisenhower, 1st Supreme Allied Commander Europe, didn't try to stop the crematoria, including the decision not to bomb the trains to Auschwitz, where prisoners wore forced to wear color-coded badges by their crimes of identity. While taking artistic license with the blending of pink/purple/lavender, her grandmother sees a continuity of persecution from the Nazis to the so-called Lavender Scare, blaming a man who wouldn't protect Jews within the hot war as one who also wouldn't protect gays within the Cold War, who were both branded in hysterical media propaganda as Communist threats by Nazis and McCarthyites alike:
President Eisenhower let me down. Some kind of war hero. He can kiss my ass. . . I told her, 'This is a free country; no one can hurt you now. We got no ghettos here, Marta.' Eisenhower should have helped us. He should have put a stop to it — but it was on the radio every day. I guess they thought between us and the Communists we were going to tear the place down. They even gave us a name, so every body knew what to hate — 'lavender'. I told her, 'It's a sweet flower; how can a flower hurt anyone?' But people visited. They said that wasn't the way Jewish people behaved. And Marta got so scared that they knew we loved each other. I heard she married a farmer in Wisconsin. Everybody's most particular there. Shame on you, Mr. President! Shame on you! She weeps, and "Tea" does, too: I love you, Nana. Grandma: I know you do, Ruthie.
The next morning, "Tea"s sexual and ethnic identities are again conflated to the audience. Dad calls her outside:: I wanted to ask you something. Is this the guy that called you that name?. . . He called you a kike didn't he? "Tea": Actually, Dad, he called me a. . . He turns back to the creep: That' s not going to fly my friend. Kike, that's an epithet, right there. . . See, this is my daughter and she's precious to me. She's not available to have names put on her, scumbag. She objects. Dad: You're a good person, you should be proud of that, kid. Tea: I love you Dad. And Dad's thuggish associates beat the guy up while discussing how to best run him out of town. "Betty" follows up a kiss in front of the other kids at school with a text, amidst "Tony"'s call: I matched you. I matched you good.. But as a strong, independent young woman who feels nobody does match up to her, she blows them both off for a "wade in the water" dance of liberation, like a contemporary Miriam celebrating across the Red Sea.
[Preliminary summary to be expanded., as I may have missed an episode, so I may wait for the DVD.] During the season, "Tony"s continuing infatuation for "Tea" disrupts the circle of friends, and costs him his girlfriend and earned "Tea" continuing sarcasm from "Betty". In the season finale, "Eura/Everyone" written by Derek Harvie, "Tea" resolves her orientation, at least to her satisfaction. She waits for "Betty", who brushes her off, and calls Tony, with long silences: I just wanted to say I'm sorry. For making you want me. I liked it. I liked that you wanted me. Tony: I love you Tea. She I know. I'm sorry for doing that. She visits "Betty" in the hospital, who is high on pre-op drugs to get her ankle repaired. "Tea" teases how the meds will affect her: Will you forget I hate you? "Betty", woozily: You hate me when you're around boys. What do they have that I don't have? All right, all right. And you totally don't give a shit because you're just a bitch. "Tea": Your wrong Bets, I try. "Betty: Sure you do. I want you here. and invites her into her bed. "Tea" has to go off to help her friends, and she and "Tony" instinctively hold hands at a dance club. But she ends up at "Betty"s room, who is post-surgery unconscious. "Tea" strips, gets into the end of her bed, and falls asleep with a smile. "Tony"s younger sister later says of her: The boygirl. [Tony] loves her as well.
Though after her own episode, the series only seemed to reference her confused sexual identity, at least with "Tony", not her ethnicity, so I don't know if the show's creator was only referring to that aspect in his responses to this hostile interview with AfterEllen: "Skins boss Bryan Elsley talks Tea, Tony and Naomily", posted by Heather Hogan, Assistant Editor on 2/18/2011- "AE: Can you talk a little bit about your process for developing Tea? I know you talked to young lesbian women as she began to take shape. BE: Like lots of the characters in Skins, Tea is based on a person in my life, someone I have known for a little while. She has given me an insight into some of her experiences. And there's a very direct correlation between her and Tea. And, of course, Tea was developed in the teen group, both here and in the UK. . . .AE: Fan criticism aside, do you think you accomplished what you set out to accomplish when you started writing Tea? BE: Yes, I do. I mean, the creation of Tea came out of my friendship with a lesbian who I like and respect and think is an interesting person, and my feeling about Sofia Black-D'elia, who I met and think is a tremendous actress. And, of course, from my teen group and writers room." (updated 3/26/2011)

Being Erica – Erica Strange in the 3rd season (Canadian series, shown in U.S. on Soapnet, streaming on Hulu) (commentary forthcoming) (7/1/2012)

Lisa Cuddy on House, M.D. in the 7th season, and in what turned out to be her last. Now that "Dr. House" and "Dr. Cuddy" are boyfriend and girlfriend, I anticipate we will see her personal side more, including her Jewish identity, and I'll only comment on those references. In the season's third episode, "Unwritten", by John C. Kelley, they are double-dating with his best friend "Dr. Wilson", who has never been particularly credible as a Jew. Regardless, in a go-kart race "Wilson" is side-swiped by his aggressive girlfriend. "Dr. Cuddy": What is her problem? "Dr. House": She hates Jews! Gritting her teeth, "Dr. Cuddy" puts her pedal to the metal, exclaiming: Never... again.
In "Small Sacrifices" by David Hoselton, an episode that tested "Dr. House"s thesis of "Everybody lies" within relationships with Jewish women, we learned a bit more about "Dr. Cuddy": she lied to the Dept. of Human Resources to get her first management job at 29, adding two years to her age to make her look more responsible, and she has a six-day marriage in her past. Meanwhile, we still learn very little about the putatively Jewish "Rachel Taub" (played by Jennifer Crystal Foley), but she's gotten friendly with a guy in an online support group for cheated-on spouses. She explains to her very jealous husband "Dr. Taub" who checked her e-mails: I tell him things I can't tell you. He: Not things about me, about you, about your new job, about coloring your hair, about how you felt when your mother died. I want to know those things! She: He's easier to talk to. He's open and honest. He makes me feel safe. He: Sounds like you love him. She: I'm not having an affair. He lives in Oregon. I've never met him. I probably never will. He: You're having an emotional one. She: Are you equating what I'm doing with what you did? He: I've done terrible things to you, and I deserve all this now, but you can't pretend what you're doing isn't hurtful. And she storms off, but he follows with an apology. ("House" does the same to "Dr. Cuddy", but they are both, in fact, lying as they do so.) She: You think I'm being selfish and I'm not. He makes me feel better about me and about us. He: That is hard to believe, because all I feel right now is betrayed. She: I never wanted that. He: Good, because just like you asked me to stop my behavior, I'm asking you to stop this. She shakes her head and responds like "Dr. Cuddy": I'm not going to lie to you. He: Is this revenge? She: I don't know, but I do know that it's something I need right now. He walks away and confides in his colleagues: It's not over. I just really miscalculated. I thought she'd forgive me for everything, but all those hurt feelings they just don't really want to go away.
In "Larger Than Life", by Sara Hess, there seemed to be some kind of ironic parallels being made again between Jewish women characters at the opposite ends of relationships, though there's still no references as to whether "Mrs. Taub" is Jewish. The "Taubs" are hot and heavy with sex, with her initiating it morning, noon and night. She claims it's a release from fighting for weeks with my sister whether to put Dad in that facility, but he's more and more convinced that she's really hankering for her online friend "Philip" who she's confided in, even as she insists she's never met him. "Dr. Taub" contemplates their 22-year marriage and his infidelities: I don't know how not not to be with her. to his young student, who calls him selfish. Even as the Taubs keep saying they love each other, he finally confronts her: It's my fault. . .Are you happy? She admits she's not, and he asks for divorce.
"Cuddy" tells "House" to come to her birthday dinner with her mom and warns: She's a handful. Guest star Candice Bergen is "House"s clinic patient, "Arlene": I wish that you would take a second look. I'm tired all the time, and when it's cold I get this weird pain in my shoulder.. . .How do doctors get this idea you're better than everyone else?. . .My own daughter is a doctor. She makes a hobby of dismissing my concerns. He: She sounds smart. "Arlene": Did she tell you to say that? He: I've never met your daughter. "Arlene": That's hard to believe, since you're currently shtupping her. He confronts "Cuddy": I have been going out of my way for months now to avoid old Jewish ladies on the off chance one of them could be your mom – and she's a shiksa? "Cuddy" justifies the casting joke: She converted when she married my dad. . .She's the one who ambushed you to find out what you were like because 'I never tell her anything'. He: I obviously can't come to dinner now. She's crazy and she hates me! "Cuddy": Obviously? I need you to come to that dinner. For two hours keep your mouth shut, and behave like an adult. Yes, you will be in hell, but I will feel better having you there. That is what a relationship is. We average our misery. The dinner starts with Mom criticizing how "Cuddy" is catering to her toddler daughter: When you and your sister were growing up, you ate what we ate, no excuses. . . She was a little vilda haya in the park today. Must have been all that sugar. "Wilson" tries to point out the research that counters that myth. Mom shuts him down: I'm sure it's very interesting. I didn't read any studies – I just raised children. Turning to "Cuddy": It's not your fault. How are you supposed to keep up with what she ate? You work all day, you're never home. Then she turns to "House": So, say you two got married? Would you convert to Judaism? "Cuddy" tartly interrupts: We haven't got that far, Mom. "Wilson": That's actually a really interesting question. "House": I'm an atheist. Mom: Honey, half the Jews I know are atheists. It's about community. "Cuddy": House is not big on community. Mom: Why; do you call him House? It makes it sound like you're not serious. His name is Gregory. I'm just trying to help you think about the future. You're a certain age now. The parade of boyfriends can't be as amusing as it was. You need to settle down, like your sister. . . I just don't want Rachel growing up thinking you're a slut. "House" starts telling her off, but Mom freezes – he sneaked a sedative into her drink. "Wilson": I'm relieved. Your mom is quite a handful., but "House" knocked him out too. The next morning "House" warns his staff that Cuddy's mom is in my office and she is really mad. She has settled in, reading his files and sticking her feet up on his desk, and speaks up first: I think we both know I owe you an apology. . .I know I can be a bit difficult. . . In the clinic, you were a complete schmendrick. But once you knew I was Lisa's mother, you held your tongue. That's because you love her. I still think you're a pain in the ass with a God complex, and I'll kill you if you hurt her. But I'm glad she has you. He: We don't have to hug now, do we do? Mom: What do you think? I have a train to catch. . .I'm coming down with a cold. Every time I stay with Lisa or her sister one of those rugrats gets me sick. Children are awful! He reflects on her to "Cuddy": You know, you turned out remarkably normal considering the genes in play. She: Thanks. He hands her a birthday present of a sedatives bottle for when her mom visits again. She: You are a sweet, sweet man.
In a TV Guide interview with William Keck, 12/13/2010, "Candice Bergen Visits House", she described her character as "'a gentile who would prefer to be a Jew. She considers House a goy unable to commit to her daughter.. . .[Cuddy's sister Lucinda] is the good daughter.' . . .Adds exec producer David Shore, 'Arlene's a tough-as-nails woman who's very hard on Cuddy. They love each other, but boy, do they drive each other crazy.'" (More commentary on additional episodes with the mother forthcoming.)
Their relationship was further explored in "Family Practice", albeit with only the briefest Jewish context when the mother calls "House" "that goyishe doctor". (description forthcoming)
In "Fall From Grace", by John C. Kelley, "House"s best friend, the Jewish "Dr. Wilson" makes a veiled Jewish reference when he argues with "Dr. Cuddy" about how she should handle "House" after their break-up: Appeasement is never the answer in the face of naked aggression. It won't be long before his tanks are rolling down your Champs-Élysées.
In "The Fix", story by Thomas L.Moran, teleplay by Moran and David Shore, "Dr. Cuddy" made an unusually explicit Jewish reference. When "House"s African-American #2 warns her about his latest hijinks, she sarcastically remarks: Ma nishtana. . .All those years of medical school and you never went to a seder?. . It's 'Why is this night different from any other night'? And she walks away from him. (updated 5/9/2011)

Ziva David on NCIS in her 6th season (The 8th season on CBS, out on DVD.) Her co-workers' light sexual banter with her continues to be a factor in why the series has become a strongly reliable hit, even as the writers grapple with "Ziva"s changed status into a U.S. citizen. But to continue to see her as sexy, they usually present her more as an Israeli than as a Jewish American woman. In the season opener "The Spider and the Fly", by Gary Glasberg, her colleague "Tony" is curious about e-mails she is getting from a guy she may have been with when on assignment in Florida, but in her usual befuddlement over American pop culture and slang, she doesn't get his references to "looking balmy": I do not know where you are looking. I do not have tan lines., insisting she was lying in the sun just before I came, and came up with thoughts about the case. His curiosity about "the guy from South Beach" persisted in "Royals and Loyals", written by Reed Steiner, as she insists: He's just a friend. But she very uncharacteristically giggled while reading her e-mail, piquing "Tony" even more: Señor South Beach? I'm glad there's someone out there who makes you smile. I'd like to meet him. She's amused: If and when you meet my friend, and I emphasize if, what will you say? He chuckles: "Be careful. Handle with care. Contents -- priceless." He went on to tease her about the British agent she was assigned to liaise with, though, as usual, she didn't get his movie reference to Bond: I'm not into bondage. I can assure you. But he insists the Brit will perceive her as sexually as he does: I'm just watching the pheromones oozing from your body. She protests: I don't see anything He persists: That's because they are invisible. It's just a musky scent given off to attract the opposite sex. She keeps objecting: You're being ridiculous. He combines pop culture references with his perceptions of her: It's true. First your 'Miami Vice', and now your 'Prince Albert In A Can'. Oh, they can't help it – you're just a walking Israeli love machine. Her boss drops a more serious reference to her origins when he revises his instruction to her about the British agent: Watch him like Syria, not Switzerland. In "Worst Nightmare", by Steven D. Binder, she is the only one not surprised by a young woman suspect's affair: I find older men, well, attractive.

"Dead Air", by Christopher J. Waild, reverted her to Israeli to keep her sexy, and treated her as an immigrant with Daddy issues. In this October episode about suburban domestic terrorists, it opened and closed with paeans to baseball. "Tony" rhapsodizes about World Series season: Baseball has seeped into the native consciousness in this country. She frowns: I do not feel seepy. "McGee" is a bit condescending: Maybe you just have to be born here. She shrugs: It's just a game. "Tony" goes on about Field of Dreams: It speaks to the immigrant experience. She is still bemused: I did not become an American citizen because of baseball. As "Tony" goes on, she interrupts him before the case interrupts them: You know, baseball is actually very popular in Israel. They even started their own-- She is confused when they describe a private gated community as representing the American Dream: A picket fence would provide neither security nor privacy.
They send her in undercover with her old Mossad identity to take over contact with the isolationist vigilantes: I'm afraid [bomb supplier] is out of business. In his line of work, competition can be a killer. . . .I'm Ziva David – the competition. Her colleagues follow her progress through binoculars. "Tony": How is Miss America doing? Who's she supposed to be again anyway? "McGee": She's playing herself. From five years ago. Before she started at NCIS. "Tony": Sassy rogue Mossad agent. Sometimes I miss that little minx. "McGee": It's only temporary, until we find what our suburban terrorists are planning. "Tony" is critical: She's not doing a very good job. Her body language is all wrong. Classic 'Ziva' would have been more reckless. Her hair would have been more wild. She was very sexual then. "McGee": You think Ziva's less sexual now? "Tony": Compared to the Ziva I shared a bed with five years ago, yeah. "McGee": But you guys were undercover. You were just putting on a show. You were just putting on a show, right? "Tony" just clears his throat.
Meanwhile, she is cannily doing her job in a way that plays on an intriguing blend of political shibboleths. She explains to the suspect that the bomb maker's line of work made him an enemy of Israel. Getting rid of him was for country. Doing business with you—now that's for money. I believe I have something that you need. The amateur terrorist is intrigued: A Mossad profiteer working on American soil? Where exactly do your allegiances lie? She: That does not matter. It is not my job to police America. I have other customers. [Bomb maker] had a thriving business. Good luck. Back at the office preparing for another meet, she nostalgically takes out her old set of knives, as "Tony" teases her about "a complete relapse". She's surprised: You did not like me then? At the next meet, her contact comments approvingly: I see you have quite the famous father. She: I see you did your check-up on me. Let's get down to business. She dismisses the other guy's work and demands more money. So he introduces her to the rest of his merry band of conspirators at a backyard BBQ. They explain their motivations by expressing their admiration for Israel (in a secular context, but sounding similar to the evangelicals in Waiting For Armageddon): In a way, you're fortunate. When Israel spends money on its military, it's usually to protect itself. We send money half-way around the world. She parries: You're not fighting a war on your own soil. The others protest (and I didn't get down their whole litany of complaints, which oddly sounded more like liberals than conservatives): Oh, but we are! Crime. . .illiteracy. . .The only threats our government takes seriously are the violent ones. . .Some of us here have decided to become a threat ourselves.
Later, she speaks very personally to the conspirator's daughter: Fathers, they sometimes make mistakes. Mistakes that require a lot of forgiving. Protecting "Tony" from the exploding bomb, she tackles him, ending up on top. He: This is nice. I miss the old Ziva. She smiles: I can tell. He: Don't flatter yourself. That's just my knee. She is surprised how dedicated the bomber was to coach a baseball team. "Tony": You'll understand eventually. She: Will I? She goes to the baseball diamond and picks up a ball and mitt. She calls out: Hey 'Gibbs' – have a catch? "McGee" is surprised at her skill: So you do know a little something about baseball. She grins: Yeah, my father taught me. As her new father-figure, "Gibbs" grins and throws her the ball – a la Field of Dreams.

"Broken Arrow", by Frank Cardea and George Schenck, continued to use "Ziva"s antecedents, even as it opens with her being thrilled to receive My United States of America passport! Her boss explains why he selected her for an assignment at a Turkish embassy function over "Tony": I'm sending another agent who speaks several languages and looks better in a dress. A higher-up is put off by just how good she looks: Does Agent David carry a weapon? "Gibbs" assures him: She is a weapon. She is charmed by "Tony"s con man father, who asks his son: What is your current relationship with her? "Tony": Ziva? We're co-workers. We don't have a relationship. It's strictly business. Dad: Then you won't mind if I make my move , if the opportunity presents itself. But even though she is undercover as his arm candy "Sophia", a notorious Turkish arms dealer recognizes her as "Ziva", daughter of "Eli", who is now working for the U.S., but she is able to put him out.
Two-part Sweeps Week episodes dealt specifically with her changing identity and relationship with her father. (I seem to have not gotten around to transcribing a key background episode from last season, October 2009's "Good Cop, Bad Cop" by Steven D. Binder, where some of these characters also appeared as "Ziva" dealt with the repercussions of barely surviving the mission her father sent her on.) In "Enemies Foreign", by Jesse Stern, she draws guns on two terrorist suspects, but when the man and woman speak Hebrew to each other, she recognizes them as Mossad agents. As "Tony" says sardonically: Oh good, the Israelis are back. The lithe, blonde (i.e. not stereotypically Israeli for TV) female officer (played by the Israeli actress Sarai Givaty) introduces herself: Liat Tuvia. In Hebrew Liat mean you are the one for me, Tony. "Ziva" sneers: In Israel, it is one of the most common names. "Liat" sneers back: Only grandmothers are named Ziva. "Liat" also stumbles over American idioms with him: You are very tongue and ear. "Ziva" corrects: She means tongue in cheek. But "Tony" is eyeing "Liat": Don't put words in the girl's mouth!. Her colleague "McGee" also appraises her: Clearly this is the new Ziva, your replacement in the Mossad. "Ziva" seethes. The very handsome officer "Malachi Ben-Gidon" (played again by T.J. Ramini, a Brit whose father was Palestinian) is amused: Did you think we would not move on after you left us? She turns on him: You left me! "Tony" plays peacemaker: Let's not get hung up on who left, right or wrong.
Back at headquarters, she takes "Liat" to the ladies' room (throughout the episode these Israelis speak English to each other): Outsiders are not allowed unaccompanied in this building. "Liat" again sneers: Congratulations on becoming American. You must be very proud. "Ziva": I am. "Liat": And your family? How do they feel? "Ziva": Y'know, you were personally selected by my father to fill a vacancy in his roster, not his bloodline. And trust me, the second part is not something you want to covet. She recites "Liat"s resume and compares them competitively. "Liat": But I'm not done. Benefit of youth. See, I would expect you to look into past content. But you seem to only care about my abilities with a gun. "Ziva": You have a pet cat named Bill. I happen to like cats. "Liat": Still, I feel this measuring contest would be more at home in the men's room, don't you? Back in the interrogation area, "Malachi" announces that her father is coming to a conference in a couple of days. "Ziva" is aghast: You're lying! My father has not left Israeli soil in 12 years! "Liat" retorts: We're not lying!
"Gibbs" meets with her dad (again played by Michael Nouri), who muses over the late intelligence director who was responsible for bringing our two organizations together. And for bringing my daughter into your life. I'm not here for her. "Gibbs", who has been her replacement father-figure: For Ziva. She has a name. "Eli David": I'm aware. I gave it to her.. . ."Gibbs": You didn't have to make the trip. Meanwhile, "Ziva" and "Liat" find they share a philosophy, doubtless from their training. "Ziva": It is not about the size of the gun. and "Liat" finishes her thought: It is about the will of the shooter. The director asks "Gibbs": How's our own David handling it? "Gibbs": Her father left her to die in a desert. Director: So it's a problem. "Gibbs": Would be for me. Won't be for Ziva.
When "Ziva" and "Liat" prepare security precautions to protect "Eli" from those trying to kill him, "Tony" watches them: Trained killers looking for killers. "Tony" grills "Malachi" about "Liat": Are you her first? Partner, I mean. "Malachi": She is young. What she lacks in experience, she makes up with a passion like I have never seen. "Tony": Am I sensing something between the two of you? "Malachi" smiles: Nothing serious. "Tony": So the two of you haven't slept together yet? "Malachi": Of course we are sleeping together. Just it's nothing serious yet. "Tony": I have to get back to Israel. "Malachi" grins: Next year in Jerusalem, my friend.
"Ziva" and "Liat" talk while on patrol. "Ziva": Given my father's many enemies, we would have been better served with advance notice. "Liat": Do you include yourself? Among his enemies? I wonder if protecting him from assassination is an appropriate assignment for you? "Ziva": Let us find out., and she plays her father in a mock test of their security plans. "Gibbs" bemusedly calls her "Director David" for the test, but she corrects I would imagine he would move more slowly. "Liat" shows up the inadequacies in their plans: A three man team is one thing, but we shouldn't be so naïve as to assume that means only three guns. I'm 'dead' now, but so are you. "Tony" teases "Ziva" about "Liat" besting her, using his usual movie comparisons: I've seen it a million times. The pretty popular girl gets all jealous when the hot new transfer moves in and steals all the spotlight. She's so disconcerted that she reverts to misunderstanding an idiom when "McGee" explains how he's "hung a net" to track down the terrorists. "Ziva": I do not know who Annette is, or why you are so proud of killing her.
The lab tekkie "Abby", who "Ziva" has uncharacteristically been attempting to bond with in earlier episodes, pulls her aside: You should see your Dad. "Ziva": How would that help the case? "Abbie": It wouldn't. Have you even spoken to him? "Ziva" : No. . .What does it matter to you? "Abby": Do you think it's just by chance that he came back into your life? I mean, what about Gibbs and his father, and Tony? Just there comes a point, you know, in your lifetime where - where they come back into your life. Because - because they matter to you, and you matter to him. I suppose that sounds complicated, but believe me, it's not nearly as complicated as knowing they're never ever coming back again. Meanwhile, her father is digging it to "Gibbs": You have a way of making my family disappear. And "McGee" is admiring him: I got to hand it to your father, Ziva. He has who knows how many guns trained on him right now, and he is completely oblivious. "Ziva": No, he's aware. He is always aware of what he does. Not caring about the consequences is what makes him who he is. "Ziva" and "Liat" then very effectively team up to bring down two of the terrorists. "Ziva": You did good. "Liat": So did you.
The captured Palestinian terrorist "Karif Yasin" (played by Israeli actor Oren Dayan) gives a passionate, and not unreasonable, rant against what the Mossad chief has done to his people: Eli David will be eliminated. . .It's war. . .You do not know who he is.. . .He will be lying dead on the street. "Gibbs" concurs, to a point: Yeah, he's a son of a bitch. But I'm not going to let you murder him on American soil. "Ziva" is waiting at the car to take her father to the conference with the NCIS director. Dad: I understand you volunteered for this detail. "Ziva": Yes, to protect my director. Dad: OK, let's go. "Ziva" gets unusually emotional: That's all you're going to say to me? Dad: What is the point? I know that face. You made the same face when I told my brother he could not buy you a pony. Ziva if you want to talk. We will talk. I'm not going to beg. "Ziva": Why not? You know, confronted with the prospect of your own death, another man would want to talk. Dad interrupts: A lesser man! "Ziva" slams the car door: A human man! Dad: Ziva, you are not dead. You are living your life, making your choices. If you choose to let me be part of your life, I would welcome that with open arms. I am saddled with responsibilities that you cannot possibly fathom. The safety of our nation. And every one of our neighbors wants us dead. I don't have the luxury of allowing my feelings to dictate my actions. "Ziva": You do not have any feelings! Dad: I have no feelings?... There was a time, Ziva. When I was quite different. When my house was filled with the sound of children laughing. You and Ari and Tali. There was a time, Ziva. Yes. His guard confides in her: His heart is hidden for a reason. She drives the car fast to avoid an attack. Her director to her dad: Most fathers teach their daughters to drive. I blame you for this. Dad: This she learned from her mother. When the guard lies dead, the fate of her father is left in a cliffhanger for the end of sweeps week.
In the concluding episode "Enemies Domestic" by Jesse Stern, "Liat" is furious about the attack: Someone is going to pay for this!. . .You know, our safe house in Tel Aviv is a concrete bunker - 100 feet below ground. "Ziva" retorts: Meaning this would never have happened there? Because there's no violence in Israel?. . .Are you blaming me? "Tony" and "Malachi" try to get them to focus on the evidence, as they find "Eli David"s blood. "Liat": Why do you assume he was kidnapped? "Ziva": Because it's the only option where my father is still alive. The two women continue to glare at each other. "Liat": He was walking. . .He made a tourniquet to take care of his wounds. He was not abducted. "Ziva": No he fled the scene. "Liat": No, he eluded his attacker. "Malachi" interrupts: He left us a trail to follow. "Liat" finds a message in Hebrew in the dirt, and rubs some of it out. "Malachi" identifies the message as knesset, the Hebrew word for "house or home". But "Ziva" guesses what the original message was, and she explains the Golem to "Tony", who mixes it up with "Gollum" from Lord of the Rings: Golem is a supernatural being from Jewish folklore. He was created from mud to protect the Jews. The mystics etched the word 'emet" into his forehead. When the task was completed the letter 'aleph' was scratched out, changing the word to 'met'. Do you understand what I'm saying?. . . Liat is an overachiever – she erased the entire word. "Ziva" explained to "Liat" how she figured out to go to the nearest synagogue (a really big, decorated one). [Rachel Gostl gave me the clearest and most succinct explanation: "The words that had been written were 'Bet Knesset'; the Mossad agent erased 'Knesset' to change the meaning of the message. "Ziva" told the story of the golem to illustrate how removing a small part can change the entire meaning. When you erase the aleph in 'emet', you get 'met' which means death, sort of the complete opposite of 'emet'."]: But just one question: why did you not trust me? "Liat": You're not with us. "Ziva" yells: Abba! Show yourself! "Liat" protests: Are you an idiot? "Ziva" makes an odd reference to the Passover game: We're not looking for the afikoman! He can hear us if we call him. "Liat": Yes, but you don't know who else might hear. But "Ziva" yells again: Abba! The two women take off their jackets and get into a serious fight – until "Eli" appears: Stop it! What are you doing? "Ziva": He's coming with me Malachi. "Liat": He's not going anywhere. "Eli": Liat, you do not answer for me. "Ziva" tells him his guard is dead and "Director Vance" nearly so. Everyone has questions for you. "Eli": Take me to NCIS. You will have your answers. "Ziva" is skeptical about his explanation: And maybe my father is lying. That is what he does. "Liat" is more sympathetic, and more than a bit flirtatious: When your whole country could be wiped away any day, you don't take tomorrow for granted. "Tony": That's terrifying. "Liat": It was meant to be comforting. The techie "Abby" cites why "Eli" is the probable suspect: He knew how to do it. He just confessed to knowing how to build the murder weapon. I mean, how many people know how to build a homemade claymore mine? "Malachi": In this room? He, "Liat" and "Ziva" join her in raising their hands.
There's flashback sequences to when the NCIS director "Vance" first met her father, on a 1991 assignment in Amsterdam. "Vance": So what wakes an Israeli up in the morning? "Eli": My wife. Though not for several months. "Vance" gets a background briefing on "Eli": We called him 'Mogen David – the star of David'. He rocketed up the ranks of the Mossad. The report says he's involuntarily inactive. He went off the deep end after his wife ditched him for someone else. "Eli" asks "Vance": Who will cry for you if this will accidentally blow-up, turning us into smears on the wall. "Vance": Who'll cry for you? "Eli": I have children. "Vance": Why would you lure a hit team here? "Eli": Because Mossad told me I could kill them. The Russian turned an Israeli sailor. Bled him dry for information, then sent a hit team to dispose of my fellow countrymen. My wife could no longer live with what I do. She took my family, my children, to ensure that they do not grow up to be like their father. This I cannot fight. I need a target. "Vance" later asks: What's your daughter's name? "Eli": I have two – Talli and Ziva. At the end, "Eli" puts a small Israeli flag on "Ziva"s desk: There have been times when I felt this job takes a piece of me. I worry they may be gone forever. "Ziva": Sometimes life--surprises you. "Eli" comes closer: Those are the moments worth living for, my Ziva. He kisses her on the forehead, and leaves.
"False Witness", by Steven D. Binder, was in effect the winter holiday episode, and "Gibbs" seemed a bit thick when he asked "Ziva" where she would be having her Christmas turkey. Her answer was not only not a gentle rebuke, but it's what we do on Christmas too: I'm going skiing. . .with my friend from Miami. . He lived in the French Alps for awhile and he says he misses the snow. Her colleagues continue to be curious about her boyfriend in Miami when she asks for extra days off to spend time with him, in "Ships in the Night" by Reed Steiner and Christopher J. Waild: He travels. . . .That's why I'm using comp time to visit him for three days. "Tony", oddly, teases that he's probably Cuban, which she denies. In the follow-up "Recruited", by Gary Glasberg, the colleagues gossip about her days off, even as "Tony" blithely claims: I have better things to do than to obsess over the whereabouts of our "Little Miss Fancy-Pants.. She calmly reveals, with a smile, more about her personal life than usual amidst their teasing: He came to me. We went skiing again, this time to Vermont. . . He enjoys nature, and I discovered that he's a fantastic cook. He made this delicious osso buco. . . He is an experienced man who knows how to appreciate life. . . .His name is Ray. I promise you, Ray is a good man.
In "Freedom" by Nicole Mirante-Matthews, after bemusedly fending off "Tony"s continuing jealousy about "Renaissance Ray", "Ziva" shows uncharacteristic sympathy with a military battered wife she suspects of murdering her marine husband by citing her experience as a tortured prisoner: I know what it's like to be under the control of a man. To feel like you have no power. And the only way to get that power back is to shut down. You tell yourself you must shut down. You tell yourself to never show emotion to anybody. I know what that's like. It's the only way you can survive. I also know what it's like to seek revenge.
At some point I will describe/transcribe her romantic relationship with “CIA Agent Ray Cruz”, which I was slow to do because I’m in a minority, non-PC view compared to other fans. I appreciate actor Enrique Murciano as a hunk, who was a prime reason I used to watch Without A Trace, but I was a bit disappointed with the hints first that her lover was Latino, only because I was hoping she’d keep dating Jewish and/or Israeli men, despite that her earlier such boyfriends kept getting killed off. (updated 1/26/2012)

Rachel Berry in the 2nd season of Glee (on Fox, Season 2 out on DVD) is pilloried with nasty put-downs that are eventually followed by a modicum of sympathy, opening with—"Finn": Rachel is what you'd call a controllist. Rachel: I'm controlling – controllist isn't a word. The second season premiere "Audition", by Ian Brennan, continued in that vein with club members calling her "an ambitious little freak" and her motivations attacked for dirty tricks against a talented new foreign transfer student from the Phillipines (including sending her to a wrong address at a crack house), who she first thought would make a good back-up singer, but she then saw as potentially taking solos from her: You didn't do this because you love Glee Club. You did it because you love yourself more. While her boyfriend defends and protects her, her apology is mostly in singing "What I Did for Love" (from A Chorus Line).
In "Britney/Brittany", written and directed by series creator Ryan Murphy, she's an overly possessive girlfriend now that she's won the former quarterback: I want to be the only thing that makes you feel good about yourself. She expands on that later: The only way this relationship is going to work is if we're both losers., but he assures her he'll let everyone know she's his girlfriend even if he is back playing football. She finally apologizes for her jealousy and they end up walking hand in hand down the hall. To her boyfriend's shock when changes to sexy outfits: I had a very vivid Britney Spears fantasy at the dentist, and since its made be feel free to be out of my own way. I've always been afraid to dress like a pretty girl because I never really felt like one before. Now I realize it's OK to feel like it now and again. Maybe it's a good thing., garnering unusual compliments from Mean Girl "Santana" who goes from accusing her: Hey dork, did anyone ever tell you that you dress like one of the bait girls on To Catch a Predator? to Well, congratulations. Normally you dress like a fantasy of a perverted Japanese businessman with a very dark specific fetish but I actually dig this look. Yeh. Gay "Kurt" is also approving: It seems that Britney has really helped you blossom. But it gets pointedly sneering that the only straight guy who has a positive reaction is the annoying "Jacob Ben Israel" with the big Isro—that "Brittany" calls "a Jewish cloud"-- who is driven to a sweaty, exaggerated sexual frenzy at the mere sight of his crush dressed like that.
Even if this is PR-ese, the parallels between perceptions of the Jewish actress and her character resonate in these interview quotes from Marie Claire, November 2010, around a cover story and series of sensual photos in designer outfits: "My acting teacher and music teachers didn’t really like me and they kind of ignored me. . . I was told by agents and casting directors I wasn't right for TV. I didn't feel that but I was told it and you believe it. I was always working on Broadway and auditioning for TV - things like Law & Order - but there was never anything. . .The minute I read it, I wanted to play Rachel because I felt like I understood her, and that she was part of me. . .Glee has made me feel beautiful. Now when people say that I don't feel like they're lying."
"Grilled Cheesus", by Brad Falchuk, dealt directly with religion, and was somewhat less mocking of "Rachel". Her boyfriend "Finn" finds religion in the Jesus image on his grilled cheese sandwich, and bends his knee to this icon for football success and: Rachel's a prude. . .but they're still girl boobs and I'd like to touch them. . .Please answer my prayers. But when he proudly announces his new faith in Jesus Christ the two Jews in the Glee Club are startled. "Puck": I'm a total Jew for Jesus. He's my number one Heb., but he' doesn't want to be bothered. "Rachel" is so upset that she sits "Finn" down in her room: Let's talk about your new-found love of Jewish and how it affects me. I want this relationshpo to go the distance, but I need to know that when I'm 25 and I've won a bunch of Tony's and I'm ready to have intercourse and babies that those babies will be raised in a certain way.. He mumbled under his breath: You're not going to have sex until you're 25? She: I want my children to be raised in the Jewish faith. Both of my dads' peoples were slaves once. I need to know that my children will be free to workship in the way that I decide is right. He: Sure, of course, yeah, they should totally go to Jew church and wear those hats and eat that salty stuff on their bagels She's grateful: I'd like to give you something in exchange for what you've given me. - second base, and he credits his new icon: Rachel's boobs are really awesome. Later, the club talks about singing spiritual songs on behalf of gay "Kurt" who is facing a personal crisis with his father's serious illness, but they are thwarted by his protests against religion in public school. "Rachel" takes this personally: I found the most perfect song to sing, and now its being torn away from me like Sophie's daughter! "Rachel" takes "Finn" outside so she can sing him her selection because Yentl was outside when she sang this song in the movie. --"Papa, Can You Hear Me?" "Rachel" later joins two other classmates at the hospital to pray for the father, as "Mercedes" explains: Rachel, Quinn and I are taking turns. We're from different denominations. "Rachel" explains to the angry "Kurt": We just wanted to do something.
In the episode "Duets" by Ian Brennan, with the theme of sympathy for people who are different and "special", the series continued its mix of both zapping "Rachel" big time and sympathizing with her a bit, here amidst a singing competition. "Rachel" confesses to her boyfriend: I'm not really a nice person. I'm selfish. I'm only really generous if there's something in it for me. "Finn" cheerfully agrees: Yeah, but I still like you. She: You're so kind and open. It's made me want to be a better person. But because they've together sung a lovely version together of Elton John and Kiki Dee's "Don't Go Breaking My Heart" that they both decide would be bound to win, she explains to him how they can encourage the new guy to stay in the Glee Club so they'll win Nationals: We have to throw the competition. . . . He: Wow, Rachel, I'v never seen you like this. I'm impressed. She: Like I said, You inspired me. He: Technically you're doing this because it'll help us win Nationals so there's something in it for you so it doesn't really count as doing something nice. She: I'm just going to ignore what you just said. . .We have to find a way for the new kid to win the competition so he sticks around. Later she plots with him: Being the IT couple is so much harder than I thought. . . I am so stumped on how to lose this thing. In order to lose, "Rachel" and "Finn" giggly scheme to pick a lousy song and peform it offensively. (So they sing a love song ,"With You I'm Born Again", inappropriately dressed as a priest and a Catholic school girl.) "Finn" assures the new kid he no longer has feelings for the head cheerleader "Quinn": I'm with Rachel now. I mean she's a lot shorter than Quinn and she talks a lot, but I'm in love with her. "Quinn" also cites her in considering whether to partner with the new guy: What I need is to find a way to torture Rachel. So "Quinn" is very suspicious when "Rachel" promotes the partnership as a way for her to be "on top of the proverbial pyramid in every aspect of your life": What's your angle? . . Me winning means you losing and you'll do whatever it takes to make sure that doesn't happen, so what is in it for you? "Rachel": I agree, you're probably not going to beat Finn and I. But I just thought as the team captain, it would be good for the team to have healthy competition for 2nd place. While "Rachel" feigns surprise to the club at the outcome of the vote, "Finn" whispers congratulations when the other duo wins: We did it Babe. To make nice, both in the plot and, I think, to mollify the audience's impression of her, at the end "Rachel" approaches "Kurt" at his locker: I think that you and I are a little bit more similar than you think. "Kurt": That's a terrible thing to say. "Rachel" commiserates from personal experience: I know you're lonely. I can't even imagine how hard it must be to have feelings in high school that you can't act on for fear of being humiliated, ridiculed or worse. But we're going to win Nationals this year. And you know how we're going to do that? Because we have you. "Kurt": That's true. She: That's 12 people who love you just for being exactly the way that you are. I know you're lonely, but you're not alone. So, I was wondering if you would maybe want to sing a duet with me. I think you'll be really happy with my song selection - it's sort of everything both you and I love. He: But the duet competition is over. She: I thought this one could be for me and you.. The episode ends with their triumphant performance of "Get Happy/Happy Days Are Here Again", as originally done by Barbra Streisand and Judy Garland, with Michele superbly, full-on channeling a schmaltzy La Streisand, complete with sailor blouse and holding hands. (Wasn't it odd that Oprah managed never to use the J-word when Barbra had her final guest appearance on the show, even with their look back with Redford at The Way We Were, and had to be hastily reminded to add that the design book she was promoting could be given as a Hanukkah gift as well as for Christmas?)
In "Never Been Kissed", written by Brad Falchuk, the cheerleaders in the glee club snarkily comment they are surprised that "Rachel" is quiet and not bossing them around as usual. She testily explains she is fulfilling the teacher's assignment of opposite gender behavior, but zings they are sewing the sequins on the costumes wrong.
From Dave Itzkoff's interview with Ryan Murphy in The New York Times online 11/20/2010: "Q: You’ve said the bullying storyline won’t be contained to just this episode. How will you work the other characters into it? A. At the beginning, it is about the Chris Colfer character [gay Kurt], certainly. But as we get deeper into the episodes, it will be about how all the other kids are tortured and bullied. The kid in the wheelchair. The Jewish girl. Because they stick up for Kurt, they will all get increasingly tormented. So it’s not just about gay bullying – it’s about all different kinds that happen in schools. And how really, also, it’s about how educators struggle with what to do and when and how to do it. That’s something we are spending a lot of time and energy exploring – the teachers’ culpability and how, hopefully, we’ll shed a little light on the stress and struggles they go through, that in so many school districts, their policies are wrong."
In "The Substitute", by Ian Brennan, the series continued the annoying practice of condemning bullying of "Kurt", but tittering at put-downs of "Rachel" that are supposed to be compensated with recognition of her talent. With "Mr. Shue" out sick, she takes over the club: What solos would you like to hear me perform at Sectionals? They rebel, and "Kurt" begs the sub, "Holly Holiday" played by Gwyneth Paltrow, to take over. When she takes attendance, "Santana" mocks: I'm Rachel, [Finn's] loud girlfriend. The sub immediately sticks it to "Rachel": You suck! You're like a total drag! Has anyone ever told you that? "Puck" passes by: I have! "Rachel" later concedes: Maybe I should be more like you – all fun and forget about the consequences. Sub: Frankly, yes, you should. At least sometimes. When was the last time you did something just because it would be a blast? I mean you have all these great ideas. When was the last time you actually did one of them? . . .I used to be just like you, trying to get everything so right, hanging on so tight. (She's seen in geeky flashback.) "Rachel": What happened? Sub: I got punched in the face. "Rachel" agrees she needs to perform an upbeat number: I kind of need a partner. The sub grins with her 'catch phrase': I thought you'd never ask! They do an exuberant song and dance duet of "Nowadays/Hot Honey Rag" from Chicago, ending with a hug. "Rachel" throws her support to bring back "Mr. Schuester: I used to think I was the best thing in this school. But I was wrong. It's Mr. Shue.
"Furt", written by Ryan Murphy, continued the bullying protest, and even revealed a scintilla of misgivings for picking on "Rachel". She agrees with the rest of the group that "Kurt" is depressed, in her selfish fashion, and argues that they should help him: He's barely even competing with me for solos. Similarly, when he announces he's leaving for another school: I've never been so disappointed in you before. . .Does this mean you're gong to be competing against us in Sectionals? In another story line, she confesses to "Finn" that she didn't really have sex with "Jesse". "Finn": I had a feeling, considering how much of a prude you are with me. Not that I'm complaining. She smiles: Now we can save it for each other. So he warns her nemesis "Santana" to keep secret that they had sex: If Rachel found out, she'd break up with me. "Santana: And this would be bad because? He responds chivalrously: Because I'm in love with her and I don't want to hurt her feelings. "Santana" sneers: That midget? She's like an anchor dragging you down. He: Stop it Santana! That's my girlfriend!. She: Then maybe I'll tell her. If you two broke up, we'd be free to see each other, right? Later, "Rachel" comes in all dressed up for "Finn"s widowed mother's remarriage. "Finn": You look amazing! I just really love you! She glows with a "Me too." In "Finn"s toast, he calls their coupledom "Finchel". There's a bizarre side story where the cheerleader coach "Sue Sylvester"s mom shows up to attend her daughter's just plain odd solo wedding after years away from her family claiming to have been a Nazi hunter: And to think I was going to send you to Israel for your honeymoon. They love me there.
"Special Education", by Brad Falchuk, continued to mock "Rachel" in a way it condemns treatment of other characters, even while appreciating her talent and empathy from "Kurt", albeit with a Jewish jab. She starts announcing that she has made the selection for her solos for Sectionals, when the Glee Club teacher interrupted that he's changing the focus to dance. She: What – they're going to dance in front of me while I do my solo? "Mr. Shue": You are not getting a solo in this competition, Rachel. "Mercedes" is, well, glee-ful: Finally! So what song do I get to sing? When he announces who will be duetting, "Rachel" calls them "Ken and Barbie" and "Quinn" snaps back: You used to just be dislikeable, but now I feel like punching you every time you open your mouth! "Finn" supports "Rachel", calling her "the star quarterback", and arguments ensue. "Santana" attacks: Your boyfriend is a hypocrite. "Rachel": Like you even know what that means? "Santana": It means your boyfriend is full of crap, Hobbit. "Rachel" confronts her: You know what, ever since the wedding, you've been up my butt and I'm sick of it! "Santana" points to "Finn" for defending "Rachel": Oh yeah? Well, that's not what you thought last year in that motel room. That's right, Yentl. Your sweetheart – he's been lying to you. Because he and I totally got it on last year. "Rachel" is upset: Just tell me if it's true. "Finn": OK, I'm sorry I lied to you. But I just thought that if I told you the truth you'd get so mad at me. To tell the truth, you're kind of scary. She: Don't you see that it's a lot worse now? Why her?. . .Do you think she's prettier than me? The guidance counselor interrupts – it turns out they're talking in her office: Don't answer that! "Rachel" explains: My dads went to couples' counseling because one of them put up wallpaper in the den without asking the other and they said it was the only thing that kept them from killing each other. We need your help. That's why I set up this counseling session. The counselor suggests they use their talents and try singing to each other, like betrayal songs by the Eagles. But "Finn" argues: Why are you so caught up with who it was? She: Is it because she's hot? He: Yes, sure, she's super hot. She: As a therapist, is it therapeutic for me to slap him right now? The counselor quickly: I'm not a therapist. Maybe you should storm out.. And "Rachel" does.
She ostentatiously walks into the next Glee Club with duct tape over her mouth (and wearing a loud polka dot outfit) and confronts "Mr. Shue": You silenced my talents. I'm merely protesting. . .My talents are wasted in this club. My star shines too bright and I think you're threatened by it! He's having a bad day himself and very uncharacteristically explodes: I'm tired of this Rachel! You have a terrible attitude! You are a lousy sport! And it is not OK any more! She rises: Well, I'm upset! I'm furious about this! A couple of things, actually. (And glares at "Finn".) "Mr. Shue" expands: I'm sorry you're disappointed, but you could also make the choice to be happy that we're part of a glee club that is bursting at the seams with talent. There's an awful lot of 'my' talk going around. 'What's in it for me?' 'What solo am I going to sing?' Now when we go to Sectionals we're going to be good sports. . .When [others] win we're going to congratulate them because that's what we do. Out in the hallway, "Santana" blows a kiss to "Finn", and blows by "Rachel": Did I tell you he bought me dinner after? "Puck" stops by and is uncharacteristically empathetic: Rachel, are you OK? She: Are you talking to me? Are you going to steal something from me? He explains how his recent ordeal being locked inside a port-a-pottie for 24 hrs. has affected him: I promised God that if he got me out of there I'd start being nicer to people. No way I could do that, so I changed it to just Jews. He sympathizes about her "boyfriend troubles" and they walk down the hall arm in arm, with she complimenting his muscles.
Her lonely practice is later interrupted by "Kurt": Don't bother spying on me to get a leg up on solos. I'm getting to Sectionals in my mind. But he's there to ask for help with his solo audition: Because even though we hate each other, we've had our moments! And I could use your expertise. And no one knows how to kill a ballad quite like you. You are as brilliant and talented as you are irritating. She: This might be my only chance to sing for a little while, so I'll give you a couple of tips. She nixes his Celine Dion selection, and urges him to do a more personal choice: Do you ever fantasize about your own funeral? He: No. She: Of Finn throwing himself into the grave out grief and all the heartfelt speeches and the regrets.. He: That's insane. She: Clearly no one in the Glee Club appreciates me. So is it wrong for me to fantasize about them finally realizing how amazing I am and it being too late? And there's only one song that expresses these feelings. She takes center stage, and then she and "Kurt" exchange verses of, this is very funny, Evita's "Don't Cry for Me Argentina". Wherein, "Kurt" is told that the goal at his new school is to fit in, not stand out. At the competition, she helps him get ready. He: How come you were never this nice to me when I was your teammate? She: Because you were my only real competition. They hug it out and from the audience she reminds him to smile.
But it turns out he already knew about "Finn"s infidelity, and she confronts the Glee Club: Everybody knew but me! "Santana": Nobody tell you anything because you are a blabber mouth, and we all just pretend to like you. "Puck": No, I kinda like her. "Finn": It happened when you were dating another guy so you don't really have a right to be pissed at me. OK, I shouldn't have lied about it. But that's not what you really care about. What you really care about is the Santana of it all. She: Who are you right now? Guys, you're going to have to find somebody else to mindlessly harmonize in the background, because I'm not going on stage with him! But the teacher gives a pep talk to them all, and they tie winning Sectionals, and she even hugs "Finn" in all the excitement. Back at school, she's walking the stairs with him: When I started Glee Club, Mr. Shue said being part of something special makes you special and somewhere here along the way I lost that. But winning at Sectionals reminded me of that. "Finn": So we're part of something special, you and me? She says "Yes." He: I love you. No more lying. Ever. Hug. She: There's something I need to tell you. Last week when we were fighting? I was so mad at you that I wanted you to feel as bad as I felt. I'm so sorry, but it will never happen again. (We see the flashback of she and "Puck" making out for a bit before he decides he can't betray "Finn" again.) But "Finn" is mad: I thought you were a lot of things, and I loved you because and in spite of all of them, but I never thought you were mean. She: I'm saying I'm sorry. Didn't what you did with Santana kind of cancel this out? He: We weren't together then! I didn't cheat on you. How could you do this to me? She: It was a mistake! Maybe we should go to another counseling session. He: You can't have couples counseling if you're not a coulple. She: You're breaking up with me? He: What you did was really bad Rachel, and you knew how sensitive I would be about this after what happened with Quinn. He walks away. She calls after him: You said you'd never break up with me! He: I never thought you'd make me feel like this. Back at class, "Mr. Shue" announces: I think we should celebrate the best waywe know. So Rachel, how would you like to solo? She: I don't really feel like a solo right now. She defers to "Mercedes", walks out, and tears down "Finn 4Ever" from inside her locker.
"A Very Glee Christmas", by Ian Brennan, lamely didn't even try to deal with the December Dilemma. "Rachel" tries to win back "Finn" by creating a winter wonderland on stage, explaining: Being a Jew, I don't usually give Christmas gifts, but given how much you care about the holiday, I can make an exception. She offers him a I.O.U. to pick any song for her to sing. He declines, but she: Just like Broadway, the show must go on. Besides, the AV Club worked so hard on the snow. But instead of a generic winter song, she sings a schmaltzy 'Merry Christmas, Darling'. She keeps pursuing "Finn" with more Christmas songs: Last Christmas I asked Santa to give me you., but he keeps backing off: You mess me up Rachel. Can't you see how screwed up I am about this? I've had two girlfriends and both cheated on me. You can ask Santa again next year, but I'm officially breaking up with you. She invites the glee teacher to share Christmas Eve at her house: We're going to eat Chinese and watch "The Main Event". Was the plug that the inventor of the movable legs for the paralyzed kid is Israeli supposed to make up for the lack of even a token mention of, or conflict about, Hanukkah? I was so disappointed that there wasn't a Hanukkah song on the album either.
Michele sang "America the Beautiful" during the Super Bowl, but there was no reference to her Jewish identity in the bruited post-episode "The Sue Sylvester Bowl Shuffle" by Ian Brennan, and even her personality was somewhat on its best behavior. While she first objects to the football team joining the glee club for the week in loyalty to our two dads --I will not be in the same room with known homophobes!--she quickly lets her preening ego win out over her principles: As offended as I am by their appearance here, I will not let anything get in the way of a performance., and she does a sweet duet of Lady Antebellum's "Need You Now" with "Puck" intended to make "Finn" jealous.
In "Sexy" by Brad Falchuk, the only references to "Rachel" are cutting remarks by "Santana", about how she wears tights to how she takes over temporary chairmanship of the Chastity Club: Because you take over everything? (More commentary coming, particularly on "the Jewish nose" episode.) (updated 3/11/2011)

18 To Life (Canadian Broadcasting Corp. summer import to the CW, which was scheduled to run 6 weeks of 2 episodes a week, but pulled it after just 3 weeks. CBC ran the full first season and renewd it for a 2nd season.) In this Montreal-set sit com, created by and mostly written by Derek Schreyer and Karen Troubetzkoy, about 18 year old next door neighbors rushing into marriage, "Ben Bellow" the groom is from a secular Jewish family, whose father converted. Mom is "Judith" (played by Ellen David, who has also gone by the name Ellen Cohen), and also has two daughters, the younger "Wendy" (played by Arielle Shiri) living at home and "the big sister from Downtown" "Monica" (played by Kaniehtiio Horn). The joke is that the gentile family is easy-going, leftist hippies, while the Jewish family is conventionally straight-laced, so both are initially against the marriage. As "Judith" protests the engagement in the first episode "A Simple Proposal": Why are you doing this to us? . . .We're not going to stand by and watch our only son ripped from our arms!.
Here's the CBC's character descriptions of the Jewish females:
"Tom's mom, Judith, has a way of making Ben believe all her ideas are his, which makes her the real power of the house. Though her primary role has been Ben's Wife, Judith has had a few jobs over the years. When Ben was struggling to complete the bar, she ran a successful mail order business from home that more than paid the bills (though Ben's conveniently forgotten this episode of their lives). Still, she is much more comfortable exuding control from places that are hard to see. Judith is a traditionalist, and if the term may bother her feminist neighbours, well, she'll pour it on even thicker to rile them."
"Tom's older sister is the practical one, when she's not over-imbibing. The consummate latté-swilling city gal, Monica will bend over backwards to convince Tom of his mistake. Yet to discerning eyes, Monica's Sex-In-The-City lifestyle doesn't look too hot. One day Monica will discover she's actually upset her little bro beat her to the punch. But until then, she'll aim plenty of scathing barbs at Tom without spilling a drop of her latté."
"If there's one person who could prevent Tom from growing up, it'd be his little sister Wendy. Theirs was (and still is) a relationship of Three "T's" - teasing, tickling, and torturing. A rebel in sheep's clothing, Wendy relishes taking Tom down a notch or three. Growing up, Wendy and Tom enjoyed playing "blame the other", a game at which Wendy was particularly adept. But they're also fiercely loyal. Wendy's a precocious teen, possessing an adult vocabulary and insight that at times can be disconcerting. Though she has big ambitions in life, for now she enjoys being a kid, something she hopes Tom doesn't forget himself."
Are Jews in Montreal known to be right-wing conservatives? In the third episode, "It's My Party" by Jenn Engels, "Judith" fondly reminisces about meeting her husband at an anti-nukes rally – when he was attacking the demonstrators. "Monica" is portrayed as money-conscious, planning to "invite all of Mom's rich friends" to the bridal shower, rating the guests by net worth, and anticipating which expensive gifts she can take as her cut for planning the party; the mother of the bride sarcastically calls her the fraught sobriquet "princess". "Judith" confesses she hadn't told her friends about the marriage: Then maybe I wouldn’t have to tell them when my 18 year old son gets divorced., then relenting and inviting them over for a "Mazel Tov!" when she hears just how the bride has loved him since childhood.
"Goy Story" by Skander Halim, who also wrote Pretty Persuasion, was full of exaggerations that seemed to be intended to be realistic, not satiric, but I recognized echoes of how my nephew finessed between his mother and his bride:
"Judith" has invited the couple over for dinner: So Jessie, how do you like the matzo ball soup? "Jessie" responds sweetly sarcastic: It needs some bacon bits. "Tom" quickly adds: She's kidding! "Judith" is casual: I knew that – joking's in our DNA! She and her husband kibbitz about various Jewish comics, but she moves on: You know, Jessie, there's probably a lot you can learn about our people. "Jessie" takes a big breath: You know, guys, there's no way I would ever conv- "Tom" interrupts quickly: converse about something like this without keeping an open mind. "Judith": So you'll both come for dinner next Friday? Because I've invited Rabbi Goldstein, that's the rabbi who converted your father. . .So what's the technical term for a divorced Jewish woman? A plaintiff!
The couple talk in the library. "Tom": I'm just saying, if you come right out and say you're never converting, there's going to be huge drama. "Jessie": If I don't press and crease my jeans there's huge drama with your mom. . . So you want me to let her think there's even a possibility? That doesn't solve anything. It just delays the inevitable. "Tom": Yes, but the inevitable takes so much longer when it's delayed. "Jessie": But isn't that incredibly disrespectful to your religion? "Tom": Disrespectful to the rabbi, maybe. But to the religion, solid. It's just a white lie. Not even white – translucent. [The rest of the episode revolves around hiding and revealing various lies – including the ridiculous one that somehow his dad has been hiding from his wife all these years that he didn't go through with the circumcision.]
"Jessie"s mom lectures her against organized religion as oppressive, so insists on joining them for dinner, where she turns her nose up at paper plates and plastic utensils – how classy and wasteful! "Judith" explains: It just so happens that the rabbi keeps kosher and we do not. It's a religious observance. The in-law snorts: Good to know you kill trees to go to heaven. . . Why are you trying to brainwash my daughter? "Judith": I am merely trying to expose her to a different way of thinking. I mean she's an open-minded, intelligent girl, like – there must be someone. What's [her father's] mother like? "Judith" excuses her elder daughter as she proudly serves dinner: Here comes my famous kugle!. . .Wendy is at a Young Conservatives rally. The mother-in-law whispers: Do you see Jessie? This is how they rope us in.
The Rabbi addresses "Jessie": Judith said you expressed an interest in our faith. "Jessie": Actually, I think she expressed that interest for me. Her mother interjects: I just have to get this out there. It is possible to live a life without being bound by religion. "Judith": If you like to drift around aimlessly with no direction or purpose. The in-law: All right, Jessie is not converting! "Jessie": All I'm saying is that, while I respect your religion, I'm not really comfortable with the intention of this dinner. Her mother: Some of us feel religion has wreaked havoc the world over. Suddenly, the older sister "Monica" shows up and her brother asks her not to make things worse: Tom, please, what kind of manipulative, self-serving bitch do you think I am? But she starts hinting at her father's lies, asking the rabbi about the brit and circumcision, for a silly discussion that leads to exposure all around, including "Tom" blurting out about his wife: She has no intention of converting. Never did! "Monica" grins at the shouted chaos: Best family dinner ever. L'chaim! (updated 9/3/2010)

Entourage - Mrs. Ari Gold in the 7th season (on HBO) While I still haven't gotten around to commenting here on the previous season of my favorite Jewish couple on TV, this season's opening episode "Stunted", written and directed by series creator Doug Ellin around a theme of macho posturing, had what I think was the first time one of the boys commented admiringly about their marriage. As "E" faces his own nuptials, he stops "Ari" from his sarcastic jokes about his wife: You're the perfect picture of marital bliss. The Mrs. is seen a couple of times on the phone demanding that "Ari" join her at a school parent/teacher conference: I like it when we do these things together! She's almost mollified with a promise of a fancy dinner when he cancels again – almost.
"Buzzed" by Ally Musika introduces jealousy for one of the first times in the series, as the Mrs. catches "Ari" congratulating a comely, ambitious colleague in the office– when he was supposed to be shopping with her for a vintage chandelier. This becomes a key incident for "Ari" for the season, as he risks his business and reputation to appease his wife to prove his fealty to their marriage. In "Dramedy", by Ellin, his kids warn him before breakfast that their mother is mad at him. Their daughter warns: You have have done something wrong! He nervously pleads with the Mrs. in the kitchen: Tell them, honey, that we're all good. Mrs.: What am I so upset about?. . The slut who ruined your best friend's career and marriage is still working in your office. I still don't understand why you didn't fire her last year! And if that wasn't enough, for some reason you were spinning her around as if you'd just won Dancing With the Stars. Why were you spinning her around, Ari? He explains his excitement over getting an NFL team for L.A. But the Mrs. persists: I don’t like that gal, Ari, I don't like her one bit. But that night when he announces what he did at work, she's taken aback: What? You fired her? Now I feel bad! "Ari" shows his priorities: She'll be fine. What about us?
In "Bottoms Up", by Ally Musika, the "Golds" are having uncomfortable sex in bed, with the Mrs. yelling "Ow!" several times, until she pushes him off her: Why are you so angry? He apologizes, and admits he's mad at the woman he fired, who is on a revengeful tear through Hollywood. Mrs. is annoyed: You were thinking about her while you were having sex with me? Do you have some kind of confession to make? He explains how she's been raiding his clients: Baby, that's what marriage is for, to have sex so you can bang out your anger. I'm sure you've done it to me. But the Mrs. walks away. He confesses that he has been neglecting some of his clients due to the NFL deal. Mrs: Yeah, you've been neglecting some other people too. He: "Baby we were just having sex! Mrs: You were having sex! He pleads for her to come back to bed: Baby, you can't leave me like this! How am I gong to work? Mrs: Work yourself Ari. That evening, the Mrs. comes home to a hallway strewn with rose petals, leading to "Ari" in a petal-filled bed: I saved the most important meeting of the day for last. Let me show you how much you mean to me. Mrs: Maybe I want to hear it. He: Can I do it after? I still have blue balls from this morning. Mrs: You lost your hustle. He: I love you! You are the most important person in the world to me! I owe everything to you! You're beautiful! She smiles: OK, you can tell me more after we're done. And she strips to reveal scanty, sexy lingerie. As they kiss in bed, with her thonged ass prominently in the lens (that ties together the theme for the episode), the phone rings. She answers it: I'm giving you a taste of your own medicine. He gets bad business news, so that even when he gets back to kissing her she asks: Are you angry? I'll take a rain check. and walks away with a swaying wiggle.
In "Hair", by Ellin, the Mrs. comes to the office after he has gotten awful news about the public revenge the fired woman is taking. Ironically, the Mrs. comes in criticizing him for how he talks to his new assistant, as the ex-employee claims to have tapes of how he talks to employees. The Mrs. has come in with swatches to redecorate his office: I would like you to be involved. It would give us something to do together. We never do anything together. He disagrees. Mrs. Not any more we don't. . .Since the merger, I don't feel good. . .Because you're never home, and with this NFL thing. . .I feel like you've been keeping a lot of secrets lately. He promises her dinner to talk about it all, but she's waiting in the car when he stops to deal with his biggest client's latest disaster.
In "Tequila and Coke", by Elli